| | Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?Page 3 of 3 (1, 2, 3) | Join the club!!!!!!
Actually, judging by the people I have been trying to meet, it seems that this website is overflowing with people who have been seriously hurt by past relationships. You can't blame them for being afraid, but... "Come on people!!!" if you have enough courage to post an ad, at least have a little bit more courage to respond to potential suitors who are sincere in wanting to know more about you. Paranoia is only valid if noone is willing to give you the freedom to overcome it. | |
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 11/22/2007 8:26:33 AM | But we need to be sure to differentiate online-dating from the real-world though.
Typically people at a dating site are not representing themselves as who they really are, or at least not entirely, because its so easy to create any persona one may wish to, or to see oneself in some alternate light from that which others perceive. (I.e. The Cinderella Syndrome).
Hence the games and mind-play that so many are wary of. It kind of goes with the nature of the territory, and I think that's part of what the OP was referring to.
We really don't know the person until we meet them, and usually, some time after that. Although I'd be the last to recommend dating anybody/everybody we may have some vague initial interest in, right away. Patience has a lot of merit, and works as a pretty good screening filter too, in many cases.
-Suth'nBoy 
PS: By the way, HAPPY THANKSGIVING!! 
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 12/28/2008 2:31:43 PM | "I cooked, cleaned, went grocery shoppig for him, took care of his little girl, etc. He didn't ever have to lift a finger. I couldn't figure out why he didn't want to be with me. "
Are you for real? It is such a HUGE turnoff when people are so clingy that they try to do too much too soon. Respect yourself enough to know that you shouldn't have to do all of those things to get a guy to like you! You're NOT his wife! Why would you be doing his cleaning? There is NO way in hell I would be doing a guys cleaning for him until we were at LEAST engaged or something! | |
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 12/28/2008 5:13:59 PM | | I think it's funny when women complain they can't get a date. Don't men hit on them hundreds of times a day? Even unnattractive women have their choice of men. There's just so many single men (plus the cheaters) that it's a buyers market for women. | |
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 12/28/2008 11:36:15 PM | Oh my...this is an easy one. You said.....I want to meet some intelligent guys that are looking for the same. Haha...there are none....problem solved.....
Just kidding.
You frequent places of your interest, which I assume are places which enhance intelligence such as.....libraries, computer cafe's, etc.
You also may want to take a look at your profile and get an opinion on it regarding the message you are conveying and the type of people it seems to attract.
Good luck!!!!! | |
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 12/29/2008 12:23:24 AM | The problem is you're not paying attention to your daily rutine. You don't have to go out of your way to get a date. Another problem is, this isn't the 18th centry, so its no longer the guys job to ask girls on dates. Its the 21st centry and along with your right to vote came the right to ask men and dates. Its not just our job anymore its yours too. Bars and clubs are actually some of the hardest places to get a date (if you're a guy). The reason for this is, everyone at the club or bar is there dressed to impress and their defences are up b/c they went there with the mind set to get a date.
I'm just going to take a guess at what your day looks like
-you wake up get ready for work
-leave your house for work
-stop and get gas*
-stop and get coffee somewhere*
-go to work*
-lunch rolls around so you go somewhere for lunch*
-works over you leave
-you go to the store to get stuff you need*
-you goto the vidio store to get a sad movie thats going to make you feel even worse about being single*
now anything with a * after it are all places you can get a date. Everyone needs gas, even intresting atractive men. Men also like coffee in the mornings too, so keep an eye out for them. Guys need money and I'm sure guys work with you unless its some extremely small office with 3 employees or some place that only hires women. Guys need to eat as well, look for them on lunch. You see one eating alone ask if you can join him. As long as his girlfriends not in the bathroom or in line getting food you'll be shocked to see that he's more than happy to have you sit with him. No one likes eating alone. Men go shopping to. They're always in stores. If you see one you want to talk to do it! Don't know what to say....Its easy use your eyes.
