| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 5:52:11 PM | LOL nice ..i think this is a universal question women will lie too.. women tend to lie when its about something that will change the way things are.. where as guys will lie to avoid things ...i just ended a 13 yr relationship bout 11 months ago and in the end i got to find out about all the s*** she lied about ...haha if u ask me women are just better at not gettin caught in lies  | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 5:54:52 PM | | :P i had a point o make ..i got off track a lil i like the question though ...i think lieing is natural for some people im sure it has alot to do with circumstance i mean no one likes to admit they messed up so they lie to avoid a situation ...i think when people mess up alot they get comfortable lieing about it and it consumes relationships because your no longer thinking about not messing up your thinking more about the lies you can use to cover yourself ..just my opinion | |
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AMOFO
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Joined: 5/22/2006
Msg: 53 | |
| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 5:54:56 PM | | On the money "SAY HI TO DAVID"! If you break it down to the lowest common denominator, it is basically a process of selection (survival of the fittest). The one who presents the best overall package has the best opportunity. Thumbs up David! | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 5:56:46 PM | | I try to be true to myself but most men and women put up a front..(On thier best behavior if you will) This is living a lie as opposed to saying one!! We are considerate to feelings of ladies and want them happy while we figure out the chemistry thing!! If it is not there many would rather fade away then hurt you with words!! Personally I never say I Love You unless I am positive!! I will say I feel an attraction but to know for sure takes a little time!! Women make it easy on the users by giving it up so easily!! Purity equals respect!! Easy is just easy!! So hold the legs til the heart is sure and you will win more often than lose and have proper time to know if you have a "Love Connection". Guys be straight even if it hurts...Ladies have some self respect and dont give up your treasures to just anyone!! | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 5:58:06 PM | | Rainbow that's the truest( dont think that's a word but you get the point) sh--it I ever read. Maybe there are some girls out like that there who dont know what they want. But I know what I want and also got dumped today for it. I need a man with ballz someone who can make a decision and not lead me on while they consider there options. Guys have been known to be slower maturing then girls so maybe I should start looking for older guys. Maybe the saying should be guys are like a fine wine.LOL | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 6:00:29 PM |
most of them are the pretty boys or think they are. they speak of long term and really means how long until the sex. they post pictures without a shirt.
The way I see it myself I would tend to trust a person a lot more if that person didn't dress like an amateur poker player. You know nothing peewee. | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 6:07:07 PM | I agree with a few of you...unfortunaltely there are some women/girls who can not handle the truth...
However that being said...playing them is not the right thing to do either. I happen to know a very "good player" and we argue constantly about his treatment of women. He lies and manipulates to make himself feel better. His reason? Some chick screwed him before....
My response..." they haven't and get over it..."
I guess the bottom line is that there are men and women who like to play the game...everyone needs to watch themselves these days. | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 6:14:41 PM | A good looking guy who just wants to use a woman to get laid will win over an unattractive (physically) male looking for a meaningful relationship almost every time, so I dont usually sympathize with those same women when they get used.
*Disclaimer*
I am not saying you are one of said shallow women | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 9:00:03 PM | | i think that guys say the things that they do because they think that is what u want to hear and then they will score but guess what guys women arent that stupid and we can usually figure it out, because guys seem to screw up one way or the other | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 9:00:17 PM | | i think that guys say the things that they do because they think that is what u want to hear and then they will score but guess what guys women arent that stupid and we can usually figure it out, because guys seem to screw up one way or the other | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/12/2006 9:53:51 PM | Maybe the prospect of a desired realtionship with a seeming match can cloud our better judgement? Words can be misleading, misinterpreted, mistaken. Actions that matter, the ones that show the core characteristics, are usually very truthful.
So, it is laid out. Just not honestly. Why do these things come with smoke and mirrors? | |
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| Why can't a woman just lay it out honestly :dispute:
Posted: 6/15/2006 4:58:07 AM | Farking hell.. Women have been the culprets of this for centuries..
and now there are women on here calling guys cowards...
So if the male version is a coward, what is a female version then, a Skank!!!
Not all women do this but I have seen plenty do this.. Actually in the last 10 years
the women have been worse at it than us guys..
Cultures a pearl, to find it is all done with mirrors..  | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 5:09:19 AM | Seriously, we all know intimacy is very important to a relationship.
But there are men who just want to F$^k.
These men should be straight up, there are lots of girls who are just the same. Find each other.
Leave the rest of us to choose and not think otherwise about you.
Hence, no confusion. No misleading hopes, and broken hearts.
Oh but please be forwarned! Some people don't understand NO!
No matter what you tell them!  | |
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Dru
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Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 67 | |
| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 6:27:26 AM | Umm okay, I can be a bit of a slut when I want to. Not meaning I've been with a ton of girls, but if I'm single and see something I want, even though I don't know her, I'll go after her for just sex.
But at some point before the clothes come off I tell her thats all I'm looking for. I just want to have some fun then go home. Most of the time they are actually okay with that, and love the fact that I was honest with them, some start to laugh because they were planning on ****ing and chucking me lol. Of course some women get really offended, others appreciate the honesty but say no thanks they want it all or nothing.
