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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 4/6/2007 9:49:21 AM |
Each individual is responsible to provide for (at the very least) their own basic needs.
If the person is on welfare what exactly can they bring to a relationship so that it can grow and prosper?
So don't shame me my friend...the shame is theirs.
if the person is abusing the system, darn right they should be ashamed. if the person is legitimately in a position whereby welfare is temporarily the best option for them (due to medical issues for example) there is absolutely NO reason to be ashamed.
there is a lot to a relationship than income. what can a person on welfare offer? compassion, humour, love, companionship.. these don't cost a thing.
i worked hard for my degree too. i read in the paper the other day that having a degree "virtually guarantees" that a person will never live in poverty. i'm a clear exception - 7 years of university doesn't guarantee a job when you've got medical issues standing in the way of your career aspirations.
of course, that simply means that i have to find a new career that'll be possible in spite of my medical status - if a person is clearly doing what they can to better their situation, many potential partners look beyond the numbers to the person. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 4/6/2007 10:04:28 AM | I disagree there are reasons for people on welfare! There are no reasons I know of for young, Healthy men or women to be on welfare though except for laziness or Psych probs. Life sucks sometimes and one has to go to great lengths to maintain work or a job. A job gives one more than money, it gives purpose and contributes to society... so much for my lecture on welfare.
Steve, man you messed up..... u decided to buy that furniture, you decided to break it off with your fiance, you messed up.......... not welfare,,, and not this lady!
We all mess up, next time you will be more discriminating with who you are taking it up with, and notthing to do with thier being on welfare or not.
Just my opinion .  | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 4/6/2007 10:11:08 AM | OK, at first the answers that seemed to be judgmental offended me too. Then it was pointed out that the OP refers to welfare, not disability or any other kind of assistance.
As a person with a disability, who would give anything to work for a living if I actually could, I will assume that the judgments of people on welfare--that they're just lazy and would rather have things handed to them than to try and work--don't apply to me. I don't agree with that assessment of ALL people on welfare, either, although it does gall me to see the stereotypical "welfare mama" with seven children by seven fathers, who draws that check every month.
I was disabled in a car accident and have other medical issues as well. Before that I worked as a nursing assistant, something I no longer have the physical capability of doing. I have attempted numerous times to get back into the work force. I don't get hired, for one thing; people do discriminate when they see a cane. "I'm sorry, we're not hiring. (We were yesterday, but today we're suddenly not.) " "I'm sorry, the position has been filled. (By somebody who's a lot younger, cuter, and more physically able than you.)"
And often the first thing people will say to me when I mention going back to work is, "Be careful not to lose your SSI." Which would only happen if I made too much money to qualify for it. Oh, how I hate hearing that. Hey, if I'm doing medically well enough to work for a living, I don't *need* the freaking SSI, do I?
But so far I'm not. Does this make me undateable? To some, it would seem so. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 4/6/2007 10:30:51 AM | In one of my first posts I believe I stated my position on those with physical or mental
impairments would be discluded as they cannot be held accountable should their health fail. I would double their allotment in benefits.
Its those who have given up or just don't want to work a "crap" job that are the focus. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 4/6/2007 10:39:15 AM | In one of my first posts I believe I stated my position on those with physical or mental impairments would be discluded as they cannot be held accountable should their health fail. I would double their allotment in benefits.
Its those who have given up or just don't want to work a "crap" job that are the focus.
Yeah, that's what I thought you were saying. I just had to work in that mini-rant somehow.
I have little patience with the chronically unemployed when they don't even act on job leads. Tell them that such-and-such place is hiring, and it's "Nah. They don't pay enough." Then tell them that such-and-such other place is hiring, and it's "Nah. They're too far away from a bus stop. (I'd actually have to walk a couple hundred yards to get to the front door.)" For a third, "Nah, I don't want to do second shift." Always something. After a while, it's clear that these people don't really WANT to work. They just want to act as if they're looking.
