| | How do YOU handle rejection?Page 11 of 12 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12) | | I sometimes get what I call the silent treatment. My note is read then deleted.(lol) I just roll w/ the punch. The funny thing is my ice breakers are never disrespectful. If a woman sends me a note, Im courteous enough to reply. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/30/2009 6:50:51 PM | It was her...not you...don't think every women will be like that though, and be thankful, she didn't "loure you in"..before you found out what she was really like!
A polite "thank you for your e-mail, but I don't think it would work", should be enough for anyone to accept, after all we are all strangers in the beginning, so there should be no reason why anything should be taken personally, as long a the politness is there, know that it wasn't you and don't worry about it...move on! | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/30/2009 7:31:40 PM | | Why would you get upset over an online rejection from someone you'll probably never meet? Just yell NEXT and go on | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/30/2009 9:19:14 PM | Handle rejection from an on-line stranger? Is it really rejection since you've never met the person? I like that little thing on here called "Block User".  There are some pesky critters that can be quite rude. But rejection? Crap on 'em!  | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/31/2009 4:22:53 AM | I have never been really upset after a break up.....rejection does not bother me at all. I think if you are secure in your own personality, you can handle rejection pretty well. I just write it off like a deduction!lol | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/31/2009 4:39:33 AM | As someone said on here
if you have the sort of personality for which life does not stop at rejection
then you will just roll with the punch
if not, you may start to question yourself too much.
Of course it is good to learn from an experience, but if you have not even met or talked to the person, then an unread e-mail should not even concern you (unless you have written 1,000 e-mails and got no reply at all... then anyone would start thinking where they might be going wrong).
I don't like rejection; no-one does. But I handle it ok, in fact, I get better the older I get. If you didn't you'd never find a new job / partner / credit deal after the previous one went bust.
:-) | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/31/2009 5:30:23 AM | | Hmmm, meditation, self reflection, a long walk... it's even tougher when you feel like you've worked on yourself and become better and you still get shut down. Then it's back to the "drawing board". | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/31/2009 5:52:45 AM | Although the OP statement is pretty old.... I like to add my answer;
No need to reply and say you are not a match....a white lie will do....like
" Presently I met someone and we are kind of giving us the chance to know each other better. Thank you so much for messaging me and showing interest."
If I'm rejected face to face, I feel I'm like burning inside me (blushing from head to toes).
I think feeling rejected is never an easy experience, we just need to be sure of our self worth and also open enough to notice if there is room for improvement to have better luck next time. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/31/2009 7:28:16 AM | | We all get the 'rejection' and like you I do reply back thanking them for their reply and wishing them luck. I never ask why the 'rejection'. I know well enough to know that everyone has their own interestes and attractions and I respect that. The last thing I am interested in doing is wasting their time getting them to explain to me why they aren't attracted to me that is just dumb.... let alone getting angry about it. But the way you handled the angry reject was no different then I have done and those are the kinds I appreciate the most because it only enforces our own reasoning of why we rejected them to begin with... | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 5/31/2009 8:34:20 AM | | I don't call it rejection, I just figure she's not that interested. No big deal, as I've found this to be the case about 90% of the time with online dating services. After all, I've got a lot of tall, rich, single, good-looking guys to compete with locally! On the flip side of the situation, I find about 90% of the women here aren't my type, either, and about half of those aren't really looking for a man anyway. Of the women that I contact, about 25% reply, and that usually goes nowhere, except in two situations on POF. The two I met were great, I have nothing but good to say about them. Otherwise, California women are a tough crowd to please, they put up a lot of hurdles, most of which are a product of entitlement. I'm 50, I don't play that game anymore. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 9:36:04 AM | Rejection can suck, but there have been times in my life when acceptance was a much scarier proposition.
How fvcked up is that? 
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 9:46:29 AM | | I must admit, I would rather get an email back, politely declining any interest in me...usually, I just get read/deleted. I'm not on anyones case about it...whats getting mad going to do? Nothing. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 10:03:43 AM |
I smile, say "okay seeya" and move on.
There'll be another bus coming any minute....
will she be under it? Just kidding. maybe not. Depends on how rude she is. You are required to give no explanation. Just no fireworks. Maybe she looks better in real life and it is your loss. Who knows. Maybe she is not used to rejection. At any rate...no answer and a block is how I would handle that.
