| | unemployedPage 4 of 13 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13) | The funny thing about this as well, the voluntary work I do is writing CV's & helping people apply for jobs. Which is wholly gratifying! So the quality of my CV and apps is quite , if I say so myself, good too.
But the whole pressure of my personal situation and the pressures of society as a whole, does not paint a pretty picture for most of us more senior persons, I agree!
Very much so! | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 6:05:22 AM | | .. of course, there are jobs out there, I think it depends what you want to do. Personally I'd rather be serving burgers in McDonalds or sweeping floors to sitting at home doing nothing while I looked for my "ideal job". I think work is work, and keeping in the work place environment is great for self esteem and looks good on your CV to show you are keen to consider all options, like a "jack of all trades". | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 6:23:27 AM | Stupid question, but how does the average person actually remain unemployed on any kind of perminant basis like this thread assumes of someone?
Most (single) people aren't wealthy which means if you don't work you claim benefits, and from what I understand you have to claim for an actual reason, like a legitimate illness, or taking care of an infant or someone disabled, or you temporarily claim JSA while actively looking for work.
Are some people here actually suggesting being unemployed is a lifestyle choice funded by the benefit system, and not a matter of necessity like the reasons above? Or is this thread essentially discussing whether or not you would date someone disabled, or a single mother, or someone just briefly out of work / between jobs (some already discussed topics).
I find it a little worrying how casual people consider unemployment, like it's a choice you wake up one morning and make. Most people NEED to work, no? | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 7:36:02 AM | getting a job these days is a bit like winning x factor. there seems to be a popular choice trend that everyone follows. if you're not in the popular group you've little chance. a scouser or a yorkie getting a job in the south has less chance just because of their accent. as a southerner in some parts of scotland or wales is i've no doubt just as out of luck.
but to get back on topic, which i think was would you date someone that was unemployed. whats their work status got to do with who they are? it would make no difference to me, anymore than if they chose to wear jeans n a tee or a dress. if they had to be employed the next question would logically be do they have an acceptable job? do they work acceptable hours? what else do i want em to change to suit me? i don't think there's anything so damn special about me, in spite of what the doctors told me mother all them years ago :-) | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 8:07:07 AM | I would have no problem dating someone who was unemployed.
In the present economic climate any one of us could be the next to be making our way to the local jobcentre plus with a heavy heart clutching our p45, so I would have thought a bit of consideration and humanity would be the order of the day.
Not everyone signing on is a professional scrounger. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 8:43:50 AM | | i wont date long term unemplyoyed cos i dont think theres a reason to be unemployed so long, i hve no time for these people who say theres no jobs cos there is if people look properly, ive been looking for two weeks cos for 8 weeks ive been on the sick due to having a major operation , but in two weeks ive been looking ihave had 4 interviews and got a job trial on monday, lazy dole dossers i hate em | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 8:50:04 AM | I have a friend who is 54 and long term unemployed, ( 2 years) she is anything but lazy.
Due to the glut of people now looking for work thanks to the faceless multi-nationals who own 87% of the world banks the choice for employers has never been so great, unfortunately for my friend she has found that a wealth of experience counts for nothing these days as most prospective employers are opting to go for younger employees with less knowledge as they can get away with paying them buttons. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 9:19:14 AM | Business Proprietor" god you should hear the stories he could tell over a pint about girls who contacted him. He drove a Mercedes too which only added to the jaunt, if he picked them up for a date
A very good friend of mine owns about 40 HMO's (houses of multiple occupation) and is disgustingly minted. He has two maintenance guys working for him full time, he tells women online that for a living he's one of these maintenance guys and turns up for dates in a van, the Porsche Cayenne stays at home.
He didn't get where he is today by being careless
Most genuinely well off people i know don't brag or have any wish to draw unwanted attention to it. People who do are usually not well off, they have the appearance of being so but it's all owned by the bank. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 9:25:40 AM | it's long been established that a shortage of labour raises wages where an over supply forces them down, so no prizes for guessing the reasons for the immigration policies then! the introduction of the minimum wage was seen as the going rate for the job rather than the lowest wage. if there's jobs you cant farm out to countries with spare labour the solution was simple, import the spare labour. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/2/2011 9:47:41 AM |
unfortunately for my friend she has found that a wealth of experience counts for nothing these days as most prospective employers are opting to go for younger employees with less knowledge as they can get away with paying them buttons.
