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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?      Home login  
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 jukewhimsey
Joined: 5/28/2006
Msg: 51
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Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?Page 3 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
Of course! I want a site from which to shout my pain! I want the whole world to know how much I suffered - and who did the dastardly deed(s)! I want to tell the ugly tale and name names!

And since you asked:
...I want the site to allow the collection of personal expressions of sympathy from every "nice" man and woman out there! And maybe they could send me sympathy presents right from the site! Flowers, chocolates (I could provide a list of suppliers) and maybe even a "Sympathy Register" where I could make my selections in advance, just on the outside chance that a "not nice" person will get to me and hurt me (however rarely it might actually happen in one's lifetime - the premise is that it could hypothetically happen anytime, anywhere a person interacts with others).

...I want to get all the emails coming from total strangers to tell me how right I was to dump him, how undeserving I am (being such a nice person) of being treated that way, how it is his loss and there are PlentyofFish!. Maybe one or two bruisers out there could offer to beat him up for me! Sic'em!

Come on, grown-ups: Let's get real. If I am in a relationship, I certainly have to take some responsibility for what happens in it. No one can treat me worse than I allow them to without legal infringement, for which our society has provided a legal remedy.

If there is no law breaking - except moral, then maybe I need lessons on trust and emotional risk. If I need them, then I need them. So I should pay special attention to what happened. How did I let myself be sucked into caring for someone who was "not worthy" (however you wanna define it) so as to avoid THAT mistake again. Lesson Learned, hopefully.

It's always possible to be caught up in an emotional nightmare of any kind; to be betrayed, ripped off, exploited, victimized - even have your identity stolen. Just being in the world provides the opportunity for the "not nice" people of the world to turn into "confidence" men or women - working very hard to get your trust and confidence in them. Your trust and confidence are pre-requisite for turning you into a victim. Trust them at your peril. They are detectable. Watch what they do - especially if it does not match what they say. But if you are still taken in (some "not nice" people are really good actors and can pass for "nice"), certainly, take what legal remedies there might be to document their "not nice" behavior for other's protection (and your compensation).

Chalk the rest up to experience, forgive yourself for being such a patsy and move on. To carry it with you only allows for more damage.
 Dreamingsinger
Joined: 5/23/2006
Msg: 52
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 9:38:23 AM
That is a difficult question indeed. On one hand, he broke your heart so you should make himhurt as bad as you are hurting. On the other hand, two wrongs don't make a right. Should youreally resort to childishness, just to try and heel your heartache. You would probably still hurt anyway.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 53
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Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 9:40:51 AM
Sounds like you had a bitter experience. I am so sorry you feel you need revenge.

Well as far as abuse and rape victims, for those that need protecting from, there are restraining orders and some offenders have to report their where abouts, as felons. You need to let go and get help, seek counseling.

And besides, I prefer not to share who the victims are, as the postee. Gee it rings, I've been used before, so you can take advantage of me!!!....to answer your question: Absolutely NOT. He's gone?? Good riddance
 KILLERDOGSMOOCH
Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 54
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 9:53:47 AM
Lnstarkiss wrote:
...but I just don't get it. How the heck is it immature, revengeful, or healing to allow a scam artist free reign?


I think that by posting someone's identity for what you think he did wrong is not only illegal according to the privacy act laws but it is immoral. You are not the law and by posting him you have now convicted him and are giving him serious punishment. That is for the courts even if you say,
...Most men or women who have been scammed out of money do not seek resolution through the legal system because of embarrassment.


SIMPLY, If you do not go through the legal system for what ever reason, then you are a vigilantly and the perpetrator will probably get the last laugh on you by using the legal system against you, because believe me there is no greater power than our legal systems on both sides of the border.
 Lnstarkiss
Joined: 5/8/2006
Msg: 55
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 10:03:31 AM
msg.54, If you read my posts, I made no mention of subjective wrong-doing. Only if adequate proof is offered should the offender be listed. I'm not sure what a vigilantly is, but confer with any law enforcement agency, and they will tell you the same thing I have. People are too humiliated by their experience to pursue a legal course of action. It is even difficult to persuade rape victims to prosecute.
 lorie1
Joined: 5/23/2006
Msg: 56
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 10:10:11 AM
Yes,I would. Someone I met online (not this site,but one where "winks"are sent) had(and still does) quite a skill at taking up a lot of time and thought of a great deal of many people, myself included.
I don't know how it could be posted,legitimately,without being accused of public slander. I do wish there was some sort of way to warn others of certain people who are deliberately misleading others on line, as a form of 'entertainment'.Lets face it, no one enjoys being emotionally exploited!
 lorie1
Joined: 5/23/2006
Msg: 57
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 10:11:40 AM
Yup! You ARE right!
 lorie1
Joined: 5/23/2006
Msg: 58
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 10:12:40 AM
Yup! You ARE right!, Jukewhimsey!
 KILLERDOGSMOOCH
Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 59
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 10:19:57 AM
LNSTARKISS WROTE:
msg.54, If you read my posts, I made no mention of subjective wrong-doing. Only if adequate proof is offered should the offender be listed. I'm not sure what a vigilantly is, but confer with any law enforcement agency, and they will tell you the same thing I have. People are too humiliated by their experience to pursue a legal course of action. It is even difficult to persuade rape victims to prosecute.



