| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:34:59 PM | you know. A girlfriend (a friend thats a girl for those who lack intelligence) has 2 children that are from 2 different dads. One is from when she got pregnant in high school at 18 whom was her first partner and they were togeather since 8th grade, well he wanted an abortion she wouldnt and when she was 5mths pregnant he left and hasnt ever showed up or a card. THEN she went on with school and didnt date until she met an amazing man whom she ended up married to for 5 yrs and they had a son togeather but divorced because he made a stupid decision to cheat with her friend of many years. Thus leaves a woman w 2 children.. Everone has their own stories but what I dont get is why everybody these days are still so quick to throw judgment of anyone.
We all have something in our lives that are embarssing or some sort of skelton hidden. She knows statistics and because of the way society or men in general has set this image of a single mother, she now doesnt date or even think of it. Thanks guys... and she is very pretty, good career, great mother. But all the men are missing out becaue of the ignorant comments like these from yall!! So actually, sorry about YOUR luck guys! | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/13/2007 9:19:34 PM | I know a woman who has four kids by four different men. They're all two years apart.  | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/13/2007 9:32:57 PM | Well seeing as I have 2 kids 11 years apart with 2 diffrent moms I hope not many people think thats alot of baggage in my mind its no diffrent then someone with 2 kids by the same person its still 2 kids.
JC | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/13/2007 9:36:21 PM |
Everyone has baggage regardless of it being kids or past relationships. I notice you have children as well. And not all single parents are looking to find a replacement for their child's missing parent. Give her the benefit of the doubt. Good luck
I never understood that statement. Children come first, no? So then, if she wants a long term relationship then would not this man have to accept her kids and treat them as his own? What other options are there? I'm sorry but this whole "not looking for a replacement dad" is BS. Any serious boyfriend will, in effect, be a second dad. | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/13/2007 9:48:02 PM | | While not giving any credibility to the original poster's question; it gave me the opportunity to mention that some of the most real, sincere, and honest women I've met have had kids. Even though their kids came first, they had more heart left over than most women. It wasn't some kind of desperation to land a man, it was sincere emotion depth. His comment is food for thought ie; Is the term "shallow on multiple levels" an oxymoron? | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/13/2007 10:17:52 PM | Hi chef,
I have always had my head on straight as I have been a hardworking person who bettered
herself with higher education and now I am a professional. For some reason, it seems men give me hell for choosing not to get married or choosing not to get pregnant ! I say life is about the choices we make and there is nothing wrong with being cautious rather being impulsive. After all ,we only have one life, and we all should think before we leap.
I have cousin who is the same age as me age 42, she has 8 kids by 8 different men and she lives in California when back in the 1980s and early 1990s she collected lots of welfare checks. My cousin was very seedy because the first guy she got pregnant with when she was 19 years old and she did not know the guy's last name !
I say be careful, this lady you are interested in sounds like she could be irresponsible and you could be the the father of her third child ! There are more women out there that have their act put together and who are child free so why don't you just go fishing for some !