I think I had pretty much said this, so it is good I hear somebody else say it!!
i hve no time for these people who say theres no jobs cos there is if people look properly, ive been looking for two weeks cos for 8 weeks ive been on the sick due to having a major operation , but in two weeks ive been looking ihave had 4 interviews and got a job trial on monday, lazy dole dossers i hate em
Maybe so in the West Yorkshire region and I wish you luck. But unfortunately the other side of your County (as your name states), the East Riding, is not blessed with the jobs that you claim are readily available where you live! I myself have and still will apply for any job that gives me a living wage, including flipping burgers (unfortunately due to cuts, the MacD's is closing down here, so that is that opportunity out of the window) but the simple fact now is in this poor old seaside resort town, has long established businesses and company's are closing down on a weekly basis.
In the professionalism of my re-recruitment, which in effect is now my job, I sought follow-up feedback to an application from a HR Manager. She was very non-commital at first, but when pushed she gave me the real reason I was unsuccessful (off the record btw)
When the advertised position was filled previously in 2005, there were only 7 applicants and they interviewed all of them! When advertised in May this year the applicant count was 249, of which 57 recieved 100% (yes i was one) on a scoring rating they put in to assess the suitable. Of this amount they could only lend the time to interview 14, of the 14, 3 were internal applicants of which 1 was very likely to get the position anyway (Of course) as a matter of promotion within. Due to them being a local government organisation, they HAD to invite applicants by law. Just an absolute perfect example of what honest good people are having to put up with in their search for employment!  | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/3/2011 12:25:23 PM | | Maybe you need to reconsider your options OP. I wonder what kind of jobs you are actually applying for? Have you considered diversifying, you know changing direction? Perhaps you consider being self-employed - what are your strengths, what can you pull out and use from your personal life to enhance your chances of success in the employment market place? | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/3/2011 1:46:28 PM | | A slight tangent; but might it be similar to unemployed or in fact unemployed preferable to say a sanitary engineer in allure to the opposite gender. Can you imagine long term your other half coming home from cleaning the local sewers out? | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/3/2011 3:20:04 PM | | No wouldn't date someone unemployed... on a practical level it just wouldn't work and in terms of a relationship I'd prefer a man who was my equal or better | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/3/2011 3:30:59 PM | | Ive spent more time unemployed than working. Ive been told im a very hard worker when i can work. But i cant keep a job more than a few months cause my health fails every time. I was self employed for 3 yrs and had a Gf i loved. But when i was unable to work for a few months i got depressed cause i couldnt support her and her kids. Im on incapacity now and have been for 6 yrs. I cant work more than half an hr a day due to health problems. Im bored sat around with nothing to do. I cant go out to make friends or find a GF. Even if i did meet someone i like i wouldnt be able to handle it cause i would feel bad cause i couldnt afford to take them out or buy them nice things and get depressed again. I would love to have a gf to love and care for and someone to love me. But i cant handle not being able to pay my way. Even staying home while she works wont help as i cant even do the housework to help out. I would feel like a burden on her. I had 1 relationship while i was sick for 10 yrs. She worked 3 jobs to support me and i hated it. I was able to do the housework and all the cooking then so it helped a bit. But i was so depressed cause i had to rely on her to pay all the bills. I have agraphobia, socialphobia, Spine problems, Kidney problems and depression. 1 lung doesnt work properly. Cant stay standing for more than 1 hr and cant sit for more than 20 mins. How many girls would be able to handle that. Never being able to go out to pubs or clubs as a couple. It wouldnt be fair on her. Money isnt to much of a problem as i get incapacity and DLA. Its getting around thats the problem. But ive seen ppl who refuse to work and it annoyes me. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/3/2011 4:05:26 PM | | No i would not date someone who was unemployed. I work hard for a living and i did that all the while bringing up my kids. And now im reaping the benefits from all that hard work. I know people cannot help being made redundant etc etc that is different, but even so there is jobs out there, you just have to keep looking. but long term dole spongers !!! not a chance. | |
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cc7up
| | Joined: 8/18/2011 Msg: 91 | |
| unemployed Posted: 9/3/2011 6:38:54 PM | There are blokes who would be ok being with someone who earned more than he did or being a 'kept' man.
I am not one of them.
I would not support anyone finacially long term either. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 3:39:24 AM | @msg 86
Maybe you need to reconsider your options OP. I wonder what kind of jobs you are actually applying for? Have you considered diversifying, you know changing direction? Perhaps you consider being self-employed - what are your strengths, what can you pull out and use from your personal life to enhance your chances of success in the employment market place?
Valid points and very thought inducing!
Most of these options have been and do get considered on a daily basis. I have constant contact with recruitment, voluntary, employment and job services every day. Location is a big point, but because of family issues (I have a 7yo son in the area) I would be reluctant to dissappear from the area I live.
