| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/7/2007 4:12:48 PM | | Well, there is more of a chance that a meaningful relationship will come out of a relationship that is not built upon just sex. Even if it not really necessary, waiting is more a symbolic gesture saying that there is a connection running between two people that is deeper than physical attraction alone. This is not the case for everyone. Some people have that initial attraction, and having sex the first time is very comfortable for both parties. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/7/2007 4:55:24 PM | | I think people just stereotype all women to fall into that category.I know myself I just go with the moment.I have had sex on first dates before,and I dont think there is anything wrong with it.It all depends on the circumstances and what your looking for... because if all you ever do is have sex and then never talk to each other again,I mean it starts becoming only that,just another random.If thats all you want, thats great.But if your looking for a relationship you dont want to give up all the mystery in one shot.But then again sometimes you want to know what your getting before you chase lol.Because nothing is worse than liking someone alot then finding out there really lame in bed.That may sound shallow but,well I know for me personally sex matters alot,and if theres no chemistry there, there is no point. | |
|
| |
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/4/2008 10:31:48 AM | uh- what if both people decide they want to sleep together on the first date?
One of my best relationships started with sex on the first date....
What's with the bashing? | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/4/2008 11:38:06 AM | | well sometimes it happens that the chemistry is their on the first date after talking for a few months, i dont see it as slutty as long as the one you are with is the only one you are sleeping with. it all depends. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/4/2008 11:40:35 AM | | manx182, so if a woman has sex on the first date she is slutty, but that makes the man a slut to! it takes two to have sex. and if the two people do the deed and it felt right, who knows what can happen! | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/4/2008 12:10:10 PM |
everyone is different, but some women just want sex aswell, people just have to be a bit more honest in what they want........i dont think it matters when you have sex when you meet someone so long as it feels right.....
I agree with you 100%  | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 6/4/2008 1:37:11 PM | | Some of us like myself are not looking for unmeaningful sex. I never just meet someone and have sex. I only have sex with guys I'm in a serious relationship with. I know there are plenty of women and men that want sex on a first date and I don't have a problem with that. I'm just ole fashion in that way. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/19/2008 11:41:31 AM | | most women are concerned about how the man will view her. she's worried what he might think and doesnt want to do anything that might make him think anything negative about her. i'm different because i go with my gut and do whatever i feel. if i want it i do it if i dont, i dont. i never worry what he thinks. it just doesnt really matter to me. i'll get by. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/19/2008 12:23:15 PM | | I don't know that it's women who feel that it's especially weird. For every heterosexual couple who does it, there's one man and one woman. Likewise for every couple that doesn't. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/19/2008 1:40:51 PM | Lots of reasons. some biology, some sociology. think of the way people look at women for casual sex versus the way they look at men. with younger women the risk of pregnancy is also part of it. why would you want to get pregnant by some dude thats going to skip out on you and leave you with the work? pretty simple question really. though not all women feel that way. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/25/2008 4:34:18 PM | | seems like you get it - i don't like the sex on the first date - the other day against my better judgement - i did the sex on the first date and on our 2nd date - our third date didn't happen - i'm guessing because he knows all my secrets now including the fantastic 30 second oral trick i can do - so all of that energy was wasted on someone who didn't care about me - will i do it again? Hell, no. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/25/2008 8:49:47 PM |
OH DEAR ... now I have my curiosity up ... what does a guy do when he's having "meaningless" sex?
Not kiss you and mechanically do the deed. If the girl is hot its ok, but if she's not, then its...well, not. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/25/2008 9:07:33 PM |
Just curious....why do so many women say they dont like a guy who "just wants sex"? Women often comment they want to wait until the 3rd date or longer to have sex. That its got to be meaningful etc... Why is that?
I dunno, everyone is different in that way and have some pretty off the wall reasoning for doing it and not doing it on the first date.
For me personally, if she wanted to have sex on the first date it'd also likely be the last date 'cause TO ME (read: this is MY opinion) she has no class or self respect. I'd prefer to be with someone who respected themselves more than that.
 | |
|
| |
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/25/2008 9:18:59 PM | What ISN'T wrong with sex on the first date, even if there is a connection or whatever, I see it as an easy out, if ya wanna not see her again, bam, you've already had sex, got yours, and can go, while she hurts because she thought you loved her. It's misleading, and wrong, thats why If ya can't make it to the third date, hell, then there shouldn't even be sex, even if there is an attraction, its probably not because you love them, ya just wanna get laid. Gaaaaarrrrrrhhhhhh, some guys make me embarrassed to be a man. Did empathy get tossed out the window while you were having sex with her or did you just not have it to begin with?
jeez | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/25/2008 11:20:12 PM | | This happened to me after meeting someone online and talking for 2-3 months. The chemistry was there from the beginning and when we finally met up (after he got back from being overseas for work) we ended up having sex on the first date. But now I'm worried that perhaps its set the tone of the relationship and indicated to him I may just sleep around easily as we've never talked about what we are looking for. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/26/2008 9:03:29 AM |
What ISN'T wrong with sex on the first date, even if there is a connection or whatever, I see it as an easy out, if ya wanna not see her again, bam, you've already had sex, got yours, and can go, while she hurts because she thought you loved her They would have to be crazy or naive to think that the other person loves them after the FIRST date.
