| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/22/2006 10:50:36 AM | | Wow.... yes I agree we all can have our stuff that we are senstive too.. but it bothered me to read 'how' he had written to you... very rude and disprectful in my opinion ... I would also worry how he could react to something more severe. To me it's a huge red flag. Ofcourse things can be worked out if you both sat down eye to eye not over email and really 'talked' communication is so important in any relationship. However my first thought after reading his note to you to be honest would be to run.... all the best! | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/22/2006 10:55:03 AM | | Roll in dirt just before you see him, sneak up on him, and then tackle him and make out. | |
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yazhi
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Joined: 10/12/2006
Msg: 103 | |
| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/22/2006 10:57:31 AM | | I wouldnt even bother writing him back EVER,sounds like he has some serious issues.Just imagine if you hold your mouth wrong. | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:25:15 AM | | Whoa...can anyone say RED FLAG!!! What can this guy be like during sex? I'd be sooooooo outa there. | |
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e-wok
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Joined: 9/25/2006
Msg: 105 | |
| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:57:29 AM | He has a major phobia of germs...I have somebody like that in my office
and he's a scary man. He uses anti-bacterial soap at his desk
constantly and seems to feel very threatened by germs.
Maybe your man has an unconscious belief that you are teaming
up with the germs to bring him down? 
...seriously though; in his mind, this 'threat' is no less significant
than you driving under the influence with him as the passenger.
If he isn't willing to dig down and understand where this phobia
is rooted in and fix it, or, alternatively, if you're unwilling to appreciate his phobia and
respect his wishes, this will end badly for both of you. It
will get worse if changes aren't made now. Don't under-estimate
his seriousness...one more slip and he's gonna crack. That was
no warning he issued you - it was a threat. IMO. | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/23/2006 2:11:41 AM | | nothing like 2nd hand towels ruining your health ,smoke in the bathroom ;see what happens | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/23/2006 5:49:05 AM | This is nothing more that the garbage that the women go on with about toilet seats left up. Just gender reversed.
In both cases it's pettty, self centred, spiteful, and destructive. | |
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lohki
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Joined: 7/22/2005
Msg: 108 | |
| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/24/2006 7:52:45 AM |
If it's HIS house you should do things HIS way.
If you don't like his way, then stop dating him.
It's pretty simple....it's not your business to make him change his behavior. But it is absolutely your right to subject yourself to it or not.
So I think asking about where is a normal place to put towels is beside the point...the better questions are these,
"WHY do I continue to casually date a guy for 1.5 years when it bothers me that he feels and acts like this?
WHY can't I draw my line, and take action?
WHY do I need this guy so much I'm willing to put up with this behavior I disagree with?"
OMG. did you read this off of a harassment poster?.. in a relationship not all the quirks come out instantly. Sometimes they save their really idiotic tendencies for times when they feel closer to you, more safe and then they can let the anger flow much more easily.
This issue is about a problem he sees that you have forgotten that he was touchy about, has escalated into him thinking you have lost your mind. He started out explaining the irrational towel bit slowly and alerted your spidey senses ..
that's normal- if we could see what we saw then like we see it now - we would never had let it get that far. .. hindsight.
this is one - to let go.
I think he has deceived you up until now just how serious it is and you should take notice on the jump in aggressive accusatory behavior.
I am sorry to see even one post that illuminates any kind of blame on your part- or your inability to notice this before now.
Sleeping with the Enemy?... oh yeah! for sure. rent it. cry.. move on. | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/24/2006 8:12:27 AM | | he must be a F'n Muslim! Kick his ass to the curb tell the germ a fobe to get a life! he sounds like he's off his meds and needs to be baker acted and hooked up to 10,000 volts he needs shock treatment 12 times a day! | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/24/2006 8:28:56 AM | I agree with Ravenger... some people have certain issues.. dont make them OCD.. Seems many on these forums jump to conclusions with little info.. cant tell much by what she said.. Obviously we dont know the WHOLE story since this seems to be more than a wham bam thank you ma am situation.. and we are only hearing ONE side of the story..
I'm not OCD, but wouldnt want to share towels with anyone either.. or have them piled on mine.. So it's not an unusual request.. If he hands her towels to use.. I would have expected her to place them on seperate places to dry.. or ask where to place them if there were no such place..
People blow way to much out of proportions ... I think there HAS to be much more going on here than towels than we are privy too.
