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| Can you be friends with someone who wants more with you?
Posted: 2/27/2008 6:49:40 PM | | I have many male friends that I'm not interested in. If they have a thing for me, I just tell them that I'm a lesbian.. that way they know that anything sexual happening between us is completely out of the question. It's dishonest but definately effective for destroying any expectations they might have. | |
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| Can you be friends with someone who wants more with you?
Posted: 2/27/2008 7:08:00 PM | A lot of people do this. You might like him back one day, but naturally he will be onto the next crush.
As for me, I've only known one person that wanted me and I didn't want them. It was sad, she was just so charming, happy, wonderful and great. However I wasn't attracted to her in the slightest. I had to pry her away from me a lot of times. It just got sad that she was so great, but I didn't want her at all. So I had to stop being friends with her and avoid her.
I've always fallen for people that didn't like me back. Then a year later they say they like me or they've grown to want me. Coincidentally it's always when I've moved on to liking the next person. | |
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| Can you be friends with someone who wants more with you?
Posted: 2/27/2008 8:21:32 PM | Yes, definitely. However, when the time comes that he finds a partner, it's best to let go.
A guy once asked me to marry him. I explained that I could not be helping him with his business if he will continue to pursue me. We agreed to be just friends. Things are actually much better because we are closer and no more expectations and jealousies. I told him that I would be gone when he finds a girl. It is but fair to the girl. | |
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| Can you be friends with someone who wants more with you?
Posted: 9/19/2008 10:06:37 PM | There are no 'mixed messages' in my humble opinion; just the stubborn refusal to believe the person who says they don't want more than friendship. We look for anything, no matter how far-fetched, to support our preference for holding onto a hope that (s)he 'loves me, (s)he just doesn't know it yet'.
It doesn't matter what we think they might 'secretly' want but are too afraid to realize it. That's not our responsibility.
If the other person is not saying they want more, we are free from any burden of guessing they were just hoping we would figure it out.
I don't do hints, so until somebody DIRECTLY, VERBALLY admits he wants to be closer, I don't torment myself with thoughts that he's wishing I would 'read between the lines'. | |
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