| would you still love him if...
Posted: 11/26/2006 3:07:38 AM | ^^
Yeah he clearly was after something else than what his post stated I think. I have briefly considered the surgery for myself, because with 2" I would be 5'10 and being that I have short legs and a long torso it wouldn't look strange. There are a lot of great women around 5'8 or 5'9 who don't mind even if the guy is only slightly taller, I think height is very important in dating, at least as far as at least being equal in height or taller. I do think guys on here exaggerate the 6' and over thing though. If that was true, there'd be a lot more single women then there are, as rare as a non-exaggerated 6'+ is.
I like to be physically active though, and having my legs broken scares me what the effects down the road might be, and also by the time I have the money to take a year for this, I'll be at the age where more women are open minded about shorter guys. Another thing to be said is even though I think my height is an issue when dating, there are other issues and its not like you're persona non grata in the dating world if you're shorter than average, a bit tougher but probably not worth the hassle of doing anything radical like the surgery.
That said, I don't see why people are attacking the idea so much. I admit I've thought of it, and I don't go around all day bemoaning my lack of height, most days I don't think about it. I guess I must have some concerns with it to post on a thread such as this, but we all have our insecurities, and I don't think that's so horrible as long as they don't rule your life. When I was briefly seriously considering it, my thought was "hey this is the 21st century and you only have one life to live, if you can improve yourself and give yourself a happier life why not go for it?". In the end, I didn't think that a 2" increase (which is the normal boost with this surgery btw anything more is very rare and more difficult and dangerous) was going to make much of an impact on my day to day happiness.
I don't see anything wrong with a guy who does this, but he should be honest with himself and make sure that this is really going to improve his life that much. I think it would be foolish to say anything on the first few dates, as in my experience women are very skittish early on and will move away at the slightest sign of something being unusual. Would a year and a half be too long? Probably, but admitting it right off the bat would just be a bad idea. | |
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| would you still love him if...
Posted: 11/26/2006 7:27:03 AM | | Interesting post, AcesDJD. Although I did not expect someone who's 5'8 to consider such a drastic move. I really don't think 2 inches would make that much of a difference in your case at all. I also didn't think that with 5'8 you still experience many height problems with women (I'm 5'0, btw). However, height (or lack thereof) really does present issues when dating women (I wonder if gay men look for taller partners too ;p), despite some people on here dismissing that as imagination. Unfortunately it is difficult to have a serious discussion about it without sounding bitter, whiny or angry, even if you're none of those things. In a way, height is for men what weight is for women, except that it is much easier to lose weight if you want to. I personally wouldn't consider lengthening surgery because I don't think you should fix what's not broken (medically anyway). Plus, after stretching my current height to say 5' 8"-10" I would look like a koala on stilts...lol (with less hair of course ;p). | |
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| would you still love him if...
Posted: 11/26/2006 7:49:26 AM | As much as I enjoy being with a tall man (I think it's because I'm only 5'5") I would never not date a person because they are not tall. So if I were in this situation (as odd as it sounds) I woudn't have a problem with the height or the "heightening" but I may be a bit concerned about his lack of self-esteem... to go to those measures just for a few inches. I suppose though, it's not any different from a bald man having hair implants, or a woman have a tummy tuck.
Either way, the surgery wouldn't bother me if he had chosen it. Now mind you, if I'm with a man and he was considering the surgery, I would definitely encourage him to reconsider. | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 8:27:28 AM | ^^
Well believe it or not from what I read the average height for white men in the US is 5'10.5 so even at 5'8 (actually 5'7 3/4 but close enough shhh :D) I am a bit below average. And while the average women is about 5'4 there are still a good percentage of women around my height, and I was just thinking it would be nice to have even more options when dating.
A lot of people say just wait for someone who's happy with what you bring to the table. Sounds nice in theory, the only problem with this is certain traits are almost universally desired, and those that are ok with what you have aren't always what you want.
As I've written in other posts, this is fine with me if they're not great looking, but if I have to deal with emotional issues or baggage with say a divorce and several kids (just throwing that one out there nothing personal single moms), well it might be better said to wait for those who really appreciate you not someone who'd be ok settling for you because of undesirable characterisitcs.
