| men don't listen
Posted: 6/21/2006 11:50:47 PM | Actually, I get paid for listening.. No joke
I work with music..
So I am all ears.. :)
I think is good to listen to people talk and express themselves. Listening and understanding is how bonds
become strong. Communication...
And.. some men don't listen..some women don't listen... I don't think this is a gender issue. | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/22/2006 4:10:34 AM | If you expent men to listen then
- don't mumble
- don't say one thing when you mean another
- don't expect them to understand things that only you can understand
- don't make world issues over trivalities or when you really have an issue they will trivialise that one too. | |
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errnst
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Joined: 3/21/2005
Msg: 53 | |
| men don't listen
Posted: 6/22/2006 4:28:12 AM | it is possible to listen too much.... everyone wants to be heard, but does everyone want to listen?
i say it goes both ways, men and women can be bad listeners, they can also be bad speakers and slowly teach everyone not to listen to them
i dont have a problem listening to my lovers ideas, and i can listen to their assertions about their feelings, but when I smell manipulative chatter, i tune out, cuz that stuff is just disrespectful | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/22/2006 5:21:40 AM | it's true many a time I have given a guy I care about information he should really process about what I like or things I care about and it seems to go in one ear and out the other hahaha xjx  | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/22/2006 11:34:49 PM | | I think most men hear and listen to what they are interested in. I'm not just talking about SEX. See I got your attention. We do need to be stimulated intellectually also ladies. When we, just like you ladies, go out for a goodtime on the town, we're on the prowl. Most of the time weare the hunters and you're the prey, but sometimes the roles are reversed. And that's just like the communication thing. now we need to talk and you need to listen, it goes both ways I guess, but its mostly us, the men, who just don't listen. | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/22/2006 11:57:02 PM | Listening. Hrmm...Are you sure you aren't referring to also listening to non-verbal communication? Someone needs to help explain that to me. And if you are at BBQ or other public like function, sometimes it is hard to listen when the noise from the music gets too loud, or too many people are talking. I'd gladly listen, just get me into a nice quiet room where we can discuss things.
You know it is an interesting thing, I have a relative who wants no sympathy when I respond to her e-mails. It makes it very confusing how to show that I'm listening. And then if I refer to something similar to what she is talking about in the e-mail that is reference to something I experienced, that seems selfish to her. I make an effort give eye contact, though that's the tricky party in e-mails, there is no eye contact to give! About the only appropriate response I've understood to a sob story is an "I'm sorry to hear that." What other responses show that one is listening? | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 7:26:45 AM | | Listening goes both ways. I've always listened. But when she could care less to what's on my heart or mind because it doesn't improve her ****ing standing in the eyes of "the important poeple" then why should I still listen to her? But I still do. Sorry if I'm griping too much here...just a wee bit bitter. | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 7:31:34 AM | "You know it is an interesting thing, I have a relative who wants no sympathy when I respond to her e-mails. It makes it very confusing how to show that I'm listening. And then if I refer to something similar to what she is talking about in the e-mail that is reference to something I experienced, that seems selfish to her. I make an effort give eye contact, though that's the tricky party in e-mails, there is no eye contact to give! About the only appropriate response I've understood to a sob story is an "I'm sorry to hear that." What other responses show that one is listening?" - cartographer
Every time a man here's a problem, we want to fix it. We discuss it with our guy friends, work out a solution and we're done. Women, most of the time aren't looking to have the guy in their lives fix the issue. They're looking for some one who will listen to them vent, pay attention to the details of it and for 98-99% of the converstaion, let the words that are spoken only be her. It's funny how women solve a problem by venting. I don't know how they do it, but it's a gift we men lack. Don't try to understand it gents. Don't try to fix every problem. Just let her know you are there whenever she needs to talk and you're willing to allow her to put nearly 100% of the words in on the conversation. | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 8:05:22 AM | | I THINK THIS IS A BLATANT DISPLAY OF SUCKING UP TO THE WOMEN. Smart women won't respect you for it. You are welcome to the women that think this drivel is sweet and sincere. | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 8:08:36 AM | I think it's because their Mom's told them if they listened they'd get cauliflower ears... errrr... or wait.. maybe that was listening to loud music.. I forget now.  | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 8:14:11 AM | Ladies, am I right or wrong?
