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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 10:33:41 AM | [Quote]
Amen, itsmeinco, sounds like some real bitter apples in this thread | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 11:01:01 AM | mail order bride?
wow, that must be one big envalope  | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 11:03:49 AM | To all the posts on this topic but most especially to Mr.GordonGecko and the other gentleman with the lengthly post...all I can say is "wow".
Interesting concepts and legal jargon to back up your opinion, this in itself is refreshing. But from a personal perspective, being a women who was deemed "not submissive enough" by a man that I was deeply in love with (I treated him with love, honor, respect and simple adoration)...the idea of "mail order brides" or more simply put "internet wives" - it's still a harsh concept and a sad reality. The man I refer to is educated, intelligent, successful, good looking but most of all...he's jaded. Being hurt in the past by a couple of "Western" women has caused him to seek his future elsewhere and guess what? He found her online, while we were still dating - in fact, he found her just at the time when I knew unequivacably that I'd fallen for him. The big difference is that he met her online, while on business in China and that when she finally does get her "papers" they will be married. She's many years younger, submissive, petite and barely speaks English - but as he often told me "if American men had any idea what they could have in other countries, they wouldn't bother with women here period".
Did it hurt? Very much so, but I've come to realize that everyone does what they need to do. For him, a strong, intelligent, successful, halfway decent looking, "Western" woman was not what he needed and frankly, without sounding jaded here myself, it's not what he needed nor could he handle in the end. I still love him, but I wish him the best in the future bottom line. Not all American women are male-bashing, men haters...
Thanks for your insights, it proved to be interesting reading today. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 11:24:28 AM | | P.S. It does "just so happen" that the girl he "choose" was from a tiny village where the norm is poverty by American standards and that his perfectly adequate income of $75K (or so) is as close to Bill Gates income as she'd ever see from her country. But in the end, if he loves her and she loves him - I hope they'll be happy. And for the record, I have NEVER asked a man how much he makes EVER, nor have I made any of the gross generalizations about men, as I've seen expressed on this site (and I've only been on it two days). This goes for men and women both...isn't it time we cut each other some slack and just accepted that we are all looking for love, whatever form it takes? Thanks for listening! | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 12:06:00 PM | American women have watched too many hollywood love stories, and American men have watched too much porn. It really is a recipe for disaster.
I would have to say though that the types of people likely to enter into a marriage like this will likely have it work. I mean a guy doing this is almost certainly someone with low social skills, or some other habit that keeps him from getting American girls, but who really wants to be married in a happy relationship. A girl doing this is almost certainly in a horrible situation where she thinks anywhere would be better than her country. Chances are then that when she gets to America it will seem like a great step up, and even if the guy isn't perfect she would be likely to be happier and therefore in no rush to get divorced... | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 1:43:40 PM | | EEEK!! I apologize Vermillion....a vermillion times. I didn't see where those were not your original words. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 3:25:39 PM | 23....its a differant story when your older my friend.......lol...but damn fun findin out...lol | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 3:28:16 PM | | so many that denigrate the 'mail-order' bridal business, but subscribe to (through participation) in the internet dating thing... not much difference. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 4:07:19 PM | An earlier poster writes;
My hairdresser was a mail order bride from Russia.
She was very unhappy in her marriage and left him very shortly after coming to Canada. She tells me that a lot of Russian mail order brides she knows are also unhappy in their marriage but feel trapped and helpless.
BINGO!!! | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 4:45:19 PM | ^^ A girl I worked with knew a man who had a Russian mail order type bride. She was very unhappy as well.
I wonder how many of these women have jobs outside the home? I also wonder how many send money home to thier families? So many men have posted that they are sick of women going after them for thier money......I have to say it seems that the mail order brides are after the money too. Less money goes further with them because they usually come from nothing.
They say they don't like it when they see someone describing themselves as an independant woman.....then they say they feel used for money. So it would seem logical they would like a financially independant woman.
Or maybe it's the independant thinker they are trying to avoid? | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 5:13:40 PM | I've read through every post here, may i make a few observations.
[ Asian women are more "submissive"]....TOTAL FANTASY.. these women have survived on average, impossible living conditions. they can eat the average wimpy american males LUNCH!!!
No where in this discussion of "mail order brides" (a term already too disparaging to take seriously.) is a clear depiction of the legal hassles involved(except the Australian poster).
In order to marry a filipino, for instance, you have to pay for blood testing, counseling and legal prep for your fiancee. For some insane reason, this MUST be done in Manila, so if your dusky beauty is 2,4oo miles away in southern Mindanao, you'll have to pay for her trip and stay.
