| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/10/2005 6:46:10 PM | Could we remove the word "player" from this title all together. There has been no posts that reflect the tentancies of a player on this thread.
This is exclusively about stalkers and creeps. Interesting and useful though, just the wrong title. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/10/2005 6:48:02 PM | >>It's never hapened to me,but it has happened to a couple of people on here. Usually they >>simply create a new profile. I would also sugest a different photo, just to further confuse >>them - they aren't too intelligent, so it doesn't take much ;-)
I agree, people often get confused on here.
I keep getting the same e-mail from the same person "Wow, I read your profile and we seem to have a lot in common. You seem like just the person I'm looking for." which is obviously a "line" they use because they can't remember having e-mailed me three times with the same e-mail already. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/10/2005 7:15:47 PM | I still say the best way to handle this situation is to have a group get-together. (not with teh stalker!) That should avoid the whole stalking thing in the first place. There is nothing like face-to-face contact to weed out the wackos from the genuine people.
I hope one comes up soon in your area. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/10/2005 11:35:25 PM | well,
I had a guy from another site whom I only talked to three times, Just decent conversation stalk me for over a month which is why I have been gone for sometime recently. The rcmp had my computer as evidence, He came to my home about four weeks ago I had never told him where I lived or my full name I opened the door a crack he asked if he could come in I said no immedeatly and shut the door, he started screaming at the top of his lungs calling me every name in the book,
I phoned the cops and he left I went into the city the next weekend. My father noticed a car circling the block and slowling down in front of his home, he grabed his hunting rifle the guy took off. Then while shopping with my step mother and baby sister he came up to me and told me that If I did'nt go with him he would kill me and my family.
He had a gun in his pocket which he showed me soon after saying so,weather or not it was loaded I have no clue. a clerk in the store ahd seen what was happening and called the police
He tried to get away through the back doors they caught him..Honestly I have never been so scared my intire life, I later found out that he was a wanted pedophile and serial internet rapist that they ahd been looking for , for 2 years. He was a known hacker and the rcmp say he used "spybot material" to get my full name and he worked his way from there.
They would'nt give me much details just that he had photographed me over a two week period. He is now in jail for the next 25 years thank god I warning to all is you can never be too carefull with anyone on any site keep your gaurds up and never give away personal information
brittxoxo | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/11/2005 10:01:17 AM | Sorry your experience must have terrified you to death. Heard something similar on Oprah lately. Can't get worse unless you die.
My rule is chat for a month without giving more than my userID as a name. Read between the lines. If lies start coming hit block. Never give out where you live or your phone number until you feel very secure. ALWAYS meet in a public place. I've even arranged friends to be there sitting at another table in case I run into trouble.
Never invite them to your home or go to their home until you've met at least six times and have NO warning bells going off.
I ended up raped two years ago because i didn't follow these basic rules. He plead guilty, got three months in jail, 12 months probation, then I hit him with a pain and suffering suit and won 7,500. But that does not take away the experience and lessons learned. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/11/2005 11:56:48 AM | | BTW this guy I'm speaking about just got evicted again for the sixth time, and three women have approached me who know who he is and have had problems with this same person. Sorry to hear it, but it's nice sometimes to know you aren't the only one. Standing together will defeat them, being silent will slowly wipe them out. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/12/2005 8:56:47 AM | | Yes, Georgie,,what Ticket said. Contact the moderator, and block these turkies who are offensive to you. We have a mix of the good, the bad, and the ugly in here like everywhere else. I'm lucky I guess in that I'm married, and too old to play those dumb games. I offer some advice based strictly on my opinions only, and like to have fun. Most of the people are good I think. So just toughen your hide, and blow off those bad ones. | |
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Ainsel
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Joined: 2/20/2005
Msg: 90 | |
| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/12/2005 10:12:02 AM | Georgie: just a thought, can you not cut and paste the email first, so that you have a copy of it, then block. Either that or get a hard copy of it before you block.
What a PITA though for you to be going through all this. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/12/2005 6:10:17 PM |
PS he's back. Only took him two days to figure it out. Caps in his ID WPDS, location this time Edmonton Alberta
I just got an email from a female membero of POF saying in essence that this information is not enough to keep women like herself safe.... and makes them a victim. I beg to disagree.. since all caps and location are stated, sure wouldn't be hard to spot this dude, would it?
