| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 1:52:44 PM | Guys are basically jerks?
Man I hate reading that.... I think that anyone can be a jerk.. male or female.. doesnt matter what the gender is ... I was raised with basically only male friends, almost all male cousins and I learned alot about the male viewpoint. Ive had the same best friend for 32 years.. a guy... and there hasnt been a day in 32 years that he has been a jerk to me.
The whole barbie thing.. yeeesh. Do this for me OP... try thinking of yourself as a good looking intelligent woman..and guess what.. someone ELSE will too.
Im not perfect, Im not thin...Im not rich etc.... Im human and fragile and can be hurt by words just like anyone else... BUT.. I love who I am and what Ive become as Ive gotten older. I joined POF to see what was out there and I can say I have met some great people. Have I met THE one? Maybe.. I dont know what the future holds. Maybe he is just an email away. But do I sit and lament that Im not barbie when my email doesnt get a response or no one emails me in a week or so? Heck no. Life goes on. | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 1:55:18 PM | Ok, I am going to start by saying that I am sorry if this offends the OP or anyone else on this thread for that matter......BUT DAMN!!!!
OP, you only joined 9 days ago and you are already complaining about not getting any replies???!!!???? I hate to see how you act in a month.
I am sorry but this is getting so unbelievably OLD....thread after thread....why oh why won't people reply.
There is only ONE answer....they don't want to.
________________________________________________________________
To future posters of this thread: Please don't call me a **** like I am sure some of you will......it just gets sooooo old seeing this same complaint over and over and over again.  | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 1:59:48 PM | | I agree you have to be patient if you cant this is not the place for you. I am into this now i love it Guess what i read some more and i read this satement " ALL GUYS ARE JERKS BECAUSE LOOKS MATTER" they do I am not going to be with someone i am not physically attraced to because they are a nice person if you dont take care of yourself then that reflects your personality . Looks are important does that make me shallow? no it makes me human. | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 2:02:46 PM | Suzieq31 says guys are basicaly jerks and that its all physical. The truth is that physical plays an INITIAL part of attraction - no way around that folks. but I've never known a beautiful vessel to overcome an unpleasant personality. A female jerk (jerkette?) is just as common as a male one.
Some of the women contibuting to this thread are stunning to look at - so it took me a few moments to get to reading their profiles to see what they had to say. But I did read them, too.  | |
|
| |
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 5:51:54 PM | I just noticed you've only been here 9 days. A little patience and you might find someone nice. You're looking for long-term, and someone to share your life with. But after 9 days you're already getting frustrated?
You're right though, you definetly need a better photo.
It might also be about the type of men you're checking out. It sounds like you are going after looks first and the rest second when you ask for the tall guy with a bike. It just seems that you have an IMAGE that you want filled out, but you're willing to settle if you have to. If that's what you put in your profile, I'll bet that's how pick which people to contact as well.
If you put more qualities about yourself, and the men that you're attracted to, that might help with the responses. I hope you have better luck, and the ones that do respond are worth checking out. Good Luck.
also, if this seemed mean, not how it was intended. Just didn't know how to be honest with this one and keep it light too.
 | |
|
| |
| |
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 7:02:36 PM | | Maybe people are finding the several paragraphs long dissertations a little too intense, especially if they have not initiated the contact. Just because it is the internet, doesn't mean our own personal habits, biases and hangups necessarily change. If someone you didn't know came up to you and just began commenting on what they perceive as your personality, would you be as receptive to them as stranger who came up to you, smiled warmly and said hello how are you. | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 8:02:38 PM | This is just a thought ~ but after doing quite a few profile reviews here ~ maybe it's not the physical appearance that is the deal breaker. What I saw was a whole bunch of nice, attractive ladies with the same profile. It was almost like it was carbon copied from person to person. I have online dated for many (too many) years and I do NOT use a profile about romance, walking on beaches, communication, spending time with the kids, loving my animals, etc. I think that after seeing dozens (or more) of those, it would be terribly mudane. Write a profile about "who" you are....not what you like to do. Everyone is unique, interesting, and we all have qualities specific for who we are. I rarely browse profiles, but when I see "I love to hike, spend time with my kids (they are my life), I just want someone perfect for me" etc., I instantly think ~ OH DEAR...another hiker. Jazz it up, make yourself memorable.
