| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:11:42 PM |
My experience with this site is, lots of guys don't even have phones. The ones that do, either have undependable cell phones, or would rather instant message and email. I just want to give someone my phone number, talk to them on the phone, and if we like eachother, meet. Why is that so difficult? I have a internet job and don't want to be on the computer emailing back and forth. I believe you can get to know someone better by phone.Why is this so difficult for men to do? I would do a phone dating service instead, but its too expensive.
I prefer to meet in person than yack on the phone all night. To me, nothing is more wasteful than hours on the phone with someone only to meet them in person and not have any attraction.
Meet first, then phone chat later :) | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:25:48 PM | | I dunno about the rest of the guys, but if I even slightly care about the girl, gf/ dating or just a friend even I like chatting on the phone for a little while to catch up and see how they are doing, even if it is a daily thing. Plus the phone can act as a great way of keeping people safe or out of trouble. If I could count the times ive gotten calls from female friends who need help cuz of some creep guy or something or theyve had a rough day. Without chatting on the phone I probably would keep in touch with as many of my friends etc as I do. So girls I guess it depends on the guy. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:46:57 PM | I have this, uh, horrible phone phobia. My heart starts beating hard whenever I have to pick up the phone for whatever reason. It gets better once I know someone.... It's strange -- I can walk up to someone out of the blue and say hello without much concern.
Phones. Yuck.
There's also that you can't see the other person's reaction to what you say.... | |
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Ahhh!
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Joined: 3/11/2006
Msg: 29 | |
| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 6:55:50 AM | | OP: I'll trade ya...most guys who msg me on here dont wanna chat online, they just give me their phone numbers right away. I like to atleast get a bit of an idea about them when/if I call them... | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 10:01:02 AM | O.k. This question (in my opinion) has gotten waaaaay out of hand!
She didn't ask why you didn't talk with her on the phone all day. or for five hours a day, or five times a day?
She asked why she couldn't get a number to begin with?
She wants to get the intro out of the way "over the phone" so she could find out if you are someone she wants to meet.
How do you get to know someone through email? you can't...
You can't hear someone stumbling over their words, or clearing their throat constantly over email... Like a guy said earlier, "A phone call is evidence", point blank! you can't take a call at home because your wife may pick up. And you can't take a call on your cell because she may see the number on the bill, and ask questions.
If a guy can not give out his number, he is history. Point blank! It's crap to come out here, saying your looking to get to know someone, yet, they can't call you? Yeah right!
When it's not a percentage of a population, but a whole group from the same sex, having the same phobia, eyebrows should raise.
How is it likely, that just about every "male" out here, "just happens" to not like, or has a "phobia", of talking on the phone? hmmm... | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 10:34:52 AM | Hmmm this thread really surprised me. Ive met alot of guys on here, that wanted to talk on the phone instead of chat, normally ill try it at least once.
Im the one that isnt a big fan of talking on the phone... but depending on the person.
The last one i gave my number to we talk on the phone probably too much :p | |
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XR7sc
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Joined: 8/20/2006
Msg: 32 | |
| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 5:45:00 PM | So thats what I am doing wrong...... maybe I should just post my number in my profile so all the women will know I'm not hiding something.
Do you think maybe some guys dont want to talk on the phone because its a comitment...and back up on the guys wont comit thoughts...I mean a comitment to give the woman his attention without others, and so he would like some message comunication first to at least hope the first conversation is not the last.
Just an opinion  | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 7:26:31 PM | | I'm not sure who you are meeting but I have to agree with many of the things previously said in regards to these men having something to hide. My experience has been very different, more than half the men who've contacted me have provided phone number whether requested or not and many of which have gotten offended when I chose not to call. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 7:43:12 PM | I dunno about other guys, but for me, I just plain hate talking on the phone. For me its an exposure issue, I am completely exposed emotionally when on the phone. Afterall, when a woman wants to get to know me on the phone, she does ask deep probing questions because she really does want to know who she is dealing with and if I am worth ( and safe) for a personal meeting. Now having said that, my preference is talking on the phone and I often give my ph #. It is a necessary evil to get a good feel for the person that can't be had from email.
And ladies, if the guys you are talking to tell you they don't have a phone, run like the wind. Either he is 1) married/ attached, 2) has credit issues and can't get one or 3) too irrisponsible (sp?) to realise that his mother needs to know if he is alive or dead every now and then. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 8:22:07 PM | I dispise talking into a device. I won't even do webcam ( cause mine has a mic built into it ). It's extremely impersonal.
Wanna talk? Then let's meet. Otherwise, text is good enough for the likes of you, Shy-ie McShy!  | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 10:52:24 PM |
Telus just sent me a phone bill for over $120,000 for my cell phone last month alone....I am not sure i should talk on the phone anymore....lol
That was not my fault! I said I'd cancel the per minute fees but you insisted!!
Trust telus to screw up that badly. Frame the bill and keep it for giggles. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/16/2006 11:43:07 PM | on several occasions i have given my phone number out..... Never again. I also believe you really can't get the full picture of a person till you see them.
Rule one i've implimented. get to know the person through messaging through POF channels only.
Once you both feel comfortable enough to meet, do so in a public place. If you have a good freind take them with you and have a signal for its ok or HELP!!!!
Once you have them in front of you you can get a better feel. ummmm well you know what i mean.
then and only then give a phone number. Its not that I don't like talking on the phone or that i'm married and hiding. It takes time to get to know someone enough to have my phone number. My boss doesn't even have my home number. And only five people in my life know it. Its not about paranioa, if I had someone in my life, I would love to get a call from them at any time.
