| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 4:24:51 AM | I recently read a post by a woman who said that she got plenty of emails w/out a picture, and when she put up a picture of herself in a bikini, which looked like she belonged on Baywatch, and was the way she looks in real life, all she got was loads of emails saying that she was putting up a false picture. I didn't believe it myself, and posted a similar message.
It's all about attitude. Women who get attention believe men are attracted to them, and men pick up on that. Women who don't, often think that men are only attracted to Barbie dolls, and show it in their pictures and the way they write their profile, and make it happen to themselves.
I create my own reality! Frank Herbert: Children of Dune. | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 5:01:19 AM |
Because men don't want fat chicks(like me) They want paper thin, wafer-like chicks that will have sex 24/7, and won't complain. So if you have curves and an opinion, men automatically don't want you.
^^ Not singling you out Nautical - but how in the hell did it come to this? ... this broad generalization, each gender painting the other with the same grey brush.
It really is about preferences that each person has.
Each person who becries and laments that men/women should stop being so 'shallow', accept a person for who they are, etc. has at some point rejected someone else based on that person's physical appearance.
I know the sting of rejection - on this site even more so.
But people need to stop demanding that others accept them for 'who they are' when they do the same damn thing to others ... and instead of being 'shallow' (which they would call the man/woman who rejected them), they are being 'sincere and honest' in their rejection of another.
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 5:39:24 AM | You know what. I hope I don't come across bashing too bad long long nite. But dang....Even the headline of this post set my teeth on edge this am..
I dont' believe anyone is looking for a barbie or a ken.. I have been on this site now for almost 3 months. Gawd that makes me an oldtimer.. NO!!! never wanted that. anyway..Back to topic
Men looking for a Barbie... Well even men are smart enough to know she doesn't exist except in Plastic..the Physical beauty is so fleeting and can be destroyed in a heartbeat..the inner beauty of a person is what shines thru in everything they do.. Period.
I do get alot of emails.some days I flat can't answer them all. sorry ppl I do fall behind but I now limit to answering 60 aday..I also believe a small percentage is over my looks, since I am not to hard on the eyes and I clean up pretty good. I will believe the majority of them came from my profile when it was up and running. and who I am..
When I see these posts on men not wanting.. where have all the good men gone... The list is endless. Then ask a girl. I see I am a nice guy.. Well maybe if you have to tell me that what are you hiding. Why don't you reply .... These to me are all complaints that tend to transfer your crappy attitude in life onto a whole other gender.
I also have wondered many times you are on a dating site.. Isn't this where if you are looking you are going to really put yourself out there. I mean dang if you get up on the wrong side of the bed. Or someone ate the last bowl of wheaties. I see it in men and women.. I often wonder if these same people that can't at least be civil going to be single till they are 80..
anyway my ramble is done | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 6:11:41 AM | You dont have a pic up . people like to see who they are talking to Barbie lookalike or not. How you view yourself is even more important than how you look. The message you are giving in your beleif that you must look like Barbie in order to be loved is false and you give out that message as you seak to be wanted "I dont look like Barbie therefore im not worthy of you speaking to me" Change how you perceve men and know that NONE OF THEM ARE LOOKING FOR BARBIE OR KEN. They are looking for perfect loving you. Stop the anger at being passed by and love you.. you will then give out signals that you are ready to be loved in return. What you give is what you get. It all starts from you.
Remember these words from audry Hepburn.
For attractive lips speak words of kindness
For lovley eyes seek out the good in people
For beautiful hair let a child run his or her fingers through it once a day
For poise walk with the knowledge that you will never walk alone.
People even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived reclaimed and redeemed, never throw out anyone.
Did you know that if shop mannequins were real women they'd be too thin to menstruate?
There are 3 billion women who don't look like supermodels ...and only
Eight who do.
Marilyn Monroe wore a size 14.
If Barbie was a real woman, she'd have to walk on all fours due to her proportions.
Beauty of a Woman -
The beauty of a woman Is not in
The clothes she wears
The figure she carries
Or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman
Must be seen from her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman
Is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman
Is reflected in her soul.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
The passion that she shows,
The beauty of a woman
With passing years-only grows. | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 6:17:24 AM | Let me get this straight, if you're beautiful or pretty you automatically have no inner beauty. Is that what everyone is saying????
That's a bunch of crock, I met many people and inner beauty is not reserved to average or the less than advantaged by nature. Sometimes quite the opposite.
You have nasty, shallow, complaining, critical people in every category. It's not reserved to the barbies and Kens. As you have perfectly content and happy people in all category's.