{ot} By the way, mfh, I tried to respond to your "I was being facetious" on another thread (the Michael Landon comment) with "So was I, but I didn't do very well." But I had two of the last ten posts there, so it wouldn't let me. And I couldn't e-mail you because of the 75-mile thing. Now I can say it. I know you were joking. Everything's cool on my end if it is on yours.{/ot} | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 4/6/2007 1:56:21 PM |
I disagree there are reasons for people on welfare! There are no reasons I know of for young, Healthy men or women to be on welfare though except for laziness or Psych probs.
at the risk of beating my head against a brick wall.. a lot of people who are on welfare are NOT young and healthy. that's my whole point. it's too easy to paint everyone with the same brush as lazy. as for psych problems - a psychiatric illness is ALSO a medical condition that affects employability. yes, most people who have psychiatric illnesses are able to work but some are not, at least for a time.
it's SO frustrating to continually see people all painted with the same brush, whether it be "people on welfare" "men" "women" "young people" "people with mental illnesses", etc.. it's not like people are denying that there ARE people who take advantage. and for the most part, we are all on the same page as far as the dishonest people are concerned - but that does NOT mean that all people on welfare, or even the majority, are that way. i wish i had statistics that would put things in perspective, but since i don't, all i can say there are plenty of people who are on welfare for legitimate reasons, and plenty that are milking the system, but to lump everyone together on the basis of being welfare recipients is wrong. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 4/6/2007 7:22:33 PM | No relationship is perfect or completely 50/50 but each of the parties have to feel that the other is contributing to the partnership to the best of their abilities. Not just in one or two areas but right across the board.
If 2 people agree to buy a boat together and only 1 person shows up with an oar what do you expect will happen next? | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/23/2007 4:41:14 PM | | I agree with you my dear.......and also a busy mind is a healty mind...... their is alot of reason for a women to go on welfare........as for me for example. Years ago when i left my husband i had to somehow keep working but wasnt making enough to make ends meet..........If my ex would of been paying what the juge told him to, i wouldnt of needed to get on the system in order to feed his kids..........after 7yrs he stil hasent payed so go figure........ i have put my self through 3yrs of college to get somewhere. I now have a damn good paying job.....I would never dis someone on welfare. But yes like everything els in life as: disability, compensation ect...their has always been loosers; female, male, white,african,mexican and more who are and will be abusing of it....... I was even told straight up by a guy back when i was in college that he would never date a women in college....lmao go figure!!...... so maybe this should be a new subject....lmao | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/23/2007 7:56:24 PM | I would date someone on welfare. Poverty is no diasease, it's just a pain in the butt.
I hear alot of the "why don't people on welfare get a job"? I chuckle, if you're so damn smart, why not give them one? Or give them a tip towards getting one. It can be as simple as saying "well there is that store over there that's hiring..."
And if some of you are wondering, yeah I was on Ontario Slavery (Ontario Works) for a while, and believe me I would rather DIE (as in the actual act of ceasing to live) than return to an organization made of these scum-sucking bureaucrats that has taken the misery of the state and use it now as an industry to line their pockets, with the taxpayer's money.
Why? My life is worth more than 520$ a month. Pure and simple, I am not starving to death for their pretty eyes.
You want to talk about leeches on the system? Well I got a good one for you. On Ontario Works, you had many programs on there made by the system to "motivate program participants into the workforce" which is Bureau-speak for "We are going to expose them to a wackload of propraganda that is surreal and pretend that we are going to help them.".
Many of the programs they give you are "supposed" to give you some kind of skill. Problem is many of these skills fall under the umbrella term "Personal Developement", it's just a bunch of psychobabble and mumbo-jumbo and no employer in his right mind would bother hiring anyone with those useless skills.
Your tax dollars hard at work. Makes you want to cram 15 pounds of KD down their throats.
Other programs who give some alleged work experience? Forget it. What they will do is send you to "volunteer" (You HAVE to do it or else) to some non-profit organization, making you believe that you might get hired.