As I alluded to in my previous post, I think if I had great looks or was rich or heck maybe even a better personality I think I could do fine at my height. I wouldn't want to make others think that my lack of success in dating is because of my height, but it is a negative factor.
How is Blacksburg btw? I travelled down the Blue Ridge several years back, wow what a nice area, would love to find a job out there someday. We have some mountains here in Korea, but its so densely populated and polluted a Korean laughed at me when I asked them if there were any deer up in the mountains. | |
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| would you still love him if...
Posted: 11/26/2006 9:01:25 AM | A relationship isn't about height, if he was 5' or 6' if I loved him it would not matter. I think in the scenario far too much emphasis is based on height. There's so much more to someone then what's on the outside.
Just a question would someone really have that done to themself? | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 9:20:38 AM | A relationship isn't about height, if he was 5' or 6' if I loved him it would not matter. I think in the scenario far too much emphasis is based on height. There's so much more to someone then what's on the outside.
While I agree with that simplyme, I think the OP's point is that a lot of women on here have "want a guy 6'+" in their profiles, etc. So its not that you wouldn't accept him for what he is on the "inside", so much as you'd never actually *meet* him because you'd immediately write him off when his profile said 5'2". He may be the most wonderful man in the world, have everything you want in a man as far as personality goes, be attractive, be a great lover... *none* of that helps if you don't actually meet.
Now, I'm 5'10" or so, fairly average, I've never found height to be anything I personally am concerned about, and if thats what a woman wants to judge me on, then she's too superficial and I'm better off without her anyways. Which would be what I would tell the OP too, just move on, if height is *that* much of an issue for them, they aren't for you anyways. And I find that all setting restrictions like that does is limit you in the long run, their "perfect match" may be some guy thats 5'11", but they'll never meet him. I wish them luck in finding love based on physical preferences. | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 9:29:42 AM | Well I am 6 ft 5 so Height is irrelivant and as to transforming the little guy down below...no need to do that either..You know what they say about tall guys with big hands and big feet!!! lol | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 10:02:24 AM | | i dont think it would change how i felt about him at all. though i dont think a relationship is built on one of the partners height. you fell in love with him for him and what he was. he is still that same person you fell in love with and it doesnt change anything about him. | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 10:35:23 AM |
So its not that you wouldn't accept him for what he is on the "inside", so much as you'd never actually *meet* him because you'd immediately write him off when his profile said 5'2". He may be the most wonderful man in the world, have everything you want in a man as far as personality goes, be attractive, be a great lover... *none* of that helps if you don't actually meet.
Very True. That's exactly what I've been trying to say earlier. | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 11:54:44 AM |
a Korean laughed at me when I asked them if there were any deer up in the mountains.
That's funny. There's plenty of deer aound here. That's for sure. The Blue Ridge Mountains are beautiful. So the scenery is very nice here. I'm not so sure about finding a great career in this area though. It is quite rural. I want to move away from here next year. Not because of the area but I'm looking for better job opportunities. | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 8:56:44 PM | | Wow...I didn't know they could make someone taller that way. I really think that if you loved or cared enough about a person, something like that wouldn't make a difference. If you are compatable, why should that matter at all? I guess there are some really superficial women out there who don't care about what's really important, and that's too bad, because they may miss out on something real. I've dated men shorter than me and taller than me and I may have initially been attracted to there physical appearance, what kept me with them and mattered most was their heart and their personality. I have never had a specific "physical type" that I hunted for, but apparently some others may. Maybe they are looking for a specific type so if they got pregnant those specific genes would produce what they want their child to have or look like. Kind of sick, but to each his own. But, on the other hand, why would the guy keep something like that a secret from his girlfiend, waiting 1 1/2 years to tell her? I think as soon as things reached a deep level, he should trust that his girl isn't so shallow that she'd kick him to the curb for something like that? Maybe the relationship was long, but surface. Anyways, good question. | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 9:01:14 PM | | That was good laugh. I wonder if down there he took pills to enhance as well. Thats just retarded...... | |
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| would you still love him if...
