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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 10/26/2006 7:09:32 PM | ah, the joys of online dating. all you can do hon is just keep blocking and blocking.
i dont think theres anything you can do with it. now if you could get his IP address you could get him in trouble with the FBI for cyber stalking. thats a given. they'll take away his right ot own a compuyer after enough complaints. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 11/2/2006 9:14:19 AM | | If I was being stalked, then I would just delete my profile. There was a guy here not too long ago, who I thought was interesting enough as A FRIEND. Well, I deleted my profile bc I was getting too addicted to the forums ( lol ) and I was doing my M.A. studies at the time. Well, once in a while, I would read the forums and lo and behold, he wrote about me in the forums about how he thought I was " the one " and I just dissapeared without giving him warning etc etc...I WAS SHOCKED. I honestly did NOT give him any signs that I was interested in him other than PLATONIC friendship. I basically stayed off POF for a while, but the forums got the best of me again this time...lol. But, yeah, I would just leave....especially if the stalking is causing problems in your personal, work life ( as in, the guy is visiting you in your home, work, frequent haunts etc ). | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 11/2/2006 9:21:48 AM | The players I merely ignore. Stalkers are a LOT more scary and I take them very seriously.
I had a guy contact me on POF....we did the initial polite chit chat for a few mins and he asked I add him to my MSN. I sent him a message one evening saying hello and he launched into this bizarre tirade about how he knew I was desperate for a man byt the look in my eyes and my body language, that he knew me from the city I lived in 3 years ago and from my gyms etc and how he had been fantasizing about me for years.
Yes, instantly blocked......but he knows who I am and I do NOT know who he is. How freaking creepy is that? | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 11/2/2006 9:45:24 AM |
ah, the joys of online dating. all you can do hon is just keep blocking and blocking.
i dont think theres anything you can do with it. now if you could get his IP address you could get him in trouble with the FBI for cyber stalking. thats a given. they'll take away his right ot own a compuyer after enough complaints.
Yeah but unless they know how to track an IP address or was given persoanal information about a target I really don't see how cyber stalking is possible. Though it is a problem making the rest of us men look bad. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 11/2/2006 10:41:07 AM |
Though it is a problem making the rest of us men look bad.
no. how could you make a statement like that? you are giving that much power to the nutty brigade?
I don't see anything making me look bad.
there are a bunch of nutty women out there as I am sure there are a bunch of nutty men, but most people are rational and realize this. If the activity gets to the level where it is harrassment, then action must be taken.
I've had a couple experiences with loons. Best way to deal is to ignore...they are insecure and it is the attention they are looking for...the atttention is the fuel that feeds their fire..by ignoring them they fade away
Cyberstalking is a relatively new phenomenon. With the decreasing expense and thereby increased availability of computers and online services, more individuals are purchasing computers and "logging onto" the Internet, making another form of communication vulnerable to abuse by stalkers.
Cyberstalkers target their victims through chat rooms, message boards, discussion forums, and e-mail. Cyberstalking takes many forms such as: threatening or obscene e-mail; spamming (in which a stalker sends a victim a multitude of junk e-mail); live chat harassment or flaming (online verbal abuse); leaving improper messages on message boards or in guest books; sending electronic viruses; sending unsolicited e-mail; tracing another person's computer and Internet activity, and electronic identity theft.
Similar to stalking off-line, online stalking can be a terrifying experience for victims, placing them at risk of psychological trauma, and possible physical harm. Many cyberstalking situations do evolve into off-line stalking, and a victim may experience abusive and excessive phone calls, vandalism, threatening or obscene mail, trespassing, and physical assault. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 11/2/2006 5:32:18 PM | | i only recently joined this site....andhave been contacted by some really cool sounding people. One guy contacted me....i liked the look of him....we were texting and chatting on the phone etc for a few day and had arranged to meet. I had expressed quite strongly that i wasn't into casual sex, one night stands etc, he said niether was he..that he wanted something with more depth too. The dat for me proved otherwise, it was soon apparent that all he did ant was sex.Sure that might be what some people like....but not me. It has made me wary of other contacts i have had.....and to question y own judgement. Why cannot guys/women be honest | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 11/4/2006 9:43:24 AM | | I can make a statement like that because I e-mail a girl, and some guy's that e-mailed her before me created a negative anchor to men on this site. In other words I look bad because creeps ruined a girls overall mentality about men, therefore I in turn see the girl in a negative light thinking what gives her the right to think she's the queen of sheeba, and it's an ongoing circle of madness. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/3/2007 10:20:43 AM | Don't worry about them too much. They are probably just immature, insecure, or a bit obsessive. Do a background check if you have any valid reasons to believe that they may be dangerous to your well being. If they come up with a bad background, then have a restraining order made out against them.
If there record is clear, then just ignor them. Don't bother to rearrange your life because of their sillyness. . .they are not worth the bother. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/19/2007 2:00:51 PM | I currently have a stalker (woman) in calgary, Canada (2000 miles away from me!)
I have had to contact Calgary Police and my local Texas Police Dept in order to file harrassment/stalking charges on this woman. She has had 4 different profiles on POF, used 4 different email addresses, and called me from 12 different numbers ranging from Calgary, to Manitowba, to Halifax, and Boston!
