| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 8/31/2006 7:49:55 PM | BTW - with regards to my photo..... You can like it or lump it... I don't care! And I say that with a smile. :)
DeAnNe | |
|
bobby7
|
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 177 | |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 8/31/2006 8:04:15 PM | Deanne, with all due respect, I have put my personal preferences in my profile.
I do not wish to upset anyone, but I feel it is just fair to have someone read them and choose to respond or not.
I always answer my email, I just don't want to have someone mail me and have to tell them that I am not interested..
I did this to avoid misunderstandings, not to create them..  | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 8/31/2006 9:01:39 PM | Maybe you should say " you people" instead of "you women".. "you guys" do the same thing. it is not a gender problem, it's a people problem | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 8/31/2006 9:19:25 PM | Bobby, are you saying you are interested in everyone who writes you or what do you do whan you are not. I do try to write everone back, if I am totally not interested I just say I have started to see someone.
Back to the subject, I think it is all a question of honesty. Who wants to start off a possible relationship with someone who is not honest. It sure won't stop with the photo. I can't say I have met a lot of people who posted old photos. I have met some. Probably the biggest problem I have seen is ones with no photos. Like one gal who listed her weight as average. I have had gals say most people are overweight so that make me average. Sure a little with a little that might be fine. That last time that happend to me the gal was 5'1 and 185 pounds. I ended up dropping her before the first meeting. Not because she weighed 185 pounds, but because I did not think she had been honest about it.
I never really thought much about the old photo bit but I seem to have a lot of people think my photos are old which they are not so perhaps reading this thread lets me realize how common that problem is. I agree, it is not a problem with gals. It is not a problem with guys. It is a problem with people. I just can't see where they would gain anything with old photos except the illusion they are appealing to people. | |
|
bobby7
|
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 180 | |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 8/31/2006 9:24:11 PM | I only respond to people with photos, to begin with, Turboguy, and I respond to each and every mail I get..
So far, it seems to work well, and I have not hurt any feelings (that I am aware of).
I have no problem with BBWs, I know a lot of them.
But I choose not to look for a BBW as a partner.
I would tell them my feelings, instead of telling them I have found someone else.
I hope they would understand, and I feel this would be better than them seeing me in the pond the next day, still fishing.
I hope that this trend will continue.. | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 8/31/2006 9:44:35 PM | Honesty is the best policy in my opinion. I checked some people's profile and it said average for weight, and I had "a few extra pounds" on mine, and they looked about my size, so I changed it to average, then thought about it and changed it back. I know I have a little extra weight, although not obese yet, LOL.. I could stand to lose maybe 20 lbs. Damn spaghetti,  Anyway, I would not want people to think I was trim and fit, and then meet them and have them  That would be more degrading to me than being honest about it!
| |
|
bobby7
|
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 182 | |
| |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 5:06:01 AM | Bobby, you would tell them your feelings, You wouldn't lie. Actually here I just had the first one that I have written a nice note and lied to her (told her I had started to see somene else) Now the situation was I got a short message from a gal, much older than me who was probably a wonderful person, but was really ugly. I don't like to say negative things too much so I don't want to dwell on that part. So you are saying you would write back to this person and just say you were not interested because she is ugly or did I misunderstand you.
Back on topic. I am sure a lot of us have a hard time knowing how to list our weight range. when I see average I am mentally prepaired for 20-30 pounds over what would be ideal, maybe a few more. My own weight will fluctuate perhaps 20 pounds. Basically I diet, loose it, go off for a break, put it on, go on a diet...... I don't know that I am prepaired for 80 pounds over or a photo that is 20 years old. I still don't see what people hope to gain. I guess they think you will see thier inner person and forget the lie they perpetrated. Well, guys are a little more visual than gals so maybe it might work with a woman but I think for the most part we are all going to be first turned off by the lie, second have a hard time develping raport with someone who has disappointed us by not being the person we expected them to be. | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 6:03:22 AM | turboguy!!! You don't have to tell someone they are ugly! Just tell them that you aren't interested. LOL!! I agree, a photo that is 20 years old would be hard to deal with, and lying about your age isn't good. I think most women would agree with this.
| |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 6:22:42 AM | If the photo was an arrest picture, from the police station, then I would be worried.
