| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 12/9/2006 12:53:25 PM | | the demonization of women in bars is retarded. I think of myself and all my friends as great people, we all go to bars. Everyone does, it's not a goddamn lifestyle, it's just a place to hang. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 12/9/2006 5:58:13 PM | >We all go to bars. Everyone does,
I don't think sooo. I wont step foot into one
I only go to bars to catch live music. I'd just as soon go to a coffee house and listen to the same music. I'm not there to date, for a quickie, nor to party. | |
|
| |
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 12/10/2006 8:38:58 AM |
I only go to bars to catch live music. I'd just as soon go to a coffee house and listen to the same music. I'm not there to date, for a quickie, nor to party.
fine, the point im' trying to make is that people that go to bars aren't necessarily bad or sub-standard people, as some in here make them out to be. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 12/12/2006 3:09:09 AM | | you don't have to agree with me, but I can say I have got some of what I said out of women's mouths. Like when they go out together they all feel the need to protect each other even when it is not neccessary. Moreover, if you really want to approach a group you might want to invest in a "wingman" but they are hard to find because alot of dudes act like females. and what I men is that if a girl is not into them they act like "b&*^*es" because "no one wants to talk to them". then they end up C$%#-blocking you. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 12/12/2006 3:21:52 AM | THEY SAY they are only there to dance and be with their girlfriends BUT NO WAY !!! They just say that to guys they don't want. The fact is they are trolling most of the time. You don't want a woman from a bar anyway. Stats show they are very violent personalities who drink and freakwent (wink) them, and you have almost a 100% of a chance of being hurt.
If you want a good pick up line say this:
2) Is it hot in here or is it just you?
3) You're so sweet you're giving me a toothache.
4) I've seem to have lost my number, can I have yours? | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 12/12/2006 4:02:26 AM |
THEY SAY they are only there to dance and be with their girlfriends BUT NO WAY !!! They just say that to guys they don't want. The fact is they are trolling most of the time. You don't want a woman from a bar anyway. Stats show they are very violent personalities who drink and freakwent (wink) them, and you have almost a 100% of a chance of being hurt.
Actually, I occassionally go to bars and clubs with a few good girlfriends. One of them is married. We even do chick trips to the islands a few times a year. And not once has one of us "picked up" a man. We do talk to them, as well as to other women. We prefer the men who have the funniest pick-up lines....who aren't too serious. The best one yet was:
"Hi, I'm Jack, are you the ladies I'm supposed to meet from foursome.com?" | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 3/4/2007 1:03:32 PM | In my opinion, more often than not, women in bars always seem to have a 'man hater' attitude even when you approach them in the nicest way. It's even worse when they are in a group of their friends...therefore my days of trying the bar approach are over, I'd rather spend my hard earned money buying a total stranger a drink than try to charm my way into a womans world. I'm perfectly ok watching them dance and keeping my distance than have my ego bruised. But occasionally I will spot one who catches my eye and a simple wink or smile is enough. I don't have to try to force my way into their girls night out. C'mon guys, give the ladies space, no one wants to meet you in a bar. Now let's all drink to that! | |
|
| |
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 3/27/2007 4:42:58 PM | | who cares your out to the bars having a good time where or not you pick up a girl. go have fun be out going and take your chance here and there. not for nothing if your shy or have low self-confindence.... oh shes too hot for me.... kind of attitude. your gonna get shot down... while your at the bar and the girl that your checkin out goes up... dont be afraid to smile and say hi, hows your night going?... be bold never hurt anyone. so lift up your chest and just go ahead and do it. just grow the balls and get your confidence. and most important always look like your having the time of your life. nobody wants to talk to someone who looks glum. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/17/2007 2:33:33 PM | | If a guy bought me a drink, I'd accept it, it's rude not to accept a gift, but, most guys, are looking for booty, and don't think you're even worth tha few$ to buy a drink. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/17/2007 2:40:54 PM | | i've personally never hooked up at a bar or club, I go to have a good time with my friends and get polluted, people who try to pick me up don't get anywhere because it's not personal enough and usually pretty obvious that all they want is to get laid. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/17/2007 3:08:35 PM | | My girlfriends and I go out quite often, maybe not with the intention of meeting someone, but if it happens - who knows...... I do not usually let a man I do not know buy me a drink. If we are at a place that has dancing I will almost always say yes to a dance if the guy has the courage to approach me, unless he smells or is very drunk. Every woman in my group of friends feels differently about the "accepting drinks" - but I cannot think of a time that any of us are offended by it. Note to men: If you ask me to dance and I say yes, that does not mean I want to continue to dance every dance with you, do not turn a fast dance into a slow dance, do not try to kiss me or touch me in an inappropriate way, never, ever try that thing some guys do, I don't know what to call it but it is a total turn off and embarrassing, it is when a guy tries to put his leg/knee between your legs, in the unlikely event that a woman wants to hump your leg, she will let you know. Do not invite yourself to sit down, do not buy all my friends drinks and then invite yourself to our table. If I like you, I will let you know. If I want you to sit with us I will ask you to, at that time or while dancing you may ask if you can buy me a drink. Do not ask me for my number, if you are interested in me write your name and number on a small piece of paper and hand it to me. This way you don't have to face rejection and I don't have to feel like a **** just because I may not be interested in dating you. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/17/2007 6:14:11 PM |
If a guy bought me a drink, I'd accept it, it's rude not to accept a gift, but, most guys, are looking for booty, and don't think you're even worth tha few$ to buy a drink.
