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| Do you think your little things tolerance has decreased or increased with age?
Posted: 11/7/2006 2:12:31 PM | My tolerance has decreased and increased with age depending on what the issue is.
Increased tolerance as I longer let small things in life get to me. However, decreased regard to what I will tolerate from others. I live in a drama free zone, and expect every one to be responsible for themselves. | |
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| Do you think your little things tolerance has decreased or increased with age?
Posted: 11/7/2006 3:34:08 PM | I agree that my little things tolerance has shifted with age according to the issue. In some matters more tolerant, in others, less.
However, when my level of tolerance is exceeded for an issue the vehemence of my reaction is measureably greater than before. Although it is still on a par with the irritation. In other words the level of the reaction is the same but since the trigger point is higher so is the reaction.
What has shortened is the duration of the reaction. It is much easier to get over things... why waste the energy. | |
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| Do you think your little things tolerance has decreased or increased with age?
Posted: 11/8/2006 3:41:54 PM | | My tolerance for the little things has definately increased. People making me wait a bit longer for them than I intended to be waiting, going to a restaurant with a friend who always forgets to bring enough money with her, listening to people go on and on about their day long after my interest has disapeared! I can tolerate it all and almost always with grace. What I find has decreased is my tolerance for the big things - dishonesty, even if the dishonesty is only with the person themself. | |
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| Do you think your little things tolerance has decreased or increased with age?
Posted: 11/8/2006 3:51:10 PM | Yes, I agree.. I don't sweat the small stuff, but I can no longer tolerate 50's music! Funny it never bothered me before, I was always able to tune it out and hum my own song of choice in my head. Now it makes me want to jump out of the car! And elevator music that mutilates well known songs, picture John Lennon singing "Imagine" now make it elevator worthy!
Can't tolerate the drive thru teller calling me by my first name.. You take my money, you are not my friend! Rudeness at any age.. People who say "you know" "like" "whatever" The english language is butchered on a daily basis.. Oh it hurts my ears
Drama free zone is exactly what I want, and require.. I'm agreeing with moraima on that | |
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| Do you think your little things tolerance has decreased or increased with age?
Posted: 9/23/2009 7:19:50 PM |
Do you think your little things tolerance has decreased or increased with age?
Message: My tolerance for most things has increased as I've gotten older. I finally learned to not "sweat the petty stuff
My tolerance for little things has definitely INCREASED with age. Things that I might have gotten upset by when much younger, just roll off my back. I have learned it is easier to be happy if you are not so petty.
I have learned to accept my love interest exactly where he is without any intention of changing him. Likewise I hope he will extend to me the same courtesy. If we can not accept each other as we are there is no point in trying to have a relationship. By the time you reach middle age you are who you are. Change will only come about if it comes from within. You have to see that what you get from making subtle changes in your life, is worth what you are getting by making those changes.
For example, my boyfriend and I both are custodial parents. We agree that the kids have to be first priority. I have chosen to accept being number two (at least until the children are independent adults and have flow the coop.) I have accepted that since we both have parenting responsibilities that I will not get to see him as often as I might like (for now). I accept that when it comes time to plan time together, the plans are made after his plans with his son have been made, and then we see how we can make out plans. I accept that sometimes this means I don't know that I will see him until the same day as we get together. For me, having this particular man in my life is worth accepting these things. When I was younger I would not tolerate being number two, would not tolerate limited time together, would not tolerate making dates at the last minute. At this point in my life, this man is a really good fit for me mentally, emotionally, physically, and it is worth accepting these realities to have him in my life.
He is a man who has not been in a relationship for over a decade whose contacts with women have been casual and sparse. He has filled his time up with fathering a son and doing "man" things. He has had to find a place for me in his already filled up life. He has made some changes. He finds time to call me every day. He makes and effort to block out 15 or 20 hours to spend with me on the weekend. He has allowed someone
other than his son to be an important part of his life. He has allowed his heart to be open and taken a risk after being alone for 12 years.
He has made some changes, and I have made some changes. I did not force him to do these things. He did not force me to accept these things. We freely chose to make these changes in our lifestyles because there was something worthwhile in it for us, each other.
If he is late for a date, the change he has made in his life, is as soon as he realizes he is going to be late he calls, so I am not sitting around waiting and wondering. He stays in touch with me. I know as a parent things happen with your kids that can make you have to change plans at the last minute. He keeps in touch, and I don't get b1tchy when he is two hours late. If I made dinner for us, and dinner is ruined, then I guess he would get to take me out to dinner, or praise me for overcooked chicken (lol).
I choose to not argue with him over late arrivals or missed phone calls. I have learned that things happen. He is not deliberately being inconsiderate, he just has distractions.
By not sweating these things , when he walks in the door, he is always smiling and happy to see me. I am always smiling and happy to see him too. We don't waste a minute of our time together bickering which makes all the time we have together positive and upbeat. I am a much happier person accepting things the way they are, and the limitations we face being single parents. It has almost been 8 months since our first date. This has been without a doubt the best, least stressful relationship I have had in my life. Attitude, and not sweating the small stuff makes all the difference.
If something is less than desireable, calmly sharing feelings without blame diffuses the situation, and is well received and those behaviors are modified if need be.
There is only one thing I would not tolerate, and that is dishonesty. This would include unfaithfulness. The relationship has to have a foundation of honesty and trust. | |
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| Do you think your little things tolerance has decreased or increased with age?
Posted: 9/23/2009 10:08:05 PM | | It is my impression that my tolerance level for most things is pretty much the same as ever, except maybe that it was not until late in my 40's that I began teaching teenagers, before that I taught adults. My tolerance for many things has necessarily decreased in response to my daily environment, and I tolerate a lot of the 'small stuff' that seem to irritate the heck out of other mid-life people. One of the things that really irritates the heck out of me, and has done so since I was a teenager, is females who go on an on about 'my boyfriend' this and 'my boyfriend' that. It is as if they have no life or reality outside being connected to some man. It is so tiresome and annoying to listen to a woman go on and on about her boyfriend or husband. I've never done that, the women I have been close to never do that. And we all have been in or are in long term relationship. So before anyone jumps the gun here, this is not about jealousy. It is about making the 'relationship' or the man in your life the center of your existence and self worth. Drives me f**king nuts when females do it. I just want to scream, 'get a life.' | |
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| Do you think your little things tolerance has decreased or increased with age?
Posted: 9/24/2009 5:12:29 AM | Whoa, I am feeling chastised with all the comments about knuckle cracking. I do that. So noted!
In the meantime, when I was younger I had very few boundaries and tolerated too much in the name of love. Now, I know that there are somethings that are not okay no matter what, some things that are not okay for me, and some things that are just annoying. The first two on that list get someone the heave ho, but the annoying stuff .... it depends on what it is.
The things that are annoying to me are things like verbal tics, lying, lack of confidence, lying, predjudice, lying, arrogance, lying ... and did I mention lying? | |
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