| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/23/2006 7:05:58 AM | | i have depression and i take meds for it..it's not something i go around hiding cuz a lot of people have it..and plus it's not like a cold and i can get rid of it..and what's the big deal anyway..? if someone isn't gonna like me or wanna talk to me cuz i have depression,..then they aren't worth my time anyway. having depression is just part of who i am.. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/24/2006 9:18:54 PM | Jenni, I appreciate your posts. I, too, wonder do people expect me to present a list of all ailments and medications upon the first meet? or would that be the first email? or the first phone convo? When am I considered "hiding" my personal business? I give those lists to my DOCTOR. He needs them! A stranger I have just met does not. Just because I have not revealed EVERY SINGLE THING about me does NOT make me a liar! It makes me prudent. If I see that we are developing a friendship and establishing trust between us, in that you are sharing personal information with me, I will most certainly reciprocate. If you call and ask if I can meet you for lunch on Friday and I tell you no, I have a doctor's appointment, I will tell you why, IF YOU ASK and I think you are sincere in wanting to know, rather than just curious.
As for "everyone" suffering from depression at one time or another? If you are suffering from depression, GO TO A DOCTOR! Depression can be a fatal disease. It is NOT feeling sad, or blue, or unhappy. It is more like *Sometimes life su cks and sometimes life su cks much!* How do I know? Because I have suffered with Clinical Severe Depression Recurrent since I was 14. I'll do the math for you so you don't have to check the profile, that's 40 years. I wasn't fortunate enough to have gotten appropriate treatment until 16 years ago. I expect to be on meds till I die. And as someone already said, they work for awhile and then they have to be changed. Do I quit taking them? I did once. That was enough to convince me not to do it again.
Do I walk around all gloom and doom with a black cloud over my head? Not usually. In fact, I'm known for my smile and good humour even in spite of difficult circumstances. So I guess you would say I "hide" it well. Actually, I'm just trying to fake it til I make it. Those closest to me know I suffer with depression, especially when I have a severe episode. That would include a partner, but not necessarily a first date. There are a lot of things that come up in the natural course of conversation as two people get to know one another. I am open about many things that others would not talk about, but only when I'm ready or think it is necessary for one reason or another. Instead of thinking of it as lying or hiding some terrible secret, why not just accept that each person has a right to disclose as much or as little as they feel comfortable telling. When you prove yourself trustworthy, you are trusted with more. Granted, by the time a relationship reaches a physically intimate stage, you both ought to know each other very, very well in other ways (mentally, emotionally, medically, etc.). But until then, give each other a break. Getting to know people takes time. Spend it wisely.
HT | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/24/2006 9:34:37 PM | | I'd run for the hills, cuz quite frankly I have my own obstacles in life, I don't need to be somebody else's counsellor. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/24/2006 9:36:39 PM | I totally agree with Jenni.....you are so on the money with everything you said.....
Are we supposed to tell the guy our life history before we meet? Geesh, get a grip people. Its a first date.......if things progress into a full-blow relationship, then sure personal issues can be talked about. But before that point, no way. Why tell some guy that you may never even see again (or see for a couple weeks)about your personal issues.....
And I will also say that depression is an illness, just like diabetes is.....its a chemical imbalance and can be treated. I bet 1/2 the people you know are on meds of some sort, but you would never know that unless you asked them.
Try reading up on it sometime. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/24/2006 9:39:28 PM | It can be pretty nasty, but when a person can come out of it, it's all good. The things they have seen, felt... it can make them more than anyone else. I dated a girl who was depressed... but she was brilliant... i stayed with her for as long as possible but break-ups happen, I have no regrets with her. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/24/2006 9:44:36 PM | It's almost natural to hide a not-so-pretty fact for anyone. "Head cases" are the people to whom appearances matter most - for that obvious reasons. That label is one of them. If my date has beat the fear of discovery, she's conquered the biggest hurdle. It's when they drop the meds it gets scary.