What I find sad is that people think either the girl or the guy is getting used somehow, when they have casual sex. Maybe, just maybe, they are doing it because they both want to?? :) It's so-called "men" like "Lieutenant Rossi" that make me ashamed of my gender some days.
Chicks don't put out on the first date, because if it was that easy to get it there would be more guys who didn't call back. Most girls have nothing else of worth to offer, so they have to hold the sex over a guys head to get him to stick around. That's all there is to it. I hate to agree with that statement, but in my experience, it has proven to be accurate. The only ones who hold back are the ones who want some form of control (or want to make the guy stick around because they have nothing else with which to attract someone). | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/26/2008 2:51:16 PM | | So your justifying that it is okay to have meaningless, sex, that is just how I see it and you personally make me embaressed to be a guy because of that alone, and ever think that maybe they aren't naive or an idiot but they OBVIOUSLY think sex is a bonding and they are doing it because they think they might actually love them, of course you didn't, because your probably the type of guy who picks up chicks, has sex on the first date, and leaves em if it isn't great. Sex on a first date and leaving is using someone, leaving for a GOOD reason isn't. | |
|
udgirl
|
Joined: 7/19/2008
Msg: 420 | |
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/26/2008 5:55:52 PM | | I've had sex on the first date before and I didn't think there was anything wrong with it. We were both attracted to each other, started fooling around and it happened. We ended up dating for a few months after that. BUT, I've also fooled around a lot on a first date and had it blow up in my face! One guy ended up telling me that he thought things went too fast/out of control and he thought the girl he needed to date wouldn't do that on a first date. If that isn't the pot calling the kettle black lol. | |
|
Dawn 2
|
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 421 | |
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/26/2008 6:49:20 PM | Sex on the 1st date, or sex on the 3rd date either way you are adhering to social norms and rules, and you are defining yourself by those social rules if you conceptualize yourself as "weird", or a "slut". People should be free to create connections with other people they meet, feel good about it, and create some passion. To much of life is structured by what we should or shouldn't do. And at what point was sex and emotions defined as separate things. Everything involves emotions, if you weren't having emotions when you were having sex you wouldn't feel anything. So many relationships are failing because women tie their emotional feelings with sex and it destroys their ability to create intimacy with their partner. There are no emotional relationships or sex only relationships there are just relationships, or at least it would be nice if that were actually the case. We need to get passed the "madonna/whore" social constraint and create some passion.  | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/26/2008 7:22:40 PM | I don't know if women find sex "weird" on a first date. But what I find weird is that men seem to expect it, or use the whole "you're trying to control me by not giving in" routine.
I actually had a man tell me that we would have sex on the first meet, because there was no better way to get to know someone than to have sex with them. Ummm, I don't think so. But he wasn't going to "waste his time on someone who wasn't going to put out." I wonder how that's working for him??
I know a few people for whom sex on the first date has turned into a good relationship, but I would think they are few and far between.
If I choose to wait until sex feels right for me in the relationship, I am in no way trying to control the man by withholding. If he doesn't think I am worth waiting for, then he's probably not the man for me. If he DOES think I'm worth waiting for, I probably won't make him wait too long. Deciding when to become intimate is a personal decision between the two people involved. There is no right or wrong answer as to when. What is right for one couple is not the same as for another couple. But it should be a mutual decision, one shouldn't be pressured into it.
And Dawn, I hate to disagree with you, but many people, especially men, are quite capable of having sex without emotion.
I could probably go on and on about this, but most points have already been made. My belief is to just do what's right for you and don't let anyone else tell you that it's weird or you are not normal or whatever. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/26/2008 8:27:42 PM | | Depends how many people you are getting to know, how muchyou like them before the date and if u connect well or not and if u see a future in it and how cautious about sex he is. | |
|
Dawn 2
|
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 424 | |
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 8/26/2008 9:40:33 PM | | Grapevine you said what I couldn't articulate as well and would agree that it does seem weird that an intimate bond such as sex does not naturally progress to something more meaningful. However, it is kind of too bad that things have to be so either or, and you can't have closeness and intimacy and remain independent and without an all encompassing relationship. | |
|
| Why do women find sex on a first date so weird?
Posted: 9/16/2008 11:20:39 AM | There is such an obvious answer to this question:
'cause if you do not like me enough to go out with me at least three times,
i do not want to have sex with you. i can have meaningless sex with any one of my glorious magnificent vibrators. the whole reason i am in the dating world is cause i want more than that. (geez) (lol) | |
|
Home
login 