And that the thing they have to be in my life, not just someone i met on the internet.....
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/17/2006 12:08:45 AM | Phone calls can be like work. My dad always used to curse when the phone went : it's an intrusion... So much so that I've always hated phoning people. I always picture them cursing me for interrupting whatever they are doing and them slamming the phone down at the end and complaining at the fact that I called. Actually it will take me weeks and weeks to make essential phonecalls, like if I am supposed to make an appointment at the doctors or dentist -- and I know that's daft...
I also mostly dislike being phoned. Aside from relatives and work, only my best friend has my number and he won't use it unless it's important. Phones are shrill, demanding instant attention... and require you to remember not to nod your head instead of saying 'yes'; and to not sink into a comfortable silence as you might do in a real life conversation. And I have rather a quiet voice so I have to repeat myself a lot, especially to grandparents.
Email is so much nicer in so many ways. I can spend as long as I want writing it, unhurried, pausing whenever, not thinking I am stealing someone's time, following multiple trains of thought by scrolling between paragraphs... And then it arrives with an unintrusive little beep or flash of an icon and they can read it whenever suits them, or skim through my rambling. It's the least pressurised way to communicate with people.
There.... Not a bloke, but lots of phone hatred :)
The only thing it's good for is talking to my mum, given that we live some distance apart. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 9/17/2006 12:19:47 AM | | I dislike talking on the phone for long periods. Why? because its easy to run out of things to chat about and that creates and akward silence. In person, you can enjoy the other person's company without having to talk endlessly. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/8/2006 4:27:22 PM | If you find yourselves running out of things to say wouldn't that happen on a meeting?
I prefer chatting with someone on the phone, get a feel for the attitude, or even hearing a voice may make them seem even more a match.
Would you care to have a first meeting and find out she is a bass tenor? Or coughing every minute or cussing like a sailor.
Once again if you cant spend time on the phone and run out of things to say...its not a match...I myself look foward to chatting...eother on the phone, emails or IM...conversation is a must | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/8/2006 4:53:14 PM | | I'm a chick, and I don't like talking on the phone at all. I don't know why, but it just bugs me. I feel like I'm wasting my time, because when I am at home I have things I want to do, so someone calling me is interrupting me. If I want to talk with someone, I just like to do it when I can relax and just be with them without interruptions. I prefer just texting to do simple things like setting up a date, but will call if there is a complication that can't be sorted out by texting. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/8/2006 6:15:39 PM | | I only have a cell phone but I prefer phone calls to e-mail any day.. I personally don't use Instant messengers.. I pick up the phone and call.. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/8/2006 6:26:57 PM | I much prefer the phone over instant messaging. I find IM disruptive to whatever else I am doing on the computer. The phone is better for making arrangements to meet, making plans to get together, etc.
After all the whole point of dating sites should be getting DATES, not just yakking on the phone, IMing or emailing to no end. I don't like the idea of a virtual relationship with someone who lives nearby or within driving distance. | |
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LABlue
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Joined: 9/17/2006
Msg: 44 | |
| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/8/2006 6:40:33 PM | Honestly, I'm usually too tired (I'm on it all day at work and hate to hear it ring when I'm home). But it could be the perception we get that we're expected to have a long conversation when sometimes all we would like to do is say hello. Other times I don't mind as long as there is a meaningful conversation, that is, we actually have something to talk about.
My $.02 | |
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akula
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Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 45 | |
| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/8/2006 9:04:04 PM | I work on phones all day ,i hate phones.but it could be because he just wants you to be a online firend.If someone really likes you they call. | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/9/2006 11:08:08 AM | Pure communication or yapping way too much about absolutely nothing.
There is your line between real love and whatever you call this weird, cyber, virtual beauty contest! | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/9/2006 11:25:03 AM | The assumption that anyone that doesn't want to talk on a phone because someone else might find out is just not giving players credit for ingenuity. Plain and simple they can get a pre-paid cell with no bill and continue to fool those that believe that a phone call is a "better" indicator that something isn't amiss. (note: those are also good as a buffer if you want to prevent the creeps from doing a reverse directory seach and locating your physical address  )
Some people are comfortable with phones others are not. It isn't even a "man-thing" or a "woman-thing". | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/9/2006 11:42:13 AM | I'm not a guy...but I wanna answer anyway!! I HATE THE PHONE!! I hate answering it, I hate talking on it for extended times, I actually DO literally watch it ring...ignore it...wait 15-20 minutes...then text 
The telephone is pure utility. "You're on your way? Great!" *click*
Besides...I sound like a chipmunk on the phone... | |
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| Why dont guys want to talk on the phone?
Posted: 10/9/2006 1:16:39 PM | Me, I hate talking on the phone in general. Plus, because I dislike it so much and it isn't very stimulating, I tend to get distracted. I tend to do other things while I talk on te phone, which means that I'm probably not paying much attention. It's nothing personal.
I don't know if many other guys have that problem, but I do. Of course, like most guys, I prefer things face to face anyway.
I have a cell phone, but to me it's more a convenience than an outlet to the outside world. I don't talk on it long, ever. It's more there to arrange meetings. Gathering up all our friends and going out? Sure, give me a buzz and let me know. But do NOT expect me to talk about anything else. That's what the gathering is for, isn't it?
So, yeah...it's fine if you call to say "Let's go out tonight!" but if you call twenty times a day just to jabber in my ear for hours on end, I'm getting annoyed. | |
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