Of course, what they don't tell you is that at the end, Non-profits do not hire. They just give you false hope. Oh and sometimes, you don't answer to one social worker, you answer to maybe two or three. And they will contradict themselves, alot of them don't even know where they are going many of the departements don't talk to each other.
In essence, it's like living in "1984". big brother lies to you behind some bullet-proof glass (I never understood that one, on 520$ a month, you have to chose between food or shelter and they think you can afford weapons?), and if you ever show some sort of spine or suggest they might be wrong, they will "flag" you and will go out of their way to make life difficult for you.
And there are many of them who act holier-than-thou, and they are the ones not helping, as of course a bureaucrat is designed by nature to be only one thing: Useless and callous. They are the real thieves of the system.
They practically have the same powers as a politician, yet I don't recall ever electing one in office. Yet we pay salaries that are rather plump, to do next to nothing. In a buisness, these guys would have been flat out on their asses yesterday for their incompetence.
So to conclude this rant of mine, would I date a woman on Welfare. That's a big HELL YEAH!! I've been there, know the score. If she's doing her damnest to get off of there, does it so her kids don't starve to death, I will be behind her a 100%. If she is just working the system, I will show her how she is being screwed by the system, how the bureaucrats are using her, and hopefully get her angry enough to get the will to get the hell out of there.
Welfare moms? That's another synonym for "twin fisted hero" in my book.
Kajiwotore. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/23/2007 8:18:40 PM |
Why? My life is worth more than 520$ a month. Pure and simple, I am not starving to death for their pretty eyes.
True kaji. If most in Ontario had their way the poor would be put to death in the public arena with lions and tigers. Most ontario bureaucracy is about other then helping people anyhow. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/23/2007 8:49:00 PM | | Altough their is alot of good people out there that are stuck on the system.....its hard to get off but with alot of support and hard work and dedication they also could get off and get educated and find a good job to provide for their children...... | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/23/2007 9:40:20 PM | Sure, I perfer a poor woman, their down to earth and honest. But I will NEVER date another rich woman. All they want to do is change you. I know a few very well off people, and their jack asses. I'll fix their crap, and send em on their way. The difference between a catcus and a Mercedes is simply that the catcus has it's pricks on the outside.  | |
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Pipnty
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Joined: 6/13/2006
Msg: 463 | |
| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/23/2007 9:59:08 PM | I live in Australia, so the welfare thing is sort of the same but it gets called something else, any way i am a single parent of two children, not my choice, but thats cool, any way i am on what you would call a welfare payment, but in saying that i also work and i am teaching my children that to get anywhere in life you need to have a job to get there. i do not recieve child support for my children as their father refuses to work so he doesn't have to pay it, which in one way annoys me as his kids have to miss out occassionally as i don't make enough that we are rich, we live week to week. but in a way i am glad their father does not contribute to them becauase as the end of the day my children will know that i am the one that was always there and they will know that it is me who has done everything and provided for them, i will have their love respect and admiration, not him.
I do not have a problem with anyone who is pyshically disabled or mentaly disabled not working that is a fact of life that some people have miss fortunes in their life and are uncapable of doing what they would like to do. My mother is not a well lady and would love to work she just knows that she can't, so my parents live on my fathers earnings and they are both fine with that.
