| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 4:57:23 AM | | I've seen a few of my exes in the recent year...some have stirred up memories, but most of the times, it's just indifference. I am pretty much over all of them...none of them stir me up the right way back then when the break up was fresh etc etc. The BEST thing after a breakup is the GENUINE indifference that one gets to an ex, once all the feelings have been squashed to nil. Then with indifference, you can look at that person objectively and basically start a platonic firiendship if need be, without all the drama. | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 5:19:32 AM | After my ex and I split up...we agreed to be friends and not to be strangers to each other..we dint talk for the longest time...I called him to let him know i was moving out of the area...and we bullshited for a while...and then i called him to let him know that i was back in the area again....he called me out of the blue one night after that and said he got to thinking about last year when we went to the one halloween parade with the kids..and was gonna ask me if i wanted to go this year...but he was a day to late cuz it took place the night before....talked to him again last night...and he said he would fix my car for me...So im goin to see him today...Im not sure how things are gonna go...havent seen him in about 4 months....
I'll post again at the end of the day and give ya all the scoop....
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 5:43:02 AM | | LOL she just msn'd me while going through forums...nuthing happened..asked if i picked up the chicken order she arranged for me..familiar feelings...nuthing one would recognize i guess , flashbacks...no ....i find that running into an ex only really bothers me if i havent dealt with it being over... for whatever reason...once the loss and or anger or shock is gone , it should be an old friend.. one that knows more about you then most people... i dont take that so lightly and if my ex is adult enough to handle it the same way it can be a rewarding distant friendship... cant be a daily thing or youll soon remember why you split up roflmao.....but just the same...if it wasnt a totally hurtfull unhealthy relationship..but a mutual ..screw off i cant live with you thing ..then exes are often the best friends to learn about yourself from.....ok im done... you can all put your masks back on now... | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 5:54:47 AM | | I think its pretty sad that people treat their ex relationships and ex partners with such contempt. It must be trendy to hate your ex. He or she is an ex for a reason or I moved on or thank god he or she is gone those are feelings of hate and resentment thats why half of you ladies and gentlemen are here looking for something. People people make mistakes and people do regret their mistakes and yes they may not change , another trendy word in break ups. but they do grow. Some people break up because of physical abuse or sexual abuse anything that hideous and cruel, well thats a story in its self and yes get away. But the majority of reasons people break up for is lack of communication and money. I have seen couples who cheat in a relationship fix it and get back together..it can happen if both people would really dig deep and forgive. You loved them once you can love them again but you have to un burry the resentment. Of course it takes two people to do this. But if you broke up with someone and that person wants you back and is truly apologetic then the rest is up to you. If God can forgive and love us then why cant we and we are beneath God. Try it..leave sex out of it and see how it can be done. I love my ex wife and I would give up all i have for a second chance and with all I have learned I would treat her like a princess and adore her. I have grown so you see maybe its there for you..right in front of you. PS my profile is bogus I just joined for the forums..God Bless and good luck | |
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Meface
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Joined: 6/20/2006
Msg: 81 | |
| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 6:33:19 AM | | Which one? I went to see the Who with one of them at the Hollywood Bowl last night. He's a sweet and very intelligent guy. We just aren't in love. Talked to another one on the phone a couple times this week. Tired of his financial messes, but he'll help me set up a program on the computer over the phone. I don't hate most of my exes. They're exes because of an overwhelming problem. One doesn't love me, one liked to call me names, one never has any money. One's on drugs. I get over that part and just accept the part I can. There's one I don't talk to because he's so beautiful, and it tempts me. No more messes. | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 6:37:27 AM | | Yes I have seen mine. I felt intense feelings of hatred and disgust. No I did not show it to her, I was civil, but I hate her more then anyone I have ever known | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 6:51:49 AM | Yes he spent the weekend with me 4 weeks ago. We split up 3 months ago and have been in touch the whole time, he has seen me a few times. There have been tears and both of us wanting to work it out and get back together. I came on here looking to talk to peeps and make some new friends and whilst searching i came across him. That hurt like hell especially reading the testimonial he has written about some woman and she has written about him.
He even asked me last Sunday to move to his area and get a flat together again, yet he was on here telling this woman shes adorable, sexy gsoh and hopes to meet her in the very near future. WTF is that all about?? | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 7:13:10 AM | As for me....my ex is still legally my husband...but yes I have seen him very recently. I moved out of our home in September 2005 and it was the hardest thing I have ever done but he had become so arrogant and cruel at times that it was for the best. I constantly felt I was walking on eggshells. Well went through the whole 'him playing with my head thing" for the first couple of months and then he finally left me alone.