^^^ absolutely....its all in between the lines..LISTEN to what woman say an not just hear what they are syaing..big difference. | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 8:23:47 AM |
"You have two ears, but only one mouth, use them proportionately..."
This might be the case, but I contend that the ears are so you can hear two things at once, like the woman talking to you, and the approaching train. When disaster is imminent, stop listening and act.
And now a very old and slightly naughty joke. Know why women talk so much and men are so smart?
Because women have four lips and men have two heads. | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 9:03:20 AM | I totally agree with you, I am a very good listener(one of the few); however you have to find the women who are willing to talk to you first and so far PoF is pretty dissapointing. | |
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canali
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Joined: 4/11/2006
Msg: 67 | |
| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 9:25:42 AM | Hey, I listen ALOT on dates: why talk about myself conquering the world when I listen to myself talking of such 24/7? LOL? Seriously!...sometimes I might listen TOO much to a woman, but I'm always asking informative questions, because you have a new body in front of you, a new universe of experiences, values, ideas...that's pretty cool.
By the way, when I'm with any new male friend/colleague, I tend to do the same, so it's not just with the women....and 'tis not like I don't have any interests (LOL) or education...just like I said at the beginning: although I'm very opinionated and even intense, I also like to listen when with someone new...and even later on, too....of course if I'm getting my butt kicked verbally I'm prone like everyone else to shut down and 'not listen' so well for some strange reason ;) | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 11:45:56 AM | "I THINK THIS IS A BLATANT DISPLAY OF SUCKING UP TO THE WOMEN. Smart women won't respect you for it. You are welcome to the women that think this drivel is sweet and sincere."
That just proved I am smart because I was the third post and (I did not buy it).
Sparti the crazy: I'm not silly, Athletic funny just proved I am smart!
~*Flavia*~ | |
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 3:52:11 PM | Trishnaa -close to being the youngest on this thread and probably one that is not blinded.....smart......
Men don't listen? Give your head a shake :) - sounds like you are just sharing some of your new life experiences with everyone.....which is great -thankyou, I appreciate this, but please don't put all men in the same category of non listeners.
You say, "Throughout my 35 for life yrs I have learn one valuable thing about women, they love you to listen to them..." I am glad you learned this and truly hope you find yourself a wonderful woman that appreciates what you have learned.
Yes, listening is important for a meaningful conversation
Of course opinions vary!
0:)
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 4:10:05 PM | | i wasnt paying attention or listening what was said again | |
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canali
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Joined: 4/11/2006
Msg: 73 | |
| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 4:29:44 PM | by the way, most of the guys I know listen...don't generalize again...we're not some foreign species from another planet....we have to be in the mood, first of all...i,e, if we're tired, forgetabouit!...timing, ladies, is everything!
Guys often PRETEND that they don't listen...we just like to pull your cranks....makes for great sex
Plus I have to listen alot in my profession (or I'm toast!)...so I guess it's a necessarily acquired habit.
Hey, there Trishnaa...always kicking my butt and keeping me in my place...that's the gal!
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| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 4:53:26 PM | Nah...Canali..I was just being the monkey in the middle of cats and dogs.
Was just teasing ya.Thanks though. Also thanks to BK2, that was sweet.
~*Flavia*~ | |
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a37064
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Joined: 11/22/2005
Msg: 75 | |
| men don't listen
Posted: 6/23/2006 5:27:24 PM | When a woman talks to a man, we tend to try to fix the problem.
You have great understanding, they just want us to listen.
T | |
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