| |
arri
|
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 27 | |
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 10/26/2006 6:33:23 AM | We are intelligent social creatures, each unique and diverse in our own ways.
This is again one of those issues that really depends on the moral centre, upraising, lifestyle choices and so on. There are many reasons for people to want long term romantic relationships. Could be anything from safety and security, lifestyle, companionship, family building down to having someone to make the bed and do the laundry. Sometimes, the right factors at there, and sometimes they are not. Friendship with someone you trusted enough to exchange body fluids with should be natural. | |
|
| |
ousu
|
Joined: 6/2/2005
Msg: 29 | |
| |
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 10/26/2006 8:01:15 AM | I would have to say that the word friendship is hard to describe, as we have various levels for friendship as mentioned in an earlier post. We dont use all those other words that describe the level of friendship often enough.
As for the question of can men and women being friends after sex, that really depends on your level of friendship prior to sex, if you were just drinking buddies or got along because you both worked at the same firm, basically never got past the acquaintance stage, then I would say probably not.
If you really got to know one another and care about one another, but different dreams/ paths seperated you, then yes it is possible.
I have been able to say yes and no for the above reasons.
I would also say that the best/most rewarding relationships I have had have been with friends I have had sex with, so to the person who has finds it hard to have sex with your friends, I know how you feel there, but if you want a good relationship, maybe you should think about it, find a friend to make love with. Take that chance and you could both find what your looking for, instead of a string of ex`s. | |
|
| |
| |
| |
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 10/26/2006 8:24:53 AM | well, i'm friends with my first ex husband's wife. hardly speak to him anymore and she stole him away to boot in my mid thirties. they both came to my second wedding after she promised not to steal number two and with the child they conceived while he was still married to me! oddly my first husband seemed very sad. as for me, i thanked her profusely for stealing him, but only many years later. i think he wanted both of us?!* and now they both live apart despite still being married.
would not be friends with number two husband, but we have kids together so we are civil and put their needs first. now my new ex and recent boy (man?)friend is wanting to be my friend after he broke up with me. i thought he was my soul mate! go figure. i care deeply about him and i'm trying to do this, but time will tell. please ask me this question every thirty days.
on the one hand there is sadness for the loss, but on the other we are developing a deeper understanding of each other. i guess i didn't realize until recently the man thing about sex not being love. i operated in a man's world professionally and really had no clue. i guess my new "ex" realizes he does love me after all, which is why he cannot combine it with the sex? all very confusing. life was simpler "back then". i alternate being a hopeful romantic with being a die hard realist.
i look forward to reading more opinions on this subject, let alone differences in the age group opinions. | |
|
| |
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 10/26/2006 8:44:53 AM | | yes definately i have got a gorgeous friend always there for me and weve had. sex we love each others company (not in love) we have even just cuddled in bed too. We are very close and can tell each other anything. We have no hangups no commitment he is my best friend, we dont have sex now thats in the past. | |
|
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 10/26/2006 8:50:05 AM | When I first split with my ex wife 12 years ago, she called me her best friend, but I came to realise I did not know her and her deepest thoughts at all, now she is a total stranger to me in every sense of the word. I recognize the physical form, but the person inside is completely unknown to me, even after spending 17 years with her.
With a couple of my ex girlfriends in the later years, the friendship has grown afterwards, because we did, and do care about each others feelings. We also respect each other for who we are and the honesty within our "relationship" to each other.
This is why I say yes and no. | |
|
| |
| |
| |
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 1/21/2007 8:38:59 AM | | I orginally answered yes to this question. I have always been able to remain friends w/ ex's. But, now I am not so sure it's always possible. I am trying very hard to remain friends with someone that was a friend turned to what amounts to a FWB. I truly enjoy his company, humor and everything about him. That's the problem, I developed a stronger emotional attachment than he did. He's made it fairly clear that he's not as interested in persuing a real relationship with me. But, he's good with remaining friends. I am just not sure I can turn off my feelings for him and put them back into the just friends category. When I have contact with him I still want more than that. Hopefully one day that will change. Maybe in some cases you just can't stay friends after being intimate. | |
|
| |
| |
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 1/21/2007 10:28:03 AM | | I normally dont think there is even friendship between men and women, there is somehow still an attraction from either one of them or both. So Yes, I think sex will change everything, just less or more depends on how you two talk about if afterwards. Sex is an intimacy that you do not share with just everyone (yes, even if you are drunk and honry ...lol...), therefore you will look at that person differently after having sex with them. | |
|
| |
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 1/21/2007 10:44:08 AM | | Yes, quite possible- But it depends on the people, the circumstance in which the intimacy occurred, and it requires both parties be mature and on the same page. My best friend is a woman I dated for six months, and of course there was a physical relationship. We are the dearest of friends. Again, maturity and both parties have to agree that is where the relationship is at. | |
|
| |
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 8/7/2007 5:55:13 AM | They sure can!! But, thats only if your "adult" enough for it and treat the sex just as that, sex.
I have all male friends, and some of which I have had sex with. It's really no big deal, if you don't let it be a big deal. If youlet emotions play a role, then expect things to change. Besides, lol, if it sucks, then who else to tell, but your friend...ha ha ha ha!!
~Johnnie~ | |
|
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 8/7/2007 6:33:56 AM | | One of my best friends is an old girlfriend of maybe 15 years ago. We were and are friends, and there was sex, but ultimately we both had the good sense to realize that we would not be good together. How many people actually have a sense that things would not be right, only to get married and divorced with all of its incumbent hurts several years (or kids) later? To this day if we visit each other's homes, we stay there, even though she has been married for 9 years and I am single (that's about honor and trust). If either of us needs anything, all we need to do is to ask the other. | |
|
| WSRFR Asked a good question, Can men and women be friends 'after' having sex?
Posted: 8/7/2007 7:36:08 AM | It depends on the individuals and why they are no longer together but...
Considering the fact that I have almost always managed to remain *friends with any guy I dated (including my ex-husband) whether we slept together or not, I would have to say; Yes, some can.
*The term "friend" is completely accurate with some, with others perhaps "on friendly terms" would be a more appropriate desciption. | |
|
Home
login 
