| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/29/2006 5:05:05 PM | | kayakchic, maybe this loner found you odd, and in his judgemental way, he went home to his computer, found an on-line forum and started a thread about you. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/29/2006 5:27:53 PM | | I'm not really sure why you made a thread about this guy. I think your the odd one. What's wrong with living your life alone? Maybe the question you should ask yourself is WHY do you seek so much attention in life? | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 2:53:05 AM | Another example of why life is not like TV.
I am someone who falls into this loner catergory.
I don't ever expect to get married, I have friends, and I have had lovers, but they always seem to move on or drift apart.
I have a life plan, and I have made that plan on the assumption that I will be singe all my life.
I am perfectly happy with it. I am not crying or complaining cos I sleep alone at night, I spread out and enjoy the whole bed.
Not having a signifigant other isn't the end of the world, there is more to life than sex and dating. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 7:01:59 AM | Kyakchick
Take a cruise through the broken hearts section
Relationship break ups marriages in chaos, or destroyed. Domestic violence everywhere.
A happy marriage is fine but it's a reall gamble and one that it increasingly hard to find.
And going it alone is certainly better, and happier than any sort of dud relationship. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 8:44:27 AM | | NOthing odd about that at all I can count tons of men I know like that and women too who just like being alone and single and are very happy. Me I like company :) | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 12:42:50 PM | | I'm usually a loner and am usually happy with simple dating, still though, once in a while you meet a great woman and realize how enjoyable her company can be. Not just in the bedroom either. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 2:17:09 PM | | I personally am a bit of a loner when it comes to living arrangements....I hate sharing my personal space for any length of time with a man. I don't like traditional relationships much either, but engage in them from time to time. The only people that I can tolerate full time in my life are my cats and technically they aren't people lol...I think there are alot of us loner types out there, you just don't hear about us much :) A wise ex lover of mine once made the comment..."it's better to be alone than to be with the wrong person" and I think it's a good rule of thumb when it comes to life. So many people are soooooo desperate just to have someone, that they take whatever comes their way...they might never give themselves a chance to see if they can grow to enjoy being alone. Being alone with no attachments is the best way to be in my opinion, it's nice to have your options open, to go where you want, when you want, with whomever you want (or maybe alone!) | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 3:03:20 PM | | nope not odd at all.. just someone that knows what he wants outta life.. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 3:15:54 PM | | I hadn't really thought of myself as a loner ~ even when I was continuously called that. Older and wiser, I now agree. I have been married and he was gone often for fairly long periods of time ~ it worked. I got the best of both worlds. Now that I'm older, it seems unlikely that I will find someone who is willing to adjust to my need for insane amounts of alone time. One the other hand, maybe with my son now an adult and my life less stressful ~ I might be able to tolerate constant contact with someone. I have yet to meet that person, but it may be a possibility. Highly unlikely ~ but it's a nice fantasy!! | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 4:06:34 PM | "Some people choose the lonely life of celibacy... Others... others have it thrust upon us"
One of my favorite Quotes from "The Simpsons"
Maybe this guy is just the former. It's certainly more common to find people who live alone because they haven't found a partner than it is to find people to simply choose not to form intimate relationships, but they do exist. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 6:38:09 PM | Im like that too a bit. I'd never get married or live with someone (not right now at least).
I much rather prefer having my own place & having alone time. | |
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Zain.
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Joined: 9/20/2005
Msg: 39 | |
| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/30/2006 6:55:22 PM | | Nothing wrong with living your life the way you see fit. I'm quite the loner myself, I'm a private person I just need my space. I'm also quite selective over who I choose to be friends with. However, I'm not to the extreme of the person the OP mentioned I do want to have a girlfriend get married etc. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/31/2006 2:32:37 PM | I am what you would probably call a loner. I've never had a girl friend in high school because I was too busy dealing with my learning disability. It hinders me a great deal in situations where I have to do a non-verbal (speaking/comunication) task, like flirting in a bar.
I was too busy getting assignments and essays done throughout my scolastic carreer to focus on my love life.
I find myself staying at home and not pursing a social life because I'm a twenty eight year old guy who has never been on a date before. I'm always stuck being the friend, or discover that the woman I am attracted to isn't into me the way I'm into her, or is a lesbian.
No offence to lesibans.
But seriously, what self respecting woman wants a man who hasn't been up to bat in his life.
Where would I start. I've got no real confidence to speak of, so I might as well be a loner.
