| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 12:36:24 PM |
I totally agree there dude...Im the nicest guy around. ***holes, stalkers, and murderers give me a bad name. Youve seen how ***holes are ladies. Jerks dont give a shit about anybody but themselves. Ive got a good sense of humour, im a sweetheart, and im good looking but that doesnt help any because woman wont go for that. They want guys who will take advantage of them. To me, that doesnt make any sense..Give me a chance..
The problem is, possibly you need to get out more because there are so many different unique types of people around that are just waiting to meet you.
Just continue to be yourself. Accept yourself for who you are. Be comfortable in your own skin.
Stop worrying about what "women" want and concern yourself with what YOU want.
Sounds like you're more interested in gaining approval from women and looking to jerks as a good example. They are not. Women who love jerks love drama. That's what keeps them hooked. Do you want to deal with that? Not me.
When you meet the right woman she'll love you for who you are, not WHAT you are or what you can do for her. She'll love you for how you make her FEEL.... | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 12:42:42 PM |  Don't worry there are plenty of drug addicts, boozers, ex-and current cons, beaters and cheaters out there. You'll find someone to abuse you, take you for granted and cheat on you in no time. Just keep fishing  and you'll be bruised up with your sister knocked up and your new man locked up in no time. 
Ah ain't love grand. lol
On a serious note. Stop stalking this man. Get on some medication.
harvey | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 12:42:45 PM | your a pretty young lady best to do is move on stop thinkin of him and get a grip on ya self find someone new stay with it  dang wish i was young again i be at her door alot  | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 1:33:55 PM | | I agree with you 100% MR.Harveywallbanger.....Usually when a woman is with a jerk(EX-con,abuser,drunk,drug addict,no car/license,bum)Then she finally leaves him...The next guy she is with is just as bad if not worse....But you have people out there that do not see that.....I even had this one guy tell me women do not like jerks...Can you believe people are that stupid in the world....Well i can not control what people think...But i know the truth..I got a brain and i use it......I see waht is going on. | |
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Mule
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Joined: 1/7/2005
Msg: 30 | |
| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 2:23:09 PM | Men tell each other all the time:
"Dude, you need to stop thinkin' with Little head and start thinking with Big Head"
There is no female equivalent of that phrase
Think about that, and be deeply, deeply scared. | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 3:38:44 PM | That's right -- there is no female equivalent of that phrase. That's because apparently women go for men who are advertise their sexuality like a stage light -- in other words, they think sexually all the time. Newsflash! Who knew? This is simply psychological displacement and attracts primarily women who just can't wait to get into your pants. Isn't that what men want, anyways? So it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Project sexuality and you'll find women who want to do the nasty on the first date. This won't bring you a lasting relationship or even one that's emotionally fulfilling, but at least you can brag about the notches in your bedpost when you're in the hospital with VD.
~Aurora | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 3:43:02 PM | I think an appropriate saying would be:
Get your head out of the clouds.
or
Pull your head out of your a$$.
or
Stop being lead by your heart and open up your eyes and think.
or
Use that thing thats holding your ears up called a brain.
harvey | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 3:58:55 PM | anita_doobie,
wow...this really hits home for me!!..umm..but dont tell anyone K...cause....well..I will deny everything!!..
smiles..I did it!!...I humiliated myself, thought I was going to lose what was left of my mind..I TEXT him messages like crazy trying to figure out why he could just replace me soooo easily after telling me all along that I was his everything!!
I was driving down the QEW one day...listening to the radio...and....LAFFS...this is ridiculous so I wont go into detail...but..I realized that..This is just... silly human pride on my part!!
Things usually end when it is time for them to end and although it is tough..we gals have to keep our dignity! I still have not deleted text messages that he has sent me....but one day I will be able too. It takes time and alot of soul searching. (and we can always hope Karma will bite him in the ass)
I know...everything is easier said then done.....but another of my favorite quotes is..
" we cant help who we love, we can only wish they will love us back"
if they dont......then f*ck them!! ( I kind of added that last part)
smile sweetie.....There is nothing else for us to do...but smile!!
