| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 5/20/2006 6:50:44 PM |
@rainmaiden: because I felt I could form better friendships, relationships, etc
fantastic! You wouldn't like to write a howto for the benefit of us older guys and the younger ladies who are missing out would you ?
*MWAH*
I wouldn't know what to write in a how to. And I'm sure it would sound preachy if I tried. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 5/20/2006 7:04:46 PM | Comments??? I should say so!! For every garden putter there are an equal number if beer-guzzling couch potatoes with bellies to prove it. Age is a matter of attitude, and for the same reason I am probably going to end up with someone younger than me because from where I sit, many men my age have not taken care of themselves. I'd prefer someone my own age (mas o menos), because life experience counts for a lot, and because I prefer the way an older man approaches lovemaking to youger men (generalizations I know, but my limited experience). I do yoga twice a week, take tango lessons, and walk to errands. I watch very little TV, which I think is responsible for the demise of many a marriage...by the time you turn the thing off, you're too tired for the good stuff!
You are right though..it is important to know what you want and make a list.
I have been married twice..boith long marriages and both my husbands were 10 years older than me. Maybe I like men in their 40's??? They know what they want and they can still get up to it! :-) | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 11:15:27 AM | | I am a 27 year old single mom and for the longest i had a hard time finding a guy who could accept the fact that i have a kid and she and my education are a bigger priority to me than the bar scene. Luckily a little over a year ago i met a wonderful man (thank you POF) who is 20 years older than me. This has been the best relationship i have ever been in. So many people place to much store in age, when you should be finding somebody that can be your best friend, lover, companion and confidant. Somebody that you know ten fifteen years down the road you two will still be giggling like a couple of teenagers that just fell in love. Share the same interests, ands goals. Just don't discount somebody because they were not in the age range you were looking in. Oh yeah make sure they are legal, and know what they are getting into. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 11:27:22 AM | | It worked so well for me, I married the guy. I will be happy to offer the inside workings of May-December relationships. As my Mama always said, "Better to be an old man's darling, than a young man's slave". lol Just teasing guys. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 11:43:29 AM | | In my own experience..NO. My ex-husband was older than myself by 18 years. I am outgoing and active and I like to stay fit and I like to socialize with friends. His only outdoor activity was playing golf and he did not like to go out or socialize unless it was work related. I took up golf in order for us to have something to do together but it was a nightmare trying to play a round with him. He "insisted" on trying to teach me how to play properly (his way). He also was very needy and jealous. I never game him reason to be, but his insecurity about our age difference continually came up. He was looking to me to take care of him and be a nurse maid but failing to meet my needs. Finally our generational and life style issues finally caught up with us and we parted ways. At least I can say that we parted on good terms. But I also know that I will not date a man that much older than myself and one who is not as active as myself. It just will not work out in the long run. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 11:51:22 AM | | Age is just a number. Because of my youthfull looks and attitude, I tend to date younger women. I also date women that are older than me. My longest relationship is 5 years with a woman that was 12 years younger. It didn't end the way I wanted, but it was a great 5 years. My mother's husband is 7 years younger than her. They have been married for 18. They were seeing each other for a couple of years before that. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 11:55:34 AM | | What motivates an older man in the first place? Sex? Feel good about themselves? That's probably all they get but since that's what they want. What so the yougn woman want? Money? Well, if they get both what they want, of course it will work. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 12:59:05 PM | He also was very needy and jealous. I never game him reason to be, but his insecurity about our age difference continually came up. He was looking to me to take care of him and be a nurse maid but failing to meet my needs. Finally our generational and life style issues finally caught up with us and we parted ways. At least I can say that we parted on good terms. But I also know that I will not date a man that much older than myself and one who is not as active as myself. It just will not work out in the long run.
Good Lord, were we married to the same man?? LOL
Gimme someone who's in high school. or younger, I know exactly where they're coming from.
