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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/28/2005 10:10:22 PM | ^^^Uhuh. and it still goes on to-day. Ain't it great! It is July 29/05 to-day. Long Live AA. KCBIW  | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/29/2005 8:20:28 PM | the better i live the better my life is
the more honest i am the more good keeps coming my way
when bad comes my way....its not all that bad.
i love aa i love life and i love all of you
shy | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/29/2005 8:43:13 PM | | Good job man aa has very much changed my life as well i love the post about reading 449 llol love it... but as far as here goes if you have been going to aa then ya know god has a plan and when its right it will happen and rem its none of your business what these women think claim your side of the street and its all good take care bro!!! odaat | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/29/2005 11:31:05 PM | | Ummm whatever happened to anonymity? I think you need to go back and read the AA traditions and see where you've screwed up here. | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/29/2005 11:37:38 PM | 
i know what you mean. dont worry there are alot of us women who dont drink, and would absolutely love to find a good man who dont drink at all. | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/30/2005 7:04:26 AM | Bravo to you beachboy45! I think anyone who has the courage to speak openly about working to overcome their personal challenges, no matter what they are, should be applauded!!!!  | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/30/2005 9:07:49 AM | though i would not have a problem with someone who is `recovering', but rather see that as a sign of maturity and taking responsibility, i would be very hesitant to date someone going to A.A. in particular.
it is not a program free of controversy, and while i allow everyone their own opinions and beliefs, i do not allow them to determine mine.
there is a saying to the effect that there is `nothing worse than a reformed anything', smoker, drinker (slob in my case- now i am compulsive about organization and drive people nuts sometimes), whatever.
i have friends in A.A. who respect my desire not to be preached to and other boundaries, i have former friends who do not.
case in point- a guy in A.A. wanted to date me. i was interested, but.... since i admit to being an occasional smoker, he simply would not shut up about his wish to `reform' me. kept inviting me to do things with the tag `a whole day free from cigarettes', or similar.
now, i am not proud of smoking, and am an occasional as opposed to rabid smoker. but i have my OWN agenda and heirarchy for my self improvement. no relative stranger has any business nagging me about it.
yet- way too many times to be coincidence, those who have gone to A.A. (vs. less dogmatic recovery programs) insist on attempting to repeatedly impose their own notions of what i `should' be dealing with first in my life, and refuse to respect my boundaries about this.
it is especially whacky to my way of seeing things that at the same time, a program id's `black and white' thinking as a problem, then promotes it (A.A. is the only way, this or that is captial T truth for all people everywhere), and that says `don't SHOULD on me', but whose adherents more often than not do just that- insisting that their nag of the week is DIFFERENT, because, since it is `taught' in A.A., that particular should reflects objective reality, not someone's (informed or not) opinion.
in other words, i often find the behaviors of many A.A. adherents to be so hypocritical that i do consider it a `red flag'. before getting close to anyone in A.A. i wait and see if they allow me to be who and what i am or project a lot of shallow cliches on me as `Truth'.
wondering if the great good A.A. has done for some causes them to be overly zealous, even if well intended, when dealing with others?
peace
R | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/30/2005 10:45:18 AM | Hi Reynado:
wondering if the great good A.A. has done for some causes them to be overly zealous, even if well intended, when dealing with others?
AA is not organized and there is no control on what member say or do. Often, people new to the program are so excited that they want to share the program with everyone whether they want it or not. Our traditions say the AA is a program of attraction rather than promotion, so that kind of behaviour is not in line with the traditions.
One of the most important things I have learned in the program is that I can't change other people. My daughter smokes and I really wish she would stop, but she is an adult and makes her own choices. People make changes in their lives when they want to, not when it suits me.
AA includes all kinds of people in all stages of recovery and I think you are wise to see if they allow you to be who you are before getting close to them. | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/30/2005 10:32:26 PM | Beachboy45, there's nothing wrong with bettering yourself. We all do it. I am too, this next month coming up. I found a great man to be in my life forever. Maybe on your profile you should say that you prefer a woman who doesn't drink. Get on the dating restrictions part and check what you don't want. Keep your head up high and keep on improving yourself.
Jody | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/30/2005 10:36:29 PM | I've never had a drinking problem, because I drink very rarely or 2 times a month, but keep up the sobriety and the AA meetings. They do work. My father was in AA and had been sober for 22 years before he died 2 years ago. Keep up the good work, Beachboy45...
