| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 3/21/2005 8:40:25 PM | I don't think you should lie. However, just like in the real world, you wouldn't tell "your date" how much you make, why would you here? Personally, I've found that when I put up what I do for a living, others think I make a tremendous amount. I don't think it's anyone's business either way, unless I'm becoming intimate with the person and we're thinking about moving in with one another. Of course, that's just my opinion.
angel | |
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medana
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Joined: 3/15/2005
Msg: 53 | |
| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 3/21/2005 9:06:44 PM | i would say don't mention anything, rather than lie... i dated a guy one time that had a profile that said over 150K... i knew the day i met him he wasnt... i did like him though, and we did have a short thing, but always in the back of my mind was the fact he lied... and i knew it... i didn't want to hurt his feelings and plain out ask him, i didn't want to sound like i would care about it either... i mean he was very sweet, always paid for dinner, even brought me lunch to work...
but why did he lie, i though? and what else might he have lied about? eventually i just asked him, it seemed so out of his personality... so he said it was because he had made that much the year before etc etc...
he still has a profile up that says the same thing....
i would say lying gives clear messages about ur level of integrity... i don't care if u r 500$ under, don't say anything rather than lie... so many lie about their looks, age and heing, it amazes me... then income also... it's like this is a game of what we want to be and not who we are...
be urself | |
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medana
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Joined: 3/15/2005
Msg: 54 | |
| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 3/21/2005 9:07:37 PM |
yea, well, i make about 60k a year but you dont see me showing that off.
i see, and this post was a total non show off, ure right.,..lol | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 3/21/2005 9:10:05 PM | I agree; yer showing off dude.
(I think that income should not even BE a category)
THAT is how "marks" are made.
I wouldn't even mention it. | |
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medana
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Joined: 3/15/2005
Msg: 56 | |
| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 3/21/2005 9:13:59 PM |
Seriously though, that shouldn't be a determining factor for dating if you really like the person...
i disagree... i spent ten years in relationships where i was the one making money, and supporting our lifestyle... i didnt mind, i was going to college and working at the same time, and had more money than most of the people my age i knew back then... my partners were still in college, so i didnt mind sharing at all...
but i had enough of that, and since i moved here it's been hard to adjust and am still struggling, i definitely do not want to be with someone to drag me lower than i already am. and am done with being the one spoiling others... not that i'd have much to spoil them with right now, but been there, done that, it was sweeet, get me out of that...lolol
nay nay nay
not any more of that | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 3/24/2005 9:52:07 AM | | It is sad but most do you are right madana,not me,if they don't like what they here,there lost! | |
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silken
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Joined: 3/12/2005
Msg: 58 | |
| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 3/24/2005 12:01:52 PM |
I'm completely honest in my profile - weight, height, age, marital status, and so on. I'm also honest about income. However, when women see "$35K to $49K" in my profile, they're probably thinking "this guy makes $35K."
I wish women wouldn't consider a man's income, but they ALL have it in their preferences, even if they don't show their own income.
I'm sorry but what on earth are you thinking? :) You actually want to attract a woman who is going to accept you based on whether you make $35,000 or $50,000? Dear any woman who is going to discriminate on that basis is one that you should be walking AWAY from!
If I was a guy, I would not even give the time of day to a woman who questioned me about my income in the beginning. It's one thing to have a discussion once you are in a relationship and talking about finances, etc., but until then, it's not her business. I would not even list anything on your profile for income because you are most likely going to draw a lot of women who are interested in money....
And you are wrong about all women putting it in their preferences, I certainly don't!
silken | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/6/2005 9:24:40 PM | | that's one thing i never look at... i mean, who cares if you're bill gates or if you're on welfare as long as you two hit it off? if you hook up later on, and end up getting married, then it becomes a topic you can bring up. before then, it's not an issue. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/7/2005 12:54:06 AM | well if you want a serious and meaning full relationship with a particular person you should deffinately NOT lie about your income.You could never really have a proper relationship with that 'special' someone if u have or are lying to them. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/10/2005 1:43:58 PM | | What I really don't get is why do you have to "lie" about anything? Income is a personal matter, not like height or weight or hair color, which are evident when you meet someone. How do you feel when you meet someone in person who has been deceitful or just plain outright lied about something? A question that starts should I lie about....whatever it is....is just a bad question and makes me wonder if people are just used to lying in general as a way to handle situations. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/10/2005 1:48:20 PM | Just an FYI, it's nobody's damned business how much I make!! I think that a personal ad site should completely abolish income as an option..or of course the "prefer not to say" option.
There's no way of her of really finding out, unless you start taking her to the Olive Garden and Red Lobsters for dinner, instead of that fine 5 star restaurant where you only pay for atmosphere. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/10/2005 2:04:13 PM | I prefer sites that don't advertise incomes. Why?
Because some people will exaggerate (LIE) about their incomes and inflate it,
so it's already a misrepresentation right from the beginning.
And some people will type in their income specifically to impress others.
And I don't want to compete for space with a date AND his Ego. *laugh*
Other people will deliberately downplay (LIE) about their income in order to attempt to weed out the gold-diggers.
Again a misrepresentation. So many bad novels are made of that notion. The confident but poor, hardworking gorgeous hunk/babe who turns out to be a multi-millionaire. Blech.)
(Though of course, to someone with NO money, ANY money will sound good *smirk*)
And some people, in disgust for the question, will just totally disregard it, and type in a ridiculous number that has no basis on reality.