It's just my opinion ~ but Barbies are such a rare find. And they come with some pretty big issues: she's high maintenance, doesn't have a job, she requires itsy tiny shoes, her social skills suck, and Ken is gay ~ what man wants to date that?? LOL
Think positively. Look at all the threads on this topic. Men and women complain about this. Stop looking so hard, just have a good time while you're here and see what happens. This is not speed-dating. It's just like the real world except you have the option to meet people from all over the world. What a gift. Good luck OP!! | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 8:24:25 PM | | ya know, i used to think the same way...that if I wasn't thin, tall and tan then men didn't want anything to do with me, but I was wrong. If you just keep your hope going and never give up then believe me you'll find that guy. I have had tonz of responses from great looking guys and i am definitly not a barbie, so just keep trying!!!! | |
|
| |
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 9:00:02 PM | Even if you're not attracted to the person that contacts you, I think it's very rude to just ignore them. We all should appreciate it when someone finds us attractive enough to write. It's like a slap in the face if you get no response.  | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 9:21:31 PM | You look very young and with a name like sweetfishy of course you will get tons of messages and offers. That open minded thing to me means, you must accept all kinds of kooky things but must be a traditional doormat, no brainer, a fairy princess, I am not saying you are that, but lady try being 54 years old and reading profiles that demand someone between the ages of 35 and 60. I wonder why they put it up to 60, trying to look open minded I guess.
Most men in my experience think big teeth, big hair and a magazine body is an oddity they can be open minded about. I am an outdoor type and look it, my hands are callused and my skin has wrinkles, but that is a NO No in men seeking women. Hey I have lots of warmth and a great personality but I also know too much and that is another reason I am overlooked. I perhaps could pose like a bimbo with a pouty face and change my nickname to fishlips or fishtail and would get more attention, but I value myself too much to be a piece of meat.
If you have found so many wonderful, very attractive men then, why are you in this place? I am outa here. | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 9:28:00 PM | oh dusty duty dusty!
you're mad and you have no reason to be! I'm 41 and I think you are just great! i would date you in a new york second! sorry you haven't met any guy's on here with any kind of class!
ya you're thinkin compliments from a dead stinkin' fish [but I'm really a kinda cute guy!]
I may be a trash can ornament but I'm the best damned ornament I can be!!!
the capn' | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/20/2006 10:15:25 PM |
You look very young and with a name like sweetfishy of course you will get tons of messages and offers. That open minded thing to me means, you must accept all kinds of kooky things but must be a traditional doormat, no brainer, a fairy princess, I am not saying you are that, but lady try being 54 years old and reading profiles that demand someone between the ages of 35 and 60. I wonder why they put it up to 60, trying to look open minded I guess.
Most men in my experience think big teeth, big hair and a magazine body is an oddity they can be open minded about. I am an outdoor type and look it, my hands are callused and my skin has wrinkles, but that is a NO No in men seeking women. Hey I have lots of warmth and a great personality but I also know too much and that is another reason I am overlooked. I perhaps could pose like a bimbo with a pouty face and change my nickname to fishlips or fishtail and would get more attention, but I value myself too much to be a piece of meat.
If you have found so many wonderful, very attractive men then, why are you in this place? I am outa here.
Alright, since I am the only sweetfishy on here I am going to assume this is directed to me????  Sorry, I am having trouble containing my laughter! I look very young????? As of today, I am 36 and a mom of 3 boys! I changed my user ID to a sweet fishy becasue I got tired of people slamming me for being lonely because of my last one (it was lonely_mamma) and my lonliness had ended anyway. I have my share of wrinkles (yeah, they aren't huge, but they ARE there) and there is absolutely NOTHING perfect (or even close) about me. Very common looking, down to earth lady actually. Heck, I don't even wear makeup.......don't have any on in any of my pics. I have yet to pose like a bimbo, and I won't even start on the wonderful men in my life or I will just start getting ripped apart for that......as usual. I am here for the forums. Yeah, it is a dating site, but when I no longer needed a man I already had a forum addiction and had made some dear friends. | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/21/2006 7:39:15 AM | | Country girl forgive me if this has been answered before since I did not read the whole thread. I understand your question is heart felt. You do not want to be judged soley on your physicality. But you said you want a guy 6 feet tall. Now the average height in the USA is 5 foot 7 to 5 foot 9. So you are also judging by physical qualities and in fact you want a man of greater than average height. Wouldnt that be equivalent to a man saying he only wants a woman in greater than average fitness? Also men/women can not control their height. If a man or a woman is over weight he or she can go on a diet to reduce their weight. I'm on a diet right now myself. But their height is how god made them. Dont you think this is a bit of a double standard in how you are approaching this thread? Anyway thats just my thoughts. I could be totally wrong. In fact I often am. :) | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/21/2006 7:44:16 AM | hahahahhaa
you get rejected once or twice and now you get mad because your ego is hurt?
