| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/18/2007 9:23:23 PM | Oh please, what if the guy is fine as hell, but when he talks he isn't so fine?
C'mon,there is nothing wrong with one night stands, I think many of us have done it sometime in our lives. That dosen't make a woman or a man a whore, dirty or cheap.
It's 2 consenting adults getting pleasure, no more, no less.
And it didn't cost ya 200 bucks on 3 dates,lol. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/18/2007 11:38:59 PM | | This is a crazy question. All you have to do is look at previous threads on this subject and see the guys commenting that when a girl has sex with them on the first date they can't help but wonder how many other guys she has done it with. Or that if she gives it up so easily she is not someone they would consider having a LTR with, or taking home to meet Mum. That is why women don't like to give it up on the first date! The double standard is alive and well. Guys want to have sex as early as possible but don't want to keep the girls who accomodate them. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 1:39:20 AM | I am sorry guys but the blame for this one lies with you. You cant expect women to put out easily or quickly when you openly admit that you wont respect her and label her with derrogatory terms like slut and whore. I mean are you boys special if you want your women to put out quickly you might do better labelling those that do goddesses, vixens and the such like. Wake up to yourselves. If you want definate sex on the first date go see a pro.
( i want to make it clear at this point that i in no way think that the previous proffession is derogatory. More power to you girls.)
RO | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 1:50:42 AM | "Just curious....why do so many women say they dont like a guy who "just wants sex"? Women often comment they want to wait until the 3rd date or longer to have sex. That its got to be meaningful etc... Why is that?"
Part of it is social conditioning. If a young man has sex with many women, he is merely "sowing his wild oats". If a young woman has sex with many men, she is a slut. That is a pretty sad commentary on our society. Our society needs to mature to accept women as truly equal to men.
Part of it is that for some people, sex and love are so tightly connected they are almost inseparable. Some people cannot feel good about having sex unless they are in love with their sexual partner. In my experience, this seems to be more true with women than men. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 2:25:27 AM | | Some of us believe with every fiber in us that sex is some thing you save for that really special person call it love. To give it up so easy what makes it special when mr. or Miss special comes along. And any guy that makes a woman feel like that special person only to have sex with her, has in fact commited emotional date rape. | |
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vosche
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Joined: 1/6/2007
Msg: 306 | |
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 4:45:22 AM | i havent read all the posts in this thread but where i cut in to post i havent seen this posted. if its redundant ignore it.
here it is..and let me first say i'm amazed no one posted it.
the truth is this..
despite what men said in this thread up to where i stopped reading, not one posted this. however, its the old double standard and too many women experience this for them to deny the effect. men want to have their cake and eat it too. they want a slut to play with before they settle for what they thing is some virtuous woman who isnt a slut to build a life with. so we try to be the virtuous woman hoping to edge our bets when looking for a real relationship. women and men both know this. what amazes me is that even after men get this so called virtuous woman, most revert back to wanting the slut to play with again..ie this is where cheating rears its ugly head. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 7:57:43 AM | Who says women find sex on the first date weird...every one has wants and needs...if these two consenting adults want to have sex on the first date who is to tell them they can't...as long as they are ok with it...it's no ones business but theirs...what's the problem here... ...just remember to wear your raincoat...be smart...practice safe sex... | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 9:17:30 AM | Interesting perspective you have there
The most important thing to me is
I need to know the guy is STD- HIV free
I need to know he's not going to want to try on my underwear - biggest nightmare
I don't need an emotional connection from him, I need to feel safe as in is this guy going to turn into a freak.
just for me - growing to a sexual level in the dating game is not a control thing - it's anticipation and during the dating game if you show me any inconsistancies that send a red a flag then not wasting my time even going to a sexual level.
A huge turn on, if you can look me in the eye and talk about sex, your likes and dislikes, fantasies or whether you're disease free if you can't then you're intimacy disabled and I'm not going to enjoy it. See what words you use as your describing sex and where you like to have sex tells me whether I'm moving further with it. Intimacy to me means sharing something of your self even if it's just a sexual side.
I can tell already what you're going to be like in bed by the way you kiss and how you talk, girls you should experience some of the men around the Lloyd area - the guys that work in the Oil and gas industry - They are hot in bed, they know how to get dirty. It's like an attitude they have or something. I like it.