Didn't deserve that, it was a low blow, since I'm the one he has been stalking since November! | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/12/2005 6:23:46 PM | Why not make him known to the ladies on POF so nobody else gets stalked by him. And then all the guys can write to him and tell him how it is 
Ignoring him is good but you might want to talk to the police too...who knows how wacko this guy is if he's been doing this since December. What next? You just never know. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/12/2005 6:40:17 PM | Thanks Angel. The local police are involved. I don't block now until they have copies of his posts and emails. They are tracking him and I am working closely with them. To breech that and risk jeopardizing the investigation would be stupid on my part. I posted this thread number one to make others aware this happens, and two to give enough info that they are not at risk from this fellow.
Being aware is 99% of staying safe. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/13/2005 10:15:15 AM | I've got to ask a favor. I am not Ann Landers, nor do I want emails from every woman ever stalked on here. *sigh* I thought I was doing a good thing here, seems to have caused me more grief than good. I have people accusing me of putting the general population of women at risk for not violating TOS regs and exposing this person by name! I can't believe this.
IF you are being stalked on here report it to your police and POF, between the two you should be safe. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 7/6/2005 7:57:20 AM | RESSERECTION OF THIS THREAD AS ACCORDING TO NEW POF RULES ABOUT TOPICS AND THREADS
OP:
Trusting people who contact you to be telling the truth then discovering they are players!
Here are a couple of examples:
1. I chat with a guy for a week and meet him for supper.. Many things he tells me just don't add up before we meet...everything points to he's either living with someone or in the middle of a nasty breakup.. he promises me to take me to his place after supper to set my mind at ease, then doesn't.... what alternative is there for this player? I wasn't playing with him, he was with me though.
2. Another guy contacts me. Something is vaguely familiar, but I can't place his face in my mind... after a week of chatting I invite him for a BBQ steak dinner at my place...since a neighbor of mine would be there as well, I felt safe doing this... then 50 minutes before supper he emails me and tells me the brakes on his truck gave out and he can't make it... Now how often do you hear this as an excuse? Not often.. But it rings a bell... I go back into my MSN archieves to a year ago, and guess what.... same guy.. same excuse... well call me a flat headed moron! I got played again!
3. I'm dating a guy last Christmas, we are getting alone really well, even take a trip together... we start spending most our time together at his place... that's when I notice that every single day the gal he dated before me is phoning him and saying her tap sprung a leak or her drier won't work, or her toilet is plugged.. I notice this guy runs out the door to solve her problems, leaving me for hours on end alone, and finally I wise up and realize once again I'm being played by a player... he's spending two to three hours fixing a leaking faucet... give me a break... I wasn't born yesterday... this time my heart was somewhat invested...When confronted he admits he just can't seem to let her go and yes he's still screwing her when he goes over... I say bye and never look back, slink home and lick my wounds.
In my opinion players are the types of people I've mentioned above. Silly pictures don't make for misleading in forums, they are like a business card, you get what you put out there so don't complain... the real players leave one feeling battered and used and like a fool. There is an emotional cost when a real player plays you for a fool.
Who else is having these experiences? How can you tell he's a player before you get sucked into his web? | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 10/26/2006 6:36:27 PM | | there are players also....i met a man on here who said he wanted longterm-that he wanted a wife---i found out the hard way that he is just playing thru his list of women who want longterm....he wanted me to post naked photos to him and have phone sex with him.....then he sent me an email that was in reply to a nother woman..her being naked all save a leather vest.....so i went back and checked my emails from him only once did he use my name.....normally i was just babe or doll......then i checked and found out that the whole time he was emailing me he wasn't even reading my replies..he was just deleating them without reading them..then just sending a email saying how is was good to hear from me......he told me he had a list of women as a back up just in case I didnt "fit"......i got out at once....but I still see him on here some times 3/4 times a day adding to his "list" that is sick.. if all he want is sex he needs to say so ..he talked to me about how we would be together forever...but the whole time he was making his list....i can understand keeping your profile up till you are sure you have the right one.....but I do draw the line on making a list of who you are going to screw next..that is tacky......becarful not everyone tells the truth on here..... | |
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in whole-hearted agreement with Georgie AND Lone56Wolf! Git them varmints!