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 4:39:40 PM | I just wanted to add.....
I dont fall for ***holes....nor do I think men are ***holes..
I absoulutly adore them, thats why it hurts so bad sometimes!!
but dont give up on the male gender...
just because you thought the one who left was your everything..doesnt mean that there isnt a wonderful guy out there who isnt going to prove you wrong!! | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 4:49:03 PM | | OP why are you asking this question? As soon as another jerk comes along you will be all over him. Don't bother asking why or getting attention for it, just go after the next jerk and leave us good guys alone. | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 5:53:48 PM | | I agree^^^^^But what is so sad their are some people that will state that there is no pattern in this type of woman....Very few women will never give a nice guy a chance as long as the a-hole is around....They worship the ground they walk on...SORRY!!!!Witnessed it so many time in my life time to know the truth.... | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 6:55:07 PM | | I've met a ton who just can't get away from that ***hole. They cry about it but continue to go back to him. For the ladies who do it, we don't feel sorry for you, you're not getting our attention, and you get what you deserve. Like I stated OP, you will go back to him or find ANOTHER ***hole out there because you are one of those women who needs drama, sorry but true | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/24/2006 7:31:48 PM | Hello anita_doobie,
Your problem is not completely your fault. When people respond to your question with answers that hurt as much as the stated problem, they are expressing their own ignorance and impatience with people who suffer such problems. The fact is that human beings are biological machines. These machines come with a conscious state of mind as well as a subconscious mind. The subconscious mind is that part of your brain that runs sub routines in the background. The programming written to run the subconscious mind is not easily changed, if at all. Depends on the person really. In any case, the reason why women tend to be attracted to jerks, is that these men propose the possibility of producing a strong child. Typically, the women attracted to jerks are those who are good natured. It is part of our programming to spread and balance the genetic structure of mankind. This means that in order to keep balance, a good natured female will try to produce a child with a poor natured male, in an attempt to balance out the produced child. A bit of both if you will.
If a woman falls for a poor natured male, she will most likely try to stay with him at all costs, including enduring physical and psychological abuse. This is not because she wants to stay with him consciously. She 'has' to stay with him subconsciously. This is why such women do not often times make the move to escape him. They believe that in order to leave him, they must give up everything, then have nothing. Women often times need a sense of security. If this security is found in a poor natured male, they will latch on to him... often times permanently. If they do leave the male, they will most certainly be attracted to another male of the same poor qualities. I say 'male' because men of poor character are not 'men', they are simply a male. A 'man' would not disrespect a woman by treating her that way. Males that treat women that way are basically a more 'neanderthal' version of mankind. They often times think and live as an animal does, with little respect for others and their needs. This after all, is the primary separation between animals and humans. I believe your primary problem is that you are genetically geared towards mating with a male, not a man. This is why women tend to say "I just want a good man, that will love me and treat me well". Honestly? This is NOT what women typically want subconsciously. The evidence is all around you, every day. All you have to do is look. That is why they say that good men finish last. Good women do not want good men. There is no balance in that type of relationship.
You stated that you were together for love? No, I am sorry, but you were not. You felt the drive to be with him, even though you knew he was not of good character. This simply means that you were with him and continue to feel the drive to be with him, simply because your programming tells you to. I am sorry, but it was not love... it was need. People are typically in a self defense mode. They claim to want what is best for them, because they know that is not really what they want. They say it is, simply because that is what they know others would expect from them. The first step to being free from jerks... is to know thyself! Know that you will always be attracted to them. But, also know that you will not find happiness with them...ever. If you accept this, then and only then can you move on and make wiser choices. True love is felt between the very best of friends. If your lover is not your very best friend, then it is not love, it is programming.