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 11:22:04 AM | Rejection is never really pleasant but I will get over it pretty fast. It can be frustrating when I feel as if I wasn't really given a fair shot or when I get turned down over something very trivial but I never get mad at them for turning me down. It's their life and they decide who they want to associate with, I can't just force my life on to theirs.
A part of me does wants to know what made them not want to talk to me but those are just little insecurities. As much as I would like to know what others are really thinking, it wouldn't really be fair for me to impose those insecurities on to them like that.
When I get an email from someone who doesn't interest me I will email them back and try to be polite and empathetic about it. I know it's already unpleasant enough for them as it is. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 11:26:38 AM | I've learned a lot from these forums... the thing to do is start a thread outlining all the evil intent of the rejector maintaining as much of a level of innocence as possible.... and slam anyone that suggests you had absolutely any part in anything... as you are simply a virtual God's gift to all -- in search of same.  | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 8:52:36 PM | I say "the nerve of that jerk".......then, I get over it.........you can't be everyone's type..... | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 9:24:42 PM | | Every once in a while i'll call the lady on it. Challenge her a little bit. Especially if she's "average" looking. A real hottie i can understand, but not a 7. I ain't Brad Pitt, but i ain't the hunchback of Notre Dame either. It's good to man up sometimes, and have some balls. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 11:16:47 PM | | I do what most do... if I get an email of interest from someone who really isn't my cup of tea, I simply don't respond. My lack of response is the answer... I think I would rather not hear anything form someone I've expressed interest in, than to have them send me some message saying they are "dating someone now" or "are giving up on this online thing" just to see their profile remain on the site, and they are clearly still looking... | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 6/30/2009 11:43:25 PM | Well, rejection is inevitable. It means you're trying. Personally, I'm good at dealing with it. In real life, I have to say, rejection is certainly not a big deal. Most of the time, I can still have a decent friendly conversation, if not make a friend or acquaintance with that person. I guess as long as you're genuine, and not just hitting on them, it's not too awkward.
Online, however, I don't like the whole non-response, read/deleted thing. I get that you're not interested, but it's just way too easy to be antisocial. Make an effort to communicate people! Who knows, you might actually help me understand myself better (isn't that the whole point of dating, anyway).
Also, on a separate note, I get that on a dating website, women will always get more attention then they usually would in real life, but don't assume all guys are hitting on you when they write to you, and have a normal conversation. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 7/11/2009 8:01:24 PM | ouch ><
Some people have low self esteem and when you reject them verbally it really hurts.
I think that not being upfront is worst though, you did the right thing in my opinion. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 7/11/2009 10:24:51 PM | I'm no stranger to rejection. I can't say it doesn't bother me. But I can say it doesn't bother me for very long. I try to keep myself humble so no one else has to do it for me. When i face rejection it's not a big blow to my ego. I know who I am so other people's acceptance or rejection doesn't really shake that conviction.
When I'm rejected I try my best to wish that person happiness. Why should a person be seen as defective just because they rejected me? Who the hell am I? I'm not for everybody.
I have been in situations where I've approached women respectfully and then they rejected me with a real nasty attitude or they go brag to their friends within earshot. For some people, rejecting others is an ego trip. | |
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| How do YOU handle rejection?
Posted: 7/15/2009 7:40:24 PM | Everyone gets rejected somewhere along the line ...you just have to get past it. I have been rejected and I have rejected too. Listen to this: I had drinks with a man a couple of weeks ago. Yes, we got along, talked, shared things in common etc., but the next day I knew that we would never be more than friends. I saw he was on chat and sent another thank you for the drinks even though we had already texted the night before. I mentioned that he was very interesting, but that I didn't think we could be more than friends and that I hoped to see him at one of the local POF parties. WELL... I got the nastiest chat back, plus email, plus text and he used my being a couple years older in derogatory ways.... THEN, he, under a different email or a friend of his, sent the most vile email saying that he had heard things about me - (none of which were true). He had even told me I was much prettier in person than my picture when we met.....NOW as the rejected one (though nicely), he showed his true colors. My only response was that I guess I made the right decision then, didn't I.....
This guy reacted so over-the-top that I consider myself lucky to have made the right choice. If this is his typical reaction to things, I understand now why he has been married 3 times, of course, the divorces were not his fault either!!!! | |
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