Even after making it perfectly clear that I no longer want anything to do with her, "do not contact me, write, call, email or mail me or anyone related to me" she still sent flowers to me today, and a card that I received Saturday!
If she were any closer this would certainly have been dealt with by applying a restraining order and other methods.
The worst thing...? I'm a recently Ordained Minister! | |
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male1
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Joined: 2/10/2007
Msg: 114 | |
| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/19/2007 2:18:46 PM | | hell i have had a bunch of women on here do that..i dont fall for there crap..i can tell when they are lieing and playing games..i can feel out the professional daters and there are lots of them.they lie in there profiles and they just want to date,get something for free..why say long term and you are just about a free meal and see ya..i hate that..i refused to be used and played,so sue me | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/19/2007 6:08:52 PM | | Join the clubs, there are MANY stalkers here, all have been reported ,POF does nothing. They SHOULD be recording their IP address, but instead they just delete them. They then just make NEW ads. Funny how there are Sooooo many "rules" for FORUM postings but none for stalkers LOL | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 3/19/2007 7:16:29 PM | | Have you ever thought of meeting them to get their complete info (name, address, etc) and filing a simple restraining order stating that he is never to contact you again by email, phone, etc. I know it's a pain, but if this person really is going to those lengths to harass you - it could get worse (either for you or for his next victim). If you've got the time and guts, you could really teach him a needed lesson. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 4/6/2007 1:11:55 PM | K, I'm a bit worried, IS this normal??
I talked to him for a month, saw some warning signs and then broke it off. Then he was hurt (?) and asked if we could be friends, so tried to be just friendly. Today I sent him a little article I thought he would like and he answered back do I live on ? street and that he had been by it! He's still trying to find me and we NEVER MET!
An ex-friend cop of mine says it's normal for a man to try and find a mysterious woman and warned me about being here. I am totally freaked out! I thought I was being careful, never gave out my phone #, last name, or where I worked. Guess I had a feeling about this one (first man I talked to here).
Am I crazy to be worried? | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 4/6/2007 10:56:39 PM | I wouldn’t be worried. As long you haven’t given out any phone numbers or last names ect…you should be fine.
I once gave out my home phone number, cell phone number and eventually my whole name to a girl after chatting for like a month or so. When I couldn’t meet her on a specific day, something “switched” in her head. She LOST it and started calling me names and than saying she was sorry, after “saying see ya!”, she started calling me repeatedly (21 times one night). This went on for roughly a month. I eventually had to change all my phone numbers deleted my profile. When I signed back up 3 months later, she found me within day’s. Coincidently I moved, which was good because I told her my whole name and she was a government employee!...lol…
Needless to say I was a new fish  | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 4/7/2007 6:18:25 AM | | Well, I was right to be worried, he really did find me and still unsure how. Being an ex-cop prob gave him more options? I wrote to say I was freaked out and that I was going to alert the local PD and I didn't deserve the whole thing. Guess that got to his senses, he apologized, but I still don't feel right and have to disappear. | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 4/7/2007 10:32:07 AM | I chatted with a guy who kept making a new profile each time I blocked him. Not only was he creepy, but he kept sending me fantasy letters. Ewwww!!!! Thank gawd for my bodyguard | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 4/7/2007 12:08:05 PM | Holy flowergrower...that truely sucks eh? Crazy that he actually found you and he only had your POF handle and your first name???? One heck of a cop!
I think on-line dating is shaking everything up. There once was a day when a guy had to win a girl over with witty banter and conversation. If it didnt work than he would be denied and often in person. That kind of embarassment was usually enough to ensure that guys and gals wouldnt want to see the other again and this stalking stuff was less likely.
Also, on-line dating has leveled the playing feild. Guys that have the confidance to approach a woman with small talk and initiate a conversation are put in the same boat as the guys that are too insecure to try and would rather use backspace and delete and copy and paste to try and carry on a conversation. When you remove the human aspect of dating...from dating....you end up with a whole lot of really good people and a mess of wackos all playing a big game of grab ass! There should be a 3 message limit...if you arent chatting on the phone within 3 messages....move on......thats how I do it and i have met some really great people and waisted minimal time.......also I picked up a crazy stalker chick....so there is an exception to every rule | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 5/27/2007 7:40:32 AM | I've got one too, his origional profile is of a young guy with a sweet smile , white hat. We chatted a couple times and went to msn, big mistake... he went on cam, hes a big fat hairy italian . I told him I'm not interested and he says quit being an idiot and meet me. When I deleted him from msn he emailed me saying stop being stupid and put him back on msn. He lives in my town not far from me, when he first started to freak me out I told him i was moving to toronto. He knew I was lying. I blocked him here on pof, he makes fake profiles to message me saying he found me and do i remember him ugh.
Then he deletes the profile so i can't respond or report him. I've taken my profile off, redid it, taken pics down and then i just put them back up. Why should we have to hide because of some Mr. Jerky well that s what his last fake name was... | |
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| POF PLAYERS/STALKERS How do you cope with them?
Posted: 5/27/2007 9:32:26 AM | | sorry to hear that maybe you should just not respond to the ones that you haven't contacted first....i know that may sound difficult to do.....do the new profiles have pics each time? | |
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