| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/8/2006 9:50:26 PM | I find it interesting that the more attractive girls on these forums
seem to be ok with pretty high numbers
leads me to believe this
-attrative=lots of offers=lots of partners=lots of need to accept a high number
hmmmmmmmmmmmm | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/8/2006 10:29:01 PM | ~OT~Goodness. I may have missed something ~ but I don't see these attractive ladies posting their numbers here. Maybe they are just smart enough to know it's NEVER appropriate to be judgmental. There's a concept lacking in this forum ~ the ability to see a person for who they are, not who they once were.
And for the previous poster who declares AIDS can lay dormant for up to 6 years. Please do your research ~ AIDS can lay dormant for infinity. It's HIV that may be non-detected and or dormant. AIDS can remain dormant forever with appropriate medications (AIDS does NOT exist without HIV. Magic Johnson is a very good example.) If you want to spread your fear of disease, please at least quote reputable information.
I have to wonder how many people here have NO clue about testing. Testing is NOT a one time thing. If you are sexually active, but safe at all times ~ every 6 months is the standard. If you are in a relationship and not protected, every 6 months for both parties. I have been celibate for two years and still get tested each year. Prior to a sexual relationship I will get tested and I will require the same. Safe sex for 6 months and then to be discussed after that. Common sense not fear is the key. | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/9/2006 9:11:33 AM | The thing is, you can't count on everybody to be truthful re: how "safe" they've been time after time after time. Sure you can pick something up your first an only time, but for whoever said increased numbers doesn't equal increased odds, sorry, but you're wrong. The odds are not the same every time (this isn't craps), the odds change with each person and his or her past behaviour and the behaviours of his or her partners.
I don't care how well you *claim* to know somebody, either. Look at how many people have no clue they've been cheated on after years of marriage (couples are supposed to know each other pretty well). So, you don't "know" people. You can be fooled as easily as somebody's husband or wife. If you think you do, you're being careless. In fact, I'd argue that the more people you've been with, the less time you've had to spend getting to "know" them (that's not to say somebody who's slept with one person even knows that person at all, mind you).
I also have to question the argument that people who have more sex are better educated and more careful about it. That's like saying people who drive all the time are more careful drivers and that they don't develop sloppy driving habits like talking on the cell while driving, rolling stops, etc... Good practice can make you good at something, but lots of practice says nothing about safety.
Condoms... condoms "reduce" the risk, so kudos to people who wear them and make their partners wear them, but they're not 100%.
What I think I see in this thread is people who don't get laid very much, and think that people who do get laid lots are whores, and people who get laid lots and want to think they're in control of the risks they're taking. It's like my mom always says when I go on a trip - it's not my driving she's concerned about, it's the other @$$holes on the road. Most people behind the wheel of a car have valid driver's licences, so they should all be "safe," correct? Nevertheless, there are lots of accidents, especially on high-volume roads. | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/9/2006 9:31:18 AM | Hmmm good question, I guess in part it would depend on age.
Lets say I met a women and she was 30. Well if she said she has had 10 different lovers over the years thats not bad but if she told me more the 8 in the last year I think I would walk, I think its a sign that she can not be content with one man, and she loses interest in them quickly. and I would say the same for the men. I know we are all sexual creatures, and the basic instinct to get busy is in all of us, but you have to draw a line somewhere.. | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/9/2006 9:49:41 AM | Greg: As usual, nice insight!!! 
Hmmm good question, I guess in part it would depend on age.
Lets say I met a women and she was 30. Well if she said she has had 10 different lovers over the years thats not bad but if she told me more the 8 in the last year I think I would walk, I think its a sign that she can not be content with one man, and she loses interest in them quickly. and I would say the same for the men. I know we are all sexual creatures, and the basic instinct to get busy is in all of us, but you have to draw a line somewhere..
Interesting. This is exactly why I will NOT justify those types of questions with an answer. First, I do not discuss the lives of others, so telling would infringe upon the privacy of others. Second, those I loved in my past hold a very treasured place in my life. It is difficult for others to understand that those people will forever be a part of me and my life. All that needs to be known is that I've been with others, I believe in testing, I believe in safe sex and I do not indulge in frivolous encounters. For me, it's simple: no love, no sex. If he and I are to the point of discussing sex, he probably already knows me well enough to make a decision based upon who I am today, not who I was 20 years ago. The problem I see, people base entirely too much on sex and don't take time to know the other person. What a shame, so many wonderful people being judge by those who probably don't have a stellar past, but choose to judge based upon personal bias. I guess the upside, that leaves more quality people for those of us who prefer not to judge. | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/9/2006 9:56:40 AM | Who gives a rats turd?
I would just like to be the now and hopefully the last.
What's bad is when they ask for numbers,then want names to go with them.
