| Depression and Low self-esteem
Posted: 7/1/2006 12:27:15 AM | MG, you have the right attitude. Was gonna send you an email to say "Good job" but heh, I guess at some point in my life I must have emailed someone seeking an intimate encounter! HAHA.
Anyway, keep up the good work. Bottom line is the onlyone who can really get people in a low self-esteem rut out of the hole is -- themselves. | |
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| Depression and Low self-esteem
Posted: 7/1/2006 9:57:58 AM | | each time I decide I'm going to "try" once more to get a girl, it ends with me getting suicidal because of failure. The last time I actually "scouted out" the bloor viaduct - to see if I could jump from it. I dont know if I want to know what I'll do if I "try" once more and fail | |
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| Depression and Low self-esteem
Posted: 7/1/2006 10:23:50 AM | Don't see it as failure, that's where you are going off the track.
I used to do sales for a while, a ways back. That taught me a great lesson. There were two types of salesmen, those that really devoted themselves to cold calling - and those that didn't.
The ones that didn't saw cold calling as really depressing, and avoided doing it as much as they could. They couldn't take the constant rejection.
The other type saw it as a critical foundation in sales, and took every opportunity to do it. If they went on a sales call, they cold called in the same building at the same time. When they made a sale, they still cold called, and mentioned that they had just signed a client nearby.
Guess which type did consistently better ?
Someone that doesn't know you should cause no problems to you if they reject you. You've probably rejected people too, and you certainly didn't do it for bad reasons.
Neither do they...
Probably the best advice I can give is to take a somewhat Zen approach to it all. Don't make "finding someone" the central focus of your life. Find yourself instead, and live your life in a way that focuses on doing things without regard for "getting anywhere".
Concentrate on living now, and not thinking about what you do not have.
Think about what you do have.
You can't expect anyone to love you, unless you first love yourself. If you don't ( and I am not talking about conceit here, either) you will project that feeling to those you meet - and they will not love you either.
Like I keep saying, we all have something to offer - and sometimes we are the last to realize that. | |
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Sigi
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Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 53 | |
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| Depression and Low self-esteem
Posted: 7/1/2006 11:11:44 AM | Before trying medications, you might want to try St. John's Wort - a natural product.
http://nccam.nih.gov/health/stjohnswort/
Medication will not resolve the underlying issues causing your depression, which must be dealt with. Something like St. John's Wort is safe (check out that page for the info before taking it, however) , and can help in the transition period.
There is some scientific evidence that St. John's wort is useful for treating mild to moderate depression. However, two large studies, one sponsored by NCCAM, showed that the herb was no more effective than placebo in treating major depression of moderate severity. | |
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| Depression and Low self-esteem
Posted: 7/1/2006 11:28:12 AM | | As long as you're depressed and low in self esteem you won't be very attractive to anyone people are attracted to confidence and possitive energy. So if you don't want to do anything about your problems like getting some help to deal with it, you aren't going to have much luck in the dating world. | |
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| Depression and Low self-esteem
Posted: 7/1/2006 4:27:57 PM | You've probably rejected people too
No.
I broke up with a girl... twise, each time after a number of months. but I've never rejected anyone - I've never had the chance.
As long as you're depressed and low in self esteem you won't be very attractive to anyone people are attracted to confidence and possitive energy. So if you don't want to do anything about your problems like getting some help to deal with it, you aren't going to have much luck in the dating world.
I'm more confidant now then I've ever been. | |
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| Depression and Low self-esteem
Posted: 7/1/2006 5:49:18 PM | By breaking up with them, you in fact rejected them. ( You had good reasons to do so, or else you would not have).
That doesn't count all the people you have probably rejected without being aware that you have actually done so - which is a lot more common than you might think. Your perception of who they were may have covered any chance of you seeing them as being interested in you. | |
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