| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/13/2007 9:30:54 PM | | Why not provide an incentive for people to stay together and make a relationshpi work even if it is just for thesake of the kids? Instead we let one or both parents walk away too esily. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/6/2008 8:19:08 AM | YOU are kidding me , right!??
It is pretty obvious why there are so many SINGLE PARENTS. THERE are more divorces today than there ever were, and many parents, (some women included) do not want the responsibility of raising their children, they want to party or be irresponsible. Truth is, you have a kid, you better grow up durn fast! because kids dont come with directions!!!
They can be the most driven , most accomplished thing you have ever tackled in your life, or you can make it into a "task" and they can become the most difficult and heart rendering thing that ever happened . Regardless of which side of the track you are on, CHILDREN are given to us for a reason and they need to be loved.
and cared for
and made to know that they are important.
To push them aside we cant do! However, we tend to sometimes push ourselves aside...and in doing so we lose ourselves. THIS we musn't do, either! There is a balance it there somewhere , we just have to keep striving for it.
But being a SINGLE PARENT has been a given in our country for years and years. this is NOT something new! | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/6/2008 8:23:19 AM |
even if it is just for thesake of the kids?
Two people cohabitating miserably isn't good for the kids. Ever. It has nothing to do with letting anyone off easy, but everything to do with the change in the way our society works since the late 60's. Perhaps we should instill the old time morals and values in our own children and hope that their generation is the one that takes things back to the way they should be.
P.S. I miss Northy. And Spiderham. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/6/2008 10:19:08 AM |
Why not provide an incentive for people to stay together and make a relationshpi work even if it is just for thesake of the kids? Instead we let one or both parents walk away too esily.
Johne,
The more you post comments like this, the more it is obvious you have no idea about parenting.
How would it benefit any child to have its parents together when they are totally miserable? | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/6/2008 9:45:48 PM | | the world changed alot,i'm still amazed how much dating has changed in the 7 yrs i was with my childs father. its a disposable society,and unfortunately its carried over into the family dynamics.my ex and i tried for 7 yrs to make it work,but we couldn't and had to split. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/7/2008 2:25:53 AM | AMEN! to all of you. I tried one - sided with all my heart to make it work in an ABUSIVE marriage for 12 years!!! and again for 5. The harder I tried , in an abusive situation, I think the harder they try to push and control.
And John, if at possible, i think that MOST couples do try to think of their children. No one can have ANY IDEA of the impact that DIVORCE makes or the toll it plays in your life until you run the course. It's very difficult for everyone involved. I wish my children had NOT had to gone through it, but i also wish they hadn't had to witness their own daddy hitting and hurting their Momma every day.!!! weigh that out , John.
Which is worse?? Staying and showing your kids violence and strife every day, or divorcing/separating and showing your kids you WANT to make things better for them??
both ways suck. thats just LIFE. But to also give john credit.
In 8 out of 10 surveys, when 1000 children of divorce, both present day children and adults who were victims of their parents divorce, 78 percent said they wish their parents had TRIED harder, even though they fought! The remaining 2 was a split 67 percent and 62 percent. Still a high percentage , for wanting their parents to stay together.
Thats a wish that apparentley knaws at the back of a childs head , the "what if"
However, IMO, (Im not a child divorce victim) but a divorced parent who had to see what it DID to my kids, and i have to stand with the posters above me, Raww, Laneybird and Sunshine... Even though it tore my heart out to see my kids have to be torn between two households, i still know in my heart it is much healthier for them than being in violence everyday. :) | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/7/2008 2:39:05 AM | | I have been a single parent now for the last 3 yrs, not through my own wanting to be, but for the safety of myself and my child from an abusive husband. Assuming people are, in my opinion, also very shallow people, if they look at your profile, see divorced, 1 kid, oh well yeah she should have tried harder, or, whats wrong with her if shes divorced etc. its not always the case of not trying hard enough for the childs sakes, its about protecting yourself and your child. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/7/2008 5:50:54 AM | | I was with my ex for 5 nearly 6 years and we have a 3 1/2 year old son, I tried over and over again to make it work, he said he would change, he never did and then he became violent and abusive, I didn't want our son being raised in that kind of environment and I certainly wasn't going to put up with it, so left him. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/7/2008 6:43:00 AM | I was with my ex for three years, engaged, living together. From month one of our relationship he talked about having kids, wanting kids with me, etc. After year three we stopped using protection because we both felt that we were going to be together forever and we both wanted kids and decided that what will be will be. Well, I got pregnant and he had an affair and left me and I havent seen him since. I was 25 when I got pregnant so its not like I was young (teenager) and it wasnt a one night stand. I never would have expected this from him. If he didnt want to be with me then fine, but why did he abandon his daughter?
