| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 4:22:26 PM | Migirl,
Let me ask you this question since you are constantly whining about all that you have to pay for and the expense of raising kids.
Lets assume we are dating (heaven forbid) and have been for quite a while. Lets further assume that we have been dating for sufficient time that I had been introduced to your children and developed a relationship with them. Further, let us assume that in order for us to spend more time together we have started including the children in some of our activities. At that point would you be willing to contribute in any ways to the cost of dating? Or would you stick me with the cost of paying for you and all of your children when we wanted to do something?
You should think carefully about how you answer this as your answer will define who you are as a person. Not that I think you care what any of us think of you judging by your previous rants. But, how you answer this will truly define how you see a mans financial role in dating you and your own financial responsibility to raise your children. | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 4:26:38 PM | Wow, the words 'dates','rationally' and 'open mind' in the same paragraph!! How did THAT happen??
Seriously, newandreadyforu's comments make perfect SENSE! ( Dude! Run! I don't think these folks know how to react to rationality and sense, they might attack you )
Cindy O
| |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 4:30:17 PM | New, Thanks for leaving your bills out of this one by the way. But you have the nerve to state I was whinning about my bills when it was actually you that did the whinning and I was replying to your post. Again, try the scroll up and look for yourself. What a moran. I think someone needs their medication! I like how you state consider that there are frequent weekend dates and weekend activities, and then say stick to the thread. LMAO I don't see that anywhere that the original post says this. Can you read? And why do you always try to change the thread to your liking? Then you proceed to say what about the childrens dinner. Since when do children go on dates? But to get back off the subject as you like to do I will answer you're question. Hell, a woman can't even get her own dinner out of you so how would she expect that you would offer to take her children anywhere? I don't take my children on dates period, that is my free time from them. Even when I was married the children would go to the babysitters when we went out. My childrens father takes care of them, he also buy their Christmas and birthdays on top of support. And no he doesn't try to take the credit for it either, the money is always given to me to shop for them and the gifts would be placed under our tree not his. Cheap losers would never offer to do that. So back to the subject: You have an open mind all right coz someone must have bashed you in the head a few times. I don't give a damn if it's the 50th date, if you ask me to go out to dinner then you should pay for it. Maybe you men should be charged for every meal we cook for you. Cooks make good money, oh and dishwashers and waitress make money also. And don't forget the tip! I feel sorry for any waitress that gets you at one of her tables.  | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 4:34:05 PM |
There needs to be some basic assumptions here as the topic itself is too broad based to discuss apples to apples with everyone bringing something different to the thread. If we all work off of a common set of assumptions the discussion can be rational, cohesive and relevant as opposed the the hodge podge we currently have. Just trying to give the thread some sense of direction. Unless, of course, you simply want to argue.
So even if your children are along on a date the man should pay all?
I like how you don't answer the question........
I guess I should have known better than to enter into a battle of wits with an unarmed person.......... | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 5:17:24 PM | I can think of a few situations where this would apply
1) you asked the girl out, therefore the dating ettiquette is that asker is supposed to pay
2) you tricked the girl into going out with you, as a friend but expected her to pose as your date
3) You know that she does not have the finances to go out and you choose a date location that costs more than she can cover. | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 5:34:07 PM | And as for 'princess', who's the princess? The one who has to pay, or the one who insists on everything for free?
Bill 200,
I thought my comments suggested Give and Take? I did articulate where men wanted me to pay while giving them the "appearance" of being the one treating. I have no idea what warranted that undeserved attack against me. I have paid my own way, and treated, on too many occasions to count!
Normally, we conceal our true colors until we get to know someone, so it is fairly transparent here why YOU do not have a Good Woman. A Good Woman wants a Good Man, not a Schmuck! | |
|
mizbex
|
Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 107 | |
| |
| |
| |
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 6:40:17 PM | | You have a point. We (men) are generally the ones that are expected to be the aggressor and ask a woman out. This has become an excuse for a woman to expect the guy to shell out the bucks. 'Why should I pay? You asked ME out!' The 'dinner whores' love this tradition and use it as a way to get a free dinner when they have no better options lined up that evening. Of course no every woman is this way, but many I've met do. Ladies, if you really want to impress a guy, offer to pay your portion. | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 6:46:12 PM | | well also in many modern societies, eventhough many women are capable of working...men still make more than the average woman at the same job. That is just the statistic, with the exception of supermodels...and I doubt if any of us on here are super models. | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 9:10:46 PM | mizbex, I'd rather take you to dinner, MY TREAT!! I'll show you how a lady should be treated. These guys will make a staight woman go gay. Since we are all equals then what do we need men for anyways? They certainly don't need us women as they have pointed out. Let them split the dinner bill and everything else equal as they claim to do. They can take turns doing each other in the butt also. Hell, I have lots of toys that will make them all look like the little boys they are! LMAO  | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 11:22:58 PM | What is this? There are women who don't have to pay for dates? This is all so confusing to me. Just kidding. I know there are men who like to treat a lady (thanks guys!). But it is never an expectation... at least not for me.
For the ones who are... they will find men who will... and that is the decision of the man now isn't it? Women can be that way because men let them. | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/30/2006 11:53:32 PM | I used to be a believer in whoever did the asking did the paying.