Steve | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 1:34:24 AM | Depression. Ha! That's nothing. Try bipolar disorder. (I have that and even mention it in my profile) If you dig a person what does it matter? It's just another thing they have to deal with every day. True love is finding someone who is compassionate. And if you if want that in someone, then show the same compassion to them for this " hidden disorder". Stuff like this can affect things sometimes but I've met some amazing people who happen to suffer from depression, OCD, anxiety, bipolar disorder, phobias, etc. If I had cut them off just beause of that, I would have missed out on some great people. Sometimes, people are afraid to say up front that they have this stuff because they don't want to scare others away. So, they want you to get to know "them" first before dropping the "depression bomb" right away. Otherwise, you might split before even giving them a chance.
At the end of the day, it ain't no thing.  | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 2:09:13 AM | | people seem to look at those with disorders as freaks of nature when in all fact they are actually pretty cool people..i was friends with a guy who was schizoprhenic but as i said above you start to wonder whether your friends or they want your counselling. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 2:32:29 AM | | I wouldn't make a snap judgement about any illness someone suffered from without first knowing the details,hinderances(if there were any),side effects of said illness. To do otherwise would simply show one's ignorance. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 2:41:10 AM |
Would you continue to see them?
or
Would you run for the hills?
Everyone has a right to be depressed now and then, AND THE FACT that they are taking meds for it says they are a conscious person who is wanting to do something about it.
THEY ARE A KEEPER. | |
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allh2h
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Joined: 3/23/2006
Msg: 87 | |
| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 3:44:21 AM |
Everyone has a right to be depressed now and then, AND THE FACT that they are taking meds for it says they are a conscious person who is wanting to do something about it.
THEY ARE A KEEPER.
 You are so sweet! We are keepers | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 2:57:05 PM | | I have a question to all who say... no problem to living with someone who is a CHRONIC...noted..the word CHRONIC depressive. Have you ever lived for ..oh lets say 15 years with this person?.. If so and you can deal with it.. God bless you. I did and had to leave.......as I mentioned before it is such a roller coaster ride.. and I want off. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 3:21:00 PM | I am going to get raked over the coals for saying what I'm about to say. This thread is a politically correct sob story. It amazes me how much psychiatry has destroyed our society. And how they have succeeded in filling the minds of the masses with their lies. What is most disturbing is how it has become accepted as normal by millions to take these mind altering brain damaging psycho-tropic drugs. They are drugs not medications.
It should be noted that psychiatrists VOTE mental illnesses into existance and then place them into their bible the DSM. It is sad how these people make without exageration, billions of dollars in profits off of human emotions with their fraudulant medical quackery. Everything is for sale these days. Trauma is big bucks for these people.
Depression is a human emotion. Not a disease as the shrinks have lead you to believe. No more than "happiness" could ever be called a disease. Of course common sense and the truth mean nothing right? All that matters is what people read in the paper and what their money grubbing Doctor tells them.
Saddness is part of life. The only answer for it is found within you.
Would I date someone who has had it put in their heads that they suffer from a "medical condition of depression" that is beyong their control. Absolutely not! I'd run so fast it wouldn't even be funny. Just like I'm about to run from the people in this thread and never come back! | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 6:00:27 PM |
I am going to get raked over the coals for saying what I'm about to say. This thread is a politically correct sob story. It amazes me how much psychiatry has destroyed our society. And how they have succeeded in filling the minds of the masses with their lies. What is most disturbing is how it has become accepted as normal by millions to take these mind altering brain damaging psycho-tropic drugs. They are drugs not medications.
It should be noted that psychiatrists VOTE mental illnesses into existance and then place them into their bible the DSM. It is sad how these people make without exageration, billions of dollars in profits off of human emotions with their fraudulant medical quackery. Everything is for sale these days. Trauma is big bucks for these people.
Hmmm, these talking points sound familiar: are you really Tom Cruise?
