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Show ALL Forums  > humor  > Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes      Home login  
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 plugsback
Joined: 10/18/2007
Msg: 101
Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted JokesPage 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
This one ain't quite as sick, but it's borderline



Two gays, one dies, the other asks for his body to be made into a curry, the undertaker is amazed at such a request and asks why? To which the gay says, "I loved him so much, I just want to feel him make my ass burn one last time as he dribbles out"!!!
 plugsback
Joined: 10/18/2007
Msg: 102
Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/21/2008 9:01:27 AM
3 old prostitutes sitting in the pub talking about how hard times are now there's a lot of immigrant girls doing it for half price.
The first one say's, "Last night I had to let a bloke f**k me over a bench in the park for a fiver so I could get food for the kids breakfast."
The second one said, "Yesterday I had to take it up the a$$ for a fiver on the river bank so I could buy food for the kids tea"!!
The 3rd one is sitting there saying nothing, the other 2 ask how things have been for her?
She replied, "Last night I had to give a guy a BJ for nothing.....just so I had a hot drink before I went to bed"!!
 plugsback
Joined: 10/18/2007
Msg: 103
Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/21/2008 10:30:28 AM
What's black and f*cks rabbits and hedgehogs??


Lorry tyres!!
 kickoutthejams
Joined: 9/9/2007
Msg: 104
Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/21/2008 10:38:38 PM
What has two legs and bleeds?
Half a dog
 barefootbaby78
Joined: 10/29/2007
Msg: 105
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Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/21/2008 11:03:53 PM
that is soooo wrong but oh soooo funny!!
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 106
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Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/22/2008 9:46:02 PM
a man goes to the pharmacy and asks the pharmacist for birth control pills for his 11yr old daughter.
The pharmacist is surprised at this - "She's only 11 and she's sexually active?"
the father replies "not really, she usually just lays there like her mother."
 surferrosa
Joined: 1/6/2008
Msg: 107
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Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/23/2008 9:03:59 PM
What's better than winning Gold in the special olympics?

NOT being disabled.
 cazzie1960
Joined: 12/7/2007
Msg: 108
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Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/24/2008 11:14:58 AM
a lady dwarf goes to doctor , my fanny is so sore doctor can u have a look, he has a look an asks nurse for sissors an starts snippin away.. When hes done dwarf says oooooooooooh thats great the pain has gone wot did u do/ doctor says just trimmed top of ur wellies
 cazzie1960
Joined: 12/7/2007
Msg: 109
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Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:25:55 AM
that was just sick not funny at all
 holby
Joined: 9/13/2007
Msg: 110
Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/27/2008 2:12:22 PM
man takes his wife to the doctors im a bit worried about her says the man she aint the same doctor examines her im not sure if your wifes got altzimers or aids says the doctor the man says how will i know drop her off 50miles away if she comes home dont shag her
 surferrosa
Joined: 1/6/2008
Msg: 111
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Warning: Do Not Read Unless You Can Handle Some Pretty Twisted Jokes
Posted: 1/30/2008 6:51:38 PM
What's the worst thing about buying rollerblades?

Having to tell your parents you're gay.
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