Last month I called his grandmother to ask where to send the divorce papers because I had thought he had moved....instead of calling me she called him adn told him. Of course he called adn asked why I would want to do something so "final"? I thought is he kidding me...we had not even spoken in 6 months. I agreed to meet him for coffee to talk even though I thought it was a bad idea as I still love him....alas....he has seemed to change so right now I am seeing him every now and then. We have decided on giving it 6months and if in that time we see hope we will officially reconcile. But I fear I may not get over my trust issues....he really has hurt me in the past and I will not bore everyone with the book I owuld wind up writing if I went into detail. | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 7:30:48 AM | | Mine is so much like yours married for 34 years to the woman I was devouted to . Woke up one day to be told I dont want this any more I want a new life and your not included. My world fell apart I came so close to my end thats another story.Lived a seperate life in the same house for two years and that hurt like a knife.She now lives with a guy 15years my senior and does not look half as good as she did with me. But all being said I would still have her back tomorow. Why am I into dating at my time of life. | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 5:15:54 PM |
I'll post again at the end of the day and give ya all the scoop....
Well he fixed my car this morning...it was weird at first...but after a few minutes it was like old times..we were joking around and laughing..it was good.....
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 11:28:17 PM | | My divorce was the most painful thing I have ever expierienced in my life. Ironicly today I allowed myself to go back and experience the feelings that I had on a daily basis while married to this man for twenty years and the chaos was almost overwhelming. I have not seen him since we signed the papers and for sometime I hid out for fear that I would run into him and his lovely new wife who he left me for. Being a small town I knew it was just a matter of time. Today I realized that I am fortunate to be free of all of the misery that was that relationship. I realize now that my fear, anger and eventually rage was being directed at him but I have to own my part too and the bottom line is that no one can do anything to you that you don't let them do. I could have left anytime and I didn't. It doesn't make any difference to him if he hurt me or caused me any discomfort so assuming I am an intelligent individual, it would be illogical to waste those emotions on him, so who are they really directed at? I will not have contact with him and it won't be out or malice but unless he skips his alimony I have nothing to say. He is not my friend and never has been and there would certianly be not point in pretending however, the ex that really matters, the father of my children and I are very good friends actually we are still family, and that is the ex that matters most. Even if we didn't like each other at all we would still be amicaible for the children. I think they call that being grown ups. | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/5/2006 11:57:09 PM | | My feelings are my problem. I truly have nothing to say. If I run into him I will be happy to simply nod and just walk away. She wanted him, he is her problem now. I am free and I am genuinely good with that now. | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/6/2006 12:00:26 AM | I don't usually read every post in a thread if it has more than 2 pages, but this one I found fascinating. I read almost every post.
What I found really interesting is seeing the different feelings people have towards their exes, and I'll bet with a small margin of error, almost all of us could pick out those who were dumped, those who dumped, those who just realized that they weren't compatible, the long term relationships, the ones that had been very brief, the bitter, the beautiful and the confused.
Thank you all for the great read. I mean that.
I think the posts that I admire most are by those of you who have been able to split amicably. Bravo.
Cheers, folks...
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/6/2006 1:03:57 AM | Well i have not seen mine in three years since the day we split and she hasnt seen me ( that I know of)
thing is -- I LOOK NOTHING like i used too - i wonder if she would even recognise me now
hope it chews at her gut like a cancer if she saw the new me bahahahhahahaha | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/10/2006 8:03:34 PM | I actually saw him tonight...(ex b/f) he called and wanted to know if i would go with him to get his motorcycle from the shop...
So i did and got to drive his car back.... i love his car...
He also cooked dinner for all of us....me, him and the kids...
and then we hung out for a while....
We sat there joking around about what happened in the past with us...Its good..... now that we can look back on it and laugh...
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/10/2006 8:13:30 PM | | I see my ex several times a year. We meet up for dinner or lunch around each others birthday and at Christmas time. We are very good friends now and we both enjoy catching up on each others lives occasionally. | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/10/2006 8:18:27 PM |
We are very good friends now and we both enjoy catching up on each others lives occasionally.
Thats how it is with my ex b/f and me...we are just good friends...took a while for us to get to this point after we split up... | |
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Ldygmr
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Joined: 12/19/2005
Msg: 97 | |
| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/10/2006 8:22:33 PM | | Yes, I have seen my ex recently. No I didn't WANT to. They just don't seem to get the hint.... when I kick them to the curb for used up that means I AM DONE. Crawling back to cling to my lovely ankles just makes me want to kick them in the face. Hard. With my stilettos. | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/10/2006 8:37:12 PM | | I saw my Ex an hour ago.....in the bathroom.....then I flushed the toilet and she disappeared down the drain.....Haha | |
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| Have you seen your EX recently?
Posted: 11/10/2006 8:42:22 PM | um yes i have and it was so weird and scary at the same time, he called me out of the blue and wanted to come over to my place to talk b.c hes been haveing a back month, he told me he is no longer speaking to his family and lost his job, i felt bad for him and listen, but afterwards got him to help me do some errands, i took him out ot lunch for it, but when i had to go he wouldn't let me for i know i stil have feeling for him, buts its hard when he dumped me and i am stil hurt from it, he still calls and texts me to tell me he misses me, but i got a differnt life now and its not with him, it hurts to talk to him and when i do i feel like a little kid at a candy store grrrr | |
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