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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 12:55:25 PM | and yet another " seperated " thread.....and of course i have to post because i am one of " those" guys that are seperated.
so this seems to be a popular topic.. the " seperated guy" topic....just for the record I AM SEPERATED have been for 3 years now. in fact i just got back from my divorce attorny.. $500 poorer.. and that is just the retainer... doesnt cover the 2 hours we sat together today goign over the papers my " wife" filed.
now as soon as many of you whom would not date me or click off my profile when they see " seperated" will sit here and say " because you are seperated you will think that it is ok." and well you are partly right. now to the ladies whom say " well the seperated guy can work it out and then i am left hurt blah blah blah blah" allow me to present a case.. oh wait... make that 2 cases to you....
the last 2 females i met online both seperated.. and guess what... BOTH ENDED UP GOING BACK TO THIER HUSBAND... uht oh.. what did i jsut say.. nahhh it couldnt be....
and the last one.. well she went back to a husband that PHYSICALY ABUSED HER. so enough of the man bashing when this topic comes up.... men AND women both are guilty of it and i would have to say it is pretty darn equal.
and being actually divorced for X amount of time before dateing.... ehh get over yourself already...so what does that prove? again.. there is just as much chance of workign it out even after a divorce. you going ot mark it on your calender when i get my final papers? and let me know when i am " dateable" again?
i saw mention of true.com.. yea... they do back ground checks.. i do know a person who is on there.. you know what they say.. true.com is no different then ANY other site... same kind of people... same B/S as any other site. all the sites are the same... just different look and priceing... and sometimes the same people on a couple different sites.....
now i took a phone call and forget where i was rollign with this.. so i am goign to make liek a baby and head out... with out even doign spell/ grammer check... cause i just dont feel like it..... | |
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 3:49:13 PM | It would be very unusual for me to date a separated man. I highly doubt I would consider one who had yet to go through the divorce/custody process or who was in the middle of it. The fact of the matter is that many people at this stage are still negotiating the marriage instead of the divorce. They have unresolved marital issues, and I know from first hand experience that those issues get transferred onto the girlfriend. It is confusing and painful when this happens.
Now, this doesn't mean that separated men aren't wonderful, compassionate and loving human beings. What it means is that they are emotionally unavailable for the most part. And I want a man who is free of entanglements to build a relationship with.
The same is true of separated women. | |
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 3:58:22 PM | I dated while I was separated. So did my ex. I was very clear and upfront about that with the women I went out with, I did not lie or attempt to conceal the facts, and no, my ex and I never got back together. From the time I left the house to the time the paperwork was finalized was nearly two years. The judge kept throwing back the paperwork because some T was crossed, or some I wasn't dotted. It was maddening because I just wanted to get on with my life.
It's awfully nice to know that some folks here think I should have been a monk during that time in order to fulfill the proper order of things, but I did what I did, and I'm glad I didn't follow your collectively dubious advice. | |
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 4:20:09 PM | | hum that is so true i unfournately at a young age got entangled into a messive liar who was leaving one lover and entering a relationship with another woman though he oh waht the the heck his im going blow up his spot his name is ROHEAM KEITH SCOTT woman be wear of this man walking disease for two years i was with him always a cellphone number never a house number then his girl/ wife TERRYANN LEWIS started blowing up my phone but i was in love so spread news female hes no good a manager scam artist. He is highly immature and ****s around | |
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 5:55:36 PM |
Now, this doesn't mean that separated men aren't wonderful, compassionate and loving human beings. What it means is that they are emotionally unavailable for the most part. And I want a man who is free of entanglements to build a relationship with.
Men and women who aren't married, separated, or divorced can also be emotionally unavailable.
It's possible for singles to have just become single and been as emotionally attacked as separated people.
It's also possible for a separated or divorced people to be more free of entanglements to build a relationship than a single people who are just unstable.
Seems to me like the labels of single, married, divorce, and separated all go out the window when it comes to who's more able to build a relationship. Divorced and separated people have experiences that singles don't; they've learned lessons that singles haven't. So if you take that into consideration, then who's more "free of entanglements to build a relationship with"?
Trust your instincts. Don't go by labels. | |
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 6:00:23 PM | ok as was a sked in another thread about what separated means, ok married means married divorced means divorced, separated means still married sheesh grab a brain just because theyre separated or so called say they are doesnt mean they are single
unless ur happy being number 2 then look for real single ppl not in the process ones | |
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 6:18:08 PM | Oh, okay .......so only men lie, cheat and hide the fact that they are still married.
all i can say is most men dont know what the word honestly means, if they cant be honest with themselves then hey what chance have we got with them being honest with us. some r just a waste of space
Somewhere (here on POF, I think) there are an awful lot of people with their head stuck tightly up their *sses.
Since when did men have the monopoly on being dishonest?
C'mon people .....let's be realistic here.  | |
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 6:53:25 PM | I have read all the posts, and I do have to say, there are a lot of hurting people.
Well, there is a question, to anyone, what do you consider someone who is living
with their partner, not legally married? Would you date this person? Would you date
this person if they moved out? Do you consider it common law marriage?
As far as dating goes,some men and some women are both guilty of these lies.
It does appear to me that dating sites are full of these types of people, though! | |
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 7:04:25 PM |
Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
answer to original post: because they want laid from someone not their wife. don't make this harder than it is.
what do you consider someone who is living with their partner, not legally married? Would you date this person? Would you date this person if they moved out? Do you consider it common law marriage?
answer to questions from above post: taken, no, depends how long they have been "moved out," doesn't matter a relationship under the pretense of monogomy is just that whether "legally" married or not.
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| Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 11/15/2007 12:53:26 PM | right on buddy i am sick of the male bashing too. In fact if you look at all statistics if they will release them you will find that women do the same as they accuse they just talk about it more so it makes us look bad. For example non-custodial deadbeat parents are the same percentage of non paying regardless of gender and so on. A male in public is more likely to get assaulted than a female. Domestic violence is started at least 50% of the time by women (see NOW stats) and 80% of the time they use a weapon.
Any statistic that hurts men they release but the politically correct will not allow statistics that help men or show us in a good light to be released. We have had enough of the media.
Just want the facts maam just the facts....... | |
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