Now I'm a bit more jaded and the first date or two are always dutch as far as I'm concerned. I'm not talking about sweating the small stuff, like a few bucks for parking, but the larger amounts, like dinner and/or movie for both, concert tickets, etc. I'm not so desperate that I feel incredibly grateful that I'm just getting a date and being graced by the presence of a woman (sheesh).
After we've established the fact that we might see each other at least a few more times, then we can start playing things by ear in terms of who is picking up the tab.
In general, I'm a pretty generous person when it comes to money with my friends and have treated them to dinners or movies on a number of different occasions and they have done likewise. I'm not going to do that with what amounts to a complete stranger and end up continually being used for a free ride, simply because of my gender.
I'd be interested to see what the age breakdown is for the various different opinions. I know there's exceptions in any age bracket, but I wonder if there's a trend. | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/31/2006 12:38:23 AM | In reference to treatment - Newsflash: Some of us actually do MEAN we'd just like to be 'treated like ladies'. That has absolutely nothing to do with money. It refers to consideration and manners, not being mauled from minute one.
you don't want to pay equally, open doors equally, etc. when it comes to that you expect to be "treated like a lady." in these cases it means you want UNFAIR treatment
I personally don't care if a date is nothing more than going for a walk...I still expect to be treated with respect or "treated like a lady". | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/31/2006 2:04:09 AM | new and ready -- of all the posts here that I agree with, yours are the best.
Although I do have to admit that I haven't read every single post, and this subject has been done a bunch of times with about as much rancor from both sides as this one -- there is one important issue I haven't seen by either male or female: Appreciation.
I am surprised by the number of men who tell me that I am the first woman they've been out with in a long time who bothers to say thank you and mean it. That amazes and saddens me at the same time.
I grew up with six siblings in a blue collar family and had to pay for everything on my own: college, clothing, my first car, etc. I have worked hard all my adult life and I know the value of a hard-earned pay check and always sincerely offer. Dating shouldn't be costly anyway. There are so many wonderful things two people who want to see each other could do, without always spending a good deal of money.
Even though several men I've been out with could buy and sell the county I live in, I have never taken advantage of that generosity, or accept it as my due -- just because I am female.
Whether he has money or not, I thank him in many ways, but I do not allow him to take advantage of me either.
No one likes to feel used, whether it be a dinner or helping with household chores.
My opinion of course, but it works for me. | |
|
mizbex
|
Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 120 | |
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/31/2006 2:25:50 AM | When I go on a date, I always offer to split, chip in, whatever no matter who does the asking. However, I have never been taken up on it. With that being said, dating and relationships are about comprimise and give and take and when two people spend their valuable time together it should be about getting to know one another not about who is springing for the nachos. Also, my time is a valuable and worth far more than a free dinner so for women who are in line for the free dinner, they can take my place too because really nothing in life is free.
I have been taken out to dinner, movies and other activities, but I have also made dinner, bought tickets and small gifts just because a man was sweet to me and I wanted to show my appreciation, men are big on feeling appreciated they really like it. In my experience, I have found that most men like to treat ladies and really they are looking to meet someone whose company they enjoy and spend time with not someone to do long division with. But maybe I have just been lucky.
 | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/31/2006 3:08:31 AM | its not all that hard to fix this problem,....
first use your profile to tell people how you feel about dates,.
explain your side, this will stop those aposed to how you think from writing you
you could always go for COFFEE, not a meal,..
this will tell you if you even want to date them,....
if you were honest in what you seek , and how you believe dates and relationships should go,.
you wont be on a date paying for some thing you dont want to
you could always stay home, rent a movie,. what 4 bucks?...get your moneys worth get to keep it for one or two days ,..dont have to feed it,...just have to drive it home,....
ok the kiss at the door may draw attention .but hey it is a cheap date...what do you want for your buck?? | |
|
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/31/2006 3:33:11 AM | Sorry, but a woman likes to feel special, to be called 'My Princess'; to be put on a pedestal and worshipped and adored, lavished with fine silks, exotic perfumes and diamonds and pearls (and chocolate).
Is that really SO much to ask?
Honestly! What planet are you from???
It's tradition see? (no-one really wants equality, where's the fun in that? Vive la difference!)
 | |
|
mizbex
|
Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 123 | |
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/31/2006 3:43:44 AM | Florapost, I think that is true, women do like to feel special. I have been very lucky and treated very well in my life. But I think that had a lot to do with how I treated the men. Men like to know their efforts are appreciated and not expected. It really is about give and take and treating everyone as you would like to be treated yourself.
As far as New and Mygirl are concerned, I think they might want to consult with Mike and Carol Brady to see who paid when the bunch came along. | |
|
| |
| women and why they think men should buy everything ????
Posted: 10/31/2006 6:08:05 AM | I totally agree with Charlie_Girl and Misbex; APPRECIATION is everything. It's the first fundamental of good manners. The first thing you're taught as a child - Please and Thank You.
I have been treated well in the past and I truly believe that if you show true appreciation for anything that is done for you, the results are just as positive: No matter if it is dating or just life in general.
Sure, every woman likes having nice things done for her, but it should never be 'expected' just because you are a woman. It's in our nature to like being taken care of, but again, as I posted priorly - you can be treated with more respect sometimes by a man you're taking a walk with than with someone who treats you to the full nine-course meal. Spending money should have absolutely NOTHING to do with the way a man treats you as long as he is sincere; but then I'm not a gold-digger so maybe my opinion isn't the norm either. To me, a man who treats me with respect is worth millions.
Goldi | |
|
Home
login 