Such as typing that you are 2 feet tall and 126 years old on your profile.
So ultimately, the income question doesn't count for much.
Given the option, I always type in Prefer Not to Say.
No one's business until they get to know me as a friend. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/10/2005 2:22:56 PM | elmwood
This is a very interesting thread. Let me take it in another direction-I just started a new job, I took a $6K pay cut in order to stay in an area of sales I enjoy. Most web sites include income and I find I get very little attention when I list my salary at $30K. Lieing about it would only jeopardize any chance of begining an open communication. God bless you that you have this choice, I would be completely honest about it but remain cautious about intent. | |
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~Ames~
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Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 65 | |
| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/10/2005 2:36:07 PM | I say post nothing. I don't reveal my profession and I sure as heck don't reveal my income. I mean c'mon, why does it really matter anyway? It shouldn't atleast not in the beginning of meeting someone. If someone has the nerve to ask me that my response is simple...."why? Are you thinking of taking over my bills??" That will shut them up. If you are worried about the women not liking you because you don't make a certain amount of money I just have one question for you. Why on earth would you even consider someone that is so focused on money or material things? Seems to me they may have ulterior motives. Besides that, I find it extremely unattractive when a guy posts how much money he makes, or poses for pictures by his pricey vehicle or boat....maybe I am weird. I just see the two words "high maintence", that makes me run.....and run fast at that.
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/10/2005 2:38:54 PM | | I have no earned income at all, and it really has lead to some awkward situations with women since often they keep pushing to found out what I do or do not have. At one point it used to annoy me, but that I began to think that just like most guys don't want a gold-digger, women are probably being protective that us men are not being gold-diggers too. This doesn't mean you have to be a squillionaire, just have enough to support at least yourself in the lifestyle they would hope to have if you were dating. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/10/2005 5:01:20 PM | I agree with Sliv, from his earlier post that women just want to know that a person can deal with "routine, discipline and general functionality as a member of society".
I think men would think the same way?
I was chatting with one of my gf's the other day, and both of us came to the same conclusion. The topic of work almost never comes up in conversations when we are with men, beyond the fact that, yes, they DO have a job.
Beyond that?
Well... who REALLY wants to unwind and have a fun time talking about work??? *laugh*
So many other more stimulating topics to cover..... | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/10/2005 7:41:47 PM | | There is no way that I could tell you what I make (or lack there of) and you not think that I am a spoiled brat. So I would rather not discuss it until later on once you get to know me. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/11/2005 2:00:50 AM | I didn't read all of the other responses, but I'd say don't enter an income level at all.
If a woman is that concerned about your income, is that really someone you want to be with?
It shouldn't matter.
I prefer not to know how much money a guy has or makes, if and until we're getting ready to start splitting the bills... at that point he should be able to cover half. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/11/2005 3:04:29 AM | | awww honey, who care how much you make., money cant buy love right? so if a woman cant realize that, buh bye lady. move on. lets you weed out the gold diggin hoes. lol | |
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cazar
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Joined: 4/28/2005
Msg: 71 | |
| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/11/2005 3:05:57 AM | why should you lie? doesnt help any kind of understanding or relationship later on..
money shouldnt matter but sometimes It does
to those who have never had any real funds...yes money is a help and a hindrance
to those who are born into cash ..same as above...and it matters somewhat to them
self made people dont want to lose it...or dont like to flaunt it ..or like to flaunt it
look at super rich people..u will see the flaunters and the people who dont act like that they got money at all ..
never ever lie about your income...I surely am not going to say what I make but it tis quite a bit more than I was at one time used to ...but my quality of life hasnt gone up....I remember what it was like to be broke...
problem is on the net..and in the (other side ) as I call it...too many fakery and all of that.. | |
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quoin
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Joined: 5/22/2005
Msg: 72 | |
| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/11/2005 12:30:20 PM | nahhh, don't lie...just don't tell 'em...makes for more mystery..keeps 'em intrigued awhile longer....they'll figure it out quick enuf, though :)
So have fun while you can | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/11/2005 9:58:38 PM | | Really dude, you don't need to get responses from women that are reading profiles checking out how much you make. If money's all chicks are after, then here's a fifty, they can suck a**** | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/11/2005 10:20:32 PM | I don't believe you guys and girls for a second----this thread is about as funny as everybodies profile saying they don't do any drugs (is that perscription or illegal drugs anyway)------bull crap!!---LOL---You all know darn well if you meet somebody you like, and he or she has money--you look at it as a plus (and it can be)---who are you people trying to kid here?
heck, us single people get raped by taxes every pay check, and we pay for our homes and bills all by ourself---what do you have left?--enough just to keep working. Half the reason we look for a spouse is to help get ahead. | |
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| Should I lie about my income?
Posted: 6/11/2005 11:02:45 PM | Hi Im from Australia, and I have always found this income telling expectation rather strange and slightly cold. Is this an american only thing? I have some USA buddies and they found it strange when they came here no one asked them what they earned etc [ when out chatting to females or vice versa] Its kinda rude question here....its private and personal until you are in an established relationship. I would never ask anyone what they earned....Its understandable to pick a future mate of some business level or intelligent level that would suit you,but here generally asking what do you do for a living....is nuff said at that point. If a girl asked a guy what he earned here, he'd probably say something not printable and walk away
Im not criticising..Im just fascinated by the difference in cultures...whatever works...I was just curious...doesnt this feel like just another added pressure to an already difficult scenario of getting to know someone for them...not what they can do for you???? | |
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