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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 3/2/2007 11:26:31 PM | ;It's very simple, since day one women have allways been attracted to males with resources just the same as men have been attracted to youth and beauty. It's just the natural way of things.]
And men never hear the end of it when we react to what we are genetically pre-disposed to find attractive (youth and beauty), but women aren't suppose to be blamed if they still seek resources for which to provide a family with. Ahhh the hypocritical double-standards | |
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MVGC
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Joined: 2/4/2007
Msg: 252 | |
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 3/3/2007 12:31:06 AM | Boy, I'm reading a lot of different opinions on this thread. Kevinwm - I suppose you're right regarding some women figuring the men should pay for everything.
I feel that if a man asks me out on a first date he should pay. I follow his lead as to what he is ordering, keeping in mind the price range of what he is ordering. (I think men should also follow that rule when a woman is paying.)
If it goes beyond the first date, I then like to offer to prepare a picnic lunch for an outing, pay for coffee, or suggest meeting for breaksfast, of which I would pay. Regarding movies, or anything like that I think a woman should offer to pay for some of the expense; drinks, munchies, etc. This I feel shows both care about the other and have a willingness of sharing. | |
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atlast
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Joined: 2/25/2007
Msg: 254 | |
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 3/3/2007 12:42:14 AM | Common sense has gone out the window. If I can't afford to go on an expensive dinner date, I stay at home. I can cook at least as well as most professionals because I have done it for a living myself for many years, so I am not all that impressed with eating out anyway. I will invite a girl to one of our regular weekend cookouts where she can size me up in my own environment and have other people around to mingle with. If she isn't interested in doing that, she probably isn't someone I would want to spend much time with so I can saved a lot of hassle. I was perusing the internet and found a few things that are relevant:
Money Matters- Two red flags you can spot early on: One: If a man suggests splitting the tab on a first date, the woman should pay-then bolt. Any man who tries to worm out of his society-given role as tab-picker-upper on the first (or second or third) date for the sake of saving a few bucks is a creep to be ditched. For men, an early red flag about money may not start waving until the third or fourth date. A lot of women begin life as Daddy's girl. A few stay that way. They feel men should provide them with the lifestyle to which they've grown accustomed from other men who did just that. If you're a sugar daddy yourself, have fun. If not, back off. Over time you'll only be despised-and dropped.
Sometimes I wonder where women get the sense of entitlement that many of them have. It's as if men are born owing women. It would appear cheaper to use the services of hookers. Though I have no experience in the field, I would think that a crack whore would go for anywhere from $50-$100 plus the cost of a trip to the clinic and products to remove vermin from your body. I suspect that a high class call girl would run from a few hundred per hour to a few thousand for the night, and that would be just about expensive enough to slow down your sex drive. I think the next time I am tempted to start a relationship I will skip the dating and living together, and just find some woman who hates me and buy her a house and car. | |
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Jemue
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Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 256 | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 3/4/2007 1:16:57 PM | Hello folks,
I've read this entire thread and wow, a lot of diversity here on what is right or wrong.
If I may put my 2 cents worth in this, heres a different perspective.....
How about if the man is on disability and has very little disposable income to share? But he has all the other attributes most woman who aren't gold diggers are looking for such as love, respect, nurturing, even chivalry? The one who still opens doors or helps seat his lady? The one who isn't afraid to show her his love even in public? Who shares the simple things. Doesn't that count or is such a man's love life sentenced to death because he doesn't have the income to provide her with the lifestyle she has become accustomed to? Food for thought...
Steve | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 3/4/2007 3:48:07 PM | I am a traditional woman. For that reason, unless my man says that he WANTS to cook dinner, either we eat take out, or I cook. There are a lot of perks for the man in any relationship with me. I don't mind being a lady at home in the traditional sense. I'll cook, I'll do most of the cleaning (hear me when I said MOST), I'll make his lunches for work, and I'll do the dishes. Thats not my "job". Its something I enjoy doing for the man I love.
Because I am traditional in those ways..I fully expect the men I date to fill a more traditional role as well. The whole "she pays" or "dutch" thing is fine once we are really involved in a relationship because the courtship is over and reality is setting in. 
