| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/26/2005 11:16:35 PM | First off...dammit Saritamiami, stay away from Late. He's mine.
Secondly, how about talking your ear off and playing piano for ya? ;)
Finally (and on to the topic at hand)...
Women are no more focused on looks than guys are, and quite possibly less so...from what I've experienced. You have two things to go on, when you're at that 'Hmmn...so yes or no..." stage with someone. First impressions and all that...
Looks and personality. Looks are about getting laid basically, and personality will get have you wanting to talk before and after getting laid. You decide on the balance of where that fits into things.
But of course, you have to aim your affections at those in the same ballpark. I don't expect Natalie Portman to have any interest in me, regardless of my personality.
As an aside, this is NEVER a topic where the guy/gal complaining sounds like anything than someone suffering from sour grapes. If you focus on personality, and keep your eyes and ears open for signs, you should have a pretty good idea if someone is into your personality, and further to that, if they're also into you on a physical level. If they aren't, don't worry about why, you'll never convince them to change their minds, just move on.
My experience is that if you click on personality, then at worst you're talking to a friend. If you get the sense that they aren't into you physically...well, you either deal and have a friend or you ditch and that's that. | |
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late™
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Joined: 1/9/2005
Msg: 127 | |
| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/26/2005 11:31:25 PM | Bro' ......Looks are just icing.
I fell in love with Sarita long ago because she's an eloquent, strong, brilliant woman with a larger than life personality and a wicked sense of humor.
That she's gorgeous is a big bonus,
.....but that wasn't what set the hook.
I will admit, the picture of her in front of the mirror reeled me in.
The package made me stay.
Why settle if you can have the best of both worlds????
Really. | |
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| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/26/2005 11:55:54 PM | But Late, by your own admission, one of the main ingredients in the romancing ritual was the picture, how she looked, right? So it is with everyone in the dating. You can’t get away from it. It’s the human condition. And, despite those who try to justify it, it’s shallow.
And, to answer another thread, no, my assertions are not sour grapes, because I did find a lady I’m interested in on POF, and things are going along smoothly. | |
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late™
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Joined: 1/9/2005
Msg: 129 | |
| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/27/2005 12:15:05 AM | But Late, by your own admission, one of the main ingredients in the romancing ritual was the picture, how she looked, right?
No, .......I said:
......Looks are just icing.
Shallow would be not considering the whole human being.
(the picture in question has little detail as to "looks", it does however, show a gracefull elegance)
I fell in love with Sarita long ago because she's an eloquent, strong, brilliant woman with a larger than life personality and a wicked sense of humor.
Frankly, she doesn't "fit" the description of the physical "type" that I had previously had relationships with. She is slimmer and shorter than any woman I've been invovled with before.
Her personalty, made her aspect one of rare beauty, hers is now the "look" I find perfect ......this is shallow?
No, our standards and expectations are dynamic, ....unless we ARE shallow.
That's what love "is". | |
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late™
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Joined: 1/9/2005
Msg: 131 | |
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| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/27/2005 5:39:06 AM | He does play the F'N guitar. That's a huge bonus.. On top of that I bet he plays love songs, the kind women melt over.
How many women here play music? The kind of music men like... Rock n' Roll? I don't think so.
Men must server women, that's the way it is now. Get over it, spend some money on her. Learn a skill that women like alot. Do something to bridge the gap between men and women, cause women aren't budging here. | |
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| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/27/2005 5:39:46 AM | Case in point. I was on this site a little than 3 months ago, with the exact same words in the profile. same hair, sam eeyes, same weight, same build, just different picture, a picture of me. Sent out over 100 emails. Got 5 returns, 3 no thanks, one real busy, and one "oh, hell no." fine. got it.
I go away, and come back last week, same text, and a hot guy's picture.
in one week, I have been contacted by 18 women, all saying really nice things. I mean reeeaaallllyyyy nice things.. And 13 out of the 18 women that contacted me, did not respond to my first e-mail.
Note, I sent no introductory emails, this time, they were all sent to me.
So the next time a lady says, It's not about the looks, its about the personality, you step up, look them square in the eye and say BULLSH**. | |
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| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/27/2005 7:45:50 AM | yes, to prove the point. , no its not my "dating look". broad generalization here, but those who did not respond to me first time around, then, made first contact with me this time, I wouldn't be interested in meeting now.
The ladies that responded, almost all of them have "long-term" listed, and were professional, intellegent, and complete in profiles.
One profile states.. "Not a game player, looks don't really matter, its whats behind your thought processes that interests me. "
in the first line of her email, she says... "Wow, you are so good looking, I would really like to talk to you."
Hmmm, this was a person that "unread deleted" my introductory email a month previous.
One person was engaged, just looking for "email and chat" and "just here for the forums" but within 2 days she was telling me details of her "life" with her betrothed, and why she was unhappy.
What I value in a woman? Honesty. say one thing and mean it. my profile didn't change, my picture did. | |
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| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/27/2005 9:07:16 AM | OK, I have to respond to this cause I've been dealing with this issue with a good friend lately who is "average" in looks. He had been complaining to me for months that no women would respond to him or they all blew him off, so I asked him to send me the profiles of a few that he was contacting. Seems the only ones HE was interested in were drop-dead gorgeous....hmmm....maybe he had an ideal or certain look he was interested in, too??
I know I do, but it's different from what my females think, so it really does come down to chemistry, a certain look or smile that draws you. I'm a sucker for blue eyes and dark hair; of course, I'm not limited to that but that combination is one that attracts me especially, and who knows why. But just like we all like different material things - my ex drives an suv that I wouldn't want anyone to know I spent money on, it's so ugly :) - so we do with people.
And how many times do you see a guy who is outside of what society classifies as handsome with a female who is far below that? Unless, of course, he has MONEY....so give the girls a break, it works both ways! | |
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| looks mean almost nothing.
Posted: 3/27/2005 12:29:45 PM | | hang 3500 dollars worth of gold on your neck and hands. buy the newest fashion trends from clothing to footwear. talk like ghetto trash. women will fight over you. | |
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| looks mean almost nothing.
Posted: 3/27/2005 12:33:30 PM | Actually gmain, only a certain type of woman falls for that kind of thing.
I know that I prefer rugby or golf shirts and khakis or denim, but I still do okay. | |
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| why do looks have to be so much of deciding factor in womans choices?
Posted: 3/27/2005 12:42:41 PM | Relationships are easy, when you have a lot of money! Women always find you attractive, when they see a huge bulge in your pants, caused by the money in your wallet! Money won't buy love, but it sure will rent it for a while! Case in point Puff Daddy, P Diddy, or Sean John, whatever his name is this week! | |
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| looks mean almost nothing.
Posted: 3/27/2005 12:47:11 PM | hang 3500 dollars worth of gold on your neck and hands. buy the newest fashion trends from clothing to footwear. talk like ghetto trash. women will fight over you.
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LMAO...only the dumb whores will..... | |
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late™
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Joined: 1/9/2005
Msg: 148 | |
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Woohoo! There is hope for me! Seriously thou, when I had money, er a lot of money ~ I had no trouble dating women from around the world. Now, at the starting over point in my life, I find it very difficult to meet ~quality~ women!