Every guy is looking for booty.
Some of them are looking for something IN ADDITION to booty.
Michael | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/17/2007 6:39:24 PM | | Who gets all fancied up and goes to a bar without hoping to connect with someone? We don't get all pretty to impress our friends for a girl's night out. A gaggle of girlfriends at the bar with her or not, if you're interested in her by sight alone, suck it up, walk over to her and strike up a conversation. Don't need to buy her a drink from the get go, the confidence (as long as it's not arrogant and rude) will be enticing enough in itself. Many women DO feel that men are trolling for someone to take home, so that's the annoyance they may project, particularly when a guy is scoping out her chest, butt and legs while she's trying to talk in return. If she's being polite, and distant ... SHE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU (works in reverese too). Good luck! Happy fishing. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/17/2007 7:54:05 PM | | Its the whole wrong strategy to approach women in bars. I just go to play pool and if a nice lady comes up to play, or talk, or whatever, I just talk like a new friend. Women are really in control, if we men know it or not. So just relax and go with the flow... | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/18/2007 1:13:44 AM |
I just talk like a new friend. 
... as it is always too hot inside (unless in sunny tropical open "drafty" bar) and pink cheeks send message across anyway  | |
|
| |
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/18/2007 2:07:04 AM | I think this totally depends on the type of bar/club/lounge that you go too....Usually when I do not go to the local bars of where I live, I can get a pretty good vibe about the place and what the atmosphere is like....You can also tell quite a bit by the way a girl dresses when she goes to the bar....
The is a fine line between dressing sexy/slutty, and classy....Depending on what type of guy you are, I think finding a style you like is a good way to start your hunting at the bar...LoL
Just putting in my two cents....
KRS | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/18/2007 3:16:56 AM | Do you gals let a guy buy you drink all night while you have obsolutely no interested in him.
Good grief. You surely can't seriously be asking that question!
What planet did you come from man? Where have you been living all this time?
While not all are like that, there are MANY gold digging whores out there.
Women who will lead guys on in order to get free drinks @ the bar/club. Women who go after the guy driving the Mercedes or Porsche outside. The guy in the $2000 Armani/Versace suit with the fat wallet.
It not just their fault though. Many man let this happen and it's their own fault.
Just the other day there was an episode on Dr. Phil and it was about women like this. Women that meet men from sites like sugardaddies, women that are only after men for the material/monerary things they have and can provide to them. You should have seen this idiot on there. Even his best friend tried to warn him about the girl he met off that site. Deep down he knew his friend was right because on the stage while his friend belittled her the jacka$$ just sat there quietly and said nothing in her defence. Phil even asked him why he wasn't sticking up for her if he really felt his good friend was wrong. The jacka$$ bought her a Mercedes as a present, etc. etc.
She was only really with him because of his financial status.
While money grubbing women are to blame for that foolish mentality of theirs, so are the men that let them get away with it. Afterall, survival of the fittest.
They're just following the ol' rainbow to the end looking for that pot of gold. Looking to find a guy that can provide for them and their future.
(not saying that's right...everyone should pull their own weight in a relationship)
Oh as for:
You wrote:
>> Do you think many women actually want to be approached by a man in a bar or club?>>
Personally, I don't really like guys approaching because, though I'm very outgoing, I'm shy when it comes to that.
Instead, the best way I know is for the guy to send over a drink. If the woman is interested, she will come and thank you. If she's not interested, she'll most likely just nod or wave her thanks. That means less of an investment for the guy too. That few bucks is probably much better than being shot down and embarrassed.