I guess its not so bad though. Look at the divorce rate, look at how many people are actually miserable in their relationships with other people. What makes being with someone so cool, besides the fact that you've got someone to eat with, have sex with, and go to the movies with.
I rambled but hey, I like to talk.
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/31/2006 3:08:04 PM | | The Simpson quote was good: others have it thrust upon us. The path to being a loner can be a long one. You don't even realise your on it until you get up some morning, notice once again that there is no one sleeping beside you, and your thankful there isn't. Either that or I just never really liked people all along. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/31/2006 4:07:25 PM | | Me I guess these days I might be a loner. I like the fact I dont have to be there emotionaly for anyone else, and I can do what I want to do when I want to do it. On the other hand I miss physical contact, I would be with someone if we clicked but alone is fine too | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/31/2006 5:17:33 PM | I suppose most people would consider me a loner. I am pretty quiet and do many things on my own. I prefer small groups and one on one interactions. I've never been married and wouldn't live with someone without marriage.
If I found someone, it would be great, but being by myself is pretty good too.
Tina | |
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toyoux
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Joined: 5/28/2006
Msg: 44 | |
| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/31/2006 5:24:07 PM | Red: I thank you for your effort..............
Please go away............. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 5/31/2006 6:00:51 PM | they're ASEXUAL.
meaning the hormones that drive you and me aren't that active in them.
There's many people who are asexual and will never seek a partner/dates.
They're perfectly happy. They even have group meetings, etc. yadda yadda.
Nothing wrong with him | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 6/1/2006 11:07:40 AM | | Guess I'm another one of them. Even though I miss and want a realtionship, I want it my way because I have a strong need for alone time. I can get pretty cranky without it. I'm sure I will never re-marry or live with anyone again, but I do miss the closeness and affection. And, hey, is there any man worth keeping the house spotless for 24/7? Just kidding... | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 6/1/2006 11:27:27 AM | | h$ll I've been called a drifter lol . That's like a loner that likes too travel . I don't mind sharing space with some humans others I can't stand the sound of their breathing . It's not my fault that most people can't do anything right !!!!!!lol | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 6/1/2006 11:43:28 AM | It happens...
I have many friends who are not married at age 45 and over. Nice looking guys that had bad luck with women. It happens. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 6/1/2006 12:00:10 PM | Seems like a lot of people have this in common. I think some people are just born that way, others develop mental illnesses that hinder personal relationships, others have gotten tired of relationships with others and the obligations that go with it, and have chosen to leave the game.
Personally, the way I was raised, in a very religious home, with a very religious extended family, always surrounded by like minded church going people; the only purpose in life, as told to me, and as examples that I saw, was that women, get married, have babies, and go to church. That's life, that's all there is.
Then when this life is over, supposedly the party starts, in heaven, or a new world, with all the good people, and life will be "perfect".
Even at 5 years old, I could tell this didn't make any sort of sense. I felt like I was born with a job to do.
We moved just about every year growing up, so I never formed many good friendships. Then my younger sister was born almost a decade after me, and she became my responsibility, because my parents worked too much. So at 10, I was a parent until I was 16 and was on my own, spent a year wandering the world then got saddled with an abusive relationship, then had my own child, still kept moving around.
I've been in and out of more relationships than I care to admit. I strongly doubt I'll ever find the right person, or get married.
All I've ever wanted from the opposite sex, is to not question the person I am, be able to care for yourself, be kind to me as I am to them, and some regular sex.
So far, as much as people let on that relationships and men/women are so complicated and they want something simple, No one can deliver the simple, they can't let things just "be".
I'm a loner because I strive for stability. The only times I've ever felt peace was when I was by myself, without anyone else imposing themselves upon me, because everyone wants something, all the time.
I care for a lot of people, I probably give of myself and help too much, because again, that's just my job, that's my obligation, it's the right thing to do, and I guess every once in a while someone treats me the same.
Perhaps it's just something that goes on in my head, but I see this life, this reality as an annoying persistant thing, and am greatly looking forward to when I'm older, can make a little house out in the woods, and be by myself, with maybe some fine looking lumberjack that comes by once in a while. | |
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| Loners - what gives ?
Posted: 6/1/2006 10:22:06 PM |
Apparently he sits on the couch for 5 to 7 hours at a time .. doing nothing .. not watching tv not reading .. just stares off's and reflects ...
Sounds like quite a deep depression to me. | |
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