| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 9/18/2006 7:42:03 AM | In my opinion when I think what might really be going on is reveng. What might make you feel better is to let it go and move on with your life, I am sure he has not taken a moment to think about how you might still be upset or hurting over what happened. This is wasted energy and time for you. Be happy you found out sooner than later and find some peace about it. You will need your energy to focus on good things; like a good man and being happy.  Take care. | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 9/18/2006 8:39:00 AM | I've said this once before and got flamed because I hit a nerve.
If your man turned into a raving a$$hole with you, is there not even the slightest possibility that his "a$$holeness" was reactionary to YOUR behavior?
Web sites like don't date him are filled with posts from angry women who live their life blaming their problems on everybody else. Never themselves.
IF you were ALWAYS late and that bugged him so much he dropped you, why is HE a jerk? You were always late!
And that goes on time after time.
Petty, juvenile and childish to get in one last cheap shot after he has no contact with you.
And possibly ground to be sued so you work the rest of your life to pay him. You have heard of defamation of character, I assume? Libel? Slander? It's only slander until it's printed. Then it also becomes libel.
Think many times before you take your anger out in a public forum. | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 9/18/2006 11:14:17 AM | Personally, I would not choose to do this. What goes wrong in an intimate, private relationship is exactly that. Private. The world need not know if I have a broken heart. I may chose to share with certain individuals that I confide in, but other than that... it's nobody's business.
Another thing to keep in mind:
Every relationship consists of at least two people. Which means two people that must make it work or two who have their story as to why it didn't. (Those that have more than two people - well, that's probably the reason for it's demise right there) So... wouldn't it be prudent to look in the mirror and, more importantly, at yourself as the ex perceives you. Now think; Have I ever made a mistake that I wouldn't want the whole world to know? Did my partner see me as perfect?
There are other questions one could ask, but I think my point is made.
If you can write nasty "realities" or "warnings" to the world about your ex, who/what would stop an ex from writing about you? (and who would know if it was a complete fabrication?)
Just a little food for thought. Live well and let "Kharma" or "natural justice" take care of what it must. | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 9/18/2006 11:44:18 AM | The trouble is there are always two sides to a story, ime not in anyway saying yours is wrong but two stories about one relationship,,, which would you believe.
no
references to whether your a female and he is a male... just two stories!!!
I ran a website for equal rights for parents.... i had to take out all references to places etc all references to friends and family and any reference that may be deemed libelous
jeez in some situations i ws left with my name is John.......well thats my story PMSL... True i know this for a fact coz it was mine!!! lol
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diviny
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Joined: 6/12/2006
Msg: 282 | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 12/19/2006 11:07:58 PM | | Man oh man do some of you make women look bad and bitter. Quite simply put...if some guy mistreated you in an illegal way, go to the authorities. If he mistreated you in any other way... Stand up like the woman you are and walk away...then let it go... for Gods sakes ladies..if you keep letting his actions bother you after the relationship is over...seems to me you have left him with all the power.... besides..if the relationship was lengthy.. really, you are 50% to blame..for letting someone treat you like that. If he cheated on you.......whatever..get over it.. happens every day..all the time.. posting on a public forum to warn other women..simply wont work. Women fall in and out of love regardless of what someone has said. One guy who cheats on you may totally adore and cherish his next lady and never dream of cheating. And...yes.. there are some real players, jerks,,etc that will continue to be.. and there are also some real ****es that continue to be also.. A public forum for exposing them.. Just childish in my opinion...lets face it..we are all grown ups here..we can do our own choosing and use our own intuitions without someone else slandering a person..possibly unjustly...ok now Im off to my REAL LIFE. | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 12/20/2006 2:18:33 AM | | ok first off dont listen to the rest of this bullshit...listen to this...it all really depends...if it was like a major thing..maybe..if the chick was a cold heartless ****...but damn people..he's a guy...and he's human(i hope so any way)give him a break...so he hurt u...GET OVER IT and MOVE ON!!! simple as that....i wouldnt do it...ive had shit happen to me...rape been beaten...an shit like that and i still wouldnt post stuff about them on sites...cause its ridiculous....dont go and ruin sum one else life just cause he hurt u...u kno its not that hard to move on and find sumone else....yea it takes time but Big Friggin' Deal...so in answer the ur post...no i dont think so...i would never do that... | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 12/20/2006 2:21:00 AM | ok i take that whole dont listen to the rest of this bullshit back....sum of the chicks on her have the same idea...but the rest...need to grow up and get over it....simple as that
peace | |
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brat33
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Joined: 11/4/2006
Msg: 286 | |
| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 1/2/2007 6:49:05 PM | | i have been there and done that and next time i will be alot more careful about who i meet ..and by the way the same man that abused me is on pof for the second time so be very careful............ | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 3/24/2007 1:14:57 PM | Most certainly, I am just looking for the right place to do it, Considering making my own site actually, and why not save women and men alike the bullshit and give us a choice whether or not we need to waste our time,.
Some of these men and women alike are just plain losers and the only way they can get into someones head is to lie and pretend to be someone they are not, mostly because if you took away what they think they have or who they pretend to be , what would be left? Nothing ........ a fake!!
Someone who is insecure with who they are so they need to be a fake. Thats right a fake. I have no time for crap and I call it like I see it and maybe thats why I am single by choice because most men are just a waste of time. They cant see past their nose when a lady who has alot to offer comes along . Nice guys finish last.... but so do nice ladys ......  | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 3/24/2007 1:58:11 PM | As tempting as it can, be I would have to say Not a good idea to wage war. My X threw me out the day I found out I might have cancer, that was not the reason of the breakup (insert any number of answers). I never saw it coming and am still reeling from the shock of it. But am doing remarkably well considering everything. We live in a smal mountain community and while the rumour mill has been running rampant, I have not added fuel to that fire. Yes what he did was horrific, but he didn't do it out of spite, he did it to simplify his life.