Pretty much everyone, wants to have an appealing photo image. Recent and representative, though, is more honest.
Bottom line:
If you meet someone, whose appearance is not satisfactory to you, you do not have to see them again. | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 6:40:31 AM | hey turbo!!! come on now!! .. if you aren't interested .. you arent interested .. why is redundant .. and i'm sure bobby would never tell a soul they are ugly!!! he said honest not brutal!... i am of the mind that "ugly" isnt represented by a pic anyway .. ugly represents itself in words.. attitudes.. behaviours .. a person may appear to "look" like a real gem .. inside .. nuthin .. nuthin but cold black coal!! blahblahblah ..
the pic? .. i figure its important to have one .. a recent one that hopefully represents me .. you .. whoever is attached to it .. But Not everyone is photogenic! .. some look better in person .. some look better in pics .. whatever! .. i do figure its important though that the pic be "honest" .. if it is 20 years old .. well .. none of us are what we were 20 years ago! .. hell i've improved with age!!! (and i refuse to clean that mirror!!) .. anyway .. for me its all about honesty .. i've seen pics of David Hasselhoff .. and i've seen one pic that at least 3 guys are using!! eeek .. i've seen headless pics .. and pics i've lost my head over! .. pics are not the person .. but .. a fake pic does indicate the sincerity of the poster! ..
the pics that bother me .. are the ones with kids .. i know y'all want to show off your pride and joy .. but there are some pretty sick minds online .. and i personally would not want to be responsible for what they can do to an innocent pic!!! .. its hard for a "normal" brain to fathom how a pedophile can destroy an innocent pic .. but believe me .. they can!.. anyway i don't want to end on that note .. but i did have to mention my feelings on it ..
my shell.. my exterior .. all the hair .. thebellybutton .. blahblahblah .. all illusion .. they are as much "me" as my old apartment .. i only live here ..
wanda | |
|
bobby7
|
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 187 | |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 7:32:08 AM | "Bobby, you would tell them your feelings, You wouldn't lie".
"I have read your profile and seen your photo, and, while you are an attractive womanI do not find that certain 'spark; that I am looking for. It might be me..lol
Could we, perhaps, mail each other for a while, so that we can get to know each other better. I may have missed something."
I get one mail back, saying something like.." Thanks for your honesty. Perhaps we can mail'
Then I wait..So far, every one has mailed me back..After two or three mails, if I do nor mention the 'spark', the mail peters out..
No hard feelings, it seems, because I am still talking to them in the forums..I haven't heard:
"But, I really thought he liked me" of "How could he lie?", because I haven't lied. I have just, politely, let them know that I am not interested in pursuing this further. | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 9:47:32 AM | | It just occurred to me that some of my fav people on here, don't show a photo. I guess I love them for their minds.... | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 11:24:41 AM |
Then I wait..So far, every one has mailed me back..After two or three mails, if I do nor mention the 'spark', the mail peters out..
bobby, you are one smooth operator
 | |
|
bobby7
|
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 190 | |
| |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 12:15:43 PM | | My photo is recent! Problem I find is, though most men say they want someone genuine, what they really want is someone 25 years younger. My "recent" (within the last two months) hasn't put me to be on anyone's "favorites" list. Gentlemen, I'm still waiting for one of you to follow through with your claims of wanting someone who isn't playing games, who is honest and loving and wants to have a "real" relationship! | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 12:36:05 PM | | I really have to agree with you. Shoot! It's hard enough to find someone my age who is still alive let alone interested in the real me. You are quite a bit younger than I am and let me tell you, it doesn't get any easier as the years go buy. I was hoping this might be the place to find that special man but I guess I'll just keep looking. | |
|
Smowey
|
Joined: 6/1/2006
Msg: 193 | |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 4:56:19 PM | I wish to say Thank you to those who responded to my comments. Most on here are fantastic people who are looking for friends, and maybe that special one. There are people on here who I call both online and off the PLUM people. I try to avoid them since they are so filled up with negatative vibes, and I actually pity them. Life has so much to offer, just be honest, and avoid the PLUM people.
by the way Plum people are
PLAYERS
LIARS
USERS
MANIPULATORS.
