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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/19/2009 1:48:55 PM | | After several years of dating I realize that women want men with money. Most of the time when I meet a woman who shows some interest in me the first words out of her mouth are "What do you do?" to vocationally qualify me. As the OP stated CEOs are not looking to date janitors. Many times I give very sarcastic answers to this question since I feel it is so rude to ask it right off the bat. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/19/2009 2:19:55 PM | | Really hmmm, I never had any guy ever ask me what my income was......weird considering you say it's all about that!! | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/19/2009 3:29:12 PM | | I think women ask men what their vocation is, (and vice versa), to see if they have any common ground....I don't think it's ALWAYS about money........ | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 5:17:18 AM | 1. paying for dates is training for marriage, if you can't sustain feeding that woman, what are you going to do when you marry and make babies. It's a cue for you to realize what it takes to sustain a household, and the children you will put into this world. If you can't afford that, go back to work, work two jobs, until you can handle the responsability, instead of pulling a woman down a toilette.
2. i had always paid my half of things, dutch treat, but i realize that my friends who are married, the man always paid. and when i see so many bimbos getting free trips, and their bills paid because a man wants to buy the time of that perfect ten he wants to bang, why the hell shouldn't i have dinner? i'm changing the way i've always done things, the guy asking me out probably has a few women on the side, and at some point complains during my dutch treat dinner about all the money he spent on someone else... screw that, from now on, if he won't pay for me, i don't want to see him again, because apparently, i'm not worth as much as some women are to you males. and i don't whine about financial problems or beg for gifts, as far as i'm concerned, pay for my meal, cuz that walk u want to push me to take afterward isnt about looking at the moon, now is it? and if i refuse that walk, you'll just say mean things anyways! | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 5:59:47 AM | If you don`t have income, you can`t afford to date.For the men saying that women want men with money,most women want the man to have a Job and be able to support himself.Why should we hang out with someone that drags us down financially??
Most mature women have no problem paying for their share of a meal or whatever it may be. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 6:59:09 AM | I dated a woman briefly at the beginning of the year who was also dating another guy in town...
Her interests included boating and travel to exotic places.
Both of her choices were decent, hard-working individuals. I pay my bills and support my daughters while the other guy is wealthy owning a boat and a condo in Cancun.
Who SHOULD she have chosen and should her choosing the other guy be considered shallow? | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 7:11:02 AM | Softgrass, 1. your attitude just goes to show how some women are completely disrespectful and entitled to a man's income(and that's on good terms, can't imagine how entitled you would feel if the relationship ever fell into bad terms.) You seem to be looking at marriage as a free ticket for life, it's not. If you are wilfully refusing to sustain yourself financially, while expecting another to fully support you, than you are no better than a selfish spoiled child. These children that you will put into this world are just as much your own responsibility and that includes financial responsibility.
2. Just because someone else gets something doesn't mean you are owed that same deal. If a guy paid for a date, against his best wishes, what makes you feel as though it's right for you to ask for the same thing? If you saw someone steal from someone else, would you feel entitle to steal from this person too? Anyway, It is very sad that you see your own personal worth as a human being through how much money would a man spend on you compared to another woman.
SweetAndUnique, A man who wants to be closer to his children isn't a man who is more feminine, just like a woman who gets a job isn't more masculine. Personalities go a lot deeper than these preconceived polar gender identities.
You are also spreading some very false preconceptions about men not wanting to cherish a women. There are men who would throw money at women without ever cherishing or appreciating them and there are men who don't spend a lot of money on women yet still worship the very ground they walk on(which also seems to go unappreciated).
Also, you don't know what income the men who argue this issue have so don't assume that they are all poor just so you can diminish them; although, I think you did a great job at demonstrating the level of entitlement and shallow materialism some women have, which is what this thread is about. Women are not entitled to a man's income just because they are women, how about you learn how to treat men as a human beings before you start ranting about how men need to learn how to treat women as princesses. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 7:22:18 AM | 1. paying for dates is training for marriage, if you can't sustain feeding that woman, what are you going to do when you marry and make babies. It's a cue for you to realize what it takes to sustain a household, and the children you will put into this world. If you can't afford that, go back to work, work two jobs, until you can handle the responsability, instead of pulling a woman down a toilette.
So, THAT'S what it's all about.
Many of us guys have suspected as much for a very long time. Thanks for telling it like it is....
...and when i see so many bimbos getting free trips, and their bills paid because a man wants to buy the time of that perfect ten he wants to bang, why the hell shouldn't i have dinner?i'm changing the way i've always done things...screw that, from now on, if he won't pay for me, i don't want to see him again, because apparently, i'm not worth as much as some women are to you males.