Depression is a human emotion. Not a disease as the shrinks have lead you to believe. No more than "happiness" could ever be called a disease. Of course common sense and the truth mean nothing right? All that matters is what people read in the paper and what their money grubbing Doctor tells them.
Saddness is part of life. The only answer for it is found within you.
I think you're looking in the wrong dictionary; depression, as addressed in this forum, is not an emotion such as sadness.
Your simplistic characterizations reveal a lack of comprehension for the continuum of complexities of underlying causes and interrelating symptoms that can be components of any given person's experience.
I pray you never experience any illness; I also pray you grow out of your true believer phase before you hurt someone with what is quite likely well intended, but dangerously uninformed, zeal.
Your passion would be so beneficial actually doing something such as visiting the sick and feeding the homeless. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 6:42:36 PM | Bravo SoggyDog! I think you're right on the money with the Tom Cruise jab! LOL, let scientology be with you! LOL.....I guess Brooke Shields was just "faking" her post-partum depression.....NOT!
Oh well, ignorance is bliss for most people! | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 7:01:45 PM | I have nothing to do with Scientology or Tom Cruise.
Aside from that, ya ignorance is bliss isn't it razzberry1.
But hey I will let you get back to abusing children by feeding them ritalin which gives them life long medical conditions such as tourettes symptoms. Not to mention the bogus life liong stigmatization the child will live with from having been labeled as "mentally ill".
Oh poor you, and all the millions like you that are so messed up in your little heads that you are convinced you have chemical imbalances of the brain. Eeeeek, eeeek hurry and rush to your Doctor before you die of this disease that is supposedly more deadly than cancer. Hurry before you die razzberry1!!!!
On the subject of "faking". Uh, yea kind of like how millions of child rapists get fraudulent shrinks to testify that they have the "disease of pedophelia" that makes them uncontrollably rape children. People like you make my skin crawl. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 7:10:20 PM |
But hey I will let you get back to abusing children by feeding them ritalin which gives them life long medical conditions such as tourettes symptoms
Ritalin does NOT cause Tourrettes. I would know, I have it. And I was never on Ritalin. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 7:11:18 PM | Animal -
Just wondering where you got your medical license from? Or rather, which crackerjack box.
Now stick to your word in your original post and don't come back to this thread. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 7:19:43 PM | Ok people, depression is NOT, I repeat, IS not like a cold where you can just take meds and it go away. Meds are there to give you time to seek someway of coping with the depression (WHICH THERE ARE MANY FORMS) on a daily basis with a clear/clearer head. NOW with that said all meds don't work so it could take a LONG TIME of tweaking the medication so it is the RIGHT one/ones.
It takes internal fortitude, a strong spirit and A WILLINGNESS to try to get better. Without this you are doing nothing but feeding yourself drugs to numb the pain. Not everyone can do this, this is why there is therapy. Therapy is not there to CURE you, its there to help you find a different way of dealing with your life, different ways of coping with your depressive state.
I truly believe, other than BI-POLAR or serious Mental Disorders, depression can be treated in many cases and eliminated with discipline. Mind over matter, wax on wax off, etc etc. It takes along time for some and a short time for others...it just all depends on each individuals circumstances.
its also all about your environment, your support network *family, friends, spouse*, faith (not necc GOD per sey but some sort of faith, even if its just believing you can get better).
Now with all that B.S. said. We have to remember its the HUMAN brain, the most complex, most important, most used organ of our body!!! So many things contribute to its healthy well being. Diet, lifestyle, genetics, environment you live in.
Basically my point is, do you run for the hills? Who the hell knows, its all up to the indivudual dealing with the person who has the depression. If they are not understanding, compassionate, patient...then FORGET IT...be honest with the person and let them go. It is totaly up to the person who is co-exsisting with the depressed person to find out and understand. www.depression.com is a good place to start. Now, i dont profess to be some master or something at it, this is just my experience with it...
i can write alot more...but ill leave it at that for now. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 7:20:39 PM |
I have a question to all who say... no problem to living with someone who is a CHRONIC...noted..the word CHRONIC depressive. Have you ever lived for ..oh lets say 15 years with this person?.. If so and you can deal with it.. God bless you. I did and had to leave.......as I mentioned before it is such a roller coaster ride.. and I want off.
