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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 5/29/2006 12:21:45 AM | | I've had people insult me all my life for whatever reason. I try to ignore them, but it doesn't always work. I find myself retailiating a lot, but that seems to make it worse. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/3/2006 5:45:44 AM | Ultimate Insult: A man brings me all the way to Japan. I am there almost 2 months waiting for him to get back from a business trip in India. The first thing out of his mouth when he sees me, Everything in America is big isnt it? I didnt let him know he hurt me, but WTF he seen the same pictures that are on here and some personal nude ones. Its not like I was lying to him about my size. But then again, after seeing him nude, I said god, everything in India is small isnt it So, I told him send me home. The whole trip was at his expense. And I got to see some beautiful country. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/3/2006 5:58:07 AM | I always consider the source...
I dont sweat stuff like that... lifes too short... and some people are
just foolish or have issues.
Usually the best way to handle insults is to correct any misconceptions the
person may have.. then ignore them if they continue. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/3/2006 11:52:41 PM | I agree with the OP....Im trying to walk away...but recently I made an ass out of myself on a forum....buy useing my street voice.
I used to be the guy that walked away getting called a punk...
But these days...stress and all...instead of hearing all that noise...I just hit them now.
I know thats bad....im a big boy, and I knew what I was doing...but somtimes you have to stick up for yourself. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/4/2006 11:45:43 AM | "I always consider the source..."
And usually end up laughing as I walk away. I know I don't "look" like what I "am" most of the time. Recently it came up, and I told someone I don't feel the need to wear the suit and the ten tons of make up to put up an appearance for a bunch of idiots that I didn't care what they thought in the first place LOL Always cracks me up to hear all the guesses (and I get them for age, ethnicity, career, etc, and constantly and wonder why they are so frickin curious anyway) I have also noticed that a lot of idiots become completely unwrapped when you find humor in their attempts to insult.
"How do you keep an idiot in suspense?.....Tell ya' later." | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 3/12/2007 1:42:37 AM | | Usualy the insult says way more about the insulter than the insultee(is that even a word?). Anyone resorting to an insult has something they are very insecure about themselves or they have something to hide. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/9/2009 8:08:45 PM | I don't understand why would a person want to make another person feel really low about themselves at a date.
Doesn't it imply you've blown whatever chances you might have had?!
"I'm very sensitive to even implied slights, and it really has nothing to do with me personally either.
Insults just plain freak me out. They add to the data that the world is not a very nice place, all while I'm trying my damndest to pretend like it is so I can get by.It's not the person saying it.It's not if it's true or not, either has the same effect.Whether it's some stupid guy telling me I'm too fat for him to date, or seeing a couple of kids stomp to death a butterfly just for fun, it's the same thing. It feels the same way. It brings me back to the most unanswerable question about human nature"
AMEN! | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/9/2009 8:36:29 PM | i learned long ago not to let insults bother me....lol......then one dy..i came up with the perect reply:........you know, in order for an insult to have any meaning....it must come from someone of an equal, or better social standing.........and son?.[or girl]...........you dont quite measure up.
then just go about your business............usually takes a few min. for it to sink in.....lol.........but the results are great. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/9/2009 10:55:18 PM | Insults are a very interesting social "tool", if you will. They can and are used for MANY things.
PUA's use "negging" and it is VERY effective based on the reports of friends I have had, and the one time I tried it. That is an insult for the purpose of making someone LIKE you.
Insults can be used to gain a tactical advantage. Cassius Clay of immortal boxing fame would launch a barrage of insults at his opponent almost as withering as his flurry of punches. A hot-headed fighter is not a good one.
Insults can even be a joke or mark of pride: "Dude, you are such a d!ck man!"--"I know right? LMAO".
Some insults are cold and calculating, however.
These are the kind that are nasty. For example, if I observed someone posting on here about some personal physical trait and being sensetive about it, then in a week or two I messaged them saying: "Hey, I don't know you, but I can tell you one thing. (physical trait) is a major factor for a lot of women/men. With your (physical trait), I highly doubt you are going to find someone who can HONESTLY overlook it. Sure, they will say it's cool, but you know how you tell white lies? Yeah. That's what that will be. I had a friend who was in your same boat. They ended up having a drug overdose during a fit of depression when their significant other cheated on them with their roommate--who just happened to have the proper (physical trait)."
THAT is a REAL insult. A cutting, deep, insightful one designed to inflict damage, self-doubt, and a whole multitude of feelings. Not all insults are created equal.
What you have to remember is this: NOONE really knows you like you know yourself.
I am very analytical, and as such, I have my own way of dealing with being insulted:
Does this insult hold truth?
Can I use this as an opportunity to see something in me that could be improved?
Is this insult meant just to hurt, and have no substance?