Your adequate proof is not enough and your panel of judges on here are not good enough, your lack of legitimacy as a court and lack of legitimacy as a moral director and lack of legitimacy as a judge to hand out the appropriate punishment is in question. WE ESTABLISH THESE LEVELS OF STANDARDS FOR OUR COURTS.

How is it that the victims on here won't prosecute by the courts but they can nail their accused on here? So, with that said, I think the so called victims on here fail the legitimacy tests and their complaints are probably false, (and maybe only counseling is needed. Our police force has lists of support resources that are better than this forum and the vigilanty talk)
 Lnstarkiss
Joined: 5/8/2006
Msg: 60
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 10:40:29 AM
My word msg. 59. You are adament about your position. No one here is suggesting we incarcerate the offender (male or female). And as far as I can see by the posts, only interested individuals can make a judgement whether they would like to continue the relationship. I envision a site of this nature to be similar to a consumer guide. Read the info, and make your own decisions whether or not to purchase the product.
 KILLERDOGSMOOCH
Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 61
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 10:52:12 AM
No way, because if I screw up and hurt someone, I sure don't want my face and life plastered all over some hate site. I don't care what ever your motive is, I hope we hurry up and legislate the end to this kind of web site justice unless there is some already. What I will do is call up a web site lawyer this week and find out the laws.

We are not consumer products even though we put ourselves out there as being available for people to decide. Cars, boats, homes, are objects and do not have feelings, like people do and when push comes to shove CARS, OBJECTS do not push back, so tread lightly with someone's identity is all I am saying. That is a very very very fragile and delicate nature posting anything about someone. We live in a civilization where we take special care to protect even the villains until properly prosecuted. The wild west days are over and this internet stuff has to be the latest wild west but it will soon learn the laws of the land.
 Lnstarkiss
Joined: 5/8/2006
Msg: 62
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 11:13:04 AM
An effective web site of the nature we have been discussing will never come to fruition. After all, who is willing to go to all the trouble of monitoring it? Also, as a friend who is a mathematical genius pointed out to me, the number of posts, based on statistics, would be staggering. There is, however, a tv show that does very nearly the same thing, on a much more limited basis. I am very happy to see that you intend to get more information through an attorney. It would interesting to see the legal take on this. Will you email me with the results? I really would appreciate it.
 KILLERDOGSMOOCH
Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 63
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 11:21:14 AM
Good luck with that.
 Lnstarkiss
Joined: 5/8/2006
Msg: 64
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 11:24:01 AM
lmao, rolling around laughing under your desk. Oh wait, no, that's my desk.
 alwaysme
Joined: 4/10/2006
Msg: 65
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 11:32:31 AM
In reply to msg25 I still stand by what I said, no woman is going to listen to what an ex has to say about a man, not in the beginning, they find out for themselves, trust me. I am in that situation right now. I did try to warn my ex's new wife, she would ask me things, and, I was honest with her. She didnt believe it, so, I just said, fine, you will find out for yourself in time, and guess what??? Two years later, she is seeing everything I said is true. You can tell a woman anything about the man she is with, it wont matter, not until they find out for themselves. I dont know what it is, maybe some women truly believe that they can change a man.........
 bazooza
Joined: 6/16/2006
Msg: 66
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 2:52:16 PM

It would interesting to see the legal take on this. Will you email me with the results? I really would appreciate it.


And me too! Please... Although I have serious doubdt you'll contact the attorney. You sound exactly like the guy we want to see on a website like the one we are talking about! I mean like someone who screwed up in the past and now is affraid of the truth coming out!