This lady sounds like bad news!  I refused to date a guy on this POF dating site because he had 3 kids by 3 different women because he was a loser ! I asked him why he did not use a condom or ask the women if they had any birth control? His response was :"He did not think of it because he was having a good time!" That is a loser who is irresponsible and I feel sorry for the children! | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/13/2007 10:30:14 PM | this only means that she has had 2 relationships with men whose sperm had a sense of direction
too bad daddy #2's sense of purpose doesn't
this shouldn't deter you if you are really interested in getting to know her
if you think, she is eay because she has 2 kids from 2 different dads, cut the woman a break and be casual with women who do not have responsibilities they are juggling to get with you | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/13/2007 10:31:07 PM | | So what! If shes a nice girl, what the hell difference does it make...Dont judge her for the past....Im sure shes happy with her kids and doesnt want to be judged...In this day and age, WHO GIVES A RIP....NO ONE IS PERFECT | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 8/15/2007 9:52:48 AM | Every situation is unique but i would step back and try to see the whole picture.Kids are great whether they are yours are someone elses so i wouldn't run just because she has 2 children.With that being said i personally know of a woman who has five kids with four men.She has never held a job of any kind but does very well collecting child support from all four men.I know one of the fathers and if the money is not like clock work on time she is very unforgiving and makes life miserable for him.He has ten more years to pay but only if his son graduates on schedule if not he has to continue paying.I f you really care for this woman and she has two children just treat her kids nice and be a good role model for them.Just remember the kids didn't ask for the situation they are in and consider having a vasectomy done. | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 9/20/2007 6:21:22 AM | | What is wrong with some of you people. Yes she may have two children to two different men two men she may have loved dearly in her life. None of us know her circumstances do we? Nor is it any of out buisness. For all we know she may have been abused or cheated on and that is why she is single today. We all are here for a reason and that is to find true happiness. if someone who has children or children to multiple partners is not for you then move on and look at the next profile. No one is on here to be critisized. THOU SHALT NOT JUDGE do we remember this. I am sure not all of our houses are pure??????? are they?:modhammer: | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 9/20/2007 5:11:42 PM | In an ideal world we'd all meet the partner of our dreams, theyd be the person we married , slept with on our weddin night and stayed with forever producin a family and bein happy.
However i have no concept of this 'perfect' life!
My friend was married , he cheated and left her with a child.
She was young and later remarried havin 2 further children truely believin he was the one.
They were married years when once again this husband ran off and got her mate pregnant.
it doesnt mate her loose, she was married even. She didnt expect to be raisin 3 kids on her own and shes first to admit that if she'd have known wat would happen she wouldnt hve done it though loves her kids now they here.
She now has a partner who lives with her and her kids and he got a daughter and everyone gets on. Her kids see there dads, but her current partner is like a dad to them and great mates with them. Everyone appears to be happy and my mte is about to marry once again. lol x | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 9/20/2007 5:32:54 PM | Depends on what makes you happy as well. I see nothing wrong here, just take a chance if ya want. All I can say is... even the best make mistakes.
I have 3 kids, wasn't looking for a daddy when I was single, my daughters dad was never in the pic, still isn't & she's 30y w/ her own 2 kids now!! | |
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cbm212
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Joined: 9/9/2007
Msg: 163 | |
| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 9/20/2007 5:46:08 PM | | If you think she is really cool....then what is the problem. Someone pointed out in there post you also have kids. If you like her and she likes you that should be all that matters. My opinion is go for it . Its your life you have to do what makes you happy.I see no reason you can't be in a serious relationship with her. | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 9/20/2007 11:53:06 PM | | I've got 3 boys by 2 different dads but that doesn't mean I can't love less then someone who has no kids or 3 kids by 1 dad...does it? I dont' think so. | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 11/12/2007 9:51:40 AM | | Loved your comment thanks to all of us that do become strong independent women we know what we are made of. | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 11/12/2007 10:46:31 AM |
Everyone has baggage regardless of it being kids or past relationships.
Uhmmm, no not everyone actually.
From my point of view, I tend to agree with what Daisie and TigerWoods said on Page 1 of this topic. I'm continually amazed at the poor judgements made by women these days. I'm not saying it makes you a bad person to have made poor judgements, but from my point of view it makes you somebody I wouldn't be comfortable dating which totally suxs most days. 
I have a friend who had 3 children with 3 different men. The last little girl's father was a convicted drug dealer who left her pregnant and was never heard from again. She showed me her wedding photos, and this guy was covered with tattoos all over his arms and just looked like a real "catch" I swear. 
Father to her 2nd child was so physically abusive that she had to move into a shelter with her 1st child while pregnant with the 2nd one... which she put up for adoption when born so that the child's father could never find the child.
Father to her 1st child wasn't ready for a family and they broke up while she was pregant with that 1. Hmmm, never thought about it before but evidentally not 1 single father to her children was around for the birth of said child.
I like her, I've helped her move out of more than 1 abusive boyfriend's apartment in the last 4 years, but I could never date her. I'd never be able to deal with the baggage she brings to a relationship, which really suxs IMHO. (sigh)
IMO, when a woman has a child with Mr. Wrong she's screwing over a Mr. Right somewhere. 