There are many things though now, that I could list and believe are occuring in my re-recruitment drive that do not have any effect. But I have a tremendous amount of positive attributes, plus qualifications, that would make me a great employee too! I tend to find when I recieve "any" feedback that a lot of the companys are reluctant to "upset their applecart" I have an infectious personality, I've been told, which makes me perfect for self-employment. But due to realistic financial constraints is a non-runner, I'm afraid. This avenue has been already sought and dismissed!
This is not an overnight situation it is dealt with logic and total professionalism, with the best support available. Others may say I am trying too hard, or I am not going about this in the right way? But in my field I was good and just seem to feel I am being punished by others, for no reason!
I have involved self advertisement, networking myself, hand-to-hand distribution of CV's. and involvement of even my local MP, all to no avail. I believe that there are more sinister reasons now, for my increasing failure. It is a constant battle to succeed and find answers! Plus the overpowering lack of dents in self confidence this is causing at times!
I think it purely and simply is my demeanour that is putting employers off! I look fantastic on paper, and I am, but when they interview me it is almost as if they are frightened of me?  | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 4:23:35 AM | Someone mentioned that the OP maybe try the "Self Employement" path, well to be honest being self employed is like being unemployed sometimes, you have no one else to rely on for a wage if there is no work there is no money. It is quite surprising that some people think that when you are self employed you are rolling in it, dont get me wrong when the money comes in it is good money, but for example because of the nature of my own self employement I can go for months struggling, however have a confortable lifestyle when I have the work coming in.
It is hard out there at the moment, I have a pal who has been unemployed for over twelve months now but applies for employement constantly, he uses my stationary / equiptment to do so but just cant seem to get any work.
So yes I would date a person who was unemployed, however I would expect them to be actively looking for work. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 4:29:26 AM | | I wonder how many amongst us who say we would never date some one unemployed, would change their tune, if they should find themselves unfortunately with out employment? Should those in a relationship or dating be immediately dumped as soon as they receive their P45? | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 4:35:16 AM | | In response to msg 94 ^^^^^ I probably wouldn't date if I became unemployed as wouldn't be able to afford it, dating is a luxury that would go on hold as far as my list of priorities go | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 4:47:27 AM | I probabley wouldn't date someone who had been unemployed long term no. Not because I think it makes them a bad person, boogerman or whatever. Simply because dating isn't always free, and neither is some of the travel potentially associated with it. Even if on benefits or whatnot, that money should be used to be feeding and clothing yourself and trying to get work. Adding dating expenditures to it won't really help, and I don't want a large impetus of potential cost of that on my head, it should always be shared initially. I wouldn't care at all if I were looking for something casual in nature. Seeing as i'm getting to that point where I'm moving into the "more of a settling down mindset" it is something I think about when looking for a relationship. It's not the same as asking for a megabux job or whatnot, but more the fact of earning some money and the responsibility that comes with that level of self management.
If I were unemployed myself I would not be looking for dates full stop, for the same reasons above. I will not realistically have the money to be dating properly without depriving myself of something else, plus I should be more focused on finding work. Fortunatley i've never been out of work long enough for that ever to be an issue. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 4:54:14 AM |
I probably wouldn't date if I became unemployed as wouldn't be able to afford it, dating is a luxury that would go on hold as far as my list of priorities go
This is exactly my dillemna, I have been juggling with this all week now
The girl I've been recently chatting to says it is no problem and in fact my honesty has endeared me more to her! But something is nagging me? | |
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Pud78
| | Joined: 4/29/2010 Msg: 98 | |
| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 6:15:41 AM |
But something is nagging me? If she is nagging already mate your in trouble. lol. If you like her and she knows the situation and that money is going to be tight but by being honest you have endeared yourself to her I would ignore the nagging doubts about money and whether you should put dating on hold as it clealry isn't a problem for her.
Like attracts like, I am hard working, don't expect to be given anything and have the value of money from a strong work ethic instilled in me by my parents, I want a partner who has the same ethos. She doesn't have to be working at that time or even looking but her attitude towards work is probably the most important thing. | |
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cc7up
| | Joined: 8/18/2011 Msg: 99 | |
| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 6:17:16 AM | But something is nagging me?
It is probably the same Male pride that is hard wired into most bloke's 'Provider' dna. | |
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| unemployed Posted: 9/4/2011 6:57:35 AM | | I would yes, but not if he is unemployed as a choice lifestyle rather than wanting and actively seeking work. Hopefully he is using the spare time he has during the day to do something constructive (updating his skills, doing some volunteer work, studying) rather than just sending out endless CVs that probably will just be binned at the other end. | |
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