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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 4/25/2009 4:19:50 PM | Well I don't have those "requirements" listed on my page but for me those things are a must. And here is why....
I have a great career, a nice car, and a very comfortable place of my own to live so why would I want someone who has less then myself. I'm not after any man's cash but I certainly do expect the person I date to be a man, an actual grown up, a man who is able to take care of himself. I don't think that is wrong of me to ask that the man I date has what I have, actually I think it's quite fair.
[/I am wondering, are there so many unemployed, car less, men living on the streets or with their parents that are looking for love that this is a problem, or are these women gold-diggers?]
Also to answer your question, I'm sure that there are some woman out there who are straight up gold diggers (I won't dare deny my gender's flaw's), however there are others like myself who want a man who can "bring to the table" what she "brings to the table". And yes there does seem to be a rash outbreak of what I like to call manchildren, those who cannot support themselves nor have really any interest in doing so. Those are the type of men it seems that don't want to grow up (some woman are like this as well). It is a problem and certainly one I try my darndest to avoid. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 4/25/2009 5:24:08 PM | | I have talked to way too many men on this site, who have NO JOB, NO HOME, NO CAR, that is why we ask. I have my act together, so why would I want someone who needs me to support them...We are NOIT gold diggers, we just don't want to have to pay their way in life. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 4/25/2009 7:42:04 PM | na ..... id like someone independent that doesnt make me after anyones cash. If a man can take care of himself then hes responsible and capable of taking out the trash when i marry him. haha..  | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 4/25/2009 9:06:14 PM |
It's just a matter of being able to support yourself. We don't need you to have a BMW or make over a huge amount of money, we don't even need you to have a house in Bel Air, we just want someone who is mature enough and stable.
Uh huh...sounds good in theory. So what of the women that have these demands yet can't fulfill them themselves? As in, they have no car, no home, and no job/underemployed?
Then what? Still gonna say this is just about knowing a man can support himself?
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight... | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 4/26/2009 11:11:42 AM | | There is such a thing as tact and they aren't using it. I want someone who has those things too cause I have them and worked hard for them. But you can find these things out tactfully in a phone conversation. It's an extra step or two but it's just plain nice to remain human and not be so blunt and disregard the feelings of people who don't have those things. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/2/2009 6:54:25 PM | I agree with your statement lost. I dated a guy that lived with his mother at 36 cuz he was "taking care of her", he had a job but did not make what I did. His car was broke (or so I thought) None of those things mattered because he seemed to be honerable and responsible. Problem was,,,,,,he was none of those things. After 1 month I got out.
Its totally understadable with the economy the way it is that there are a lot of people out of work. I do not discredit those who are in this situation, however it comes down to the individual and their accountability and responsibility. In my case he was looking for a sugar mama. Only advise i give my single gal pals is look for the warning signs. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/2/2009 8:55:36 PM | What I require is for a man to be able to take care of himself. If he is taking care of his parents or living home for some other legitimate reason, then that is ok. If they are lazy or a mooch then it is not ok. I am never going to completley support a man again. I will pool out money togther so we can take care of each other, but I will not sole break winner ever again.
Honeslty, this is exactly what most men want in a women to. It MAY change when kids come into play, but to start with men want to know that women can take care of themselves as well. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/18/2009 5:15:55 PM | | Too true,I mean really...Hitler had a house a car and a job did that make him a great catch?These things we think we own we sometimes use to define who we are.....I am alone, Why i would want to buy a whole house to live in is beyond me, I would rather travel and save my money.I work and have a great job.I have no dependants.I have no debt,Does this mean i have no financial stability? Does this mean i'm not a great guy?hardly..... | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/19/2009 1:42:24 AM | I know where these woman are coming from. BUT I do have to laugh at most of those..
The questions..
you have a house ,, did you get the house in a divorce, is it paid for ?
The car,, most of us know that car is more important to a woman than a man. often the female will have the better car or newer car and making payments on that car.. and have no problem buying a 20,000$ car, paying 12,000 in interest and before that car is payed for it's broken
The job ... This I'll just take a shot in the dark, From what I see in the last ten years as the big companies move out of the USA. There seems to be more males unemployed than females, just in the last two year the drop in economy has almost doubled this factor in my area. Don't know just guessing..
Home, yep I have two of those, built both, there are paid for, The One I live in is 35 years old, the outside looks 35 yrs old, inside is brand new and will reveal any mini Manson built today. why I did construction for many years and still do. I know how to build, wire. plumb, where and how to buy at a low cost..
car,, Ihave 7 ,, newest one is 19 yrs old the next is 23 yrs old and has over 500,000 miles on it. The rest are all Hot rods and over 40 yrs old, all these fit in a shop built just for them.
Job/income came from truck driving, the wifes word were " get areal job ".. income tax time, ask her how much did I take in this year,, answer was always over $120,000,, key word " take in " not " put in pocket"
was this good enough or is that good enough now, nope . why ?
