| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 11:52:53 AM | ^^^^Apparently I'm having issues with sarcasm today ~ I wasn't serious. I was merely stating that obvious ~ there is NO such thing as "tradition" for most today. It's a lost art, save for a few cultures that actually value their traditions...it's certainly not common in the states to have any type of traditional values (and no, we don't need to get into the traditional Christian values debate, thanks though!!) Culture/tradition are lost in a sea of Americanization. Sadly.  | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 12:09:17 PM | Yep. They marry over lust, convenience and for many of the wrong reasons. Love not usually being chief among them, never mind actually sticking to the vows they make.
There's a good reason why 70% of married couples end up in divorce in this country. | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 12:10:28 PM | my family used to bug me and ask me when i am getting married.. my simple answer to them is i dont NEED to get married yet. i find that alot of paople are getting married out of need, need to reproduce, need to be not lonley, need to have sex, need help with buying a house or keeping it clean. these are all things i dont need. some of my family believe because im a single dad that i need a wife..not so
i have a house, a car, a career, a successful business and i can cook and clean all by myself, and hey my sex life is great..
i have a whole master plan to it and i figure that if i can find someone that loves me the way my son loves me than i will be all good
and hey if this never happens, oh well because im signing a prenup anyways
a friend once told me that the person you marry and the person you divorce are 2 different people anyways | |
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ousu
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Joined: 6/2/2005
Msg: 29 | |
| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 3:27:24 PM | Rainbowfishh, the question I replied was about the traditional meaning of the marriage, not how it is nowadays in ... well, that also differs depending on the society you are living in :)
(P.S. The summer pictures: Helsinki this summer, winter pict Helsinki last winter. Heh, pretty cold heaven, let me tell :p ) | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 5:38:02 PM | The reasons for marriage are many as the many comments in this thread provide but the terms should be constant and unwavering for all ---> for life. That has been the most successful formula. More emphasis on open communication, problem resolution, compromise and family sacrifice and less emphasis on absolutes, short term happiness, and personal needs. Marriage for life, a timeless tradition to be honored, regardless of the times in which we live or have lived.
Peace | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 6:47:20 PM | | Marriage is an institution and unless you are in love with your cell mate I would think that your life will be about fighting for the pudding at every meal . | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 6:52:42 PM | | ^^wives are better I had to use one^^ sorry couldn't resist the turn around. why do we get so bitter ?? oh yeah casue she blew my friends!! go figure? | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 6:52:46 PM | yes they do
my ex met a guy in a bar and said yes 6 days later
how long is that gonna last | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 6:58:48 PM | vindicator, yer so hot i want to marry you....
for all the true and traditonal reasons!!! hmmmm........ u r freakin' hot!!! | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 9/7/2006 7:00:52 PM | I met a guy on here. We started a long distance relationship. Not even a month into it, he was throwing out the "M" word. I couldn't believe it. That was a total sigh. Oh ya and I am single again. I wonder why. | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/24/2007 5:40:54 PM | | you are so right , i guess we are to silly an d fall to fast , what ever happened to true love | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/24/2007 6:14:24 PM | | Yep. Thats why the divorce rate is so high. | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/24/2007 6:40:08 PM | I would have said the divorce rate is too high because people aren't willing or able to work through problems that likely will occur in any long term relationship. And our culture sez that's fine: when was the last time you got a toaster, a printer, or a vacuum repaired? Thought so. You tossed and got a new one, right?
Time from meeting to deciding to marry is pretty irrelevant. The very best marriage I know of was decided in three days and has lasted 33 years, and eleven children. AND they're happy and love each other. I've seen five-year engagements end worse. As always, it depends on the peeps, what they know about themselves, what they're able to give, and whom they actually meet.
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/24/2007 6:48:43 PM | Which "true traditional reasons" are those? Protection, security, money, (a dowry,) political gain, religious reasons, to make your mom happy?
Jeez. | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/24/2007 7:44:31 PM | Nope, child support for those in that category of liability, spousal alimony and loss of real and personal property makes folks think several times over. Sorry, the good old days are gone when one can eat, drink and remarry over and over again! | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/24/2007 8:45:09 PM | | SH~T ~~~~~ NO! trailer trash is not that stupid! ~~ are they? dar | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/24/2007 8:55:36 PM | Well my divorce is on that high rate list....just got a divorce this past MArch and my ex got remarried not even two months after it was finalized (May to be exact)......people have told me he was cheating on me and I wouldn not believe it, but I guess that was my proof when he married another woman right off the bat. I guess you can say people get marry because they are afraid to be alone anymore.
By the way have a  | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/24/2007 10:41:41 PM | Traditional? You mean do people run off and get married so that their families can have an investment in the land surrounding the lord? ... No, not anymore...
Usually people get married because they love eachother nowadays. | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/25/2007 9:42:21 PM | | All I can offer is my own opinion. If I ever marry again, it will be because I have found someone I deeply love and can hopefully share the rest of my days with. I married for other reasons before, and it just plain didn't work for ME....or for them, since they left. | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/26/2007 9:46:39 AM | I'm actually one that did jump the gun and marry someone far too fast.
I met my ex husband on December 19th 1999 and by the 2nd of january 200o we were living together. It was so fast and I regret it so much, but still continued to live with him then one day we just on a whim decided lets get married and on the 29th Febuary 2000 at 2.30 pm we married.............HUGE MISTAKE!!!!!!
2 days later we told the families. within 2 years the marriage was dead, the only reason I married was I knew I was ready for children. Stupid really cos its common practice and not frowned upon to have children out of wedlock but I needed that little piece of paper to make it work.
We totally drew a line under the marriage in september 2005 after 2 children born and one miscarriage.
I will never rush into anything ever again. I didn't know the man.. or his values. My life is totally different now. Left with 2 kids who as soon as I decided to divorce lost their dad cos he only wanted them if I was involved...................WHAT A MAN!!!!
It's amazing how differently I live my life now. I have always been impulsive, but now definately more realistic and thoughtful before jumping anywhere | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/26/2007 9:56:30 AM | I have decided Japan style is better than what we do in America USA As they know the family of each one and how much money and have had common grounds in Youth as code of living so why not marry and then learn to love with so much going for YOU than the Way we do in the good ole USA
We fall in love and no common grounds and then fall out of L>OVE> and split????? | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/26/2007 10:34:15 AM | Maybe people do jump the gun and get married too fast but I would say that's completely stupid!!! Why would you settle for someone that you aren't in love with?
I mean..really in love, friendship included. You should know when you are really in love, you can feel it...but ya just don't settle because you think it's your last chance, that's sad.
I think there are still people out there, men and women...who are looking and waiting for the traditional "real" thing. If you settle for someone because he's good at having sex or because he's hot...those aren't good enough reasons to marry someone!!!!!!! 
You have to marry someone because you grew together as friends first, formed a deep relationship based on trust and love. | |
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| Will You Marry Me?
Posted: 12/26/2007 12:22:53 PM |
Husbands are great...I used to have one.
 Seriously. I believe that marriage as an institution has been most aligned with old society. Divorce was not really an option years ago with the idea that couples did not divorce. You could not buy a car or find a soulmate online for that matter during those times. Did they even have Tivo? Of course they didn't. You don't have to be married to be happy. I believe you should be happy with yourself first. Then seek a partner to share life with. Both contributing to the relationship. I can never understand when people say that they are looking for the person that they can't live without. That seems so old society to me. | |
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