| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 2:16:42 AM | I think the thread is good idea, now there should be one for the guys. I think though that you can spend X amount of weeks chatting, then go to X amount of phone conversation and you won't know the truth until you see body language, even then it's not a guarantee.
The real player is not interested in sex per se it's the game he likes, so he's not the one asking for sex on the first email. The name says it all he likes to play.
The thread would be very useful if the real players tricks were discussed, the hormonally challenged males are actually the most obvious and easy to manage, it's the more subtle ones that are dangerous .
Kudos to most of the men's comments here I enjoyed them. | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 4:15:21 AM | | What abou the guys that work out to simply be as healthy as they should be? Or perhaps there are guys that are employed by a job that requires physical exercise. I loved all of the tips except the one about guys working out. I must say that as a person that has been in martial arts for 19 years, I have noticed that apart from steroid muscle heads, most people I have met at the gym are quite civilized and happy. Endorphines are a great source for a happy generating attitude. I think that in all honesty we would not want anybody that does not take care of themselves and atleast "work out" once a week.Would we? I mean even if it is jogging. I cant imagine being physically unhealthy and I am proud that I am. | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 4:55:36 AM | Thank you evansp23. Good advise but unfortunately some still slide through the cracks.
Yes some men are definately players, jerks and losers but we have to keep and open mind to the fact that there are many, many good people on here too.
I will and always have kept an open mind so will not pre judge anyone until you talk and your little bits of info pop out.
When sex is brought up in the 1st conversation I deffinately agree (Delete/Block.)
Thanks for you help and no tea but having my 1st coffee of the day.   | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 9:12:28 AM |
LOOK, these sites are predominately for sex addicts.
Oh FFS! How'd he find that out??? GRRRRRRRRRR! Well.. cats' outta the bag now!
A good player plays! The better he is, the less sign he leaves. It isn't about talking sex in the first e-mail, that's a fool.
It always gives me a tickle how players think they are so smooth and covert.
It does not involve much of a concerted effort or much in the way of stealthiness to convince many women that you're the real deal. Many are so blinded by your initial claims, you can pretty much pull anything over on them afterwards.
This is not a testament to your deviousness, dear Player... but to some women's stupidity.
The majority of the time, players are about as obvious as a pair of lime green testicles protruding from one's forehead. | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 3:53:23 PM | Ey there, Lux, I really do hope you're not trying to make me out as a player..Same goes to you, captainstink..I don't play games! I simply plan on dating however many women it takes until I find the one I'm gonna marry. Maybe you wanna marry the first guy you meet, then no sex til marriage, but hey, feel free to up the divorce rate.
OP-You have to shop around aaaannnd take a test drive before purchasing your new ride. | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 8:07:56 PM |
4. Grammar. Guy's who cant speak like a normal person and use words that you stopped using once you passed third grade. Typo's are ok, unless it's so butchered that u cant even tell what word they are trying to say. A way a person talks shows how they act and think. Most businesses will NOT hire someone who talks like a wanna be rapper.
Am I the only person who noticed the irony in this particular paragraph of pontification by the OP? | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 8:49:50 PM | To evanesp23, good stuff dude...However ladies some things to consider, if a guy states that he's really seriouse about hitting the gym and being physically active of course he's gonna post alot of pics of his muscles *just a side note
And I honestly feel like most (if not all) of these points can be applied to females on here.
Wow!!!(insert ladies screen name) has sooooooo much depth to her. She says she lives to make out with hot guys at the loudest clubs in town and wake up with a killer hangover every weekend. She also notes that any guy who tries to msg her better be "damn fine" with pics to prove it or not even waste her time. And to top it all off she has posted numerous airial pics of her chest and her pink thong peeking out of her cute lil "booty shorts" to top it off (*not that i'm complaining about the pics just making a point).