Please send pictures of your butt in a nice thong or something.
I'd be happy to let you know just how much you are worth and how rich a guy you can expect to attract, the types of free trips, cars, condos and other gifts and prizes you can expect to have lain at your feet....
.... I do this as a public service....
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 9:19:28 AM | itechman63 asked...
"Who SHOULD she have chosen and should her choosing the other guy be considered shallow?"
Seriously, you aren't expecting an answer to this, right? Did she choose the other guy and then tell you it was because he had a lot of money? If she didn't say, are you assuming she chose based on income? | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 9:24:57 AM |
After several years of dating I realize that women want men with money. Most of the time when I meet a woman who shows some interest in me the first words out of her mouth are "What do you do?" to vocationally qualify me.
I agree with you. Men do the same thing! I learned what you said from men when I hid my status. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 8:50:08 PM | That's a lie, women want way more than that, even women that already have their own money. This is what men are sick of. Men marry women all the time that don't have much money. But for some reason a woman thinks if SHE has money it automatically entitles her to something. I've never heard a guy say he'll only date a woman that makes the same amount of money as him. But I see women make that stupid statement all the time.
Men actually worry about personality more than women do in my opinion. All men want is a woman that is enjoyable to be with, doesn't use sex as a bartering tool, and doesn't weigh 300 pounds a year after they marry her. Women want it all, a guy that looks like Brad Pitt, makes a million dollars a year, has a 10+ inch c**k, is at least 6 foot tall, the list is endless.
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 9:40:16 PM | ^^^LOL Yeah looks like it seems that way. To them, all those qualities make up Mr. right, or has how THEY put it. Funny thing is I only see this kind of mentality online. Ooooh what a beautiful fantasy world this is.. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 11:21:14 PM | Well, I guess I can't really blame you guys for feeling this way. Whenever I think you're being totally unreasonable, along comes someone like Softgrass and proves that there are still at least some women who feel entitled to a guy's money just by virtue of being female. At least she's upfront about it! | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/20/2009 11:42:40 PM | | Most women who are attractive and know it date for money. Just the way it is. Ill call BS on just about any woman who says otherwise. Women first ask what you do for a living, where you went to school, what your career goals are, THEN, and only if you pass these previously mentioned questions, they'll ask you things like your hobbies and interests. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 12:12:41 AM | | I'd love to say it's not all about money. For some, it's not I suppose. But who wants to financially support someone else? WTF? | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 1:18:07 AM | Income does help a lot...
An uglyA man in a Ferrari is the most handsome man in the world;
An ugly woman in a Ferrari is just another ugly woman. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 8:51:39 AM | just an observation to those who felt it incumbent upon them to assault softgrass' viewpoint; I did not interpret her comments to mean that she intended to seek marriage and family as a means of economic survival. I took her comments to mean that she was not going to continue doing "dutch treat" DATES, because she perceives that her willingness to share the economic burden of dating isn't doing her a DAMN BIT OF GOOD. Apparently even the precaution of paying her own way is not a significant deterrent to male expectations of post date sex. It can be true that a notable number of men tend to attach more "value" to the woman they had to pursue, the woman who expected them to pick up the tab for the date.
As to the societal expectation that the male partner bears the bulk of financial responsibility for his family, it may very well be "unfair', but that's still how the cookie tends to crumble.
But I did not interpret softgrass comments as a declaration of her intent to make marriage a career goal,rather I took her post to mean she was going to change her DATING style from paying her own tab/'dutch treat' to the more traditional "man pursues, man asks for date, man pays the tab". I'd be interested to hear how that works...because there is STILL a strong school of thought,with both male and female daters, that it's the man's responsibility to pursue the object of his interest and to handle the financial ramifications of that pursuit. I'm not speaking out either for or against that premise, simply observing that it is still a significant 'school of thought'.
Cindy O | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 9:07:03 AM |
screw that, from now on, if he won't pay for me, i don't want to see him again
So what are you going to do for him ? He's going to pay for you, take care of you...spend money on you... Just for what ? What's the barter here ? Just for your company ?
- I tell you right now, with that attitude you better be reeeeeaaallll goooooooood in bed, and I mean 10/10.... Otherwise you're SOL...