try being a guy
try being rejected in front of 5-6 women while you ask the one you like out. try smiling and walking back with pride because you at least tried. and this is in front of a lot of people. i could go on and on and on...
you need to change your attitude and your perception.
you want some advice? get over it | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/21/2006 7:55:59 AM | you seriously need to make your profile more attractive. take some better pictures for one...that picture you have up looks like it has been printed and soaked in water, scanned, and stepped on. A digital camera if you don't have one is very cheap these days and if you don't have or want one you are sure to have a friend who does that would be happy to take some pictures for you.
also, your profile needs a lot of work. You are not being very discriptive in your profile at all. I do not form any impression of what you are like. Nothing personal...lots like yours on here, but if you want to seriously find someone, and get some responses you need to spend a little more time to create a profile that people would find atttractive.
by the way, it is not mandatory that you set an age range criteria. Open minded? you may find someone who iis 46 or 47 that may be your kinda guy (not me), yet he would not be able to send an email to you because of your age criteria. | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/21/2006 7:58:48 AM | i am goin to defend most guys..not all are jerks...dont hate them love them. i feel sorry for some guys who are jerks cause they wont find true happiness in their lives. to bad some guys ruin it for most....but we cant gerneralize them all in the same category.
does it really matter what others perfer? i mean seriously think bout it..i couldnt careless how many dont like my body or my looks or whatever....thats their problem not mine. do we judge how our friends looks?? not at all we accept them for who they are irreguardless....so ask yourself this....why treat anyone else differently? everyone gets rejected an no one likes it but its part of life. so many are used to getting theyre ways an now days its not working..deal with it...an move on...lifes to short.
i make choices in life and thats for me to decide not anyone else...i chose my friends carefully and wisely....an whom i associate with on a daily bases...or to whom i wish to talk to....so its up to us what we tolerate but that doesnt mean we have to give our opinion bout it. i would rather not waste my time an effort on those who are negative in life an need to be fueled to keep the fire going....eventually it will dye off on its own. remember..its very lonely at the top all alone. many have taken small things for granted in life an dont appreciate the good when it comes...little things in life that matter...so sad to see...i am thankful every morning to be breathing an healthy for some dont have that option. so its up to you. so if someone sends you a message ...be happy someone is thinking bout you an smile.
people come an go from our lives an some leave foot prints in our hearts but some will stay forever. | |
|
| |
| |
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/21/2006 9:37:25 AM |
Well, I am not even close to a Barbie......I also have yet to be "overlooked". When I first joined I couldn't keep up with the messages I got. I have never had a problem finding wonderful, very attractive men. I honestly think it is based on perception of warmth and a terrific personality. I would warm up the profile and I think things will change.
Have to agree totally. I'm about as far from Barbie as it's going to get. But I think if you put a little more personality in your profile and go get some great shots of you you'll be surprised! Good luck. | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/21/2006 10:39:30 AM | Lots of very attractive people go through an awkward stage in life. Attractive people were not always attractive at the beginning.
I went through a gawky weird stage growing up with glasses and big giant braces. I also had acne and for a while, was the tallest person in a couple of my classes. Its kind of rude to just label all attractive people into one category because you think they are all vapid and shallow and have no perspective on life.
If you want to look good, you have to make an effort. Attractive people don't stay attractive by sitting on the couch eating chips and candy. There are alot of people who are very beautiful and handsome but they don't try at all, and all those nice things about them is covered by their own fear of failure.
If you don't make an effort with your appearance, you are telling the world they don't need to make an effort to date you. It's that simple. | |
|
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 7/21/2006 10:55:23 AM | Oh give me a break, COUNTRYGIRLJO. The men on this website are snubbed to an orders of magnitude higher degree than the women here when they send out their messages, despite how thoughtful they are. And the most common response from the women is "we just get so many... we can't possibly be expected to read them all."
Thing is, the men who actually post in complaint of this behavior on the part of women usually write very decently and respectfully, and the women complain that they are inundated with an endless supply of E-mails to the tune of "hey u r fine lets hook up k?" These are NOT the same men who post in complaint. Furthermore, the number of women who complain about this are paltry in comparison to the men's figures. And as anyone can tell you, both genders on this site have little shame about moaning and griping. It simply isn't an issue for women, collectively at least. If you are a woman on this site, you are on average going to experience an E-mail volume several times that of men without lifting a finger. If you're not, try posting a better picture and see what happens. | |
|
Home
login 