Posted: 11/26/2006 9:04:16 PM | not even a tiny bit wud u break up wi a girl for havin fake boobs?
things like tht dont matter to the girl especailly after a year dont sweat in baby boy xxxx and if she is bothered shes very shallow and why do u even have to tell her its not a big issue is it??? wunt be to me anyway xxxx | |
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Posted: 11/26/2006 9:54:34 PM | Somebody watched that episode of Nip/Tuck!  I know most women I've known could care less if a man is over 6'. I've only dated a man that was over 6' and that was my ex-husband who was 6'2". I personally wouldn't go after men based solely on their height but that's just me so if I found out he did that to himself after already being over 6' that would bother me. If he had surgery for other reasons then maybe not.
Ciao ~ Gina | |
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| would you still love him if...
Posted: 11/27/2006 9:09:35 AM |
That's funny. There's plenty of deer aound here. That's for sure. The Blue Ridge Mountains are beautiful. So the scenery is very nice here. I'm not so sure about finding a great career in this area though. It is quite rural. I want to move away from here next year. Not because of the area but I'm looking for better job opportunities.
Yeah, that's why I'm here now instead of in the Blue Ridge somewhere, kind of sad people have to move nowadays to make a decent wage... | |
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Posted: 11/27/2006 2:57:38 PM | | MY personal opinion on this whole shpeal (sp?)..haha shpeal lol.anywho...is that if you have the emotional connection to someone without even meeting them in person..and yes it can happen..it has happened to me..then who cares if they are 5 ft tall or is purple. | |
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Posted: 11/27/2006 4:49:01 PM | | I still love someone I may never see again..Love is love, accept it for what it is and who you are no matter what. | |
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Posted: 11/27/2006 6:08:32 PM | | Hahahahahahahahahahaha thats soooo not where I thought this was going, not that I was sure of anything. Good god, I have even dated guys my own height, sometimes its really hard to kiss a tall guy unless you are sitting down, etc. You might as well be asking a women if she minds your fake boobs... | |
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Posted: 11/27/2006 7:11:26 PM | | It wouldnt matter if he was green, purple, had 3 eyes, or was 3 feet tall. If I was in love with him ,I wouldnt give a rats a$$ what anyone thought. | |
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Posted: 12/5/2006 6:06:28 PM | lol...lol.......lol......that's so funny of all people in this world i find it so funny of how much you claim you know about love...take the knob with ya when the door hit's you in the a55,i'll change the locks honey,find out who you really are before you claim you know so much about love when you don't ..from your broke a55 farmer  | |
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Posted: 12/5/2006 7:23:29 PM | Simply put it would have absolutely no bearing to me if he confessed this procedure......I can't see a reason why it should.
I haven't read the whole thread (shame on me) but if he felt it was something he needed or wanted to do for his own happiness........I would say BRAVO! Anything that helps a person be more confident about themselves is a good thing in my books.
No worries here.  | |
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| would you still love him if...
Posted: 12/5/2006 9:11:40 PM | Yes I would its really said that he felt he had to change. However I would except him because acceptance is part of love and I have flaws myself. I have friends who have had sex change operations and he turned to a she and his new husband loves him just the same. I also have friend who surgery his penis for length and he did it to keep his wife guess what she still aint with him so do what works for you boo  | |
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Posted: 2/2/2007 12:52:42 PM | "wow-- give the drugs away dude"
LMAO!!!!
i spit out my tea...i needed that laugh.
ya...i'd think i were on Xfiles or Dr. Who or something...i'd get creeped out by the effort involved- not that he has short man genes. that's messed. | |
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Posted: 2/2/2007 4:27:44 PM | I just wanna say WHAT ARE YA SMOKING lol
Frist off if someone lied about what ever it is after dating awhile only thing that comes too my mind is what else you lieing about, really l have no idea why people play head games. If you care about someone why not share all of you who cares if your 4 feet why hide who you are. There is someone for everyone so they say.
Peace everyone
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