Have a great holiday weekend everyone | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 5:02:21 PM | Wow I cant letthis threadgo without commenting. First of all I will be 69 in 3 weeks. Do I look that old? Guess so, as here is a little run down on my dates.
1. Took a woman to dinner, nothing like her picture. Finally said her pics were 10 years old.
2. Met another woman for coffee. Hubby just passed away. She pulled out a piece of paper with notes on it, and one by one she proceded to ask me questions. I answered best I could and when she was done she said 'nope, you dont fit my qualifications', and she got up and walked out.
3. Took another woman out to dinner, and as I was trying to carry on a conversation she was buddy buddy with the bus boy to keep wine glass filled. Totally bombed by the time we got home. She literally fell out of the car and I did not help her to her door. Just drove off.
4. Another dinner date, tried everything to start a conversation, no way. Table manners disgusting.
5.A luncheon date. Nice facial picture posted. Average weight. Turned out to be BBW. Sorry that's not my thing.
6. Drove all the way to Dana Point to meet someone that had no pic posted. We had a nice light dinner, nice conversation, nice looking woman, but I guess the chemistry just was not what it should have been.
And by the way, none of the women were from this web site, and all of them were in my age bracket.
So am I posting the wrong type of pictures??? All of my pics were taken last month! So do I look too young, too old, or what???
Please give me an opinion. Thanks much! | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 6:23:11 PM | seekone, I am going to be perfectly honest with you. You don't seem to have a problem obtaining dates, seeing that you have had 6 of them, I don't know what the time span was, but that's not too bad
Regarding your pix, I took a good look at them.
all my pics were taken last month
Well I noticed several things about your pictures. The ones with the tan shirt, your hair was like a light brown, yet in the other ones with the white shirt, it was definitely gray, nothing wrong with that, but were they all taken a month ago? That leads me to believe they were not. Also the one in the suit, you look a few years younger, and that is fine, but you did say that ALL of them were taken last month.
I don't believe it is your looks that caused the dates to go bad. That woman who asked all those questions and then left, sorry about that, that was not right, and I hope you don't think all women are like that. Also the one who got bombed, why didn't you help her to her door? Not that you would go out with her again, but did she need help?
Date #6 seemed like a pretty good match, did you ask her out again, or did she refuse? Maybe if you got to know her, the chemistry would come. Just a thought.
There you have it, an honest opinion. By the way, I believe you look good for your age, and perhaps a couple years younger.
Maybe you need to be more choosy who you date.  | |
|
bobby7
|
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 196 | |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 6:30:51 PM | I looked at his profile, after you pointed out certain discrepancies, AW, and I agree..
He is a good lookin dude, no doubt. But the accuracies in his photos leave me wondering.
I have a digital camera. If a woman does not agree with my photo, I have mastered the art of "timed photography"..I have 10 seconds to snap a pic of me, in real time.. | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 6:35:34 PM | | Bob, my kids always told me I was a detective, could spot things pretty good, LOL. I have a digital camera too and also a webcam, which is what my pix is on here now. I don't like the webcam that much but it does get a close-up pix so used it. | |
|
Cynnie
|
Joined: 5/15/2006
Msg: 198 | |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 8:46:41 PM | We are what we are..
If someone doesn't like how I look in a photo, then the heck with them..
I know my self worth..
Reality is we all were once young and smooth and firm..and we're only gonna get saggier and baggier..so you better find someone you actually like..
not just someone that has a tight ass. | |
|
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 9:40:00 PM | I think that, too, Cynnie. And as far as I'm concerned there're a lot of people who are a bit too anxious to get as many instant meetings as they can, in as short a time period as they can. I only meet 'em if they're not in that category (I don't have any interest in meeting anxiety ridden people), and I've already got a friendly relationship with them online. In the meantime, there's webcam to determine a bit more about the person someone has been talking with about meeting.
Jeanie | |
|
bobby7
|
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 200 | |
| Photos and the older person!
Posted: 9/1/2006 9:44:40 PM | "(I don't have any interest in meeting anxiety ridden people)"
Nor do I, Ab jeanie...Just honest people, who aren't out to deceive anyone with photos of who they aren't!!!
I don't want to 'play' any more that you or Cynnie do.. | |
|
Home
login 