I live to far way from a big city, a whole 50 miles, no wal mart or costco
when you see this in a profile, read the whole thing, most these women want to travel the world = $$$$$$$$$ .. fine dinning =$$$$$$$ sking = $$$$$$ horses = $$$$$$$$ need I go on.
Some site you enter the income bracket your seeking, many will have $100,000
do the math, 52 weeks a year,, How much per week ?? anyone here even take this much in ?
I do..   70% goes right back out .. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/19/2009 8:16:38 AM | | Why would a women go after someone worth less than her? Maybe if she does not think much of herself? If a man is smart, educated, and works hard he can do well in life. It is much harder for a women. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/19/2009 10:20:02 AM | | I can understand a woman wanting a guy who can take car of himself, has a decent job, making it on his own and so on... I guess what I do hate is that when men doesn't want to date a woman because of certain things such as size or weight. Its viewd at as being a shallow dog. Its the double standard that I don't understand. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/19/2009 11:37:39 AM | "I can understand a woman wanting a guy who can take car of himself, has a decent job, making it on his own and so on... I guess what I do hate is that when men doesn't want to date a woman because of certain things such as size or weight. Its viewd at as being a shallow dog. Its the double standard that I don't understand. "
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The only thing that I can understand is that a guy can take care of himself. If that's not true initially and he's a great person and he's trying his best to change that, where's the problem? Also, "decent job," what kind of crap is that? What difference does it make where the money comes from? | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/19/2009 12:37:04 PM | | ^^^ Where the money comes from is very important even more so if the woman has children.. "Dirty money " from Drug deal'n , Gambaling and so forth can be a very riskey busniess and can often get innocnet people involved, hurt and or killed.. So yes I can undersand why a woman would want to make sure a guy is making a honest living. Cus I have seen first hand how lives can be changed over dirty money. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/19/2009 2:13:47 PM | I once dated a man who tossed money around like it grew on trees. He had nice house, cars, and literally more gadgets than he could keep track of. Apart from his spendthrift ways, he was an interesting man; high school dropout but had worked his way up in the oil business to the point where he'd owned his own company.
One evening, he took my daughter and I out for dinner and a movie. We had to order appetizers, main course and desert, because we were "living it up, out for a Friday evening on the town" . . . we left that restaurant carrying six boxes of food.
I didn't want my daughter, who was maybe 13 at the time, learning those values. I ended the relationship shortly before my birthday and Christmas cause I didn't want to be in the position of having to refuse overly extravagant gifts . . . he'd been hinting about a car.
What and give up my rusty ol' 82 Prelude?!?!
I do expect that a man in my age group (50 ish) would have their career and finances in order. But obviously, having the stuff is no guarantee of maturity, financial responsibility.
There was a post way back in this thread about women's income representing a little extra cash for a couple/household. Grrrr. Apart from $200/month in child support, I have been the sole breadwinner in this household for 16 years. While the bank still owns most of this house, the car is mine and about a week from now, my daughter will graduate from university, debt free. Thank goodness for the little extra cash I was able to bring in! | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 5/19/2009 6:35:13 PM | | Well yes there are men who live with their parents, don't have a car or a job I mean seriously I can not provide all that for someone else I was not born with a silver spoon and granted times are tough but seriously fix things first. They are looking for someone who can figure out how to come in out of the rain. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 7/25/2009 3:31:48 PM | I for one would not want to bring someone into my life that has nothing to contribute. Now a days women have to watch their intrests every bit as much as any man. I have my own job, home and car. I would expect no less from my partner, unless of course he was independently wealthy. Then I would have to rethink if I wanted to give up my independance in exchange...... Nope not happening for any amount $$.
A request for a man to have a job, car and a home does not equal a gold digger. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 7/27/2009 8:30:29 AM | | Truth of the matter is that some women are indeed gold diggers; they are most often young and seeking a sugar daddy to supply them with prada, etc without working themselves. Thing is, said women can only play this game til their mid thirties, then they become washed up debutantes. The common demoninator is that such women are seeking a man who can take care of them. Some women are attracted to power and status and envelop this with a daddy complex. This is illustrated by the woman who marries a CEO, yet never realizes that she is never actually a spouse, but an accessory along with the BMW, big house, stock portfolio, etc. I've known women my age who have fallen into this, got dumped for a younger fresher model, and then have no idea how to support themselves. As sad as it is to behold, it comes down to the old saying that if you live by the sword, you die by it as well. | |
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| Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash?
Posted: 7/28/2009 11:44:43 PM | A woman truly into you would not have those must haves...she just wants you...and that's it...and she'll be happy...you can get all those things together...that's why a woman who wants to have a future with you probably wouldn't couldn't care to wait for you to get all that together...she'll marry you as is  ...if they insist on those must haves...I would questions her intentions/motives | |
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