After you enter HER country, you are required to marry her THERE, with all legalities binding, when you return to the states and apply for a visa, you will be told there is a strong recommendation you hire an attorney to file the application($1,500) just to reduce chance of errors which puts you at the back of the line. then you will be told there is a two and half to seven year wait for applications to be approved..........If you continue, show three years tax return at a minimum of 125% above poverty level, you will then be told there is no guarantee you foreign lass will be approved.
If you are REALLY STOOPID, you bring her here on a tourist visa, which automatically breaks about five federal laws....laws with real sharp teeth due to the Patriot Act. Laws which cancel the right to petition for citizenship if a person is brought over for marriage on a tourist visa,with criminal charges...... THESE folks.... are NOT playing......... | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 5:15:36 PM | Sorry. To me, it's barely a step up from slavery.
======================================
Slavery Spelly??? Slavery??
. Now how does that go again?
I believe it goes something to the tune of trreating people like nothing more than animals.
Well you know all about that don't you. Girlfriends and womens rags continally describing men as "dogs" and advising on another to treat them as such.
Try doing this.
Get hold of any mainstream womens rag and get hold of a page containing relationship advice or discussions about men. Every time the word man pops up change it to ni66er.
Then re read the article back.
Out loud.
To friends. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 5:26:46 PM | | One more postscript on foreign brides. If your exotic lass has ANY problem with ICE(formerly INS )and is put in detention, if it is a country we don't deport to, (and there are many) she will languish IN JAIL....indefinitely. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 7:30:26 PM | | Sim i personally think paying upfront is so much better than being belittled and paying at the end | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/4/2006 9:14:57 PM | I work with the ASUDT ( anti-scam undercover investigation team ) as an investigator of women from the FSU on dating sites. Your friend is lucky. In the FSU an American man's chances of encountering a money scammer is 85 percent. Almost all of the sites are operated by the Russian Mafia or other organized crime groups that also have ties with many American dating sites like M.C., Web D , A.F.F. Y.P. if you can decifer my abreviations. In addition to this even if you successfully meet a woman from the FSU and marry her there is the 90 percent likelihood that after she gets her permanent green card she'll tell you bye bye. They are looking for a host to get here. I have received letters from men that have lost as much as $20,000 believing the lies of love. It is a huge problem and my suggestion to our Government would be to ban all internet communication of FSU foreign dating sites in America. The FBI and the IFCC are both well aware of this problem and they are working on unfortunately in vain.
If you would like to see these women scammers go to this link http://russiantearoom.net/index2.php
It contains merely a fraction of them and it will help you to better understand just why men may be persuaded to send money to these women professing to love them. You may feel they are very stupid for falling into this trap however when you are lonely and have been a lone and want and need someone in your life you'll be more suseptible to this. Some of these scammers are very patient only striking after many months of coorespondence with as many as a 500 guys at the same time while you're thinking your the only one. It's a full-time job for them and they make a lot of money doing this fradulent activity. One American dollar in Russia is worth approximately 28 times more there. So the guy that sends a $1,000.00 to one of these girls for example is really padding her for a while. If you're thinking you'll get your money back by the reporting it to the authorities in their country you're dreaming because most of the authorities are just as crooked as they are. It's a dating game you don't want to become involved with and there is a 90 percent chance you going to lose every time if you do. | |
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| Mail order brides / grooms
Posted: 7/4/2006 9:27:49 PM | ok ok we will order from the States {since I am in Canada}
and the States can order from Canada
there ... mail order away... | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/5/2006 2:31:39 AM |
i know of 2 guys who are in mail order bride marriages. and they have been successful. but myself, theres no excitment there. no thrill of the chase to catch her heart.
I know what you mean. Where's the thrill of the chase? Or the uncertainty which develops or blossoms into something that words can only dream of capturing? The romance, the yearning?? I guess these guys just decided it mail it in (<-intended ) | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/5/2006 3:11:31 AM | | ^ Get her to send herself COD. What are they gonna do when you don't pay and she bursts out of the package on this end? They won't send her back...at least not right away. By then you'll be sick of her anyway. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/5/2006 3:54:19 AM | | No, if you don't pay, they'll just keep her in the crate down at the dock until you do. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/5/2006 7:17:16 PM |
It is really more and more difficult anywhere nowadays to find a woman who will be submissive, take care of the household, children and not have career ambitions.