I think these types of ppl are made for each other bahahaha. | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 9:40:30 PM | OP...good attempt at trying to help the ladies...a little generalized and sometimes stereotypical...but your heart appears to be in the right place at least 
Codex...your sense of humour is priceless...loved you wit etc from the first post here onward
Capn'...you reek of wisdom!
And now...to my two cents worth....
The obvious players..most women can spot a mile away...less she's 16 and fresh out of the starting gate. These boys are often charming, smooth...and look for all kinds of "innocent" ways to get to your zipper...as quickly as possible.
The subtle players..while often also quite charming etc...are a little more challenging to spot..less your old like me...then it gets easier
Beware of the man that tells you that he has a "busy" schedule..one so busy he can only make time for you when it seems "right" for him. One that must "plan" all visits with you..and becomes hesitant if you decide to get "spontaneous".
Beware of the man that tells you he likes you...thinks you are great...but keeps making excuses, "buying" time as it were, on getting too committed or involved. If after several dates...you keep getting the " I'm not sure what I want...I have a lot going on in my life right now...I need to get a few things in my life in order"...etc etc etc etc......beware!!
Beware of the man that showers you all too quickly with compliments...wants to meet you yesterday not next week...spends hoards of money on you...saying that he just lovvvves to pamper a woman.
And before any one jumps on me...hehe...there are exceptions to every situation...be aware of these signs and only become wary of them..if there are other warning signs ( your instincts going off like a fire alarm for example ) to go along with them.
A smart woman...as the good ole cap'n said...should ask pointed questions...find ways to test his gentlemanliness...if he says something that sends up warning flags...call him up on it. How a man answers direct questioning...( don't be like a cop interrogating though...lol)...how a man answers subleties...and how a man reacts to your answers etc....will speak volumes about him. Never be too available to the "busy" player..and you will see him for what he is quite quickly. Never be to understanding to the " I need time" player... a man that really likes you...doesn't need "time" to figure it out. Annnnd...never fall head over heels for the "shower" player...if he is "showering you so much that quickly..he is likely just trying to distract you from something he doesn't want you to see.
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 10:34:44 PM | | ok so i have a question. what does it mean when u have talked to a guy online 4 like 2 or 3 weeks, no sex talk. Then u meet up, you hang out for about 4 hours everything is good, he says he likes u, u tell him don't run ur game on me, he still tells u he likes u then u have sex at the end of the night. He wakes up tells u he just wants to spend time with only u from now on and that he really likes u. Then over the next couple of days he says he will hang out with u but u don't though he still calls and still talks to u online and still tells u he wants to see you again. Please tell me what that's about? | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/23/2006 11:49:39 PM |
he says he likes u, u tell him don't run ur game on me,
*This* is the problem.
Not saying *this* guy is necessarily a player. But the problem is, you can't just ask someone--*anyone*--"are you trying to manipulateme/lie to me/seduce and then drop me?" Because an honest person and a dishonest person will say the exact same thing--"No, of course not!" The only way you *might* be able to tell--and it isn't a guarantee--is that if a person gets very outraged that you might dare question her or her integrity--if they get really mad and make a speech about it--then *that* person might bear watching. Many or most honest people don't mind your saying that you need to learn how to trust them slowly, because they know that their behavior is going to match their words. They have nothing to worry about. Dishonest people will often try to make you feel ashamed for even questioning them.
There *is* no absolutely safe way to know if you can trust a person. The best way to deal with it is to trust someone--*anyone*--only a little bit at a time. And if you were fooled or made a mistake, don't beat yourself up. Just do better next time.
~~Dolly | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/24/2006 5:41:35 AM | 1. Guy's with a lot of body pictures. Pics of the abs and crap. Douche bags, they only want u to like them for their body. they cant post anything else because it might require they have to talk to you, which is something they dont know how to do.
Or maybe they know that women don't read the profiles any more than men. They just click on a pic they like a lot of the time. And until you've got dialogue, they have no other way to differentiate themselves. Or maybe they don't know what they're supposed to do in this environment and they're just apeing what they see.
