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| Falling in love in community or online?
Posted: 10/8/2009 11:59:30 PM | We're all human, and ther'e no age limit to making mistakes (see the beginning of this line!)
Also, a good friend doens't give direct advice, rather than helps someone to make the best decision for themselves in their situation
~sc~ | |
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| Falling in love in community or online?
Posted: 10/9/2009 6:43:47 PM |
Please don't talk of spelling or grammar....
must be unable to think very well today because I don't quite understand the opening post... the fractured thoughts.
I was just left thinking, "huh?".
Darn, I just tried again and I'm getting a headache trying to tie it all together.
Sorry. I tried.
It's not a matter of spelling or grammar; it's a matter of coherence. I don't get the OP either. Fractured thoughts as breath has said. Maybe I'll come back later and after having read more posts, will be able to figure out what the OP is asking. | |
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| Falling in love in community or online?
Posted: 10/9/2009 9:33:13 PM |
I've read a few threads and yes profiles about the ellusive "chemistry" that people are searching for (my thoughts might be more infactuation). Regardless, I've been making a choice here to look more to the forums (community) in how a person thinks to how receptive or forward I might be in getting to know that person for maybe a "longterm relationship".
I have not lost sight of my traditional upbringing in the sense of using community and some standards that were set before my time and look for the attributes that make a person ever so humble and yet strong enough to be a partner.
Gosh I dont mean to sound egotistical, I am not but with the same breath, am afraid I would rather be alone then not to be challenged and anticipate growth in a relationship. No one wants to remain static.
Ok, having said what I have above, in what ways have you measured a possible relationship and how might it have surfaced for you ? Was it based on the idea of community and what you've come to know in your history or are you walking in blindly. There is no wrong answer here. Ideas to ponder.
Please don't talk of spelling or grammar....
I believe she's speaking of old fashioned values and seeing how a potential mate balances against society's standards. She's saying she's watching the forums (during the time she was posting) to see how people react in the community and if they fit into the paradigm. She's seeking someone who is humble yet strong willed. In other words, not bold, brazen or bawdy and with the strength to be what may be contrary to what she's observing (during the time of her posting).
She's asking if other people go with morals and wait for that one person that expresses their being within the guidelines of society or do they just "go for it" based on infatuation or maybe even "lust"?
Her explanation is that by waiting for the one she believes to be a strong person by the community's standards, she will forego the daunting task of maybe having to change a man, waiting for him to change or remain static ( as in without progress).
I could be totally wrong though,,,, | |
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| Falling in love in community or online?
Posted: 10/10/2009 10:13:59 AM |
^^^^^^^^^^ Thank you NewToMichiana for understanding and clarifying.
In reading this thread over again from 3 years ago….I could understand it may have become confusing for a few.
Gosh I dont mean to sound egotistical, I am not-…..but with the same breath, am afraid I would rather be alone then not to be challenged and anticipate growth in a relationship. No one wants to remain static.
I think the above was more incomplete and out in left field. Fractured thoughts some say…?
I believe my thoughts on the thread appeared more a result of what I had been reading in the forums. I found it difficult to comprehend that many people here developed their attraction on chemistry rather than guiding principles of what makes an ideal partner and how one views the world and the people in it. Most of the thoughts here go to what is – not the possibilities.
Great thoughts on chemistry Mackevinized …where are you? lol
I believe as we age and some of these chemicals wane for some of us and that 'chemical' reaction becomes more elusive in a relatonship.
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| Falling in love in community or online?
Posted: 10/10/2009 10:31:20 AM | I believe she's speaking of old fashioned values and seeing how a potential mate balances against society's standards. She's saying she's watching the forums (during the time she was posting) to see how people react in the community and if they fit into the paradigm. She's seeking someone who is humble yet strong willed. In other words, not bold, brazen or bawdy and with the strength to be what may be contrary to what she's observing (during the time of her posting).
She's asking if other people go with morals and wait for that one person that expresses their being within the guidelines of society or do they just "go for it" based on infatuation or maybe even "lust"?
Her explanation is that by waiting for the one she believes to be a strong person by the community's standards, she will forego the daunting task of maybe having to change a man, waiting for him to change or remain static ( as in without progress).
I could be totally wrong though,,,,
Well, NTM, since your version has been stamped with the approval of the OP, I'll try to answer it.
So the question is do people go with their morals/values and wait for the one person who expressed their being or do they go fot it based on infatuation or maybe even lust?
Trying to be really honest here, I have actually never felt lust or infatuation for someone whom I first didn't find compelling for other reasons. When I was younger, it was my idealism, my being drawn to someone I admired, and/or my feeling very loved and accepted. It's pretty much the same now, except I think I am more realistic than idealistic in what I admire in a man. I'm looking for a regular guy, not some paragon. But the feeling loved and accepted is the same. However, I don't worry or concern myself in the least about the community's standard. And I want him just as he is: hopefully most of us have reached this ripe old age realizing that trying to change our partner is a stupid idea. | |
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