Sex is very important in a relationship and I have to be sexually compatible with a guy before I can get emotionally connected to him from a relationship perspective. So sex is something that should be checked out early enough, have to test the blend. But most importantly I have to know I'm going to be safe from diseases.
I somehow got off topic | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 10:31:33 AM | | I may be the odd man out but when I was young I didn't need a reason to have sex, all I needed was a partner and a place (partner was often optional). I feel fortunate that I have matured and have found that there is more to sex than the race to orgasm. Sex now is no longer something all to itself but is an integral part of the whole relationship. Sex and intimacy are intertwined for me and without intimacy sex is just masturbation with a member of the opposite sex. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 10:44:22 AM | | I think that there's no doubt that women enjoy sex. It's just that most of them aren't willing to sleep with just anybody. They want it to be the right person- that's why they want to have time to get emotionally attached to a guy. The first date is too soon. Men are more indiscriminate when it comes to sex- and they're more visual than emotional. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 10:46:22 AM | Sorry, but the issue is NOT with men.
Most women like to go for "bad boys", and a bad boy, is bad, by definition.
So he IS going to try for sex w/out love, because it can be bad.
He IS going to try and turn it into something nasty.
He IS going to call any woman a bad name, as soon as he gets a reason to.
So he will ALWAYS try for sex on a first date, and will ALWAYS call the woman a bad name to his friends if he does.
Remember the credo: treat them mean to keep them keen.
So that's how he keeps them coming back for more. Them, or their friends.
By deliberately calling women who act like that a bad name, he encourages woman to think that he is a challenge, and they want to prove that they are different, that they can sleep with him, and that he WILL respect them afterwards.
But this is all a ruse. The minute he treats you with respect, he automatically becomes a "nice guy", and you don't want him anymore.
So a "bad boy" can NEVER respect you on a first date.
But a "nice guy" respects the woman BEFORE she sleeps with him, so he will respect her after the first date as well, whether there is sex there or not.
The simple rule is: if he is a "nice guy", and respects you as a person, then sex on a first date is OK, but he is willing to wait.
If he is a "bad boy", and does not respect you as a person, then sex on a first date is NEVER OK, and he is NOT willing to wait. Lol. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 11:08:27 AM | ok. A look in our head. If a woman really likes you and sees something more then a one night stand etc, she is going to baby the situation...exspecially if meeting you has been like a whirlwind. It gives her a chance to establish with you that she sees more in you then just a fling. believe me if you take that extra time and wait...you won't need a profile on this site anymore. If she slept with you on a first date...you are nothing to her and can go to the wayside and she wont look at you except maybe a bootycall. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 11:30:46 AM | | BC, I'm in a mind to believe that sex is not what what women want on a first date, but are ISO it w/ a man who can stimulate them pleasantly for it. In other words, they may not be ready to participate in such activity w/you until they have the opportunity to learn just who's 'bringing it on'. Sex on a first date? It can be quite pleasant, but unless the messages have been sent previously that it'll be one of the mutually-agreed upon activities worthy of exploring together, I'm one man willing to first see and then wait till when she might decide to act on her feelings ...or she's decided that I just don't have what she needs and perhaps lets me for know for why not. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 12:08:45 PM | | There are alot of both men and women who prefer not 2 have sex on a first date, i personaly find it can lead to alot of expectations from either party with regards to a second date. It is much easier 2 tell someone u like them but not in a romantic way after a first date if sex has not taken place. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/19/2007 3:30:39 PM | I look at this question in two ways....I think it depends wether it's a first date or wether it is your first meeting...let me define this, in MY opinion.
Date:
Someone who maybe sent me a note on here, I responded and we arrange to go out. We DON'T email or communicate in any way prior to meeting. So the "date", is just that. We sit down and get to know eachother, see how we feel about getting together a second time and communicating from there. For me in this instance, I would not be interested in sex.
First Meeting:
This is when I have exchanged e-mails with someone, perhaps chatted on a messenger service which then led to talking on the phone. We ARE gettting to know eachother and build some comfort level. There may be a lot of time already invested in getting to know eachother, before meeting the first time. For a variety of reasons this occurs before meeting, work schedules, distance, etc. For me in this instance, if the chemistry is there, it is as comfortable as you felt it would be, the person is who you thought they were, then yes if the situation presented itself, sex would not be an issue for me.