Regarding why men wanted you when you were dating and not when you are single: This has nothing to do with you being a challenge. People that perpetuate this myth, are only fooling themselves. The fact is that long ago, humans used to mate in groups. Many animals do. This is why women that hang out together for long periods of time, begin to synchronize their periods. When one is ready to mate, they all are. If a woman is in a mating relationship, other men will want to mate with her too. When a man is in a mating relationship, other women will want him too. It is not a conscious effort or choice. It is once again... programming. Standard, run of the mill human programming. The only way to change programming is to be aware of it, then find ways around it. That is all you can do. I hope this helps you. | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/25/2006 3:52:50 PM | | Well yeah National Geographic. The species in National Geographic don't go out of their way to complicate their's and everyone else's lives. Apes are now "above" us in the dating chain. | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/25/2006 7:39:48 PM | The fact that a preponderance of women date men that mistreat them does not bode well for the survival of the human race and is a major stumbling block for off-the-cuff evolutionary psychoanalysis. I'm just freakin' sayin'...
~Aurora | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/25/2006 7:54:44 PM | Terminallycute:
Where do I get this stuff? I am an engineer. LOL... I have not seen National Geographic in some time. Hmm... maybe I should subscribe! I have been working on the human condition for about 20 years. I tend to see things for what they are, not what I want them to be. Sometimes truth hurts, but only to those who are unwilling to accept truth. Like any computer, the human programming can be changed. It is just a matter of knowing how it works first. I have developed four prototypes for experimenting with such things. I might add with a great deal of success! I know, I am odd. I accept that. But, I tell it like it is... not sugar coat it in a poor attempt to hide the truth of it. Many people may be offended by my words, but that is simply because they know it is true and they refuse to admit they are actually this way. So, it is not my words that offend them, rather it is their own inability to accept who and what they are. It is easier after all, to simply ignore it and pretend it isn't happening. Wouldn't you agree? An animal doesn't have the choice of acting like anything other than what they are. They cannot rise above their initial programming. Humans can... so what is our excuse for acting like animals? Philosophers have been struggling with this concept for centuries. What did they find? That many humans simply do not put forth any effort to be more than their animal nature. So what does this say about them? What would you conclude? By the way, I think 'tragicallycute" would be a better name for you. I am sure you are creating broken hearts all over the planet with your beauty. | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/25/2006 8:18:14 PM | Aurora73:
LOL! Think of it this way. Women that date and mate with ***holes, are actually doing mankind a favor! They are effectively adding their passive nature to that of the ***hole nature through the resulting children. In effect, they are helping to breed them out of existence. So, ***hole men should not feel like godly studs because they bag the babes. What they should be doing is running as fast as they can, as their kind is being bred out of the human genetic equation. Go get em girls!  | |
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Jemue
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Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 47 | |
| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/25/2006 8:24:21 PM | Ever wondered why there are so many jerks about and allegedly so few good guys ?
Because women go for them instantly and chase them. It's supply and demand.
More guys need to figure out that this works and then you'll be swamped. | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/25/2006 8:25:19 PM | Ladies tend to go for good looking a**holes because they like the looks and the natural nurturing/mothering instinct kicks in and they subconciously think they can shape and mould him into the perfect partner.
Talked about that in Psyc class many moons ago.
Men do similar things ... just in a different approach/way. | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/25/2006 10:14:31 PM | its sad that u don't value yourself enough to not need him.
i was in a similar situation cept it was always him calling me (i have too much pride to ever call a guy) i couldn't say no to him. lots of people might tell u to just get another guy and forget about him my advice get a big group of boys, have atleast 10 boys that call u regularly, start dating in a plural sense, if u gots other people on the go u won't need his once and awhile booty calls. women shouldn't have to call guys anyways. read the book 'hes just not that into u' and learn to have higher standards. | |
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| why do I (+ most women) love assholes??
Posted: 5/25/2006 10:27:13 PM | Aurora73 ... WTF are you doing man! ... This was one of our best kept secrets! DUDE NO!
Don't listen to him girl he doesn't know what he's talking about!
whoa! close call .. dude what were you thinking... GEEZ
In all seriousness Aurora73 is completely right. Now Sir STOP giving out our secrets! | |
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