Is this insult a smoke-screen for this person's TRUE feelings on me/some matter?
You will be amazed at how much you can better yourself when an angry person insults you. As a rule, people are most honest about our flaws and how they percieve them when they are making insults. Remember a bad breakup you had in the past when the X said: AND I HATE IT WHEN YOU ALWAYS *insert behavior here*!!!
Yeah, I am not perfect, I have had that happen before. I improved/changed the behavior and made myself better. Had I never been insulted, the white-lies of society would have forever conceiled the deficiency. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 12:21:51 AM | | Depends on the insult, sometimes you have to educate the ignorant, other times you have to stand up for yourself or be treated like a doormat, other times, sure ignoring some dork works best. But really, to let someone get away with bad behavior is saying it's okay. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 1:34:50 AM | You let them roll off your back by laughing them off, you cant take an insult you dont feel to be true seriously
My fat head manager was being a strunz and I wanted to kick him in the scrotum but instead I laughed at him and he kept asking why I was laughing
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OKRob
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Joined: 6/4/2009
Msg: 40 | |
| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 6:07:40 AM | Insults are more common these days because of political correctness. You can't do anything without insulting somebody.
The way you dress or the way you walk or the number of piercings you have in your face are good examples.
At the same time, people bang on about diversity awareness and being accepting of others and their situations.
It's all bull. I will just be me and if it isn't good enough for people then I am not fussed :) | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 6:12:16 AM | Do it back, but do it better.... or make some sort of statement that makes sense to you but will confuse the hell out of them.
"You f*cking b*tch!"
"I bite my thumb at you sir!" (make appropriate hand gesture).
They might think you're a moron,but you get to be all smug and superior like. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 6:21:22 AM | I question the "insulter" and challenge them. Usually by the end of the dialog they realize how ridiculous their statement was and it doesn't have any merit.
I agree with the OP....Im trying to walk away...but recently I made an ass out of myself on a forum....buy useing my street voice
I have also been caught in the heat of the moment - then I get banned. They let me back in. I have also been attacked viciously. Its part of the online world. Let it go and move on.
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 6:27:04 AM | | Meh, people should just embrace the insult and say "thanks". Don't ever let people make you feel bad about yourself | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 6:27:26 AM |
Insults can be used to gain a tactical advantage. Cassius Clay of immortal boxing fame would launch a barrage of insults at his opponent almost as withering as his flurry of punches. A hot-headed fighter is not a good one.
using his given name instead of his chosen name is an insult to Muhammad Ali... | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 6:39:48 AM | | Thanks SAGuy! Maybe if he just said Mohammed Ali we would have known who he was talking about. I guess that was to insult one's intelligence. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 10:15:26 AM | ^^^ Cat Stevens?
Depends on the insult. I'll try to refrain from getting into a "You're stupid" confrontation. People who resort to that tactic are merely out of facts to defend their argument. Insulting my family may be hazardous to their health. That type of insult is very rare, although my close friends talk smack about my mom all in good fun. That's just our way of bonding. I don't consider it an insult. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 10:16:56 AM | | An insult tells me I'm getting to someone. This usually makes me harass them more. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 10:50:37 AM | Maybe if he just said Mohammed Ali we would have known who he was talking about.
Not know Cassius Clay? Young whippersnappers
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 11:15:06 AM | the poster knows why he used Clay...and I know why he used Clay.
just like all those folk out there that call MLK...Michael King, or Barrack...Barry.
but the poster is a big boy, he can tell us why he chose Clay. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 4:28:44 PM | | When I've been insulted, for whatever reason, it's always struck a funny cord in me, I've laughed. Sometimes just a nervous, "Did he/she just say that to ME?" *crawls under a rock* laugh. Sometimes I got a true belly laugh, like I could see how "stoopit" the other person looked by throwing insults. I know that the insulter didn't mean to be funny, but the insults came off as funny and the insulter came off as moronic. But ... when I see another person insulted, or when I see harshness, coldness, meanness or shallowness towards a fellow human being or another living thing and it hurts them, I hurt for them, I don't see humor at all then. I can stand to be insulted, like I said, it makes me laugh, but I can't stand to see anyone else insulted or hurt, it hurts me. | |
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| dealing with being insulted
Posted: 7/10/2009 4:38:03 PM | The worst name I've been called made me laugh because of the story behind it. I'll try to censor it down so it won't be too offensive, but I was called this at the county jail once: "P***y @$$ cracker mother f*****".
If I got easily offended by what people say, I'd probably be pretty upset, but I actually laugher to myself at that one, because someone told me the first year they worked at the jail they thought thats what their name was. He said he thought about getting a nameplate made up with that on it. I heard that shouted across the room, word for word and just shook my head. | |
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