Yeah, their cradle!!! This is very very scary. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 2:19:50 PM | It can work, it's just not my thing. I dated a guy who was 20 years older than me when I was 29, he was nice but I felt really weird when we'd go out, I would notice alot of older men with older wives looking at him with envy lol...kinda creepy. My best friend dates guys significantly older, she's 27 and prefers men around the age of 40-44....I think that's a good age difference. I personally prefer younger guys....they help me to connect with my inner wild-child  | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 2:28:35 PM | Oh the H***** you say!!! It about stinks a big one that young women are looking for an easy life rather than make their own way in the world....POINT ONE
POINT TWO
These guys my age are kidding themselves to think anyone 20 years younger is interested in them!!! to have such a fragile ego is annoying.
BOTH need to grow up. If all he is after is sex...just say so and quit tantilizing these lifeless give up all for an easy life women...and if they truly just want a sugar daddy...fess up honey...
most likely if he is divorced in the 50's his ex took all his money...he just wants a little to make him feel better.
OK, yes, this is harsh, but the ego and easy life, DO HAVE A PRICE....both are pathetic!
PS
Yes, I was a trophy wife....only stupid me, didn't realize it at the time...and he was my age! I thought he liked me because I had a brain....yea right...not really bitter(even tho this may sound like it!!), just not in to all the head games and shallow life style.
Believe me there is so much more out there.  | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 2:38:23 PM | | Easy is not starting a business in the garage and working 20 hours a day until you've created something you can be proud of. Easy is not giving your husband CPR trying to keep him alive until the EMS can get there. Easy is not holding him in your arms and the last words he utters are "I love you". So, if that is anyone's definition of a trophy wife, then by God, I was one and proud of it. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 2:44:31 PM | Perhaps somebody who likes to mention their "fragile ego" and their need to "grow up" is not their idea of an ideal partner? 
Yes, there is much more out there. And most of them are younger. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 2:44:41 PM | I feel it could and does work (within reason) I met someone today. Spoke with her for about ten minutes. I could not believe how comfortable I felt speaking with her in these few minutes and her views on things. I took a real good look at her and saw she was 25 tops. I'm all depressed now. :(
This is the one occasion where I did feel intimidated. I exited stage left on the double even. :P | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 3:50:21 PM | The dates in this forum confuse me as they are not chronological but I simply chose to respond to the first message.
After reading a number of opinions (Many very well thought out) I feel the bottom line is the particular pairing; it either works or it doesn't. As many have pointed out, a stereotype tends to bias some younger women to the point they will not even consider an older man. Then there are those that simply do not find older men attractive which is fine. My best friend always liked women sometimes 20+ years older where my preference was younger and still is. But, that is not to say I would deny the company of a woman my age if she indeed wanted to participate in the activities I enjoy. This is where I find the crossroad! One entry states how men my age still possess a boyishness which creates a spontaneous approach to life. I agree and at the same time agree with the rebuttal that one should not assume older women simply wish to veg at home. Unfortunately, from my experience it is too often the latter or too many ladies are not physically able to jump in the car, head for Disneyland, and ride a rollercoaster; something a younger woman can often do in a heartbeat. Please understand I am perfectly aware there are thousands of women my age in as good and probably better shape than I am, but most are already in a relationship simply because of how wonderful they are! Sure, Sarah from Salmon, Idaho or Beth from Patterson, Louisiana fit every dream a person could ever imagine except for one issue… distance!!! I don't give a rat's ass what people say that distance is not a barrier, but that is plain bull. The time and financial impact deters the majority of people from even looking much further than 50 miles and that in itself narrows the field incredibly. As Jack London's short story "The Boxer" demonstrates, aging is a paradox for we understand the subtle approach necessary to reach a goal yet may lack the stamina once enjoyed in our younger days and find ourselves viewed as ready for pasture. Truth is an older man knows perfectly well how to feed and sustain a loving relationship with a younger woman. It is unfortunately a quest for "El Dorado" more often than not. "If I only knew what I know now when I was 18!" echoes through eternity. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 6:36:47 PM | | I really believe age is just a number. I dated a woman 11 years younger than myself and we had the best relationship (sadly, her job took her away and we agreed that it would be better if we didn't pursue a long distance thing). I've dated women my own age and had nothing in common with them. It's all about common interests and common core values. If you connect and thoroughly enjoy each others' company who cares about the age (as long as it is over the age of consent) | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 6/30/2006 6:39:40 PM | | Young women look great and are fun in bed. Of course there is no place for conversation to go, but, they look great and are fun in bed. It works until that starts to matter, the lack of conversation. Or until she realizes she isn't getting anything she needs. It's fun for a while. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 7/1/2006 10:02:27 PM | Age really is just a number...and sometimes numbers matter and sometimes they don't. Frankly, I usually find more in common with older men, always have. Of course, if I keep having these dratted birthdays, it's gonna get harder and harder to find men that much older than me that can still keep up! :)
I find it amusing to see men 10-15 years older than me wanting to date women in their 20s and 30s. Sure, it can work, and I say more power to both sides, but if I'd wanted children, I'd have adopted one. Don't want to date them.
