| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/16/2006 9:57:58 AM | | what??????? i dont even get a chance to get so far as to say 'nothing', yes wrong guys, ok when things compound & i cant even reach 'nothing' yes big problem | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/16/2006 10:03:01 AM | I would have to agree with fry lock in message 7. typically thats what "nothing" means when i say it. and if the guy keeps pushing the subject warning  it could be hazardous for your health.  However communication generally isnt a problem, but sometimes it is when your not sure how to say something. | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/16/2006 10:03:01 AM | "nothing" a word used by females when they are angry with a partner. Not angry enough for them to comunicate why they are angry, but angry enough to want you to sweat for a while. My thoughts are that this term is ued by insecure people who do not know how to nor want to comunicate effectivly, have trust issues, and self esteem issuses. " if i tell him what bothers me he will leave me" or " im upset at how the person treated me but no I dont really deserve any better" or " if the other person really cared for me they would know what im upset about"
comunicating works... trust me.... | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/16/2006 10:10:05 AM | Ummmm ever heard the saying "careful what you wish for cause you just might get it".....LMAO
If you ask me what's wrong I'LL TELL YA!!  I'll even draw ya a map if you don't get it....lmao See I'm one of those "if you ask me a question you'd best be prepared for the answer" type people. So if you ask me what's wrong..........I'll be tellin' ya....so be careful what ya wish for!!
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/16/2006 11:35:40 AM | Let me just say this, the word NOTHING is not exclusive to the women only.
I dated a guy for several years who would do the same thing. He would obviously be very upset about something and when I would ask what was wrong, what did he say?? You got it, "NOTHING".
It was like he wanted me to drag it out of him....after a while I just ignored him because it pissed me off so much when he did that. I am not a mind reader, nor do I want to be. And if you think I am going to spend hours trying to drag it out of you, you are wrong.
Near the end of the relationship when he would say "nothing" I would just say good!! And then I would go about my business. | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/16/2006 12:05:55 PM | Assuming you're not dealing with someone who's bat $hit insane.. the word nothing means NOTHING.
If I'm just in a crappy mood and my man asks me what's wrong, I either say, "Nothing" or I say, "I'm in a bad mood". I'f I'm mad at my man, I tell him. If I'm mad at someone else, but don't feel like hashing it over with him, I say "it's nothing" or "it's got nothing to do with you".
My bf's don't have to guess if I'm mad at them... or dig deeper for answers. | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/16/2006 12:52:35 PM |
Nothing secret about it -- she's not willing to talk about it for whatever reason, and unless you like to torture yourself, you'd probably do best by respecting that fact.
Dayummmmm BakedSalmon..........you are good!
I'm going to have to go with the BakedSalmon Rocks Fanclub, as well...move on, don't linger over it. One of the worst things you could do to someone who wants privacy on something, either indefinitely or for the moment, is to crowd them. EVEN if that's what they want.
Personally, I'd prefer to say/hear something along the lines of, "Yah, you're right, something is bothering me, but I just need to sit with it for a while before I talk about it. Thanks, though. I'm glad you care..."
And, men use this one too... it's a people thing, not a gender thing.
You could offer a simple, "If and when you want to talk about whatever might be bothering you, I'll be glad to be there for you." Don't push at it. How do you know? Maybe she's practicing being emotionally strong and independent/interdependent, and how hot is *that*!!?
Of course, I have crazy expectations, and I'm a bit on the wierd side of 'Holy, that's wierd', so... take it for what it's worth to you! ;)
Peace,
~Thunder | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 8:50:29 AM | MSG#28 nailed it...
This is to most..
If there is no communication or she is incapable of communicating her problem..
Then that is her problem.. but it becomes your problem because she wont farking
communicate..
Low self_esteem issues definately..
I have learnt 4 things from this thread..
1) Lack of communication from their parts lead to the demise of the relationships..
2) Respect.. WTF!! They showed no respect by NOT talking about it or resolving it..