Linda | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 10/24/2006 9:00:42 AM | You dated this guy for a year and a half and did not notice this???? Were you awake this whole time???? These funky little quirks don't just suddenly start to come out. They have been there all along. Girlfriend..... you've missed a lot of things about him, and frankly..... these are important things.
Do yourself a BIG favor and leave him in your dust. Big red flags waving everywhere. Geez, I wonder why this man is single...... hmmmmmmmmm let me take a guess here, HE'S PSYCHOTIC!!!
:0
Witchy | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/11/2006 3:07:38 PM | | get somebody you know who is sick with the cold and get them to cough all over his soap and his shampoo. so that he gets sick from it. then tell him it must be the soap thats making him so sick. and that he is being too careful and that is making him more likely to get sick because he has no immunity to viruses. and if that doesnt work just find someone with herpes to use his toothbrush. (saw it on southpark once) lmao | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/11/2006 8:04:14 PM | I don't need to read a long message to know there's a problem here.
If you're close enough to touch, to make love, whatever.. then your towels should be able to touch.
If he cares about you, he shouldn't treat you that way.
Dump him. | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/25/2006 1:51:02 PM | RED FLAG!! RED FLAG!! RED FLAG!!
This Guys got issues that aren't likely to heal themselves.
Cut the rope and bail.
PP | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/25/2006 2:41:27 PM | | This guy must be a wack job. What kind of sense does that make when you are much more intimate than towels. Run baby run. | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/27/2006 3:57:17 AM | Holy control issues Batman!!!
How is having towels touching a moral issue?
I can see why it's only been CASUALLY dating for this long...sheesh!!
 run as fast as your flying towel can fly!!! | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/27/2006 6:31:05 AM | You dated this guy for a year and a half and did not notice this???? Were you awake this whole time???? These funky little quirks don't just suddenly start to come out. They have been there all along. Girlfriend..... you've missed a lot of things about him, and frankly..... these are important things.
I would say the OP is somewhat at home with his "quirks" (that's putting it mildly). There are obviously a lot of various manifestations of his underlying problem (control freak.. whatever) that the OP doesn't have a problem with. That's my take on it anyway.
OP, you should expect total respect from those involved in your life, otherwise they should have no place there!
I couldn't put up with his attitude for 1 1/2 minutes never mind years 
Hey Op, just found this on your other thread from January:
Anyway, I don't expect any grown man to ask for my permission to do anything but it would be courteous if he just informed me and asked how I felt about it (common courtesy).
You don't expect a boyfriend to ask your permission to having a swinger's party???? What do you expect!!!
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/27/2006 6:42:55 AM | | Remember the movie with "as good as it gets"? thats him..sounds like he is worse than nicholson was..run..run..run away | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/27/2006 6:43:12 AM | | Got to keep up on the world's longest thread about two towels touching. Repondering the situation, I say take both towels outside and burn them, that will sterilize everything. | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/27/2006 7:14:55 AM | | I have a real problem with all those billions of people exhale the same air I have to breathe into these pristene lungs [smoked for 30yrs.] or actually go swimming in the same natural waters[rivers, lakes, ocean etc ] where I want to go swimming-----Makes me wonder? Did they actually wipe their bums in the toilet before they went swimming- maybe we need? [wait for it!===TA DA] another law that all people must shower every day with Spray Nine or Mr. Clean and then have vermin inspectors in white suits check everyone at least twice a day!!!!! I would say, lady-DUMP THE RAT | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 11/29/2006 2:54:01 PM | | I am sure you don't really have to ask advice about this one. If that is what you will accept..... | |
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| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 12/21/2006 10:30:05 PM | If this guys conversation IS the way you have listed it, word for word, in the first place then it's emotional abuse. Womens shelters would definitely list this behaviour as that of a control freak leading up to his using the misplaced towels as an excuse for wife bashing.
IN fact theres only one exception. Women,(drama queeens) regualry come onto this board, maoaning and grizzling about boyfriens to do the same thing with the towels.
And these damn dram queens get sympathy. Male or female this guy is still a drama queen. Skip him, dump him.
And one final thing!.
Try to appreciate that this guy is anything but the typical male.
You deserve bettter. And there are thousands of better men than him on this board alone, let alone in the rest of the world. | |
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Chosun
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Joined: 11/4/2006
Msg: 125 | |
| TO TOUCH OR NOT TO TOUCH
Posted: 12/21/2006 10:39:35 PM | | Theres nothing wrong with you girl, you just make mistakes like the rest of us do, like getting attached to a prima donna like him.; Good luck in the future. | |
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