Each person has to make the choice of what's best for them...and if the person you were living with wasn't getting any help, then your only choices were to make them get help, live with it, or leave. I just went through a year with a parent who was dying of lung cancer; it wasn't fun, it wasn't pretty, many times it was frustrating, and often scary...but I never once thought of abandoning, not them even when they didn't want to help themself anymore.
Depression is a human emotion. Not a disease as the shrinks have lead you to believe. No more than "happiness" could ever be called a disease. Of course common sense and the truth mean nothing right? All that matters is what people read in the paper and what their money grubbing Doctor tells them.
Saddness is part of life. The only answer for it is found within you.
Would I date someone who has had it put in their heads that they suffer from a "medical condition of depression" that is beyong their control. Absolutely not! I'd run so fast it wouldn't even be funny. Just like I'm about to run from the people in this thread and never come back!
Another post from the vastly uninformed. There are many natural human emotions; depression isn't one of them. Sure, sadness is a part of life, and without it, how would one be able to appreciate happiness? But depression is not something doctors made up; in fact, it's something many doctors haven't understood for years and some even thought it was 'in people's heads'. Also, depression is no longer beyond one's control; people with depression are being helped everyday. But it's attitudes likes yours that have made it harder for people to admit they have depression in the first place and to seek help for it; it's that same attitude that prevented doctors from figuring out what depressionm was for so many years. Luckily, most people have the common sense to research an issue before opening their mouths about it and showing their complete lack of comprehension about it. t's just too bad that such ignorance as yours can't be fixed as easily...because usually those who are this ignorant will never admit it nor bother to attempt to learn anything. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 7:36:37 PM | The good thing about threads like this is that all the "mentally ill" wacko's come out of the wood work saying "Yes, i'm mental, please feel sorry for me". Which lets everyone on POF know who the sick mental cases are. Which is great, since to answer the threads original question, the answer is NO, nobody wants to date or be in a relationship with all you whiney "sick in the head" people. And YES anybody with a brain will run like crap from someone that reveals they have mental problems.
As for research you might want to research the hundreds of websites that expose the fraud and dangers of Zoloft and ritalin, psychiatry and "mental health". Welcome to the Prozac nation and the age of idiocy. Now go watch Fraser on t.v. or bore yourselves to death with some Sigmund Freud garbage reading. | |
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| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 7:57:43 PM |
Just like I'm about to run from the people in this thread and never come back!
Huh...and here I thought you'd still be running, lol. Silly me...when I know ignorance will never disappear ;)
Actually, I believe the forums are a great way to learn about someone, as who they really are usually comes through...point in fact, you. Obviously you can only see one side of a situation, and don't bother to take the time to learn anything but what you think is 'right'. Sure, there are dangers to Zoloft, Ritalin, etc., just as there are dangers to antibiotics and Viagra...yet you don't see that stopping people from taking the latter medications if they can help them. Personally, I'd much rather have something that can be helped, whether it's by use of a prescription, herbal remedies, etc., than to be ignorant and have the lack of desire to learn more than what I simply believe to be 'right'. | |
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Spelly
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Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 100 | |
| A hidden truth.. Depression...
Posted: 6/25/2006 8:28:31 PM | I've had it. Animal, I hope you find out personally how wrong you are.I have never presented myself as "I'm mental, feel sorry for me". If you read my posts and those from many others, you'll see that we've tried to illustrate how we are living successful lives while controlling our diseases.
I don't need to research anything. Research is for when you don't know anything about the topic. I know all to well that it's real. Too bad you have been able to learn anything from those who have been honest about their experiences with such illnesses.
Interesting too that had you spewed forth such thoughts about gays it would've been deleted. | |
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