Sharzi
Well first of all, you're kind of contradicting yourself are you not.
You can't be THAT outgoing if you have a problem with a guy approaching you to talk to you. If you're THAT shy then I'm sure you usually don't approach them, now do you?
Therefore, that being the case, NOBODY will approach anybody!
You won't approach them because you're too shy and you don't expect them to approach you either.
How will you ever get to meet new people that way?
Life is too short to live in a shell, feeling all shy. Shyness will get you NOWHERE!
Trust me on that one. I used to be REALLY shy when I was younger. I still am to some degree but nothing like I once was. Seriously, shyness will get you nowhere.
Someone told me that awhile back and it's soo true.
Think about past experiences you've had where you've seen someone you were attracted too but were too shy to talk to them. I'm sure we've all had those. Who knows what you may have lost out on.
When you're shy it shows as well.
Your discomfort shows/reflects on you and sometimes drives people away from approaching you, even though they truly may have wanted to, and they may have been people you would have liked to have approach you.
Just my.02 cents...take it for what's it's worth.
 | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/18/2007 5:50:47 AM | All this contradictory feedback leaves me exactly where I started on this subject: confused. The only real answer is that some are receptive, some are not. Unfortunatly, to get to the receptive ones you have to get shot down sometimes, and I take rejection very personnally. I mean, for a complete stranger to just to be like "omg... like go away already", my confidence is usually dashed enough to not be able to approach anyone else.
So I prefer to mind my own business and see if any women are interested enough to make the first move. And of course the only women who tend to be unattractive. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/18/2007 6:15:44 AM | After my girlfriend of three years broke up with me I decided to get back in the swim and went to some "singles dances". These are easier, becuase you know everyone is there to meet someone.
I can't say that I met anyone that way. However, at the first one, I set out an agenda to talk to 15 women, to dance with at least two, and two smile and talk to anyone. After the first hour I had worn off my shyness and could approach any woman with a smile. If she ignored the smile, I'd say excuse me. If that provoked a snarl, I'd say "Do you know where the washrooms are?"
As for lines. I stuck to "Hi, I'm Ketch"
It never hurts to smile, be friendly, and set goals.
Ketch | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/18/2007 10:05:26 AM | All I can say is that a woman doesn't have to go to a bar to be picked up, we pretty much get hit on anytime we leave the house, so yes some women do go there strictly to hang out with friends, dance, have a drink or two and some laughs. Mostly the men are a backdrop. If a man happens to be there that they are into, they will of course switch gears and consider him, but he's not considered the actual event as much as just the atmosphere around it.
Men don't get approached constantly in life so they seem to go out more so to actually meet women as the event. To them the women are more the focus and the music, drinks and their buddies are part of the atmosphere.
So basically what you have in the end is a lot of men out scoping for women and a lot of women basically going on about their business and not paying it much mind. | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/19/2007 2:01:53 PM | One of the most fun weekends I ever had was to approach a group of ladies in Portland Or. They turned out to be lady COPS! All with the rank of Lt and up. So, we partied until I had to fly back to Chicago and they went back to well, a big city...
So, never waste an opportunity to turn someone into a friend. Single or group, I think the whole thing is about attitude. You can only work on yours, but if they sense that you are not a perve, player, whatever they don't like, most will warm up to you. Remember, women want to be entertained. So, get in the mood and be entertaining and you will be in. The most successful pickup artist I have ever known is a guy that sings, plays guitar, and will do almost anything to entertain them. Cheesy? How about if you introduce your buddy as a movie star. Everyone knows that he is not, but a little play acting is just fun. Carry it on for the fun it is and don't be so serious about all this meeting and DON'T focus on sex. Remember, every woman gives it up under the right circumstance. We all want what is hard to get, so be a little hard to get... | |
|
| Approaching women in bars
Posted: 4/19/2007 5:44:21 PM | I go to bars less now just because its hard for me to find a babysitter.
But I do enjoy it. I agree with who said about the buying a drink. A great way to get me in your favor for at least a few mintues is to ask me "can I get you a drink?" or "What are you drinking?". But a chat does not mean you get that night in bed ya know? It means if I truly think that I'm interested in seeing you again, we'll talk about it. Let me say "what are you doing next week?" before you make any guesses.
This works well also for those who are nervous about "is it the right thing to do?". Hey if youre polite, the worst you'll get is a "no". Next! | |
|
Home
login 