2. Guy's who take pics with other girls in provocative manner. Again, they want u to see that they can get a lot of girls, so why are they bothering on this site if they have girls around them all the time? They think that by showing u that that u'll be more interested...WRONG.
Or maybe they know that they often WILL be more interested. Because you look like you're living life and having fun, not sitting woodenly staring at the camera you're holding in your hand while you sit home alone wishing someone would talk to you.
3. Guy's whose interests revolve around: Drinking, working out, clubs and partying. They have nothing to offer except the fact that they always know where the keg is. If you want shallow, then thats all they are. If they cant even pretend to be interested in something that is mature then u should not try to expect an Einstein conversation with them.
Yeah. Because there aren't any women who like those things. Deep down inside, they want to be dating Einstein so they can finally put a stop to all this childish fun stuff like taking care of themselves and socializing.
4. Grammar. Guy's who cant speak like a normal person and use words that you stopped using once you passed third grade. Typo's are ok, unless it's so butchered that u cant even tell what word they are trying to say. A way a person talks shows how they act and think. Most businesses will NOT hire someone who talks like a wanna be rapper.
That's right. Spelling and grammar are the ultimate judgement of intelligence. Except my brother, who has a 4.0 GPA in university and works in neuroscience but can't spell to save his life.
5. If a guy even HINTS at sex in his first post, delete on sight (and block). The more you do this the less they will attempt it. Real guys dont want sex at first because they dont want a girl to give it up so easily. They want someone who they can know first, talk with, spend a little quality time with, and then when you are into the relationship and decide thats what you want, you can get as kinky as you want.
Of course. When you're looking for someone to date, you need to be very careful not to show any attraction or flirtation. What are these guys on?
6. Guys who write 2-5 word messages. Self explanitory, since their brain isnt focused on anything other then hiding their drunkenness. A real guy might be jaded since he can write a paragraph or two and not get a reply back (or even the dreaded "read:deleted"), but that doesnt mean "Hey baby, whats up?" is acceptable for anyone!!! A real guy will show that he READ your profile, say what he likes about you and what interests you share. If he cant even name an interest you wrote then he doesnt care about you, just your body pictures.
I must not be a real guy. Real guys write long love letters to every stranger they'd like to get into a dialogue with. Guess those women who don't have a long involved profile full of seeds for the imagination aren't even worth introducing yourself to. I know if someone said to me "Hey baby, what's up?", I'd probably say "Screw you, you insensitive ****! Where's MY love letter? Don't you know I like capoeira, dancing, playing harmonica and discussing social issues? How dare you talk to me like I'm some stranger you've never met before!"
Yeah. Put up your filters and walls, and keep judging these guys without ever talking to them and making bitter posts in the forums about "where are all the real men". Cause that's going to get you dates. | |
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| Girls, here are some tips written by a guy (me) to show you how to spot phonies/scumbags
Posted: 7/24/2006 9:25:38 AM | ok so i have a question. what does it mean when u have talked to a guy online 4 like 2 or 3 weeks, no sex talk. Then u meet up, you hang out for about 4 hours everything is good, he says he likes u, u tell him don't run ur game on me, he still tells u he likes u then u have sex at the end of the night. He wakes up tells u he just wants to spend time with only u from now on and that he really likes u. Then over the next couple of days he says he will hang out with u but u don't though he still calls and still talks to u online and still tells u he wants to see you again.
In poker, this is called a "slow play". 
Seriously, this scenario could be almost anything. Have you tried discussing this matter with him? I think he'd give you the best answer.
Your attitude about him is a bit interesting, about him getting what he wanted. Have you asked yourself if you got what you wanted? Sounds like you both might be playing the same game, judging him would be like calling his kettle black while thinking your black kettle was white. Explain to me how he is lying if you haven't made any effort to talk to him since your rendezvous. | |
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