Anyone who complains that others are getting all the attention and not them should look deeper in themselves and ask themselves why? Stop blaming outside factors.
As you can see I'm pissed with the Barbie and Ken comments. | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 6:20:18 AM | Each and every one of us, no matter whom, no matter what gender, we're all 'face value' when it comes to judging the opposite sex. None are exempt.
I get a great deal of guys simply looking at my pic and sending off a message that implies such like, "I'd like to get to know you and date you.," Albeit they clearly have not read my profile.
Therein, too, lies 'judging' when it comes to a simple photograph! | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 6:33:44 AM | For the same reason that men get overlooked if they aren't Tom Sellick (am I dating myself or what!?!?).
Yes, it is frustrating that women who say they are looking for friendship don't respond too.
That's the way of the world. | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 7:16:15 AM | ok 1st of all has everyone noticed she quit the site in 2006? lol sry its humorous alot of u are still givin advice to someone who isnt even on here anymore.
this isnt advice to anyone but just a point.
yes alot of guys like the "barbie" type but there are also others that like a curvy woman or even bigger woman and its the same for men.. i myself dont prefer "ken" ...sure its great u look after urself and be healthy, but alot of them have the "im holier than thow" egos and attitudes that go with it when they r all pumped up.
For me its all about personality and attitude..sure u have to b somewhat physically attracted in the the 1st place but its not all about the perfect body anymore!
btw some of us dont put pics up cause we r ugly etc some of us just dont want everyone in their little towns etc to harass them cause they are actually on a dating site etc lol.  | |
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dpd22
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Joined: 11/9/2006
Msg: 110 | |
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 8:14:35 AM |
Because men don't want fat chicks(like me) They want paper thin, wafer-like chicks that will have sex 24/7, and won't complain. So if you have curves and an opinion, men automatically don't want you.
Another broad and false generalization. If a man isn't attracted to fat women, it doesn't that he only likes very thin women. There is a wide range of body types because fat and very thin. BTW there is a difference between curvy and fat.
Let me get this straight, if you're beautiful or pretty you automatically have no inner beauty. Is that what everyone is saying????
That's a bunch of crock, I met many people and inner beauty is not reserved to average or the less than advantaged by nature. Sometimes quite the opposite.
You have nasty, shallow, complaining, critical people in every category. It's not reserved to the barbies and Kens. As you have perfectly content and happy people in all category's.
I agree. Some people can be physically attractive and have a great personality. Some people can have one, but not the other. Some people have neither attribute. | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/18/2007 9:53:59 AM | *cough*selfpity*cough*
K...I'm heardly a barbie doll and I have the men tripping overthem selves to spend 10 min with me
Not bragging...just fact
If you are angry at all men cause the captain of the football team didn't take you to the prom...then you're going in with the wrong attitude
You need ot be more up beat and more over CONFIDANT
In my head I'm the least confidant person ever...but when I'm out I exude confidance and thats what works
Also...not everybody likes the same kinda people...some guys are gonna like barbie dolls...others are gonna like suicide girls...some like sporty, others like country/girl next door..dating is a numbers game | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 11:39:59 AM |
Because men don't want fat chicks(like me) They want paper thin, wafer-like chicks that will have sex 24/7, and won't complain. So if you have curves and an opinion, men automatically don't want you.
I am fairly skinny, I'm good to go just about any time when it comes to sex and really quite easy going so I don't complain much (really if I were more laid back sometimes I'd be in a coma) and my ex boyfriend STILL complained
Some men don't know what they want...
He wouldn't date a fat chick but wasn't happy with the 'hot' chick either | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 12:05:17 PM | To the person complaining about SassySky not having a picture up:
She did have one up for a while. And some guys put in their forum replies that the picture must have been fake.
OT As for me, of the women I have dated and/or married: 2 would be classified as thin, several have been height/weight proportionate (average), but 1/2 have been in the 'few extra pounds' to BBW category.
Having actually met Salma Hayek and talked to her, I would have been very happy to date her had it been possible. She is only about 5' 3" without heels.
So I am not predisposed one way or the other.
The #1 dealbreaker in considering someone to date or marry has always been attitude. If she has a bad one she could be Helen of Troy, Marilyn Monroe and Christina Aguilar rolled into one package and I STILL wouldn't date her, even for money. Heck, I probably wouldn't even jump in the sack with her for NSA sex. (*** Maybe for a couple million, tax free, I might endure a couple dates, lol.) | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 12:42:08 PM | Barbie and Ken? Ask yourself - do they sell as many Mr and Mrs Shrek dolls?
