jm0405
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Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 301 | |
| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/12/2009 9:58:59 AM | | A man after 40 - what do I look for? A man past his mid life crisis, past the phase in life of cheating and playing the field. Oats have been sewn. Younger men dwell longer on their ex's and recent break ups. I enjoy the fact that older men get over it in a timelier fashion - with maturity, class and style - not resorting to the level of stalking, playing games, destroying the "**** that left" - like young men do. A woman can finally have an ADULT relationship with men over 40 who know what they want and can be appreciative of people that come their way versus taking advantage of them! | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/12/2009 10:07:45 AM | I want the man on the Harley!!!!
I don't need a man to "rescue me". I want a man to understand me, accept me, take me out to dinner and be my sounding board, as I am all of this for him.
Women need men to be partners in a real relationship...not only when it suits them. Men and women have to realize that we are not your ex...stop comparing us to them. | |
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*Don*
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Joined: 1/30/2009
Msg: 303 | |
| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/12/2009 10:24:20 AM | I think what you say Mr. Beemer {msg. 292} might be true about the more shallow women in the world. The same can be said about both sexes, I’m afraid – shallowness doesn’t discriminate by gender. But what I’ve found mostly that women over 40 are looking for in a man – the women who are pleasant to date, that is – is a man that will notice a woman’s needs, wants, wishes, goals and desires, and see them as equally important as his own are. I think a more mature woman looks for a man who is confident and secure in himself and not threatened by a woman who is the same. I haven’t noticed that most women desire men with vast riches and toys, as this usually means that they are so tied to their employment to support this lifestyle that they don’t have time to devote to a relationship. There is a wish for the man to be self-sufficient, confident, and have a life with direction and purpose, but not to the extent of not having time for someone else in their life. And most of all, women over 40 years of age want to know that a man does not feel threatened when they have all those same things themselves.
Just my opinion, of course, from what I’ve seen …
D | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/12/2009 12:29:41 PM | I like some of the replys on this subject.I'm 46 and will not date guys under 45.All my life had younger guys liking me. I dont like it and wont date younger guys just not my preference at all.
I like a man who is well settled ready to move on in his life.Honest caring tactile. Can talk and listen has good manners.Enjoys quaility time and quiet time.A mans man one who dosant spend his life swearing and all his time at his job.
I have stated on my profile in fair detail what I want and will not be rushed pushed or otherwise. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/12/2009 3:48:15 PM | I look for mental/emotional maturity.
Someone who is past the petty arguments.
Someone who has been somewhat of a success in his life. Big fish in a little pond is OK.
Someone who has enough self pride to keep his body in as good a shape as he can - consering the wear and tear of time.
He should be neat about his personal grooming; showers and clean clothes and
Do his own laundry.
He should do his share of the housekeeping without being asked.
Someone who has an active mind and is curious about things in the world.
If he is content to watch TV all day and half the night, I would consider him a "dead head" and would not find him interesting at all. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/12/2009 8:59:07 PM | Yes thats interestng isn't it? I actually make more then most (professionals) I own my own business. And even in this economy I still work. I have a proffessional liscense from a moped to driver a big truck pulling tankers or triple trailers.. I just posted my own oberservation...By the way that yuppie who spent $25 large on that Harley yea ok ,read the Wall Street Journal. And if the ladies were truly honest on that house you own how many got it in the divorce settlement? Plus the child support? At least be honest., I don't complain about my ex she got the house..And in truth I really didn't want to see my stepson rooted out and have to live in a bad area. So what? It is only money. I let her have it . Didn't lose to much and I get to keep in contact with the kid. It just seems like being a good person, putting a kids best interest first seems to have come back on me in the dating scene.
And yes men can be gold digging flakes too. I have seen it. But this question was for the ladies | |
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mp2314
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Joined: 1/15/2009
Msg: 308 | |
| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/13/2009 10:34:20 PM | Intelligence, couth, content, humor, an appealing sexuality, tolerance, energy, insight, interest; yes, substantial aren’t they? But, I’ve walked away from such perfection and have had found contentment (for periods) with less. The deciding factor has often been whether he’s self-possessed, tolerant of others, values a female as “people”, and whether or not he can remember who he’s with.
