| Meeting men while still chatting with others...
Posted: 6/21/2006 7:26:53 AM | So, here's a related question: If you're chatting with a few guys, and say you DO start dating someone exclusively... what's the best way to say it? Somehow, starting off a conversation with, "By the way, no longer available" doesn't feel right.  | |
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tinum
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Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 29 | |
| Meeting men while still chatting with others...
Posted: 6/21/2006 7:36:30 AM |
So, here's a related question: If you're chatting with a few guys, and say you DO start dating someone exclusively... what's the best way to say it?
from my perspective if you say that you want tell someone " ok, now can we be exclusive" mean that you both were dating on each your sides. What would have had to happened to change your mind about something that you felt wasn't worth being exclusive in the begining? if you expereinced the whole range of a person and feel you want to be exclusive than I can only assume that you have expereinced under the covers as well. Lots of women get serious after sleeping with someone it is a well know fact. it is a well know fact also that many women dont know what they want. so does this mean you have to be intimate with everyone you date until you hit one that rubs the right spot for you to say that you would be inclined to be exclusive? this is all suppositions by the way. | |
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Drexx
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Joined: 6/5/2006
Msg: 30 | |
| Meeting men while still chatting with others...
Posted: 6/21/2006 7:49:21 AM | | Yeah, sounds sort of immature to me. I mean if you haven't commited yourself to anyone, then why should you stop chatting or whatever with other men. Geeez, probably a good indicator that maybe you should stay away. Sounds a little possesive to me. | |
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| Meeting men while still chatting with others...
Posted: 6/21/2006 7:23:27 PM | | This is in response to CHUPACABRAS. Yes, some people may have initial interest, start dating..be intimate or be intimate first then date...at the end of it all to be exclusive takes a lot more than initial interest. I can only speak for myself and not all women. You really can't experience the WHOLE range of a person from a few dates. Personally believe that it takes much more than that. Everyone puts their best foot forward for the first little while. I prefer to wait until the other person is comfortable enough to show who they really are! Then I can base my decision on my interest level. Furthermore, [so does this mean you have to be intimate with everyone you date until you hit one that rubs the right spot for you to say that you would be inclined to be exclusive?] the answer to this is 'no' and the right spot isn't a sexual one...I can handle that on my own thanks.. The right spot is intellectually! | |
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| Meeting men while still chatting with others...
Posted: 6/21/2006 7:47:23 PM | I really don't think anyone can tell another whom you should speak to , how or when, if you are have not agreed that you are in a one way, one stay relationship.
I have to agree that jealousy is a sore tooth. But don't throw it in someones face that you are talking to other guys on the net. The net has become another threat to the development of a relationship. I usually , if it gets that far, ask , are we still interneting and plenty of fishing now that we are considered a couple.
If I am considered a coulpe with someone, then I don't need to talk to others on the net. I would be talking to him. | |
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tinum
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Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 33 | |
| Meeting men while still chatting with others...
Posted: 6/21/2006 9:37:42 PM |
This is in response to CHUPACABRAS. Yes, some people may have initial interest, start dating..be intimate or be intimate first then date...at the end of it all to be exclusive takes a lot more than initial interest.
See this reinforce my belief. People who date are people who dont want to get into an emotional relationship and they do what they want with anyone they find attractive (intelectually or physically or a mix of both) your business to do what you please with yourself and the person that you are with. this is the new era that it is politically correct to jump from one partner to another and back and forth until someone gets tired of it or that you find a good fit. Process of elimination. Simple and efficient.
On my side I am an old fashion dude, am sorry. If I date someone and keep on dating someone its becuase she inspire me, she thrills me, she thingles my senses. I jsut don't go out with all sort of girl to see which one is the best, I respect women way too much for my own good i think. I believe that if you share yourself with someone well this expereince is special (intelectual or physical or a mix of both) a woman that will enjoy my intelectual or physical proximity will have the benifit of being sure that I am not the kind that will screw around... you know what? once a girl got it for me, there is no way in hell I would be able to date other women.... she would never have it. I am a full package and I ain't cheap, you want me, there are rules. you wanna play with me, there's the door... i have no need to force someone to be exclusive with me, girls are always free to do what they want. one catch... if you want to keep me you better play straight and not give me that CRAP that you can establish a serious relationship based of a foundation of when you met you were sleeping with 4 other guys. what will be the scenario if you ever bumped into someone you "dated"? that is a recipy for disaster and i know better for "myself" not to do that sort of thing. you do what you want, i'll do what i want and faithfulness weight incredibly high on my standards | |
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| Meeting men while still chatting with others...
Posted: 6/22/2006 3:56:56 AM | | Hold up there...Who wrote anything about jumping from one partner to another. That was a general reference about 'some people'...not a reference to myself. 'Dating' does not mean 'sleeping with every guy you have interest in'. Dating is just that...dating. Spending time together, getting to know eachother better. I agree, faithfulness is of utter importance in any relationship, when youre IN a relationship. A recipe for disaster is two people falling into a relationship without getting to know eachother better, (not referring to the bedroom either) and then realize that if they had taken more time they really wouldnt be together. | |
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tinum
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Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 35 | |
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| Meeting men while still chatting with others...
Posted: 6/23/2006 5:04:04 PM | 'tinum' you have yet once again changed your ID name???
After reading your updated profile I am sure that if there was an interesting girl who doesn't mind 'serial dating' as you referred to it, she will be sure not to be open about it.
Sheesh....Does it really have to do more with someone being openminded? | |
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