But in the beginning, if you've got a penis and you ask me out, be prepared to pick up the tab. Flame away, but like I said, I'm a traditional woman. | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 3/12/2007 12:42:54 AM | | Oh, wow, I stumbled upon this thread and now I have to throw my 2 cents in too. I cannot help it...I am more attracted to men who are chivalrous. I love it when the guy picks up the tab on dates. Part of that though is that I cannot afford to be taking guys to dinner most of the time, so it is out of necessity. On the other hand I will do things like cook him dinner or take him on a picnic--things that are within my budget. I don't want a guy to ever feel used or taken for granted, but most of the guys I date just make a lot more than I do, so if they want to go to nice restaurants, there isn't much choice there. In more affluent times, I always took my poorer friends out to dinner and never expected anything but their appreciation. I think the problem is more in the woman failing to really appreciate the gift. There is still something very manly about a man working hard to get a woman's attention and making her feel cared for in this way. However, the woman should never, never take this for granted or expect it every time. When a guy takes me out to dinner (or coffee or whatever) and I don't have to pay for it, it really is a special treat for me. I always appreciate it and am more likely to feel attracted to the guy. Some women hate that kind of stuff, but I cannot help it--I love it!!! | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 3/12/2007 9:46:31 AM | Alex Gal,,,
Its a suggestion,,,but if one pays for the dinner,,how about the offer from the other to pay for the tickets,,or a drink,,its dooes not matter who pays,,it is appreaciated even on the first date,other dates to offer a token balance,,,token appreaciation expressed with what ever,,,even if its leaving the tip,,,it means they shared the time,activity equaly,,,its not how much or when its spent,,its how it was spent,, ,,,,heck there are men and women who only date as they think they get a free meal,,,discuss before the date,,,its part of learning how the other thinks,,your dating for anyway,,, | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 5:00:10 PM | | If a man was inviting a woman on a date, I guess it would be proper for him to pay the bill. But, as in my case, only looking for friends, I find a large majority of women who claim to also be looking for friends, are only looking for money friends, a free ride, free meal, free booze, etc... What ever happened to Woman's Lib where they wanted equality? Does that not include paying their bill? Beware of the users out there! | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 5:24:04 PM | i like the way yas call it old fashioned and treat her like a lady
its pure manipulation plain and simple
these same women are the ones after u dump them will be telling everyone how cheep u were lol
realistically if u can at least pay for the food u digested and booze u drank thats fine
if a guy pays your tab like a boyfriend would then ya best ante up with the goodies after
because no guy i gonna keep paying your way thruout life without expecting something in return down the line | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 6:05:56 PM |
what on earth possesses a person to think they are that special they dont have to contribute to the financial cost of going on a date ?????
Hmmm, well if someone asks me out...then they really should pay for the date. I have been asked out on dates and been expected to pay dutch or for the entire meal. It's a put off to be truthful. Especially if I didn't ask the person out to start with.
With women who have many options, men do have to put forward more to make themselves a better option than whoever else is out there trying to steal the woman away. Often times, the said man is not the only one wanting to go out with the woman in question.
Usually that is one of the things that I will look at when I go on a first date. If a guy is frugal, not so much if he has a lot of money (a guy can have a lot of money but be cheap as well). That is a better reflection of what the relationship will be like. | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 6:48:21 PM | all i can say is get a job
if a guy asks u out on a date it isnt his responsibility to feed u unless of course his payment is u putting out, otherwise what is it worth to him i mean u are just a date .
u have the ability to say no or to arrange details up front
personally i pay for the date regardless but thats neither here nor there
the gaul of your attitude, whats so special about a woman who is so flat broke she needs to date men to eat lol
personally honesty count for something, dont play the treat me like a lady card or act like u have done something to deserve special treatment just because u think u are pretty enuf to deserve men paying your way
have some self respect and demand equality like the womens liberation movement granted u
u cant have it both ways
men already have to few rights in this society slappin us in the face with your bar tab isnt to polite or ladylike
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 9:02:11 PM | personally i think if a guy asks a woman out, both should go into this with the idea ur paying dutch(at least for the first few dates) this is cuz ur just friends , ur testing the grounds if u will. if the guy offers to pay good on him he's few and far btwn...extra bonus points for him! Once the couple is seeing or dateing then its all choice than and it shouldnt be manitory they guy pays, u find out more bout the personality of the person with their actions on the first dates,(decrease the stresses at first dates take notice of important additudes and leave less important issues like, finances to be dealt with afterwards.) Not to say finances r not important but its not the only thing that attracts men and women.
y is it some men(not all men) think that women can only give sex as the payment for taking a lady out? What makes men play the " i spent money on u so i get sex" card ? thats pretty unreasonable most ladies rnt whores im hopeing most men know and understand this!