At one point I would like to have had a family and children with the right woman, but I'm not and have never been ready for an "insta-family". Which is unfortunately a huge problem now that most women in my age range have already had children with Mr. Wrong.
ps. I have pets, and on several occassions when single mom's have asked me if I had children I've said "Yes, 14 in fact". You should have seen how fast these gals ran! Most, 9 out of 10 I'd estimate, don't bother to ask what kind of children I have... hehehe! 
- Michael | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 11/12/2007 10:58:48 AM | | I'd be VERY wary of a woman who has had two or more children by men she wasn't married to. It could well be the case that she deliberately arranges to get pregnant,without the knowledge of the father, in order to collect child support payments from him. Personally, I would run like the wind from such a woman. And I would NEVER believe her if she said she was on the pill or couldn't get pregnant for any other reason. | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 11/12/2007 11:02:39 AM | To BigINVT on page 1,
"why is it that women have to close there legs? why cant men cover it. it shouldnt be up to the women only."
Uhmm, because it's the women that get pregnant and not the men. Hello??? In most cases the guy walks away scott free to find yet more single women to knock up. 
- Michael | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 2/1/2008 1:02:47 AM | | i agree with truenorth...his ex sounds like me..i was married to an insecure abusive man..then had a relationship with a Tongan..he wanted to party so i told him to go ...thats after i had our son Tys...it is just circumstance...do u think i wanted all that to happen to me NOOOOO, i didnt. I know some women dont care..but i did and i will have to live with this for the rest of my life..but u know what at least i have 2 gorgeous kids out of this lesson | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 2/1/2008 2:19:41 AM | You seriously need to do some growing up!! Kids are not baggage, they are a part of her, and if you liked her enough, then you would'nt even need to question it!
Serenity~ | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 2/1/2008 2:28:00 AM | | buddy,wake up to yourself.if your thinking like that,leave this cool and very pretty woman alone.she,s a package deal,i have two kids to diffrent mum,s.so what if the kids are 6 yrs apart.what are you trying to say about her by mentioning that?are you a good male role figure or not?you sound like a very judgeamental person to me and what makes you think she wants something serious or casual with you anyway?do you think because she has 2 kids to diffrent men ,she is a easy lay.is that what you mean by casual?step up and be a man or get back with the boys....my advice to you,leave her alone.if any woman judged me cause i have 2 delightful kids to diffrent woman,i don,t need her in mine and especially my childrens life,s,she,s doing it hard with 2 kids already she don,t need another child around. | |
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Älska
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Joined: 12/3/2007
Msg: 172 | |
| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 2/1/2008 3:04:13 AM | First of all, children are NEVER baggage. They are part and parcel of who this woman is and have no doubt that they will come before any man who happens to walk into her life.
Secondly, if she says she doesn't want a father for her kids, why don't you believe her? Has it never occurred to you that she could be looking for a guy for herself and not as a substitute Dad?
does that seem like a lot of baggage to you?
she says she is not looking for a father for her youngest one but i dont see how she is not if the dad is not around like he should be. | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 2/1/2008 3:08:28 AM | | so would it be a problem is the children had the same father rather than different ones? I mean what difference does it make who fathered the childern. you either like the woman or you don't. the matter of paternatiy shouldn't enter in to it at all. | |
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| she has 2 kids 2 dif dads
Posted: 2/1/2008 3:28:40 AM | Put yourself in her shoes. What if YOU had kids with different mom? Would that disqualify you? If she cared so much for you, I doubt that she would even think about that. You know, this isnt about you, if it is then dont bother. Also, imagine yourself in the eyes of the kids. If you are in this woman's life, you are in these kid's lives as well. I think its more the fact that she has kids, rather than the fact that there are 2 dads. Do the kids a favor and move on, but if this girl is truly the one, then so are the kids. Whatever you do, don't make her "a woman with 3 kids and 3 different dads.
Also, I hate the word "chick", in my opinion thats degrading! "She's a womoan, whoa whoa she's a lady.....talking about the little lady, and the lady's mine"
Regards.......
Just Dave | |
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