Thanks, Lnstarkiss, for the support! I agree with most of your comments!
 sweetheart66
Joined: 5/24/2006
Msg: 67
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 11:20:55 PM
Yes, I believe he should be exposed to try to save other women.When someone intentionally hurts and plays with your heart,mind, and soul they will do it as many as they can and get some sick joy out of it.
 Nature23
Joined: 6/11/2006
Msg: 68
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 11:36:22 PM
No, because if he had the chance to read it he would know just how much you really still care about his sorry butt. So don't carry that around on your back and bring yourself down you where born into the world by yourself you don't need someone's butt on your back. Hint hint. free yourself sweetheart and move on. No one said that it was going to be easy, and it will not to be honest with you but you can do it. Just have a little faith.
 curly80
Joined: 6/1/2006
Msg: 69
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Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 11:40:34 PM
Already did...To warn other women about him and how he used me in the relationship for his own benefit. I don't think its vendictive, actually I think I did a service to other women who read that and may come in contact with him. If they listen, they won't go through the pain and hurt that I went through.
 That Guy Him
Joined: 12/8/2005
Msg: 70
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/17/2006 11:52:56 PM
I do believe that no woman would fake or create that kind of history on purpose unless and until she's been violated.

Here... let me fill you in on a little something.

Paragraph 15 of my ex's sworn affidavit that she presented to the courts:

Many times I would come home and (our daughter's) pre-made meals in the fridge were untouched. Many times when I came home, her diaper had not been changed and she was soaked through the diaper into her pajamas and onto her sheets. More often then not, the Petitioner had also neglected to change her diapers and sheets even when there was feces in the diaper. Many times (our daughter) would develop a very significant rash on her bottom as a result of not having her diaper changed during the time that the Petitioner was responsible for her care.

This is what she swore under oath to in a court of law! For one, there were no pre-made meals. Our daughter was just barely 1 year old... she was still eating jarred baby/toddler food. Secondly, my ex worked from 11 pm - 7 am. When she got home from work, our daughter was still sleeping, and if she was up (with a clean diaper) there was hell to pay because when she got home from work, she would go to sleep and often times wouldn't wake up until 11 am. Therefore this "feces" she spoke of was a result of my ex not being awake to change our daughter's diapers herself when she was responsible for our daughter's care. If our daughter woke up during the night and needed a clean diaper, I always did it. I am normally a sound sleeper, but I heard every noise that little girl ever made when she was a baby, and there were only about 20 nights that I didn't have to get up and change her at least once.

What does this have to do with what you're asking? It's a matter of perception. Who's to say your interpretation of the man you want to bash is correct? We don't know if what your saying is fact or fiction. Even if we did, it just sounds like you are bitter. You know what? There are a**holes in this world. We all know it. Instead of "warning" people about specific individuals, you'd be better off starting a website encouraging people to look for warning signs. It would be a lot more helpful because these people don't walk around in uniforms with their names sewn on the pockets.
 lifeiswhat
Joined: 4/1/2006
Msg: 71
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/18/2006 7:52:46 AM
I most definetly would: Kinda recently did this to my ex husband..
He had a six month long affair 9 years ago which ultmately ended in our divorce.

However he started a new relationship and only told her "we didn't work out"
In 3 months they had already planned to marry..

I thought and thought long and hard how I could warn this woman.. one day I figured it out.. I can't tell you what I did but she now knows the truth.. They called the wedding off for a couple of weeks she was so distraught.. However I believe now they are back on... she deserved to know the truth...
 That Guy Him
Joined: 12/8/2005
Msg: 72
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/18/2006 11:38:18 AM
He had a six month long affair 9 years ago which ultmately ended in our divorce... I thought and thought long and hard how I could warn this woman.. one day I figured it out.. I can't tell you what I did but she now knows the truth.. They called the wedding off for a couple of weeks she was so distraught.. However I believe now they are back on... she deserved to know the truth...

So what you're trying to say is perhaps now the next time you're involved with someone, your ex should cut and paste this post to go and show this fellow that you are spiteful and vindictive and that if a relationship fails with you, your life will be spent interferring with that individual's pursuit of happiness. They deserve to know the truth, no?
 psssst
Joined: 2/8/2006
Msg: 73
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/18/2006 11:40:44 AM
^^^ Bravo!!! Couldn't have phrased it better myself!
 terminallycute
Joined: 8/3/2005
Msg: 74
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/18/2006 11:46:11 AM
hmmm

well since I dont date jerks.. I dont have any ex's who are jerks!!

why is it that when a relationship fails to meet ones expecations....the other person is a jerk, is autoamtically a jerk, a bi*ch, an ass*ole..or any other rude names we choose to call those we have once been close too?

If it didnt work out, then it just wasnt meant to be (for what ever reason)...You loved this person at one time....is it really right to refer to them as anything else then..."someone from your past"?

ok..sure ...they did.."this and this and this"...but there is never anyone who is innocent in the break up of a relationship..

forgive me...i didnt read every post...but this is my opinion to what the OP said
 ManitobaGrrl
Joined: 1/18/2006
Msg: 75
Do you want the world to know what a jerk he is?
Posted: 6/18/2006 8:43:20 PM
No, because I would be sinking down to their level, I'm too old for that kind of thing,
and I believe that the best revenge is living well.
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