I think both men and women know the answer to this one its nasty guys and women out there that make it hard for reasonable n decent men and women who just wanna meet the same! hope that answered the question! Plus is it so hard for ppl just to say we r going as friends or lets split the bill? y assume u might as well ask or u will nvr know! | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 9:17:02 PM |
y is it some men(not all men) think that women can only give sex as the payment for taking a lady out? What makes men play the " i spent money on u so i get sex" card ? thats pretty unreasonable most ladies rnt whores im hopeing most men know and understand this!
I know that is horrible!!! Men that think that way deserve to have their credit card taken for a ride. | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 9:56:15 PM | if a guy asks u out on a date it isnt his responsibility to feed u unless of course his payment is u putting out, otherwise what is it worth to him i mean u are just a date .
whats so special about a woman who is so flat broke she needs to date men to eat lol
Who said anything about being flat broke?
Your post almost sounds like you are shopping for a prostitute but the payment is a meal rather than cash.
just because u think u are pretty enuf to deserve men paying your way
have some self respect and demand equality like the womens liberation movement granted u
I think you are missing the point entirely. If I wanted to pay for my meal or for my companion's meal...I would go out with some already established friends. At least I would know that it would be fun, and that we have things in common. On a date, if a guy wants to fall into the just friends category he can go dutch...but then why would I bother? I am not looking for more guy friends.
Actually, I am not a feminist. | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 10:52:21 PM | Boy oh boy all the things that women keep bringing up. Having babies cleaning and all the things they have to do. The guys thinking that all they are wanted for is a sugar daddy and women taking advantage of them. If I invite a woman to dinner for a first date of what ever I will pay for the dinner no questions asked. I have had women ask to pay but I dont accept. In my experience if I know that my date doesnt have the money to pay for dinner then I will not let her pay. If there is a second date then if she wants she can cook a meal at home or cook a meal at my house . So what if a women or a man pays for dinner on the first date. I think of it as an investment to finding the woman that I am looking for. If not well then your investment didnt make out. People do you really want to take that chance of missing out on Miss or Mr.right over who pays for a stupid meal. Geat real people. Its not about paying its about finding that one and only. | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 10:54:40 PM | If I wanted to pay for my meal or for my companion's meal...I would go out with some already established friends.
so then u admit u use manipulation to get strange men to buy u meals
as u know if you go with ppl u know already they will expect u to pay your own way
lol n ya nvr made me no babies or cleaned my house or baked me a pie lol so why would i b obligated to feed u?
if u wanna come out on a date thats fine but dont take a mans generosity as his duty
no man owes a woman anything that they dont earn and vice versa
no woman owes a man anything they didnt earn either
but dont pretend that because u are old fashioned and expect this n that from any man who would dare try to approach u that u are doing him a favor by letting him feed ur royal highness or that it is his duty
we are all adults and we all know the rules and the innuendos of any encounter
we as men know if a woman invites us up to her room for a meal that umm shes prolly gonna wanna b romantic
same ggoes for a man if he invites u out to a nice restraunt and is all romantic then u know damn well what hes doing
unless u just dropped off the banana wagon and are nieve as all hell
old fashioned vs equality vs liberation who would win
whod even wanna play?
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/28/2007 11:11:52 PM | so then u admit u use manipulation to get strange men to buy u meals
Good grief, did someone roll off of the wrong side of the bed and hit their head this morning?
I don't date random men, nor use manipulation. I am way too busy to do that. Which is why when a man does manage to convince me to go out with them...I expect that he puts a significant effort into the date. Not just who pays, but attire, hygeine, conversation...he doesn't even have to take me for a meal, he could take me somewhere that shows he's been paying attention to my interests...in which case it would cost him nothing but his time.
as u know if you go with ppl u know already they will expect u to pay your own way
Again, you have missed the point completely. When I go out with friends we sometimes treat each other or take turns paying. But it has nothing to do with the monetary aspect.
The point was to say that when I go out with friends there is no risk of wasting time on a one date wonder who will end up going dutch because you don't want to sleep with him. With friends, you may pay for your meal, but at least you know that it will be time well spent. | |
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| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 4/29/2007 5:03:36 AM | hi johnnynoname
in reply to what u said i think that your first point was a fair one but as for the second i think you were off the mark. i dont know if it was because of the way i was brought up or what. whenever i go on a date i pay for myself whether it's food, drinks, enterence to a club whatever. If i want a door opened i will open it for myself and if its raining i will get a cab. we're living in a new age now whether you like it or not, men and women are equal and should be treated as such. i am an independant women and do need anything from no one. | |
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