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RJB888
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Joined: 11/23/2005
Msg: 77 | |
| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/19/2006 9:13:47 PM | imjust me:
Your 39, you have children living with you. And your asking this kind of question. What if the guy is a child molester? Did that ever cross your mind. It's dumb a$$ woman like you that make the rest of us with brains look bad. You need mental help, not him. Probly true this is made up, but then again who would make up a story like this. Yeah lady either way you need mental help. | |
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8463
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Joined: 8/21/2006
Msg: 80 | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/19/2006 11:27:46 PM | Geezischrist on a crutch, OP!
You don't need to tell him "No". You need to tell him to leave you alone and stay away. And mean it. If he doesn't abide by your wishes then you call the police. This is a no brainer. You have to be better about protecting yourself. I dont even let a guy know where I live, and wouldnt until I actually got to know him, and trust him.
This guy KNOWS you have a weak spot, and he is wasting no time with it. Bet you anything he is a control freak. He could be a fugitive and running from the law. He could be a drug dealer. Then you get more people moving in on you, until the police finally arrive. Then you get new roommates, and it won't be Martha Stewart. lol | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/19/2006 11:45:25 PM | OMG imjust me.........like many have said....RUN!! don't do it. You have children to consider and after just 5 hours of talking, IMO, you cannot know enough about that person nor he you to want to make such a drastric change in your life as to cohabitate together. Maybe he has feelings for you BUT I would question those feelings. If somebody "claimed" to have feelings for me that quickly and wanted to move in with me......RED FLAGS, RINGING BELLS, WARNING signals all go off.
guess i have a soft heart and it gets me in trouble sometimes how do i tell him no i think its to soon i dont think im ready to move in with anyone........
UMMMM JUST like you stated it there!! For me, I personally would NOT even do that. IMO that man just possibly has "issues" and that sort of thing as you mentioned would scare the bejesus outta me.
IMO I think you need time to "heal" (just getting out of 14 year relationship) and learn to be single again and be happy and content with who you are as an individual before you seriously start looking for another long term relationship.
Just my thoughts | |
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daisie
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Joined: 9/22/2004
Msg: 88 | |
| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/20/2006 4:50:36 AM | Lady you are 39 years old for crap's sake!!!!!
WHAT is the big problem???
WHERE is the confusion????
WHY can't you use your noggin about common sense things like this????
WHO could possibly "appear" to be worthy of cohabitation after a few hours?????
WHEN are you going to stop worrying about making Nice-Nice with every schmuck who comes around and USE YOUR BRAIN and TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF?????
Those questions are y our homework....write an essay on each question. If it's too difficult and takes you more than about 30 SECONDS to do each question then I would seriously think you might want to consider moving into a GROUP HOME... with a 24 hour attendant to keep an eye on you. I don't think you're ready to be a big girl and live in the real world yet. | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/20/2006 5:51:02 AM | He's a Klingon, so do what they do in Star Trek, and disintegrate him with your ray gun.
Seriously, though, this fellow is playing you, or he's really needy. You don't need a con artist, and he already has a Mom, so you should already know what to do.
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/20/2006 6:01:52 AM | i guess i have a soft heart and it gets me in trouble sometimes how do i tell him no i think its to soon i dont think im ready to move in with anyone i just got out of 14 year relatioship and have never been single in my life
Not to sound harsh but you don't have to be nice about it or offer an explanation considering he's trying to con you into letting him mooch off you. People like that prey on soft hearts all the time. Be firm and say something like "You're kidding right, because no one in their right mind would suggest such a thing at this point!" 
I say get rid of it altogether, you're better off that way.
Good luck,
TJ | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/20/2006 6:23:52 AM | | imjust me... i'm with all of these other wise people. don't ever ever do anything that you're not 100% happy or sure about...never do it because you feel sorry for someone or somehow feel obligated. it's easier to say no now, and explain to him exactly how you feel, than regret having been soft hearted when you're unhappy and feeling trapped a little further down the track. you can be strong...and once you start it gets easier ;-) | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/20/2006 6:36:55 AM | If you have only talked to him on the computer or phone, and he is serious, I agree with everyone else, block him and stop talking to him. He is nuts.
If he isn't serious about really moving in that fast, and just said that to make the point that he is really attracted to you, just move at a pace you are comfortable with and see where it goes.
If a man talked about moving in with me that fast, I would say something, like let's at least wait until we meet in person. His reaction would determine if I did want to try to meet him. I would hope he would say something, like I was just kidding. If he kept pushing the idea I would most likely freak out and block him/hang up on him. | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/20/2006 7:19:24 AM | Wow, this may have been an online meeting... that never once occurred to me. 5 hours talking online, and he wants to move in...
how do i tell him no i think its to soon
You could try: "Don't you think it's a little too soon - perhaps we should wait till tomorrow"
Kidding, of course... discovered recently I should make that clear 
I don't know what to say imjustme, I really think you need to talk to someone (a counsellor). I'm NOT being a smartass here, but your response to this situation is really quite strange & such an attitude leaves you and your children very vulnerable. I think you need to learn about personal boundaries because if you didn't know how to say no to a stranger who wanted to move in with you after 5 hours, then I can't imagine you saying no at all! Really, you should talk to someone! | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/20/2006 7:46:18 AM | what if you met someone who after 5 hours was talking about moving in with you.saying that he has feelings for you and so on.do you take this seriously or am i just emotionally closed off.
I'd ask them what their therapist thought, and if they didn't have one I would recommend one. Few people even come to my house to visit, let alone move in. However even for a normal person I would say that's nuts.
And I wouldn't tell him it's too soon, because that would entail actually talking to him again. RUN!! | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/20/2006 11:07:41 AM | Have you lost your mind considering this. First things First. If he moves in and gets one piece of mail there, he has squatters rights. He could instigate a brawl with you or a friend and land you up in jail for aggravated assualt and then get a restraining order so you can't go back to your own home. (this actually happened to someone)
Secondly, what have you done to check this individuals backround, particularly if you have kids. No, you're definitely not emotionally closed off without good reason. And you should be. Don't be desperate, gullible or needy. Some con men thrive on that. | |
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| what if a guy wants to move in right off the bat after meeting you
Posted: 10/23/2006 5:16:31 AM | Ya know! Now that I think about it! Go ahead and let him move in and get it out of your system!! Least after he kills you with a steakknife at the dinner table, Your kids will at least be smart enough not to do this in the future. Assuming they get away from this knife weilding psyco and don't trip over your bloody corpse on the way to the door.
The gene pool is really getting murky on this planet. | |
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