Just Sayin'
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 10:25:52 AM | | For Men it is about income because of Tradition which states that Man are the main financial provider. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 2:10:07 PM | In regards to the whole issue of who pays for a date I enjoy taking a woman out and paying for it as do most guys I'm pretty sure. I have way bigger fish to fry, I just think it's lame when women have a specific numerical income requirement. Then they whine about not being able to find a good man. It's their fault, they actually can find a good man if they would put the gold miners pick away. They bypass all the good men for superficial reasons. Don't try to say men are superficial when it comes to looks either because women worry about looks just as much as men do. The only women that don't are the gold diggers that plan on divorcing the rich old fat bald guy they married anyway. The only time you see an attractive woman with an unattractive guy is if he has money. Personality is NEVER the reason.
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 9:55:32 PM | | Dating is about income ONLY if you draw attention to it and let it become an issue. Work on BEING CHARMING, INTRIGUING AND ROMANTIC and income won't become a main factor. Now in some cases, no matter what you do, it may still become a factor. It has never been much of one for me (at least I haven't let it). If a woman DOES makes a big deal out of what I do and how much I make in the beginning, then she's shallow and isn't for me. And I have no problems expressing that. Saves me a shitload of headaches. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 10:03:47 PM | | Now I must also add, I'm not making excuses for certain people either. I'm not advocating lazy, unambitious, no drive, slacking, unemployed bums out there trying to date with nothing to offer (for her or himself as well). After all, you can't blame a woman for not wanting to acquire a financial and sometimes emotional burden. I'm talking about the decent men who may not be rich, but still financially relevant. The ones who often get overlooked in a woman's quest for "Mr. Perfect". | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 10:19:30 PM | Well they'll pass it all off as looking for Mr Right. And they may be telling the truth.
Truth is though, Mr Right works out to:
Mr.
Robust
Income
Gets
Her
Twitchy (or Twat...either or)
So they're telling the truth in their own way. We just have to learn to read between the lines...
It really IS about Mr Right. | |
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| Dating is all about income
Posted: 9/21/2009 10:36:11 PM | Everyone has their priorities. For some women, that priority is income. For others, that priority is physical appearance. For still others the priority is something deeper. I agree, most women SAY it is something deeper, but it is only actually true for a percentage.
So guys, if your experience is that women only care about income, then you should recognize that though that may be a common trait amongst women, it is not a universal truth. If you believe it is, then you are either very inexperienced, very cynical, or very adept at attracting only that type of woman. So perhaps you should ask yourself, 'how do I attract the type of woman I want' ????
And the next time a woman asks you what you do for a living, can you just make the assumption she is trying to make conversation? If it is something else, that is her prerogative or her problem, whatever. If you don't create a habit of expecting the best of a person, then when you do run into that uncommon woman, you will rightfully scare her off with your suspicious and cynical attitude. Now there are women who for some reason are attracted to men who think little of women in general, demean them, are suspicious of them, and generally treat them with disrespect. If that's the kind of woman you want, there are plenty of them out there with no self image at all, so just keep doing what you're doing, I'm sure it will work fine for you.
Mature and experienced women will tell you that a man can have a great income, and be very stingy with it, and that a man of modest means can be very generous. Some women will tolerate anything in a man if he is rich, and some men will tolerate anything in a woman if she is smokin' hot. These people deserve each other. Do you want to be with that kind of person? If so, then stop complaining, get rich and buy your superficial pseudo-relationship. If not, then stop complaining and figure out how to attract the type of person you desire. There are rich people of high character, and there are hot women of high character. There are poor people who are scumbags, and poor people who have some of the richest character traits on earth. FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT - STOP FOCUSING ON WHAT YOU DISLIKE.
Instead of complaining about the flaws of others, work on improve yourself. Improve your attitude. Focus on how to not to just treat others the way you want to be treated, but figure out how to treat others the way they want to be treated. And do it without expecting anything back.
Now it is true that marriages where the man makes less than the woman have a higher divorce rate. But this thread is about dating. Also, what less experienced people don't realize is income is transient -- it can come and go. But character traits? Well, you're pretty much stuck with them. Purchased women will eventually resent their buyer. Men who have purchased women will eventually resent their purchase. Intelligent people who want to have a happy life will avoid this trap.
None of this is meant to say that a man's ability to care for himself and those he loves should be unimportant. Guys, you know how many leeches women have to fight off? Men and women work hard for their independence, and none should allow themselves to be yoked up with a person that will drag them down. But there are many ways a person can be dragged down, and income or lack thereof is not necessarily the deciding factor....
Intelligent women will recognize traits of success in a man and realize that as a team they can conquer things that as individuals they have yet been able to. There is a reason such women are called UNCOMMON. OK?
Really, whether you have a lot of money or not, do you really want a woman who makes that her top priority? Get over it. Some women are lesbians, are you mad at them too? | |
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