I totally respect whatever their decision is after I tell them. But you would be surprised how being honest can turn a girl on. Especially when you tell her your gonna use her like a piece of meat, get what you came for and leave. Some women get turned on by that. | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 6:35:40 AM | depending who you're dealing with
telling it like it is = single
if you're refering to more of a one night stand kind of thing, make the person go on a few dates with you first | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 6:38:58 AM | You hit the nail on the head Dru! Exactly correct.
I may not be into the one night stand thing but I sure love the honesty.
I have way more respect for a man that will be straight up about it then one who is sneaky about it.
Another bonus to honesty is, we can both move on and not get hurt or hurt anyone else.
And from now on when I see you I will smile and maybe give you a hint about what girls are interested in the same thing.
Insider information.
Let me clarify, I am not one of those girls. | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 6:45:56 AM | I for the most part will tell a woman what I want soon after I get to know her a little bit better but if I told a woman I want sex they'd be turned away from me. But women lie too. Make up-her face really doesnt look like that.....heels-she's not that tall....and certain jeans can change the way a womans booty looks....besides, just because a man wants you for sex and nothing else doesnt mean he's a coward, he just doesnt think YOU'RE special. 
Church. | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 7:21:37 AM | Both sexes are to blame for this stereo type and seemingly first judgement against the opposite sex. Mistrust at the beginning of any kind of relationship is like a salmon swimming up a waterfall...sure, they can do it..but do you know why they do it?
Being false for anything is a waste of time IMO. Be true to yourself, accept who you are and others will recognize that and respond...even the psychos =p
As far as head games go...i will never understand it.
In my youth I used to beat the shyte out of Drug dealers and Pimps and back then my view of Players (anyone seems to find enjoyment out of hurting others in any way) was on par with Dealers and Pimps.
I would apologize if this offended anyone...if I were sorry. | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 7:37:48 AM | Well I can only speak from personal experience. For one thing, here on POF, my desires change almost daily. When I first joined I just was looking for a woman who wanted wild monkey sex. Well, after finding out my chances of that happening were slim to none, I changed to looking for someone to date… Now, it varies. When things are going good with my relationships, I think about maybe even giving up my membership in the “Never again” club and even think of going Long Term. And then something will happen and I will say to heck with it, Intimate Encounters or finding a FB is all I want.
Why didn't I join one of the "Just want sex" dating sites? Because I do not have a credit card and without one, you are dead in the water. So... no other choice...
If someone posts on here what they actually want, and what they want is not the standard “Dating”, “Friends”, “Long Term Relationship” that most want, they are NOT going to get any responses. I mean, I read all the posts where people are looking for FwB, or FB’s, or “Intimate Encounters” and get attacked almost viciously. I mean how many of you women would respond to someone just wanting a FB or Fwb or Intimate Encounter? Not many I would wager…
So of course the person is going to “hide” his actual desires from the women he contacts. All he has to do is “play” her game, tell her what she wants to hear, and hope it will lead to the bedroom.
The reason I changed what I was looking for was when I did a search for women looking for Intimate Encounters within a 100 miles of where I live. I found 10 women. I did a search for men wanting the same thing and got 19 pages or roughly about 380. So that means each woman has 38 guys wanting to do the wild thing with her… Not good odds.
Any wonder guys lie their rear off….They are forced to...
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 8:35:38 AM | In my humble opinion what also happens is that what we say can be very clear "I am just interested in dating right now but let's see how it goes as we get to know each other" but it get heard as "I am really into you and want to move this relationship towards marriage". Most guys are pretty straight forward try just hearing what we say and don't read anything more into it.
Also one of the reasons men don't lay out of their feelings is that too many women once they find out you are really into them, run for the next challenge. After having this happen to me too many times I revert to the above quote of dating. Honesty is a two way street but what happens too often is that both say they are being honest but only one really is. That is what makes it harder to open up in the next relationship. | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 8:39:43 AM |
Just wanted to understand why a man can't just say it like it is Hey just want to have some fun then you would know what to expect.....Don't lead on someone who is expecting a little more substance?
The eternal question asked again and again and again and again with the same response again and again and again and again. Here, let me put it in bold face so you can't miss it:
What is the chance a man will get what he wants if all he wants is "some fun" and admits to it?
If you are honest you know the answer already, if you are not join the rest of the man-bashing crowd for some feel-good... well... man-bashing...
The task is to be able to tell before hand what a man wants, not after spending time and effort. It's not very hard, only the illusions are in the way... | |
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| Why can't a man just lay it out honestly...
Posted: 6/15/2006 8:41:50 AM | | Its been my experience that most men do lay it out honestly when it comes to what theyre looking for.I take things a man tells me at face value.On numerous occasions from what Ive seen with my friends and in the forums ,a man will tell a woman "Im not ready for anything serious","I never want to get married" ect She interprets that as,"if I wait around long enough hell come around" When a man says,I dont want to date you but FWB works" A woman sometimes thinks,"If I wait around long enough hell come around" .LOL Sometimes men do manipulate to get what they want and say they love you when they dont to get sex ect,but its pretty rare.Most men tell it like it is and then some women waste their time with the whole"what does it mean" when its glaringly obvious.JMHO:) | |
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