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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 cern
Joined: 1/19/2006
Msg: 26
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting youPage 2 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
OH FOR HEAVENS SAKES.... Girl use your head. like 5 hours.... I have dated few women and really hit it off. I found that if the word "move in together" comes up before 6 months... Then its time to move on... I have often wondered if I am afraid of a relationship... But I have had time to consider. I own my home and have a great job.... So I have nice things. Now I do believe in love at first sight...... But even then both parties should be scared enough to wait... I'll tell you one thing....you can date a person for years.... but live with them and you really find out what they are like.......and often they are completely different person.. some good.... some bad..............


John
 !somewhere
Joined: 1/16/2006
Msg: 27
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 3:39:59 PM
how do i tell him no i think its to soon i dont think im ready to move in with anyone
You shouldn't have to nicely tell him "no".
Most capable people, know enough, not to ask the person they just met, to move in.
If he doesn't know this, and understand this, he's got problems. Don't allow his problems to become yours.
If this guy's insisting on moving in: Don't tell him nicely. Just block him, avoid him, or whatever.

It's not up to you to be nice to him. He's not being nice to you.
He's being intrussive, demanding, needy, possessive. At least the warning signs with this guy came early.




I'd say at 39 yrs old you should be much wiser than to ask this as a serious question
I've got to agree with this quote. His expecting someone to instantly let him move in, is troubling.
Your asking if you should, instead of seeing the answer as being obvious, is equally troubling.
 leisha1017
Joined: 7/17/2006
Msg: 28
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 4:54:29 PM
How old is this guy? If one foot is in the grave, I can understand.

Does he have a job? He might need a "mommy" to take care of him!

Does he have a home? He might be getting kicked out of his home he lives in now!

Is he on the rebound? He may have a fear of being alone!

Does he have a vehicle? He may be down and out!

I would suggest you tell him to get a grip, stick around and get to know you, and take things one step at a time! ( or atleast make him pay to stay if you go against my advice and let him move in)
 !somewhere
Joined: 1/16/2006
Msg: 29
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 5:09:44 PM

How old is this guy? If one foot is in the grave, I can understand.
Does he have a job? He might need a "mommy" to take care of him!
Does he have a home? He might be getting kicked out of his home he lives in now!
Is he on the rebound? He may have a fear of being alone!
Does he have a vehicle? He may be down and out!
It's certainly not the responsibility of a lady he's known for 5 hours, to deal with any of these problems for him.
 Just_Another_Gurl
Joined: 3/27/2006
Msg: 30
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what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 5:56:47 PM
Emotionally closed off?!?!?! After five months maybe but five hours? Yikes!!!! I am not even sure I will even be considering moving in with anyone again for a long long time. I am looking at a year of dating as a good indication of whether you want to go that far. I saw someone for six months and he never even knew where I lived. Five hours I probably would have had a heart attack!!!
 mike919293949596
Joined: 4/5/2006
Msg: 31
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:07:12 PM
Why?? Doesn't he have a place to stay??

Never date a homeless person, I guess It's ok if you're homeless too! lol

My work here is done!
 classact504
Joined: 7/8/2006
Msg: 32
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:08:50 PM
five hours and they are lucky they have my home number
 wld_blk_orchid
Joined: 12/28/2005
Msg: 33
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:08:53 PM
RUN ... dont walk... RUN AWAYYYYYYY GIRL lol
 ya472
Joined: 4/29/2006
Msg: 34
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:16:07 PM
When I bought my first house, it didn't take long for me to know that I would be comfortable and it was good for me.

When I bought my second house, I saw the potential right away and it still would be a wonderful place to live.

When I bought my third home, it was purely functional, great location and served the purpose, though it needed major renovation, I was game for it. It is still there and the new owners still love it.

This last home, I have been here for about fifteen years. I saw it as we drove by in the Realtor's car. The Realtor told me it was SOLD. So I said to him, "When the deal falls through, phone me and I will buy it." It did, and I did.