To msg 57: Sure, if he can pass muster with my own first four. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 7:55:21 AM | | At 17 a friend, at 25 a friend, at 35 a friend, you all know where this going so I don't need to continue. At any age you look for someone to relate to on the same level. A friend!!! Hopefully your best friend. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 8:27:55 AM | And if the ladies were truly honest on that house you own how many got it in the divorce settlement? Plus the child support? At least be honest
What do I look for in a man after 40 years of age? One who doesn't think the way this poster does!  | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 10:09:52 AM |
....a more mature woman looks for a man who is confident and secure in himself and not threatened by a woman who is the same. ...... There is a wish for the man to be self-sufficient, confident, and have a life with direction and purpose, but not to the extent of not having time for someone else in their life. And most of all, women over 40 years of age want to know that a man does not feel threatened when they have all those same things themselves.
I agree with this. I like a man who is very intelligent and not threatened by a womena's intelligence; in fact, finds it appealing and even sexy. A man who has his own life and own interests, wants to share them and share mine with me so that we complement and enrich each other's lives.
I want a man who is my equal and who wants a best friend and companion as well as a lover. I want a very passionate lover, however. Most importantly is perspective...an open mind, someone who is still enjoys learning and experiencing....one thing I have come up against in talking to older men is an inflexibility of mind, as if they are just finished: they've done everything, thought about everything and made all their decisions about everything. I also don't want a partner who looks at life as if after 50 means downhill, slowing down, turning a corner toward old age. I am still on course as I have always been and need a partner who is the same.
And most of all, a man who truly likes women!!
And if the ladies were truly honest on that house you own how many got it in the divorce settlement? Plus the child support? At least be honest
What do I look for in a man after 40 years of age? One who doesn't think the way this poster does!
I so agree moonchild!! | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 3:01:44 PM | ismene1, you are absolutely right, and you just described my perfect partner!
Sorry to disappoint you beemer, but quite a few of us bought our OWN houses with money we earned ourselves.... Some of us walked away with our self respect and considered it a bargain. Judging every woman (or every man) based on a small sampling is closed minded at best. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 6:32:33 PM | What do I look for in a man after 40 years of age? One who doesn't think the way this poster does!
...........................................................................................................................
Must of hit a truth there huh?  I just put down what I have observed
If the shoe fits where it, if the truth hurts bear it...That poster proved my point. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 6:35:15 PM | I loved your answer, Celtic Wench.
I've never married...because I know how and when to say, "no."
What I have or don't have is my own. I've worked for every scrap of it.
We're out here.
Strong, independent women who are seeking a companion.
If you can laugh, make conversation and have good hygiene...that means you take a bath and can be presentable in public and in private...I think you have a good chance of meeting your match...or at least having dinner. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 6:38:09 PM | ^^^Um Mr. Beemer?
Yes, I would have to agree with your last statement. You did hit a nerve so to speak! You made a generalization that was most unfair! I supported my ex for 19 years! I bought him out, have upgraded my home and have supported two children for 5 years with no help from anyone! Your assumption peed me off to be honest, much the same as if I was to make an assumption about all men being eejits or players! One should tread lightly when making a generalized comment as the "shoe" doesn't fit everyone!
OT: I want a man with maturity, one who has learned from life, yet doesn't let the past keep him from enjoying what the future has to offer. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 7:01:14 PM | I look for intelligence, confidence, manners, health, fitness, conservative old fashioned values, good conversation, ability to get out and have fun or stay in and have more fun! No whiners! No show offs! No slobs!