3) It is a total farking cop out statement..
4) You need to be a farking mind reader...
The word nothing means fark all.. If you are angry and use it to cop out..
Anger is the last known refuge for the incompetent!!! | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 10:40:21 AM | Posts 28 & 38 spelled it out pretty clearly -- Kudos, Gentlemen!!
Folks on this & other dating sites talk endlessly about the horrors of "game playing", yet some are quick to CONDONE head games like this "Nothing" crapola.
Iffen yew don't like 'headgames', try LEADING BY EXAMPLE! | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 12:50:17 PM | | To me, when I say nothing is wrong, it is usually because it is something that I need to deal with. It is easier for me to sort it out by myself, then to drag my partner into it, because usually there is nothing that he can do to help the situation. If it does concern my partner, I will tell him. Hope this helps. | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 1:16:00 PM | For me..." Nothing " means many things ...
It may mean I don't know whats bothering me or even if I do I have no way presently of stating it.
If you've been a suffering idiot then it menas I am seething waiting for the acknowledgment and equal suffering excuse while contemplating kicking your sorry a$$ to the curb.
" Nothing" is a whole lot of something.
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 1:24:12 PM | I wish men wouldn't have this urge to "fix" things all the time. We just want to vent without being offered solutions. One of my ex-boyfriends would come up with dumb ideas to "try"....things that would never work and/or would get people mad at me....
I felt like saying, "I don't want your suggestions. I just want to talk about it!" | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 2:50:17 PM | hello hum you know its the same old thing your not responding to her needs lack of interst on your part shes getting tired of talking about it your not listing to her or it my be the whole thing is getting very stale and or you have made her mad and she is not ready to talk about it or she is planning some day i will leave this guy he is pissing me off thats what i think people or girls think sorry if i hurt you pay more att- not unless you want out dont make promises you cant keep or fix with a girl you will be sorry you did it will bit you in the end  | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 3:40:24 PM | | OP, 'nothing' can mean a number of things...she's po'd at you and doesn't want to discuss it - yet; she's po'd at someone else or about something else and doesn't want to discuss it - yet; she wants to talk to you about something but isn't sure how to bring it up - yet; the reasons for saying 'nothing' are as endless and individual as the person saying it. Usually the best thing to do when you hear them say 'nothing' is to say back, 'Well, I'm here and willing to listen if you want to discuss anything' and leave it at that. | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 7:00:44 PM | | Gosh, women are pretty good at that answer, aren't they?! There is no concrete translation, though, as it varies from woman to woman and situation to situation. The bottom line is that men and women communicate differently. When a guy responds with, "nothing", it likely means just that - absolutely freakin nothing. With women...well, it is much more likely to mean that it is everything except nothing. As much as people can detest the reference, John Gray's, "Mars and Venus" books do a decent job at tackling those communicative translation issues. And, ultimately, when you are in a relationship, the above is something that needs to be discussed - but not in the heat of a "nothing" moment! | |
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| A question for the ladies.. The word NOTHING..
Posted: 6/17/2006 7:27:46 PM | 1. I am so PISSED that if I try to explain you'll end up wearing your coconuts for earrings, so it's best to leave me alone.
when i am in this mood and pissed off and i answer you nothing...i say it very sarcastically...it means leave me alone...*nothing good* will come out of my mouth if i open it. it could be something so insignificant that set me off but was enough to put a match to a already bad day..or it could be something bigger that i am not ready to deal with and make matters worse.
#2 could just be a moody day and i dont myself know whats wrong...i will say nothing in a more mellow manner....i just wish to be left alone to try to work it out. my partner cant help fix something i dont know is causing the mood.
#3 could be just that...he wont understand why something is bugging me..could be work or something someone said..etc...something that annoys me but would have no effect on him.
 but when i start dating a guy..he gets warned over #1....dont push or ask a 2nd time...if i walk away you know fireworks are coming and he better duck and hide | |
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