-What store are you in?
lets say its a clothing store. Go up to him and say something like "Excuse me sir, but I need to get my brother a birthday gift and you're about the same build as him. I want to get him some nice pants what size are yours?" Than you can ask where he got them and go from there.
-Whats in his cart?
If he has a cart chances are stuff in it! Anything in his cart is something to talk about! And whats even better is if its in his cart its something he likes! Guys like talking about stuff they like!
-Whats he wearing?
"Oh those are really nice shoes where did you get them?"
"thats a nice watch where did you get it?"
-Whats he looking at on the shelfs in the store?
"Hey do you like that brand of beer? Is it any good I've never had it?"
Observation is keen. Not sure if he's single? Once again use your eyes!
-does he have a wedding ring on?
-once again whats in the cart? If they're tampons chances are he's not single.
other than that you can't really tell unless you go up and start talking to them.
The best thing about talking to people while you're out on your daily rutine is chances are they're out completing their daily tasks as well. You feel confortable while your out doing your thing. So are they. They're not at the bar so their defences aren't up, neither are yours. Once you brake the ice and start having a conversation getting the phone number and a date are simple as eating pie. I'll show you:
You: "Hey is that beer any good?"
Cute guy: "Yeah I love this stuff its great!"
You: "Thats good to know I've always wanted to try it."
Cute guy: "Well if you like beer you have to try it, its the best"
You: "Well maybe if you gave me your number we could meet up somewhere and drink some together."
Cute guy: "I'd love that my numbers 555-568, I mean 558, ah um," He momentarily forgets his own number b/c he's so blown away you just asked for his number, "yeah thats right its 555-558-5585! Hope to hear from you soon"
now that conversation just took the both of you a total of 1.2 minutes and now you have a number. Than wait 1 to 2 days and call him around 9:00 to 10:00 PM. This is a great time to call b/c this is normaly when single ppl are settling down for the day getting ready to do what ever it is they do before they sleep, thinking to themselves the entire time, "man I wish I had someone to watch the reruns of friends with me" And than you call and OMG they're not alone anymore and you're a hero for the night! Than you set up your date! Try to keep the conversation short and to the point and very plesent. You don't want to talk about to much or else you'll have nothing to talk about on your date!
Just keep in mind not everyone will be as happy to talk to you as others. They might be having a bad day. They might be shallow and dismiss you. But generaly speaking humans are social beings and love getting attention from other ppl. Most will be more than happy to talk with you. Datings a game of numbers not chance. Its like gambling, You can't win if you don't play. | |
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 12/29/2008 11:14:25 AM | | I so agree with the other guy that replied with "Your a female you can date anyone" Until you have lived the life of a single guy trying to get a date, please don't complain. As a female you really don't know how well you have it when it comes to dating, you have everything working for you. I wish I had it half as easy as women do, my life would be alot less lonely. :( | |
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 12/30/2008 12:15:25 AM | - Make eye contact with people.
- Smile
- Don't stand in a way that indicates you're closing yourself off from people, which means try to relax, or at least appear relaxed.
- Don't assume people are all bad, and the first 3 suggestions will be easier to follow.
- And finally, you have to get out. Basing all your encounters with people on online introductions doesn't do much for your ability to socialize. | |
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 1/18/2009 11:55:02 PM | Dude, do you know how many lonely people there are out there? Hot men, hot women, all kinds. Being able to get a date isn't even the main issue. Those who are able to get all the dates they want can be the loneliest people out there. Seen it. The important thing is to meet the *right* people, not to meet *many* people. It's like winning a hockey game when your team has fewer shots on net - gotta make them good ones, not just more numerous. So focus on what you want. Don't just aimlessly meet as many people as you can. You'll be wiped out by the end of the first, and have no energy left to win the game.  | |
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| Why can't I get a date or meet anyone?
Posted: 6/16/2009 8:58:12 PM | | Consider going places and doing things that you think the males your looking for would be interested in. Show yourself friendly. | |
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