I look for a person who can match my energy, intelligence, life-style, interests and/or add to them in positive ways. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 7:05:58 PM | every woman is different, just like men are different. it doesn't matter what age. i want the same now, that i did back then. only i want him older and smarter and more "together"-- given he has learned from life's lessons. for me, he needs a certain level of intelligence, humor, kindness and ability to partner. he needs to be touchy feeley. i don't like "cold" men. i need to know he is attracted to me and i do tend to go for a bit of macho, but not sexist. i guess a little higher testosterone will balance off my estrogen replacement hormones! 
we all have these accumulated pictures in our head of what has attracted us in the past. for some, it's one image and for some it's another. for some, it's a smell. eg: just wore a perfume that two men in a row said they hated. then along came the next man. took out the bottle, having so offended the first two, and asked him to smell it first. he asked me to put it on! who knows what memory evoked what in each person. maybe two just had allergies. some things you can keep in a bottle and whip out. other things are attached to you physically and personalitywise and they are what they are. that is why you need to keep chugging! for me, i look for friends first. the rest will sort itself out or not. most of my friends remain just friends. time will tell. i am one who does not believe in chemistry at first sight. or, if it happens that quickly , i wait to see if it lasts. i also tend to communicate what i can or cannot tolerate. again, eg: i am allergic to some perfumes, just not my own. so, if something can be changed, i just ask politely and proceed with what's important. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 7:53:28 PM | Noticed there was no "dating after 70". What do they look for? Possibly your health, bank account, what you will leave them when you kick the bucket and who has control.
And if you are a widower be prepared for them to re-decorate your house! Bitter? No, just a little older and wiser. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 8:25:30 PM |
...quite a few of us bought our OWN houses with money we earned ourselves... *raising hand* Count me in that.
I can't do the "what do you look for in a man after 40?" because I'm quite a bit past 50 now.
Soooooooooooooo...
what do I wish for at THIS stage?
Comfort.
Comfortable with.
To be comfortable together.
Ta-da. That's it.
(That's actually quite a lot... and really states it all)
Hehehe, have to make a funny comment on this:
If he is content to watch TV all day and half the night, I would consider him a "dead head" and would not find him interesting at all. Something tells me that a man I'd be comfortable with would also know what a Dead Head is... whether he was one or not. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 10:02:29 PM | Must of hit a truth there huh? I just put down what I have observed
If the shoe fits where it, if the truth hurts bear it...That poster proved my point.
Um Mr. Beemer?
Yes, I would have to agree with your last statement. You did hit a nerve so to speak! You made a generalization that was most unfair! I supported my ex for 19 years! I bought him out, have upgraded my home and have supported two children for 5 years with no help from anyone! Your assumption peed me off to be honest, much the same as if I was to make an assumption about all men being eejits or players! One should tread lightly when making a generalized comment as the "shoe" doesn't fit everyone
Mr. Beemer: Ms. Moonchild is far more diplomatic than I. Your comments are mean spirited and show your own lack of character and understanding. To assume that a woman of middle age has what she has because she has gotten it out of a divorce settlement or from child support is a broad generalization not, in millions of cases, backed up by the facts. I don't own a house, or much of anything else, as I travel the world as a lifestyle. However, everything I have and have ever had I've earned myself. I put myself through 6 years of university, I've supported myself completely since I was 17, and I've traveled the world on my own. No man has ever supported me, not even close. And my parents gave me nothing as well. Your type of remarks are what keeps certain types of men from being appealing--men who think in limited ways, ways that tell women such men actually don't seem to really like our gender, as you seem to think we are weak, lacking in ability and independence, not honest, etc. That could be why you are still single. | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 10:06:31 PM | | Many of the women I meet try to "qualify" me right off the bat. They ask me what I do for a living and where do I reside. They also try to get a peek at what I am driving if we leave the premises where we met together and are awaiting a valet to bring our cars around. I have been through this so many times. Women are so predictable! | |
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| What do women look for in a man after 40?
Posted: 2/16/2009 10:28:15 PM | In my opinion, a guy who thinks "child support" made us rich in our older years.. #1. has NO idea what it actually costs financially to raise children.. and #2. has very little real love/compassion for their offspring because all along they secretly wished all they had to do financially was a few birthday presents.
Okay enough of that, from me. | |
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