Sapph | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 7/1/2006 10:08:30 PM |
Women in the same age group want to stay home with a good book, go to craft shows and putter around in the garden.
It's NOT about "trophy dates" it's about fun and vitality and living life and having fun. The problem is that the majority of women in their late 30's / early 40's don't seem to be attracted to men in their 50's. ANY COMMENTS?
Well, jeez louise, yet another older man slamming older women. Oddly, I have trouble finding a man over 35 who can keep up to me......and I am 50. Maybe that is why the women in their late 30s /early 40s aren't interested in men in their 50s? They need someone who isn't 1/2 dead and who can still keep them amused. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 7/2/2006 1:56:11 AM | | I love older men. I prefer them actually. I'm 25 and men who are 40 and older are just plain hott but it depends on the personality. I think it's the mature mentality of most men 40 and over. I find that most of the ones I meet are emotionally and financially stable. That's a turn-on for me. I love to have deep conversations and it's hard to find men around my age who can stimulate my intellectual side. I've been dating older men since I started dating. I don't think I can be with a guy around my age. I've tried it recently and young guys just don't do it for me. | |
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 7/2/2006 4:48:55 AM | Older men dating younger women-- does it work?
Of course it does and will til the end of time.
But then so does younger men dating older women.
I think we should abolish age thing altogether-- IMO-- the number one, almost daily, topic here in these forums. And when you think about it, our whole lives are governed by our age. It's no wonder that men and women have these same issues day after day in one way or another. We are never allowed to get away from the "age" thing.
I think that upon birth, your birthdate should go on a microchip embedded somewhere in your body and not removed until your death. No records are ever kept. And you never know what your age is! And all the years in between you don't care how old they are and they don't care how old you are, because Age is of no importance. Life and what you make of it is, and as it should be. And that becomes the primary goal. And all should just go for it.
Go to school early or later; graduate college at 17 or 35. Get a job. And if you want, work until rapture; or retire early. See a prospective lover/spouse and if you like what you see-- then you BOTHER to FIND OUT if they enjoy life the way you do, instead of assuming otherwise; as it happens now on both sides of 40. And if they don't, but want to, you teach them! Or they teach you.
How do you find out? You ask! No more assumptions where once you'd give 'em a pass just because of their number. This way neither sex has the advantage! You then find out together if the TWO of you would be compatible in the bedroom and like being there a lot -- riding a motorcycle, sailing a boat, kayaking, snow-skiing -- enjoying being active-- or just living a life in a lawn chair watching others having fun. And if they are not what you want, you move on, just as you do now -- but NOT because of a number.
But that is a fantasy world... back in this one. I say date whatever age (within legal boundaries) you want -- younger women/older men -- younger men/older women -- love whomever you want and enjoy your time together, because it ain't ever gonna come this way again. But puleeze stop complaining and whining and bashing about your preferences. In the long run, they're not going to matter anyway.
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| Older men dating younger women --- does it work??
Posted: 7/2/2006 8:44:32 AM | @ Charlie girl:
Okay madam. I know of a piece of dogmeat who IS living with a now 18 year old girl. He is 44 and was living with her when she was 17. Does this fit into your theory of mind over matter? 14 is legal here in Canada. How about a 14 year old and a 25 year old? Do you see this as normal behavior. The same applies to a 34 year old woman and a 17 year old boy. It seems to have more impact when it is a younger girl/older molester male though. | |
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