Jody | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/30/2005 10:40:12 PM | I had friends who went to AA and had been sober for years. They didn't preach to me or anything and we went out together to bars to play pool or watch a band play. And they never, ever picked up the bottle. But I knew other AA members who were preaching at me and telling where not to go and things like that. And I'm like you, Reynado, I don't like people to determine my opinions.
Jody | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 7/31/2005 11:29:27 PM | @blastkist
It is o.k. for a person to break their own anonymity...it is not o.k. for someone else to break it for them.
and as far as the traditions go.....
Eleven. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films.
Tradition eleven is talking about "Our Public Relations Policy" not individual anonymity.
So..nobody screwed up.
Just couldn't stay out of it.... | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 8/1/2005 10:50:05 AM | | @ blastkist: Anyonymity? Tradition 11: Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion: we need always to maintain PERSONAL ANONYMITY at the level of press, radio and films. Tradition 12 talks about placing principles before personalities. And the A.A. preamble states that our primary purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics achieve sobriety. So, its my choice to when, where, and with whom I break my anonymity. If theres a sick and suffering practicing alcoholic that hasnt been exposed to A.A., do I not break my anonymity? Its my responsibility to let him know who I am, and that I can help if he wants it. So... dont think any of us here thats made the choice to come forward has "screwed up." I have the right to break my anonymity, but dont have the right to break the anonymity of others. And with that, I'll K.C.B............. GARY | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 8/1/2005 1:55:52 PM | | I'm with you man! Most people want you to lie to them... It's too bad! Good luck!! | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 8/11/2005 4:00:34 PM | | Hey guys thanks for backing me up on tradition 11 It was my choice to to speak my mind on the issue just like it was my choice to quit drinking Hurricane Dennis fried another computer so ive been off for about a month but still sober and now it seems im single again so ill be changing my profile again I tried to date a (social drinker) and almost slipped but if nothing else it was a learning experience that will last a lifetime I guess she was a character defect LOL Anyway thanks everyone for being there for me its like you are my meeting in between meetings God Bless Charlie | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 8/11/2005 4:10:34 PM | Gee it's August 11th and we are still here. Ain't it GREAT! *Big Grins here. In got my 2 year pin last night....
If I want to break my anonymity it is my own business. So I am!! So There!! You Go Boy!~
Oh boy on the dating thing.....yes have to watch that others do not mess up our Program at all times. I'd say your HP was looking out for you BeachBoy. LOL!
**Joke** Look out ahead**
A character defect is watching the neighbour's wife sunbathing Nude!
A short-coming would be climbing the fence! 
Glad your back Sweetie, KCBIW.
Now post on my AA thread too. heheheheeeeeeeee | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 8/12/2005 9:47:52 AM | don't attack me now........ but why is it if you have been sober for over a yr , that you need to go to meetings 3 times a week???????
just asking/curious
seems to be alot of meetings. | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 8/12/2005 11:42:42 AM | no question in aa is stupid. we got drunk every day didnt we? when i dont go often i feel it. meeting makers make it. just ask anyone who relapsed.
i am going to a sleepover this weekend. to a ladys house i was living with at a half-way house. we agreed that time seemed to go too fast when we got together for just a few hours. her 2 sons are also in the program and we are like one happy family when together. the meetings i go to with them are awsome. so we will try to hit as many as possible even if its a few a day.
hi ruby........hope you have a good weekend.
saw my brothr the other day and boy does he look good since he picked himself up and got back into the program.
love shy | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 8/17/2005 3:48:28 PM | If you have been sober for a fairly long period I would wait for a little while to share that with her. It will be easier for her to accept if she already has developed an appreciation of your other fine qualities.
You have to realize that many alcoholic men beat the crap out of thier girlfriends. | |
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| Say AA and watch them run
Posted: 8/18/2005 12:20:01 PM | | I dont NEED to go to 3 meetings a week I WANT to go i dont always get to go to 3 a week but if i can i do It reminds me of where i was and where i am now I used to go to bars every night but now a simple meeting is my new bar minus the beer and pool table My girlfriend still drinks so i see what it was like for me all the time Im coming up on 2 years sober so i dont know it all but ive hung out long enough to know this is the best thing for me Its not for everyone but it works for me one day at a time | |
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