It bugs the crap out of me when fathers (like the father of my children) won't work, as they are basically telling their kids they don't mean enough to them to want their children to have a half decent life with all the things they want. In saying the i have utmost respect for fathers who are happy and willing to help provde schooling cost and sporting activities for their children
ALL KIDS DESERVE THE BEST AND MOTHERS AND FATHERS HAVE TO PUT THEM FIRST NO MATTER WHAT, in my house household if someone has to go without something cuz we are broke i can honestly say that it is me that goes without and i have no problem with that as i love my kids and they are number 1 | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/23/2007 10:38:50 PM | | It would depend on the persons situation if she were on wafare because she didnt want to work than no but if this person was trying hard to get off of welfare than why not | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/24/2007 12:23:36 AM | | I truly hope you never procreate because the thought of you passing all your judgement and hate on to a child scares the hell out of me. You never know where your life will take you and chances are you will never end up on government assistance but if you do think about all the words you have thrown out. I was a single mom on welfare a few times here and there through out my life, my daughters father never gave me support or gave her a thing. In fact he stole money from me when I was a young mom working to support myself and my daughter. I have worked for many years raised my daughter, went to school and bought my own home. If it wasn't for the financial support when I was younger I don't know where we would have ended up. It is people like you that make it hard for people like me to ask for the help when needed. I have felt the judgement of being a young single mom on welfare and it is harsh. I personally would never want to make anyone feel that they are less than. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/24/2007 3:09:55 AM | I never cease to be amazed by the ignorance that flows through the forums, actually in many respects I consider myself fortunate that the misinformed and those who live in blissful ignorance have something to share with others and in the process reveal a lot about their charchter which is basically nil and their attitudes towards each other whether they are well to do and down and out. Kicking other people when they are down and making judgemental calls inspite of not knowing all of the facts, it's great to run at the lip and in the meantime lack empathy for your fellow man.
What goes around comes around, those who spend all of their time bad mouthing eventually have their come and uppanace.............
There are so many gods on these forums that there is little place for your common man, please do voice your opinions for what you think they are worth because the final outcome is that others will see you for what you are and you will end up getting a great reputation and along with it a relationship borne in hell!
Me? it doesn't really matter if i ever meet some gal on POF as meeting people in person is by far much better than posting a profile that sounds like a resume for a job application and as far as posting pictures most of them are outdated and photo enhanced a terrific photo dosen't help much if one is rotten to the core and the outside is as phoney as a three dollar bill.
Please express yourself fully on the forums i love to be entertained by the dim witted and the people who think that they are gods gift................ | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/24/2007 12:22:36 PM | | Okay, so how many of the people sitting in judgement of women on welfare also know a man that isn't paying his child support? "One of the boys" that you hang out and drink with, he buys a couple of rounds but his ex is on welfare trying to find 40 hours to support the family he isn't helping? Come on now, for every bad woman story there is likewise a male story...and at least we don't slaughter our mates at their most vulnerable...9 months pregnant!!! | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/24/2007 12:28:04 PM | | I have worked full time for years in a great job but since being single have had no option to go onto welfare because one of my kids is autisic sprectrum and its very difficult to find minders who cater for special needs children, however i have decided to return to college during this time and will return to work next year when both my children are in full time education. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/24/2007 12:35:14 PM | | well if i see she is really trying to get a job and doing the best to get by and not some welfare bt*ch looking for a free ride off the tax payer. I feel like crap when i was on welfare (centerlink in oz) and got the first job that i could how can people feel thats its ok to be a welfare b*m. Welfare is to help you when your in need when you have no job not a full time bluge fest | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/26/2007 2:50:46 PM | Dave4754 and all with the same idea....
http://www.writingup.com/loco56lobo/mien_kampf_no_not_that_one
It can happen to anyone at any time. Would I date someone on welfare? Chances are, her heart is a LOT warmer that some on here.
another Steve | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/26/2007 2:52:01 PM | I believe it would depend on the persons circumstances.
If a person was on welfare because of medical reasons/lost their job because the company closed it's doors/have to look after family emergencies/etc-then yes, i would go out with him ....BUT ...
if it was on account of "being lazy" then i would take my size 7 foot to his a$$ to help him out the door because i would not help support someone like that. Hell i work too hard for my money to throw it away on a lazy/drugged up/drunk Dude who probably has to take at least 4 Viagra tablets just to get it up.
NOPE-not me.
Anyways, thats my 2 cents. | |
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| Would you date someone who is on welfare?
Posted: 6/26/2007 4:51:52 PM | I would NOT date someone on welfare.
My concern was you are looking back at a girl you broke up with for the welare chick. There must have been a reason you left her at the alter?? Please don't say you felt sorry for welfare chick. .....Anyway. Sorry you got yourself in debt, and I hope you work to get out of it before you contact the ex! | |
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