I think that's a good thing. It shows that women want to use their brains. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/6/2006 8:25:55 AM | Well, Gordon, what an awful lot of rage, hate, and bitterness you have. I am shocked. I would wonder though, what you are doing on this site as opposed to a situation/site better suited to your needs?
Also, your logic, or lack thereof, escapes me. "If American men stop marrying American women, the birth rate goes down." What nonsense!! These men bring their brides HERE, and have their families IN AMERICA. How does the birth rate go down? Unless, of course, the now defunct idea of marriage to an American woman was the ONLY means by which the American population grew. I didn't know that all other women on earth were barren, or is that these men marry foreign women AND leave the U.S. altogether?
Finally, your insults to American women are nothing new, it is your blatant and unwarranted attack on American culture, media, government, political views, social movements, etc. that I find disgraceful.
So here's a sloution for you; go to whatever country you feel you might find the best "kennel" in which your ideal wife is waiting, marry her immediately, and STAY THERE in the Utopian system that raised her, the perfect woman, devoid of all the terrors American women are so riddled with and for heaven's sakes NEVER expose her to the ugliness that is America; either its culture or its people. | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/6/2006 8:40:04 AM | | Mail order marriages have a better success rate than tradional North American marriages. Much of it has to do with the culture of the women where they find it embarrassing to let themselves go. Men are more inclined to romance a fit wife, a romanced women is a happy women, thus as the saying goes "Happy wife happy life". | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/6/2006 8:55:04 AM |
Birth rate is down in the US already. This decline in birth rates is found in many other modernized countries, Germany for example. And you think this has nothing to do with a divorce rate that hovers somewhere between 50-70 percent in the US? Divorced men who are saddled down with alimony and child support are not having more children, they can't afford them or they are too embittered with the government regulating their love life, moreso their sons will see the literal wage slavery their fathers endure to avoid imprisonment for failure to pay child support and will likely think very hard about whether they want to be married and have children. Furthermore more young men are growing up in households without fathers, what do you think that will do that young mans view of values about marriage and having children? Marriage as an institution in the US is in grave peril and you think this has nothing to do with the declining birth rate?
Statistics and research predicts that there will be an increase in unmarried childless women reaching age 30 and beyond in the next few decades. Current stats show more and more young healthy career men are avoiding marriage altogether. (The pool of future fathers that might be the most desirable for women) Many financial analysts, accountants and advisors are suggesting that young men do not get married in modern times ( there is just too much liability involved) and if they do they should understand that prenuptial agreements are just pieces of paper in many cases and they should create pre marriage shelters for their assets. Do you understand what that means? Analysts are saying that IF YOU GET MARRIED, YOU BETTER PREPARE FOR DIVORCE RIGHT NOW INSTEAD OF HOPING IT WON'T HAPPEN. Do you know what kind of message that sends to American men? Would you take a cruise on a ship that has a 70 percent chance of sinking and if you want a spot in one of the few lifeboats, it could cost you 40-70 percent of your assets for the rest of your life?
The situation with men not wanting to get married or have children is documented, its called 'The Marriage Strike' Look it up, Google it, its out there.
Heres what I find funny. All the women in here who say any foreign woman that an American man finds, either through travel or some dating service must mean without a doubt that the man is a loser and the women is some docile greencard lusting little BFM. Talk about overgeneralization and stereotyping. So why do these women care? If those men are losers like some say they are, why do they care if men they don't want anyway dont want them? Ah...logic there. I know that concept could cause some heads to smoke here, but the logic is undeniable.
Why do some of you care that men you don't even want anyway don't want you? Why begrude them the pursuit of their own happiness in whatever legal means they can in this short life? You talk about 'rage, hate and bitterness', what do you call women who piss on men who simply decide American women are not for them and just want to pursue foreign women? | |
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| Mail order brides
Posted: 7/6/2006 11:53:05 AM | You did not respond to anything in my posting with any more logic than your original posting, which is what I expected. I never called the men who marry these women losers, I merely suggested you join them AND REMAIN in the country of your choice,as you have such disdain for this one.
The thing I took exception to was your "rage, hate, and bitterness" TOWARDS AMERICAN CULTURE AND SOCIETY, not the men who choose to marry women of ANY nationality. And, if American society is so degraded, American women such monsters, rejoice in the fact that they will be raising LESS of these horrible creatures further polluting this sinking society you so despise.
Still baffled as to why, if you feel this way, you are on this site? I wouldn't worry about the birth rate, either...its OVERPOPULATION that is the problem. Google that. | |
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