I never imagined that I would be a single parent. I wasnt 16 when I had my child, and it wasnt a result of a one night stand. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/7/2008 8:20:38 PM | | i am a single parent and know plenty about sex ed thank you very much! I used birth control and my fiance used a condom,but these things happen sometimes. I wouldnt take my kids back for anything! | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/8/2008 3:29:07 AM | lovesex73.....Whether you buy it or not, I and I'd assume the other women are telling the truth, not that I have anything to prove but I have the police reports and copies of the photographs taken after he had hit me, so yes it's true, why would people lie?
I wasn't married to my ex, but we were engaged, HE proposed, HE wanted me to continue with the pregnancy, he wasn't forced to do anything he didn't want to and I was most definaly NOT in control, he was. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:23:30 AM |
YOU are kidding me , right!??
It is pretty obvious why there are so many SINGLE PARENTS. THERE are more divorces today than there ever were, and many parents, (some women included) do not want the responsibility of raising their children, they want to party or be irresponsible. Truth is, you have a kid, you better grow up durn fast! because kids dont come with directions!!!
They can be the most driven , most accomplished thing you have ever tackled in your life, or you can make it into a "task" and they can become the most difficult and heart rendering thing that ever happened . Regardless of which side of the track you are on, CHILDREN are given to us for a reason and they need to be loved.
and cared for
and made to know that they are important.
To push them aside we cant do! However, we tend to sometimes push ourselves aside...and in doing so we lose ourselves. THIS we musn't do, either! There is a balance it there somewhere , we just have to keep striving for it.
But being a SINGLE PARENT has been a given in our country for years and years. this is NOT something new
i am sure that you noticed that you are responding to a thread that died a year ago.
You can quibble about the exact amount of time but his post was in '07.
Most of the people are no longer even interested in this topic as it played itself out long ago.
So you new people will have to talk amongst yourself.
I enjoy the conversation.
Someone please bring up the newspaper articles about the group of young american girls who all decided to get pregnant at the same time so they can emulate some alleged public celebrity who found herself pregnant.
I think that the "celebrity " even had the audacity to say " i don't condone pre-marital sex" but she left out the part " but it was a heck of a lot of fun yet I took no precautions as spontaneous sex is what I want even though the consequences may be disastrous. .... "
oh... sexual education in america... | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 8/30/2008 1:16:36 PM | I have a good friend who lived with a guy fairly quickly after they got together because she had no other place to live. She got pregnant and while they continued living together he went out and did drugs, got drunk, and 'hung out' with several former girlfriends while she carried his child. For the first few months after the child was born he wanted nothing do to with either of them.
Then she lost the baby weight and he was all over her again. She was ready to move out, but never did. She was scared of raising a kid on a part-time income all by herself.
He is now treating her "ok, he's not THAT bad anymore". So she stays because she has a roof over her head.
There are a lot of young people who are not secure enough or responsible enough to live on thier own, so they jump into any relationship and stay a lot longer then they should, usually having a child or children in the process. Then one day they finally wake up and realize the person they are with is not the person they want to be with.
It only takes one in a relationship to undermine it. It takes two working together to keep a relationship. Between rushing into relationships and not communicating while in the relationship, there is alot of people out there.
I am 33, single, and childless. 90% of the respectable prospects I find have children. I love children so I do not mind, it was just an observation. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 8/30/2008 1:18:29 PM |
Two people cohabitating miserably isn't good for the kids. Ever.
Agreed! I thank my mother every day for leaving my father. It would not have been a pretty scene had I grown up in that kind of house. | |
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Hewee
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Joined: 4/29/2008
Msg: 190 | |
| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 8/30/2008 3:05:56 PM | | well you all have to think all this over very clearly... i dont mean to discriminate but this is true... most caucasians just want to have fun/sex but when a baby comes out they dont take the responsibility to take care of the child and just leave it to their mothers.... the males are just scum of the earth... | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 8/30/2008 4:27:43 PM | @hewee You opened a door you may not have wanted to with that particlar statement.
You are asian but not specific to which country.
But if you wish to speak of how some asian countries treat their young you may want retract that statement and issue an apology to the forum.
Should I start with the ones who use prostitution as a means for drwing tourism or can we move onto China where untold numbers of baby girls were killed for no aparently better reason than they were not boys.
If you were standing next to me You would be toast my friend.
If you wish to see why or have an inclination of what kind of frustration north american males are now facing check out a few more forums about child support or failed marraiges or one I just started in the ask a girl forum.
Seems that in the single parent forums that birth control seems to fail very often but when I pose this question in a different thread it is looked upon as a very strange question.
This only leads me to believe that perhaps pregnancy was the motive and not an accident as you would like to believe. | |
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| Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/26/2009 5:39:04 PM | Why are there so many single parents?
You might ask why are there so many stars in the sky.
Single parents are kinda like stars:
Some are born from the passionate heat, like that of nebula
Others are are echos of collapsed relationships like pulsars.
Some are from dead relationships that of a quasar.
So asking why there are so many single parents is asking why there are so many stars on a clear night.
And yes, single parents are stars burning bright, with a loving light. | |
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