Now I have to rememberr her name? | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/9/2006 11:26:07 AM |
well its ok that you diagree verygreen, but personally if I know my partner has been around the block a dozen times in the last year then I preffer to not to be the bakers dozen.
And if you say well maybe she was in love each time, then I would say to you have another hit on that bong, cuz she has no conecpt of what love is.. | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/9/2006 3:08:04 PM | Seems to me many people tend to be hypocrites in matters such as these...
With most guys if a woman has been around she is labeled a tramp but to most men a man who racks them up often enough is every other guys hero...
What is past is past what only counts is right here and now...
For myself anyway that is my road to happiness...
Have a nice day  | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/9/2006 3:15:23 PM | It's everybody's right to ask that question if they want. If the person being asked doesn't like the question, he/she can refuse to answer, and the person asking can accept that or not. Furthermore, if the person asking gets an answer he/she doesn't like, he/she can also accept that or walk. I think it's a valid question - hell, people have lots more hangups than that. I personally like to know how many cats a woman has owned before I date her. It's an indicator of sanity, so... whatever... openness and honesty to the max. Come what may  | |
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allh2h
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Joined: 3/23/2006
Msg: 64 | |
| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/9/2006 7:06:59 PM |
I quit asking that years ago I go with how I feel about her. I don't keep track of my number ,its not a numbers game. I don't ask or expect her to give me a number
I like this theory.... | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 7/12/2006 9:55:23 AM | wow.... never really gave that much thought, until now. I dont think that it should really matter, cause they sure as hell were'nt no virgin when you got with them. Does it really matter How much experiance they've had? No.....I would'nt judge anyone on the number of people they have slept with. Everyone has a past.  Some more incriminating than others, so if you cant seem to except that when coming into the relationship, then just accept this........... You have issues in yourself that you must deal with, like probably just being mad  that you cant top their number. | |
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Mayor
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Joined: 1/2/2006
Msg: 67 | |
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jg65
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Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 68 | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 9/9/2007 5:28:23 PM | well from what I can gather, most people think STD's are related to number of partners. If a girl/guy is with a only 1 0r 2 partners and one of them happens to have something and gives it to the other one, guess what. You ask your partner how many, they say 2, you feel comfortable and bam then you have something. Be honest about the number question, It comes up because you want to know if that person has been around, for a guy he doesn;t want to know that his girl has slept with every guy she ran into. They want to feel they got something that everyone else didn't get.
I always find it funny about a topic like this, everyone on this site must be the 50% of the people that don't have anything. Reports are that 50% of the public has herpes. No telling about other things. I guess these boards are full of the non infected 50%. | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 9/9/2007 5:45:19 PM | | I came of age in the 70's. Our attitudes, as young adults, were different from any age in our society...this was pre-AIDS...Herpes what?,/ We had just been liberated by the sexual revolution of the 60's and were the first generation to go forth and simply be our sexual selves...both men and women. I grew up living in Fort Lauderdale at the time...take the rowdiness of Pensacola, Daytona, Lake Haversu, and New Orleans spring breaks...and you had Ft. Lauderdale of the 70's and early 80's. It wasn't just men...women were sexually free to experience their own newfound freedom where there was no label of "slut", "tramp", or "whore". People simply did it...without fear of disease or pregnancy. I am one of the lucky ones, though. I settled down with one girl in 1985 and calmed down. I am happy to be disease free (I still get tested on AIDS day and I am still negative) I have had very few partners in the last 7 years. I had quantity in my youth..the number is shocking...but now I prefer quality of quantity. Today, I probably would be scared to death of the whole scene, and just remain celibate. | |
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Ddc758
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Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 71 | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 9/9/2007 6:12:02 PM | | I don't think high numbers really means more experienced. Some people have had many 'inexperienced' partners, which doesn't truly make them great in bed. Others may have only had a few 'experienced' partners and they are great lovers. Either way, protection is the key. Whether you've been with two people or twenty, ensuring the other person is safe and healthy is what matters! | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 9/9/2007 6:17:13 PM |
The number of past partners should never be the topic of discussion. Someone's past should not be an issue. Your focus should be on the present only.
When I hear something like this, it makes me think "your numbers must be very high". Not that this is true in your case, but it's like women who say "size doesn't matter". Yeah, right. | |
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| What's the number that would scare you off for GOOD?
Posted: 9/9/2007 6:19:28 PM | I'm not sure that a number would scare me off but....
I'm a hyper honest person. If the subject comes up, I expect honesty. A large number is a slight turn off for me purely because it implies a great difference in personality regarding sex.... but at the same time, I like people that can communicate openly around that subject, so it's not necessarily a deal breaker. This is one of those situations where I try to be open minded because I really don't know how I would act in reality. | |
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