These are my opinions and I respect everyone else's, I just felt like there was a difference between an old fashioned date and what might be going on more these days. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/27/2007 3:18:39 AM | | because the women wants to have the chance of getting comfertable with the guy some women are scared the guy is gonna run off by the aparence of their body or gonna make comments i know im one who will sometimes but verry rare sleep with a guy on the first date if i feel comfertable enough with the situation fine if i dont ill leave it go | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/27/2007 7:17:59 AM | Personally, if a guy wants sex on the first date, it's a virtual guarantee that he doesn't respect me.
A lot of women equate sex with love, and when they give it up on the first date, they get their hearts broken because as it turns out, the guy just wanted a night in the sack and doesn't really care much about her.
Third date is still too soon for me. I want commitment. Sex is a very emotional thing for me, and I don't want to feel like I'm giving a part of myself to some guy I've known for a relatively short time. I've done that before, and it wasn't pleasant when the relationship turned out to be based on sex and the guy didn't respect me at all, in any aspect of our relationship. I don't want that again. I'd prefer the guy I'm seeing to respect the fact that I'm not in the relationship just for what happens between the sheets (or wherever it happens) and is willing to wait until I'm more open to the idea. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/27/2007 7:47:35 AM | I really don't have time today to sit and read through all the posts on here...but I do want to put my two cents in. I have had sex on the first meeting before and it led to a wonderful 6 month relationship- granted we talked on the phone and internet for three months before meeting but still. Would I do it now- if the connection is there and sparks are flying- yes. I would not hesitate. Would I feel bad about it later- no. This is life and you make your choices so if you feel like a slut afterwards, then you have issues that you need to work out. I never do anything I would regret in the morning.
Just my opinion....good luck finding a definitive answer. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/27/2007 2:29:29 PM | | I find I would have to agee with claypot, that mature singles are often beyond the games playing role. An older woman should know whether she wants sex with the man or not and vice versa, so why play the coy game? I would dare say that after several minutes of being with someone you have already formed an opinion in your mind as to whether you want sex with that person or not, its just the problem of being bold enough to express the truth. | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/28/2007 7:26:11 AM | alot of men admit, that women who have sex on first date.. turn them off for a relationship.. that aside.. have to know when u really want someone to sleep with them.. and walking away from a first date to think about that is a good thing.
and i guess if ur going to make those choices its good to do it with self respect... | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/28/2007 7:53:17 AM | we are all adults and if we click and both want sex then why wait , sounds logical to a guy that don't play women one that respects them and wants to have more than sex .. and the problem comes in for women because some women do use sex for leverage and also withold sex for the same reason. so we men get the feeling that is always the case
now the problem for the men is the cad that as soon as he gets the booty he treats the woman like $hit every woman has been treated this way and most many times , but as long as the opinion is out there that some guys have ( i want sex but if a woman gives it to me she is a whore )then we will have to put up with the defense that women have developed .till all Men figure out that IF a woman is a whore for wanting and having sex that makes him one too
.Guys i propose a solution the next time one of your friends is bragging about doing this to a woman walk right up and tell him what a disgraceful whore hound he is and walk away and never have anything to do with him again. do we do this? no we act like its the funniest thing in the world and tell him what a stud he is . hey we are cutting our own throats here .the next time she goes out and wants to have sex with a guy she feels a connection for she will withhold it from you and herself too.guys and girls we want the same things we have just fooled ourselves and let the cads and the real whores ( the ones that withhold sex for leverage) sabotage our relations .
guys condemn this kind of behavior when you hear it , and gals you do the same when you hear a woman brag about having a guy wrapped around their finger by withholding sex , and don't say yall dont talk like that i have many woman friends and i know better.
some of them will have sex on the first date if you can prove you are sincere and none judgmental.,
this is a copy of my post from another thread with a few modifications but it applies here too | |
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| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/29/2007 2:02:34 AM |
If she slept with you on a first date...you are nothing to her and can go to the wayside and she wont look at you except maybe a bootycall.
My personal experience has been completely the opposite. | |
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