Am I very confident in my decisions and quite willing to put up with 'imperfections'. However, homes do not speak back to me emotionally, but

MY POINT IS : There are some women with whom I would move in with, after only spending five hours with them. So far though, they shied and went with someone else. LOL
 kindacute!
Joined: 6/1/2006
Msg: 35
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:19:41 PM
the homeless have access to the internet also

so do crazies, axe-murders, serial rapist and all other sorts of hoodlums



be careful

edit: maybe she is just joking or pulling our leg here....still i felt the urge to say

huh-huh gurl....get a serious grip

 ~Joy~
Joined: 10/6/2006
Msg: 36
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:22:28 PM
I'm with the poster who says you have found a homeless guy. I believe that. There is no way some guy has feelings for you after one day. I read in your profile that you want a relationship that will lead to marriage. I wonder if you are thinking that your husband-to-be is going to drop out of the sky into your lap? Please, Please PLEASE! Listen to your head and not your emotions. If someone came to you and asked you the same question you asked us...what would you tell him or her? Don't let someone use you for a flop house, and whatever else.
 junglegrip
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 37
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:25:13 PM
Why would you even have too ask this question? common sense
 leeanna49
Joined: 6/18/2006
Msg: 38
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:26:51 PM
RUN FAST .......tell him your not motel 6 and you dont leave the lights on.
 DarlenaNS
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 39
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:27:13 PM
Moving someone in after such an incredibly short time is very stupid, moving someone in after an incredibly short time when you have kids living with you, is beyond Stupid!
 icunow7
Joined: 3/11/2006
Msg: 40
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what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:27:32 PM
I think it's pretty scary that you're even asking the question!
 Juice227
Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 41
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:28:23 PM
Run, run, as fast as you can and block him when you get home. There is no need to be polite.
 Witchypoo
Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 42
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:28:45 PM
For me I would see that as a major red flag, way too soon for my tastes. I'd rather get to know somebody really well before I ever lived with them. 5 hours later is just a little too soon for me.

:))
Witchy
 Just Fred
Joined: 8/22/2006
Msg: 43
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:34:36 PM
What is he, a 12 yr old orphan. I'd ditch this guy and fast before he wants to get married and have babies tomorrow..........
Fred
 ncdamsel
Joined: 10/1/2006
Msg: 44
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what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:37:49 PM
HAVE you lost your mind........run away, far away, this guy is a NUT!!!!!!!
 PlaynWithDummies
Joined: 9/18/2006
Msg: 45
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:40:34 PM
bwahahhahahhahahahahahhaahhaha......

ok what is the punchline?
 ksue44
Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 46
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:43:14 PM
First, you're not emotionally closed off. If you felt comfortable enough with this fella, you wouldn't have posed this question. Therefore, it is your gut speaking to you loud and clear, which is to SLOW DOWN!

My advice is this, don't open your pocketbook anymore than you can afford to lose. Also, don't open your legs too soon either. If you're fresh out coming out of a long term marriage/relationship, take the time to smell the roses, otherwise, you'll wind up with more thorns if you go too fast.
 ya472
Joined: 4/29/2006
Msg: 47
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:44:41 PM

what if you met someone who after 5 hours was talking about moving in with you.saying that he has feelings for you and so on.



Did this guy say he would be interested in moving in with you, or living together, and did he say he wanted to do this immediately ?

There seem too be a LOT of ASSumptions, due to the lack of information here.


A real nice lady (teacher) from POF insisted on meeting me when I told her I had to leave town for six weeks. I wasn't totally blown away with her, but had considered over and over during the five hour visit(she was from the mainland, I am on the Island) whether she was someone with whom I could live with. It is just a 'natural' consideration, isn't it ?

To make a long story short, she chose another POF member while I was away and is still with him. We never got to the discussion of 'living together', but the obvious question was, "Who would be the one to move?"(eventually)

Five hours is long enough to know if you feel comfortable with someone, unless I am some kinda freak and fanatic !

??? lol
 Skeena Rivers
Joined: 8/14/2006
Msg: 48
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 6:49:49 PM
~ Honestly, I am not sure who is worse off with THIS...you or him. He wants to move in after five hours...YOU turn around and ask if it should be taken seriously OR 'are you emotionally closed off'...you are kidding me right? ~
 DarlenaNS
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 49
what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 7:13:31 PM

Five hours is long enough to know if you feel comfortable with someone, unless I am some kinda freak and fanatic !


I think you answered your question for us, hehe... There is no way you can tell if a person is a member of the opposite sex in 5 hours let alone someone you can share a bathroom with. And before some of you say two ppl could be in bed in a 5 hour time, your partner might have had sex reassignment surgery, and you wouldn't know them well enough to know.

 wergund
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 50
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what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/16/2006 7:20:28 PM
Axe Murderer. That's my bet. Nice knowin' ya!
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