The way I look at it is That is is His Karma no mine. I will take no part in ruining him socially. Things catch up to people. Some of these men (or women) will be in their 60s, Old, fat, balding, alone and lonely wondering how they could have gotten to that point. Makes me sad. I wish my x all the best & he is still a friend. It is always best to live by example | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 3/24/2007 3:24:14 PM | This forum is very cool, lots of opinions, lots of insights. I, too, have been victimized (or rather the attempt was made)...I choose not to be. I got out of the relationship though it took me 4 years. My eyes have never been opened more than they are now. I have left my two cents worth in various areas of the web intentionally, maybe immaturely, though I believe that forewarned is forearmed!, and I don't regret it. The man I was with was very smooth, and very underhandly a free loading gold digger. I feel women should have a place where they can "air their experiences". Some women have no one to turn to or talk with, so maybe they need to vent and get advice or an empathic ear while they are in the "getting over it, healing stage", some like myself, who are very trusting, get duped and taken for a ride, why should these women not be able to "warn or alert" other women. Not everyone has the financial resources to get legal advice if needed or to right a wrong. I know that personally I kicked myself in the ass for not heeding my intuition, warning signs and friends warnings, even former friends of his, questioned our couplehood. I was suspicious of their reasons for making such statements and yes, I did not heed the warnings, I thought I was in love. I thought in my situation, because this had been the first relationship after my marriage ended, that maybe being jaded from that hurt, that I wasnt being open minded or fair enough with this individual and I second guessed myself out of $50K....however, once the truth was unveiled, I took legal action against him and through this medium, he will be exposed not only to the general public but to his family and friends as well, and why not, he committed a crime. I'd want to know if there was a serial rapiest on the loose in my area, why not be warned of a con artist. These people, whether male or female, dont just hurt that person they claim to love, but if there are children involved, this impacts their lives and development, other family members, friends, etc....Why should we as a society accept these unfortunate experiences and tell people, ah, get over it, move on, forget about it, its just part of life. Being hurt, physically, emotionally or financially, is not acceptable, not now or ever. Those who perpretrate unjust harm to us in anyway, should be accoutable and should atone. I've learned a great many lessons these past 4 years, but I remain hopeful, that there really is someone out there for everyone, including me. Ladies, just be careful if you do post any comments on the web about a former partner who has done you wrong...here are the rules of the game 1) Never use last names 2) Never mention his employer by name- they arent the ones you have issues with and that can become a case for "Defammation of Character, or Slander" 3) Never accuse on line something that can't be proven in a court of law....i.e. if you say as I did, he ripped me off, you better have the paper proof (I do)....just be careful about generalities and specifics....
And just like a few others have mentioned, my ex is on this site as well and I would be more than happy to provide the user name upon request.
....happy at last... | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 3/24/2007 4:07:56 PM | | Absolutely!!!!! why not.... i know in this day and age we are supposed to rise above it and move on with grace and dignity.... but hey.....look at it this way, forewarned is forearmed if you catch my drift so do it in the name of sisterly love!!!!!!! so i say go for it xx | |
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IvyCoe
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Joined: 2/24/2007
Msg: 295 | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 3/25/2007 12:23:03 PM | The whole thing is that one's experiences with another person are usually no barometer of the individual's personality. I know in the past, there were some girls I was an ass to, and some that I was great with. Just because someone treated you poorly, doesn't mean they are a bad person. Maybe you brought out something in them, like if you are clingy, maybe you turned them off somehow?
All you are doing, by supposedly "forwarning" future people, is showing how upset and petty you are. The only good choice to forget them and move on. | |
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EmBar
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Joined: 6/29/2006
Msg: 297 | |
| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 3/25/2007 9:06:49 PM | | Depends on the level of jerk-iness displayed. If it was just general idiotic beahviour, no. If he was abusive or anything like that then TOTALLY. After stapling his balls to the wall i would totally dish out on the net. | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 3/26/2007 4:50:44 PM | LOL hell yeah... BUT, I am not mean enough to name him, K?
Starting way back last year. I met and started dating this man I met on ***oo Personals. It was really good at first. He started in the 2nd month to say that he loved me, wanted me to move in. I asked him to please be patient. I was not ready to live with him. Long story short, he would get mad about once a month and not call or anything for a couple of weeks at a time. This went on for a year. I always went back to him. I can only say that I thought that I loved him. Our arguments were usually because he wanted me to do something that I was not comfortable doing... Such as, give up my Dachshunds to my ex husbandso that I did not have to have contact with him/my ex husband. (We share them) I have to say, my ex husband and I always get along, no problems!! AND my ex boyfriend was ALWAYS accusing me of wanting to get back together with my ex husband. This was/is not true at all. Anyway. About a month ago, he got mad at me again LOL This time, he EMAILED and told me that he met and talked to HIS ex wife.... ( They had been divorced for around 3 years or so now.), he said that within 5 minutes of talking to her he knew that he was still in love with her. He said to please NOT CONTACT HIM because he was embarrassed about it all LOL For the very first time in my life, it felt as if someone took a knife and just stabbed my heart over and over again... And for the recors, I am not certain if it is because I felt that I loved hom or if it was just because I felt so STUPID/BETRAYED etc... I really thought I was going to throw up LOL So... opinions please??? Any and all welcome, even if it is just to call me a dumbaZZ  | |
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| Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 3/26/2007 5:59:48 PM | NO!! Because people behave differently w/other people. He may have been a jerk to you, and it could be because he wasn't the one for you. The next person or person after that may be just the person. That's why we are out here searching...to find the person we may or not be with.
Just be cool, hang loose and move on. | |
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