It's all strictly fantasy. I would imagine even a small girl who plays with Barbie dolls and has a princess costume knows she isn't really a princess and she looks around and sees that most people don't really look like her Ken and Barbie dolls in real life.
In my opinion anyone who expects that has just not grown up. A real adult understands that a person is a person and doesn't expect a fantasy person. On the other hand, a real adult does not blame the failure of acquiring a satisfactory partner on not looking like a stereotypical fantasy doll.
During my lifetime I have seen nearly any combination of couples that you can imagine and they've all seemed happy together. That tells me that anyone has the potential of finding the right partner for themselves and that no matter what you look like, someone out there (and most likely several) will find you attractive.
On the other hand, I have found that those people who do look like Ken and Barbie have the same problem. To the rest of us, they would all look smashing but to them, they pick each other according to really silly details. A woman who was otherwise very beautiful might have a nose that was slightly crooked and she would be seen as an ugly "Barbie" to them. | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 12:56:02 PM | I said this same thing quite often. Hell, I've been told I'm attractive (I don't see it, but then nobody ever does I guess) But I get ignored too.
Personally I'm very open minded & I'm not into the 'barbie doll' type, I like women with a brain & the ability to hold up their end of a conversation, but I basically say this in my profile. I guess that scares most women, that a guy could specifically want something diffrent than the norm. | |
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myso
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Joined: 8/26/2007
Msg: 118 | |
| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 3:00:21 PM | remember when your not a barbie just be comfortable stand out in the right way....if you can look good for you and be okay with that .other people will notice your comfort level and say something positive .when you think positive you will usually end up feeling positive . and smile it helps  | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 3:26:24 PM | Not Barbie, but isn't Barbie considered the North Amercian female ideal?
How many guys in real life are with a woman who looks anywhere near Barbie? Very very few.
What they want, and what end up with, are two completely different things. And for all us non-Barbie ladies out there, that should be an encouragement.
Seems many men no matter what their age. looks and fitness level , are quite confident they can attract a Barbie. So they keep aiming for that ideal lady, until exhausation and disappointment merge with the cold facts of reality.....it just ain't gonna happen.
Many of us ladies are guilty of the same fantasyland expectations of our ideal mate.
I say, hold out for your ideal , keep searching and keep trying. The worse that can happen is you completely by pass that average lady or guy who thinks the world of you.
If you can live with that..... | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 3:42:57 PM | | hay i am a guy and i say all the time why are women only intrested in loosers!. relly you see a nice women and there with these low life looses. that dont even have a car and live with there mom. so its not just you. i have a nice house,new car, and make 55,000 a year. and i am single myself. so dont get down in the dumps about it. | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 3:52:07 PM | Well, I am no Barbie myself and wouldn't wish to be one!
I much prefer to be tagged as a 'Friend of Barbie' ...you know the less intimiditating, deeper, wittier and more approachable one.
Beside, who wants to be like a Barbie and attract the likes of Ken??..
I like my man to be more Manly with the right working tool...(everyone that saw Ken without his kakis knows what I mean)  | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 4:04:48 PM | | I read once that if you took the proportions kept to scale to a woman standing roughly 5'6" to six foot tall, that a woman who truly had Barbie's measurements it would look grotesque. At least, that was held true for original designs of the doll. It was an article I read I beleive that announced a redesign of the original doll. Mind you, my information is a bit outdated, I used to watch the history channel often during my college years and it had something about that I beleive. Anyway, someone who is attracted to the barbie doll look is a quote end quote, "leg man". A man who finds long elegant looking legs as incredibly attractive. Mind you, men and women both have physical aspects of the gender in which they are attracted to as attractive. Yeah, there are men who are strongly attracted to tall leggy blondes as the saying goes, but not all men are that way. Some men are attracted to other areas of the body, whatever that may be. Therefore, your statement is for the most part sexist in that you grouped all men together into a single collective conciousness concerning the subject and used a generalization of what is considered attractive in the feminine form, which in a round about way is an insult to women. Therefore, as I read from previous statements, I would request that you please halt further use of generalizations that may insult large groups purely by association. You wouldn't make a racial slur on here would you? No. Of course not, it is an offensive gesture to a sub-group of humanity. The same applies here, men and women alike should not be treated in such a broad reaching scope with such concepts presented in your statement. You can not claim to be open minded if you think of the world in such black and white, generalized viewpoints that you yourself used in this forum. | |
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| How come if you are not A BARBIE you are overlooked....
Posted: 10/19/2007 4:26:42 PM | It would be interesting to do statistics on what the "average" physical attributes and "age range" is for women that the "average" man finds attractive and visa versa. Has anyone heard of any such study?
Serre1 | |
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